by Gerri Hill
“Yes. E-mail that to me.” She looked at her watch—it was now well past one. “I need to get to the rig, plug this data in. I’ll call Reynolds and let him know our thoughts.” She turned to Jim. “Sorry. I’ll keep you up-to-date as well as I can.”
“Just so Andi’s up-to-date,” he said, plucking a toothpick into his mouth. “I’ll try to stay out of your way.”
She glanced at Andrea. “I’ll call you.”
“Okay.”
She hurried back to her truck, her mind racing with this new information. She tapped the console, bringing it to life. She typed in her code, then put a call into Murdock.
“That was kinda fun to watch,” Jim said.
“What?”
“You two.”
“What do you mean?”
He took his toothpick out of his mouth. “I’ve been in law enforcement over forty years, Andi. Even though the last twenty-five have been spent right here in Sedona, I’ve been around the block a time or two,” he said. “And you two have got a connection.”
She felt a blush immediately cover her face and she looked away, only to hear him laugh.
“I don’t mean that kind of connection, although that’s quite obvious too.”
She bit her lip. “It is?”
“Quite. But I was talking about you working together. You communicate without words, you anticipate the other’s train of thought. All signs of a good partner. I’m just saying, you work well together.”
She nodded. “After the first couple of days—when I wanted to strangle her—I never would have thought so, but yeah, we do.”
He smiled gently. “And the other?”
She sighed. “It just sort of happened. I’m sorry. I know—”
“Oh, hell, don’t apologize, Andi. I’m just happy to see some life in you, that’s all. You’ve kept yourself so closed off since you’ve been here, I was afraid that was going to be a lifelong habit.”
She swallowed then cleared her throat. “For whatever reason, she’s been able to ease my guilt somewhat.” She met his eyes. “Over what happened in LA and all,” she said.
He leaned back in his chair, watching her. She knew he had something on his mind and she waited.
“Over the last year, you’ve told me some of what happened. I think it’s only fair that I tell you...well, I ran a background check on you when you applied for the job,” he said.
His words took her breath away, making her chest feel heavy. “You knew?” she whispered. “All along?”
“I’m sorry. But a man doesn’t just hire a deputy without knowing what the hell kind of baggage they’ve got.”
“You know all of it?”
“I know you pulled your weapon on your captain, that’s for sure.”
“And you still hired me?”
“Common sense said I shouldn’t have, no, but there was just something in your eyes that day. A bit of desperation, I think, Andi.”
She nodded. “Yes. I couldn’t find a job. No one would hire me. You were my last option.”
“You’ve told me about your father and what that loss meant to you. Who did you lose that day? What caused such profound sadness? What caused the guilt you talk of, the guilt that Cameron took away from you?”
“I felt responsible for what happened, Jim. Indirectly. I lost my best friend. Mark. And I lost...my lover. Erin. She was my partner.” She closed her eyes. “It was a relationship coming to an end, an end she wasn’t ready for. I should have waited to tell her. But I didn’t. And that night,” she paused. “Well, that night my world ended.”
“And you carried the guilt of that with you?”
“Yes.”
“As punishment?”
“I’m not sure it started out that way. As punishment, I mean,” she clarified. “It evolved into that. Every week, every month that went by, it got worse. That first year, I honestly didn’t think I was going to make it.” She folded her arms across her chest. “So many days I just wanted to give up,” she admitted. “I let the guilt just eat at me and eat at me until there wasn’t anything left inside. I was just a shell. Just existing.”
“You still carried it with you when you came here,” he said.
“Yes. But I was managing. You know my morning routine by now,” she said. “I go up there on the rocks and greet the day. It’s a form of meditation,” she said, not wanting to go into the whole Tai Chi ritual she’d started. “I thought that was keeping me going. Obviously, the last couple of weeks, I’ve not been able to keep to my practice.”
He smiled. “Something else took its place?”
She blushed again. “She’s been an outlet,” she admitted. “I can talk to her about it. She understands. She’s been where I am.” His eyes held questions, but she didn’t feel she was at liberty to share any of Cameron’s secrets with him. “She’s been good for me.”
