by Sharon Booth
'All those people are your family,' I said. 'Anyway, you used to share a cottage with Father in Ballydraiocht, so you were never alone.'
'But I had space,' he said. 'Father was out earning a living as best he could. I was at the school all day, and he was working in the pub most evenings, so I had plenty of time alone to think.'
'To wallow,' I said gently. 'It's not good for you, you know.'
'There's nothing wrong with remembering,' he said.
'Of course not, but at some point, Sirius, you have to let the past go and move on with your life. Carissa's gone, but you're still here.'
'I'm aware of that,' he said coldly. 'I hardly need reminding.'
'I'm sorry.' I put my arms around him and pulled him close for a hug. 'You know I would never deliberately say anything to hurt you. But we're all worried about you. All you do is go for walks or mooch around this place. You need to find something to do with yourself. And, anyway, don't you think it's better for you to be in company than alone?'
'Not all the time,' he said. 'I feel awkward with Father and Aurora here.'
I stepped back to look at him properly. 'Awkward? But why?'
'Why do you think? Here I am, giving Father permission to stay here, when by rights this whole place should be his.'
'You mustn't feel guilty about that,' I protested. 'You know it was Grandfather's wish you take over because he didn't trust Father.'
'But we can, Celeste,' he said. 'You know it as well as I do. He's a changed man. Castle Clair and the entire estate should be back in his hands.'
'He hasn't got magic,' I said quietly. 'You know the deal. Only witches can inherit, and Father's not a witch any more. At least, not in the real sense. You have no choice, Sirius.'
'I never do,' he said, sounding bitter. 'Fate's taken my whole life out of my hands and I have to follow where I'm led. Inheriting the St Clair estate when I never wanted it, losing Carissa when we had such plans, such hopes ...' He broke off and shrugged. 'Still, you're right. There's nothing I can do about it so I'll just have to get on with it, won't I?'
He strode out of the room and a moment later I heard the door of his study bang shut. I felt quite shaken. I'd had no idea how lost he was still feeling.
'He needs a job,' Star said, when I confided in her later. 'That's the trouble.'
We were sitting in the living room of Lily Cottage, having met there after work for a hot drink and a catch-up. Christmas holidays over, I was back at the museum and Star was back working in The Broom Closet. She'd dropped Mrs Greenwood off at her home then picked me up from the castle car park and we were now sitting on the sofa in my old home, sipping coffee in front of a roaring fire, while Spirit and Paypacket snoozed peacefully on an armchair.
'I know,' I agreed. 'The trouble is, where's he going to find one? He's spent the last few years teaching magic at Ballydraiocht's primary school. There's hardly a lot of call for teachers of magic around here.'
'Benedict's been terribly lucky,' Star agreed. 'He was only temping for two months before he got the job at his new school in Harrogate. But he teaches science, and science teachers are always in demand. You're right. Sirius will never get a job teaching magic around here, and I'm afraid they've replaced him in Ballydraiocht, or else he could have commuted.' She sighed. 'He was rather silly to resign,' she said. 'He could have zapped back and forth from Ireland every day, as long as Father and Aurora were there.'
'He wanted to make a fresh start and a commitment to Castle Clair,' I told her. 'How was he to know it wouldn't work out that way?'
'He shouldn't feel guilty about Father,' Star said. 'After all, Father asked for everything he got. His behaviour was appalling.'
'Oh, but Star—'
She held up her hands. 'I'm not saying he hasn't changed,' she said quickly. 'Father's come a long way and I'm proud of him. That doesn't change the fact that he messed up spectacularly. If anyone should feel guilty about all this, it's him, not Sirius. His bad behaviour meant all the responsibility for Castle Clair got dumped on Sirius, and he didn't want it. He never wanted it. And the problem is there's not a lot for him to do.'
'It seems silly,' I admitted. 'The castle needs managing more in the tourist season, obviously, but other than that there's not much else needed. You run The Broom Closet perfectly well without him, and I can manage the museum alone. Castor and Mother take charge of the Lodge. There's nothing for Sirius to get his teeth into, so why can't Father take over? You don't need magic for what Sirius does. It's all rather pointless, if you ask me.'
'Grandfather's will was specific. Father's magic was stripped so Sirius was to inherit. There must always be a male witch in charge of this town. A raven. You know that.'
'I know.' I sighed. 'And that brings me to the other problem. The elephant in the room.'
Star cradled her coffee cup and eyed me warily. 'You mean Blaise?'
I nodded. 'He doesn't mean to,' I said, 'but this last week or so, he's starting to come out of his shell and, well—'
'Act like the lord of the manor?' Star nodded. 'Mother mentioned.'
'Did she? Oh, dear. She hasn't said a word to me,' I said.
'She wouldn't, would she? We all know how much you adore him. Mother says he's awfully sexist,' she continued. 'He defers to Castor's opinion much more than hers — at least, now he knows Castor is a St Clair and not a servant. She's quite annoyed about it, actually, because Castor's not even nice to him, whereas she tries ever so hard to make him feel at home.'
'Castor is mean to him,' I said thoughtfully. 'Now that I think about it, I don't think he's said a kind word to him.'
'Castor's afraid,' Star said. 'He'd never admit it, of course, but what else could it be? He's been ever so odd since Blaise arrived — even more than usual. I think he's still waiting for Armageddon to arrive.'
I couldn't blame him for that, I thought uncomfortably, wondering if I should finally mention my worries to Star. She, however, hadn't finished demonising Blaise yet.
'Mother says Blaise is bossy, too.'
'He can't help that!' I felt my hackles rise at the thought of anyone — let alone my family — criticising him so harshly. 'He's been in charge of everything for so long in his own time. When his father died, he became the master of Castle Clair. He's lived through a brutal period in British history, and he's had to take care of everyone he was responsible for — not least the wretched Bevil.'
'But he doesn't even remember any of that,' she pointed out.
'Maybe not, but his character's been formed by all those experiences just the same. He can't change overnight.'
'He could try,' she said.
'I think he's doing amazingly well,' I snapped, unable to bear this assassination of Blaise's character any longer. 'He's trying his best to fit in. He gets daily showers, even though he's still half convinced he's making himself vulnerable to disease. And he's mastered the electric shaver, too. And he wears the aftershave I bought him, and the deodorant. He smells beautiful these days.'
Star smirked, and I blushed. 'What?'
'Seems to me like you were right about him all along,' she remarked.
'In what way?'
'Well,' she said, after taking another sip of coffee, 'you've waited long enough to meet him. The universe has had to work extraordinarily hard to bring you two together. You must be meant for each other or none of this makes sense.'
'Huh, aren't you forgetting something?'
She frowned. 'Am I?'
I rolled my eyes. 'Jennet! He loves her, and it's only a matter of time before he remembers that.'
'And you're forgetting something, too. Jennet is long dead. A ghost. She's no threat to you. Not now. How can she be?'
'Gosh, that's heartless, even by your standards,' I gasped. 'That poor woman lost the love of her life. She must have been devastated.' I felt tears pricking my eyes at the thought. Now I'd met Blaise, spent time with him, talked to him, even held his hand, I could appreciate even more the utter desolation Jennet mus
t have felt when he disappeared. 'When Blaise gets his memory back, he'll be as heartbroken as she must have been,' I said sadly. 'I can't compete with that, Star. He'll be so unhappy.'
'But you'll be there to fix his heart and make him happy again,' she said.
'It doesn't work like that. Look at Sirius. It's been over three years and he's still suffering. I can't bear the thought of watching Blaise go through that, too.'
Star put down her mug and leaned back, her expression thoughtful. 'The fact is,' she said at last, 'there's nothing you can do to spare him. When he gets his memory back, it will be a huge shock to him. All we can do is to be there for him and try to help him. And keep everything crossed he doesn't feel the urge to be alone in his grief, as Sirius did.'
'You don't think he'd do that?'
Star shrugged. 'Who knows? Grief is a funny thing.' She patted my hand reassuringly. 'It will all work out how it's supposed to, Celeste. Don't look so sad.'
But what did that mean? For all I knew, someone was already back in the seventeenth century, working to bring Blaise back. The prophecy was unfolding and that could mean he and I would be separated forever. And how could I complain, if that meant it reunited him with his loved one? Besides, if they returned him to his own time, it could mean I wouldn't exist at all, and none of this would matter in the slightest.