“And when she leaves?”
Yes, Andrea, then what? She shrugged. “I’ll be okay. I feel like I’ve purged myself, you know? I feel like I’ve put that part of me in the past now. Finally.”
He twirled his toothpick thoughtfully between his fingers then tossed it expertly into the trashcan beside his desk. She knew he’d reach into his shirt pocket and get a fresh one from the never-ending supply. He did, pulling out a new one. He popped it into his mouth, chewing it a bit before tucking it against his cheek.
“You know what, Andi? Hiring you was the best thing I ever did. You’ve been good for us. You’ve taught everybody, including me.” He smiled. “Common sense told me you’d be nothing but trouble. But my gut said you’d be the best thing that could happen to this department.” He nodded. “I went with my gut. And you have been.”
“Thank you.”
He settled back in his chair. “Now, you keep me informed, okay. I don’t want to be totally out in left field when you catch this bastard.”
She smiled, then went to him, bending down to lightly kiss his cheek. It was the first time she’d shown him that much affection.
“Thank you, Jim. Your words mean a lot to me.”
She could tell he was touched and she left quickly, not wanting to embarrass either of them further.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Cameron walked back and forth in her tiny kitchen, Lola tucked protectively in her arms. She could almost hear the inner workings of her computer as the algorithm did its thing, the data scrolling across the screen in nothing more than gibberish to her. Once it finished, she would take the data and load it into the conversion file, as Jason called it, dummying it down for her. There, the data would be sorted into a readable language that she could interpret. The whole process took hours, and she wished now that she’d loaded Collie’s data the other night when she had it.
“But I was in no shape, was I, Lola?” she kissed the kitten’s tiny head, loving the sound of the constant purring. She smiled, still amazed at how quickly she’d fallen in love with the furry little thing. She made a mental note—again—to take her to a vet for shots.
She looked up, hearing Andrea’s Jeep before her alarm signaled her arrival. Soon, the silent flashing light indicated the perimeter had been breached. She recognized her involuntary smile for what it was and left it at that. No harm in feeling happy that Andrea was here.
She punched the speaker key on the laptop. “Security is clear. Come on in.”
Andrea walked in and their eyes met, the first time they’d been alone in two days. She waited, realizing she was still holding Lola under her chin. Normally, she would have been embarrassed at the display of affection she was showing the cat, but with Andrea, she felt none of that.
“Did she miss you?”
“Yes. Did you?”
Andrea came closer. “Yes, I missed you.”
Cameron was surprised that she felt a bit nervous in Andrea’s presence. She shrugged it off, smiling instead. “Well, then it seems we all missed someone.”
Andrea reached out, taking Lola from her, immediately nuzzling the fur a
s her eyes closed. “I’ve missed having a cat,” she said. “We always had a cat or two when I was at home. When I moved out, I just never got around to getting one,” she said.
Cameron watched them, feeling a surge of...what? She couldn’t put her finger on it, but it felt good.
“I never had a pet before,” she admitted.
Andrea looked up. “Never?”
She shook her head. “We moved around so much, it just never came up.”
Andrea kissed Lola then put her on the floor. “Well, I’m glad you have one now. They’re great company.”
“Yes.” She laughed quickly. “I’d started talking to Clair, so that was worrying me.”
“Clair?”
“The GPS voice.”
Andrea grinned. “You named her Clair? That’s sweet.”
“I don’t know about sweet,” she said. She moved finally, opening the oven. “Did you know they delivered pizza out here?”
“I’m not surprised. Is that our dinner?”
“Is that okay?”
“Wine?”
“Of course.”
“Then it’s okay.”
Cameron took the pizza out and glanced at the wine bottle. “Why don’t you open it? I think you know where I keep everything.” She dished out two slices each as Andrea pulled out the side drawer and retrieved the corkscrew, quickly opening the bottle.