I tutted, impatient with myself. I was giving myself a headache thinking about all this stuff. There was nothing I could do to change any of it anyway, so I might as well go along for the ride.
'That's the spirit,' Star said, when I smiled and said she was probably right. 'Now, what do we do about Sirius and a job?'
'That,' I said, 'is something I can't solve. I don't know what to suggest, but he needs to do something fast. He's so glum lately. Even Belasko's got fed up and attached himself to Blaise.'
Star stared at me in amazement. 'Are you serious? Belasko? He never leaves Sirius unless he has to, and he doesn't like other people, particularly strangers.'
'Well,' I said somewhat smugly, 'he loves Blaise. They even sit together while Blaise is looking at those history books.'
'Golly, that's amazing.' Star wrinkled her nose. 'Is he still reading them? How dull.'
'Dull to you maybe, but he's finding them fascinating. Imagine if it were us and someone had hurtled us to the year 2370. We'd want to know what had happened in those missing years, wouldn't we?'
Star shrugged. 'Not particularly. Still, if it's keeping him occupied, then fine. The men of Castle Lodge are having a fine old time of it, aren't they? Lounging around, doing nothing very much, while Mother runs the house and you go out to work. Very cushy.'
I heard the front door open and close and Benedict's voice called, 'I'm home!'
Star nudged me and nodded at Paypacket, and we both giggled at his disgusted expression.
'Will he ever fully accept him, do you think?' I asked her.
'I hope so. One day. We shall see,' she said.
I got to my feet just as Benedict entered the living room.
'Oh, hello, Celeste,' he said, smiling at me before bending down to kiss Star. 'You're not going on my account, I hope?'
'I've been here long enough,' I said. 'I need to get home. Mother will have dinner ready.'
'And she's been away from Blaise all day,' Star teased. 'She can't bear another moment without him.'
Benedict looked at me, surprised. 'You and Blaise?'
'Not me and Blaise,' I said. 'Star seems to forget, he's in love with another woman.'
Benedict tutted. 'Technically, she's a woman who's been dead for over three centuries.'
'Oh, you two sound so alike!' I said, exasperated. 'You were made for each other.'
'As were you and Blaise,' Star said, accompanying me to the front door and winking at me in a most annoying manner. 'You wait and see.'
****
'Right, Mr St Clair,' I announced one morning over breakfast, 'you and I have a busy day ahead.'
Blaise looked startled. 'We do?'
'We do.'
Mother poured herself a glass of orange juice and hitched up her sapphire blue glasses, which perfectly matched the colour of her dress. 'Sounds exciting. What have you got planned?'
'Nowt for him to get too thrilled about,' Castor said, grinning wickedly at poor Blaise. 'Put it this way, I'm glad I'm not you.'
Blaise looked deeply worried.
'It's nothing to be nervous about,' I reassured him, kicking Castor under the table. 'We're going to have a wander around the town and the castle grounds, that's all.'
He smiled in relief. 'I can do that,' he said.
'And maybe pop into the doctor's surgery while we're out there,' I added, taking a bite of toast and chewing innocently.
'The doctor's surgery?' Blaise paled. 'I don't need to see a physician. I'm not ill.'
'And we want to make sure you stay that way,' Sirius said calmly. He tapped his boiled egg. 'You've got no immunity to modern life. Plus,' he added, removing the top of the egg, 'you might be carrying some God-awful seventeenth century disease that could infect us all. Have you thought of that?'
Blaise looked indignant. 'I'm not carrying anything of the sort. I'm perfectly fit and healthy, thank you very much.' He sipped orange juice, looking thoughtful. 'It will be good to see the town again. I wonder how much has changed?'
Sirius dipped a bread and butter soldier in his egg. 'I'd say that, given the oldest building in Market Square is our shop, and that was only built in the mid-eighteenth century, most things will have changed. All Saints Church is still standing, though. You'll recognise that, I'm sure.'
'There are plenty of old cottages that were here in your time, though,' I assured Blaise. 'You may even remember some of the people who lived in them. You never know what will jog your memory.'
'Don't you have to work today?' he enquired, sawing away at a fat pork sausage.
'Sirius has offered to take over the museum,' I said. 'So, you and I have the whole day to ourselves. Castor, did you sort out those papers?'
'Told you I would, didn't I? They're ready and waiting for you.' Castor took a slice of bread, folded it in half and dunked it in his tomato gravy. Blaise watched him, appreciating the mastery with which Castor scooped up so much liquid, then imitated his actions perfectly. I sighed inwardly and took another bite of my toast and marmalade.
'You ought to book Blaise an eye test at the optician's too,' Mother suggested. 'After all, we've no idea how good his sight is, and he's doing such a lot of reading lately it would be wise to make sure he's not struggling.'
'Good idea,' I said. 'I'll add that to my to-do list.'
Castor smirked at Blaise. 'Proper got you running around like a headless chicken, hasn't she?'
'A headless chicken?'
'At her beck and call. That's women for you. Not like in your day, I'll bet. Women knew their place then.'
'I'm sure Enid would love to hear you talk like that,' I said. 'She'd give you one of her famous looks and you'd soon shut up.'
'Who's Enid?' Blaise enquired.
'Enid was Castor's wife,' Mother explained. 'She died some years ago, unfortunately.'
'I'm very sorry for your loss,' Blaise said gravely.
Sirius cleared his throat. 'Why don't you take Blaise to The Broom Closet, Celeste? I'm sure he'd be fascinated to see what sort of things we stock in the shop.'
'I'm sure he would,' I said, realising he was anxious to avoid the possibility of any mention of Carissa. 'What do you think, Blaise? Would you like to see our shop?'
'The magical supplies shop?' Blaise paused, unsure. 'And it's safe to do so? Really?'
'Perfectly safe,' I assured him.
'Very well, I'd love to.'
'Great. Hurry up and finish your breakfast. We've got a lot to fit in.'
****
It was a dreary, wet day, which was disappointing. I'd so have loved for Blaise to see Castle Clair in all its sunny glory, but sadly it was yet another dismal Monday. We
set off to the castle grounds first.
'Do all these people know you?' Blaise asked, as they greeted us with smiles and nods and cheery calls of 'Morning!' as we strolled through East Gate and into the castle grounds.
'Some of them,' I said. 'The St Clairs are quite well known, what with the shop and the museum. But some of these people are strangers, just being friendly.'
'It's good they still hold our family in high regard,' he said thoughtfully, 'That's as it should be. I'm not sure I approve of people wandering the grounds at will, though. Of course, there wouldn't be much to stop them, since the moat is no more, and they've demolished the walls. Unless you put up a magical barrier.'
'Which we wouldn't,' I said hastily. 'Anyway, why shouldn't everyone enjoy the place? It's such a lovely spot, especially in the warmer weather. The views are spectacular.'
'Celeste! How lovely to see you again.'
Blaise and I stopped dead in our tracks, and I groaned inwardly as Hector honed into view. He hurried along the path towards us, a wide smile on his face, dimples on display. 'Did you have a good Christmas?'
'Um, it was different,' I said hesitantly. 'How about you?'
'Oh, the usual,' he said with a shrug. 'I was here actually,' he added, glancing around the grounds. 'Thought I'd pay it a visit on Christmas morning. Such an amazing place, isn't it?'
Blaise straightened. 'What's left of it,' he said, sounding haughty. 'The townspeople are very lucky our family lets them in. I sincerely hope they don't take advantage of that fact.'
Hector frowned. 'Of course,' he said. 'I'm sure we all appreciate it.' He eyed Blaise curiously. 'Are you a relative of Celeste's?'
I saw Blaise open his mouth and was seized by dread. 'Hec — Hector, this is Blaise. He's, er, a distant cousin. Blaise this is Hector, a friend of Benedict's.'
Hector held out his hand. Blaise looked at it warily and shook it with obvious reluctance.
Hector didn't seem to notice. 'Bit of a miserable day today, isn't it? Going anywhere special or—?'
'Just showing Blaise the town,' I explained. 'He hasn't been here for a few years so we're refreshing his memory.'