They settled on the loveseat as had become their habit. Cameron noted that she seldom ever sat on the thing until Lola and Andrea came into her life. Now, she’d practically abandoned her comfortable recliner.
Lola surprised them both by jumping up and sniffing their pizza. Cameron gently put her back on the floor.
“I guess she’s at the age where she’s curious,” Andrea said. “They say if you don’t ever feed them people food they won’t beg.”
“Is that true?”
“I don’t know. We were never able to hold out. Our cats always begged.”
They ate in silence for a moment before Andrea brought the conversation back to the case.
“Is your algorithm running?”
“Yes. In fact, it may be finished. Then I need to import that data into another program Jason wrote. That’s the one that feeds out English instead of gibberish,” she said.
“Jason is your computer geek?”
“Yeah. Most of the time he talks way over my head. I have to remind him I’m just a dumb agent sometimes.”
Andrea sipped from her wine, holding the glass out to Cameron. “You have excellent taste in wine, by the way. This is very good.”
“You like wine, don’t you?”
“Yes. I’ll have a beer out occasionally but rarely anything else.”
“I never used to drink wine,” she said. “My parents never had it. They had beer and cheap bourbon. When I was a teenager and most of the dads were deployed, we’d have a party,” she said, remembering the fun they’d had. “We’d all sneak liquor and meet up at someone’s house when their mother would be out.” She shook her head. “Warm beer and cheap bourbon. Recipe for a hangover.”
“When did you start drinking wine?”
“I had an assignment in France. My cover was an American socialite,” she said. “And I hated wine. I had to take a crash course, learning to order it by name. I was there for three weeks. Unfortunately, my taste while undercover was far too expensive for me when I came out,” she said with a smile. “But I adapted.”
“Can you speak French?”
Cameron shook her head. “I can get you to a restaurant and a bathroom, that’s about it.”
Andrea set her empty plate aside, turning to Cameron. “I never really drank it either. My mother never touched alcohol. My father would have a beer occasionally, but he wasn’t a drinker. We didn’t have it around the house at all,” she said. “When I joined the force, well, alcohol flows freely, as you know.”
“Yeah.”
“I never developed a taste for hard liquor, so I always ordered wine.” She shrugged. “Erin...Erin loved wine.” She smiled. “She thought she was a connoisseur, but she refused to pay anything more than ten bucks a bottle.”
Cameron watched her, noting that her expression didn’t change when she’d mentioned Erin’s name. Amazing how a few weeks could change someone. She’d like to think she had a part in that.
“What?”
Cameron blinked, unaware that she had been staring. “What?”
Andrea held her eyes for the longest moment then leaned closer. “Can I have that kiss now?”
Cameron was surprised by the sudden jolt of arousal she felt at such a simple question. “You can have anything you want,” she said, leaning back as Andrea’s mouth met hers. Her kiss was soft, her lips nibbling, teasing her, so different than the last time they’d been together. Cameron had been in an emotional state and had needed Andrea in the worst way. Tonight, however, those raw emotions were missing and instead, it was just a mutual attraction they shared...and a desire to please.
Cameron let Andrea take the lead, leaning back farther to give her room. Andrea continued to tease her, slowly moving her hand up, cupping her breast as her mouth played with Cameron’s lips. Her breathing changed, her senses alive and pulsing.
“Does this feel good?” Andrea whispered, her hand slipping between Cameron’s legs.
“Oh, yeah,” she murmured, her eyes closed.
Andrea cupped her, putting pressure between her thighs. “I can feel how wet you are, even through your jeans.”
Cameron could no longer speak as Andrea’s mouth moved to her breast, her teeth lightly grazing the nipple through her shirt and bra. She was moaning, and she didn’t care, her breath coming fast now as her lips parted. Then Andrea’s fingers pushed hard against her, making Cameron jerk her hips, the seam of her jeans pressing against her clit. Two strokes, three, and Cameron’s hips lifted off the sofa, her orgasm sneaking up on her as she tried to stifle her cry.
Andrea lifted her head from Cameron’s breast, apparently as surprised as Cameron was. “I didn’t know you were that ready,” she said as her lips moved to Cameron’s mouth again.
Embarrassed, Cameron stood quickly, her legs wobbly, and she nearly dumped Andrea on the floor. “I’m sorry,” she said. Damn, she felt as clumsy as a fifteen-year-old boy on his first date. Andrea had an incredulous look on her face, a slight smile teasing her lips.
“I rather enjoyed it.”
Cameron met her eyes, and it suddenly became so clear to her. She took several steps back as realization dawned on her. She hadn’t had these feelings since Laurie, nearly ten years before.
“Jesus,” she murmured, pulling her eyes from Andrea and hurrying away. She ripped open her office doors, standing there taking deep breaths.
You’re not supposed to fall in love with her. That wasn’t part of the plan.
“Cameron? What’s wrong?”
Cameron turned, finding Andrea standing there watching her. She couldn’t believe how nervous she was, and she didn’t have a clue as to what to say. She ran her hands through her hair impatiently, trying to think.
“I...I need to...uh...I need to get this loaded here,” she said, pointing to the computers. “It’s finished...so...I need to...uh... Christ...I need to start the conversion process.”
Andrea stared at her. “You’re as white as a sheet. What is wrong with you?”
“Nothing. Nothing. I’m sorry. I just—”
“Cameron, are you embarrassed?”
Cameron looked away. “Maybe.”
“Why on earth?”
Yeah, Cameron, why?
“I just feel like a damn teenaged boy who can’t hold his—”
Andrea touched her stomach, stopping her with a light rubbing motion. “Oh, Cameron. Don’t be embarrassed. I mean, wasn’t that kinda the point of it all? For you to climax?”
Cameron didn’t say anything, unsure of how to explain herself without, well, without making a fool of herself.
Andrea finall
y shrugged. “Okay, so you want me to just leave?”
Those words nudged Cameron out of her stupor and she shook her head. “No, no.” She pulled Andrea into a tight hug, letting her eyes slip closed. “I don’t want you to leave. I’m sorry.” She took a deep breath, inhaling Andrea’s scent, admitting, at least to herself, how right it felt to hold her, how perfect their bodies fit together. “I want you to stay with me tonight.” She pulled back. “I’m sorry. I’m just not used to being so out of control like that.”
Andrea smiled, leaning closer and giving Cameron the softest, gentlest kiss she could ever remember receiving. “I kinda like it when you lose control,” she whispered as her lips left Cameron’s mouth.
Cameron closed her eyes, feeling it start again, feeling her body respond to Andrea in a way it hadn’t responded to another woman in ten years. And it felt so good. She cleared her throat, taking a conscious step away from Andrea.
“Tell you what. If you’ll put the pizza up for me, I’ll get this program going so it can run while we sleep.”
Andrea nodded, but didn’t move. Cameron tried to read her eyes but all she saw was desire. Desire for her. She stood still as Andrea took a step toward her. Her kiss this time wasn’t gentle. It was hard and demanding, her tongue sliding past Cameron’s lips with ease. Cameron lost the little resolve she still had, giving in to Andrea, cupping her hips and pulling her close. Before she knew what was happening, she had Andrea pressed against the wall, their hips rocking together, trying to find purchase. She covered both of Andrea’s breasts with her hands, catching Andrea’s moan in her mouth.
Andrea’s hands tugged at her shirt, shoving it up, her warm fingers gliding across her skin. Her own hands went to Andrea’s jeans, quickly unzipping them, giving her room.
“You make me crazy,” she whispered against Andrea’s mouth. “It’s like fire when I touch you.”
“Then touch me already,” Andrea begged, taking Cameron’s hand and shoving it inside her jeans.
Cameron’s hand slipped past the thin barrier of her panties, drenched by her wetness. She groaned as the silky smoothness coated her fingers. She found Andrea’s mouth blindly, kissing her hard, her tongue mimicking her fingers as she entered her. Andrea’s thighs parted, taking her inside. But it wasn’t enough.