“Pop?” asked Penelope. “Are you saying I’m big?”
Curt stiffened. “No. I’d never say that. You’re stunning. In fact, pregnancy suits you. You’re even more beautiful as an expectant mother. You glow.”
She snorted. “Smooth talker.”
Hugh grumbled. “If he keeps smooth talking you, I’m going to…”
Curt flashed a smile. “You’re going to what? Hug me some more? Call me a baked good? Threaten me with flowers?”
Hugh made a move to come at Curt.
Penelope stepped between them. “Boys.”
They sighed.
Jake snorted.
Kelsey gave him a hard look.
He lowered his gaze.
“That’s what I thought,” said Kelsey as she moved away from them quickly, in the direction of Jake’s SUV.
“Baby, what are you doing? I don’t get a kiss good-bye?” asked Jake of Kelsey.
“I’m not going yet.” She stepped off the edge of the sidewalk and wobbled as she lost her footing. Curt and Jake took off behind her, each reaching for her to make sure she didn’t fall.
Jake nodded a thank you at Curt before staying by his mate’s side as she opened the back door of his SUV. She pulled out a picnic basket and a large thermos.
“I almost forgot this stuff.” She glanced down at her stomach. “My center of gravity is way off now. I trip over my own two feet all the time.”
Jake eased the basket from her hands and dipped his head, giving his wife a tender kiss. “Mmm, thanks, baby. But do me a favor and be extra careful. I love you and you’re carrying precious cargo.”
She grinned. “Are you planning to tell me if our baby will be born able to shift partly into a horse or are you still pleading the fifth on that one, Mr. Centaur?”
“Fifth,” said Jake with a grin. “I’m going to miss you. I don’t want to be gone from you.”
“Jake, I know the only reason you haven’t babyproofed the house yet is because you heard Penelope and me making fun of Hugh for going overboard. You’re just as bad as him. I know you’re excited about being a father but, honey, you’re driving me ten kinds of crazy. I want to relax and not have you running around the house, worrying over every tiny detail. I swear you’ve timed the trip to the hospital more than once this week alone.”
“Seven minutes from your place,” said Hugh with a nod. “Eleven from ours.”
Jake pointed to him. “On Sundays, when church is letting out, you have to add at least six minutes to each.”
Hugh’s eyes widened. “Noted.”
Chapter Two
Curt rubbed his temple as he soaked in the sight of his friends being reduced to timing hospital routes. “I’m so glad I’m not mated.”
“Keep it up,” said Penelope. “Kelsey and I were dusting down the basement of the antiques shop and we might have been discussing you by the crystal ball collection.”
Hunted Treasures Antiques & Artifacts Shop was basically a front for a giant collection of supernatural artifacts that Wilber tended to, keeping them safe and out of the hands of madmen. He’d spent the last several months grooming his granddaughter to take over the family business. Kelsey also worked at the shop.
Curt had been in the basement of the shop a number of times. It was massive, extending under Main Street. It was packed full of the weird and the wacky. He couldn’t be certain, but he was pretty sure everything in the basement was dangerous on some level.
Jake shook his head. “Warrick, if I was you, I’d demand to know what the crystal balls showed them when they were talking about you. I would not leave that up to chance.”
Kelsey patted Jake’s arm. “I still remember when it showed me you. Okay, it showed me a centaur but still. It showed me my mate. Penelope and I were talking about Curt near it, wondering when he’d meet his mate, and well, it sort of kicked on.”
Curt felt the blood drain from his face. He was not ready to be tied down. “Tell me it didn’t show you anyone for me.”
The girls shared a look before Kelsey stepped closer to him. “Oddly, it showed us a map of the state of Mississippi.”
“Why on earth would it show you Mississippi?” asked Curt.
The way Penelope looked at Kelsey let Curt know the two knew far more than they were letting on. He began to ease back from them slowly. They were up to something.
Hugh moaned. “You’re acting like you’re going to catch something.”
“Monogamy,” said Jake with a snort. “Looks like he’s terrified at the idea of settling down.”
Nodding, Curt stared wide-eyed at his friends. “I’m happy for you guys. I am, but that life isn’t for me. I have no desire to be mated. I’m so not a family man. And I’d make a horrible father. I’m selfish. Ask anyone. They’ll tell you. I’m a free spirit.”
“I’m with Warrick,” said Petey. “We’re farts in a windstorm. We go where the wind takes us. You can’t hold us down.”
Curt groaned, not loving being compared to gas.
Petey waved a hand behind him, near his backside. “Speaking of farts in windstorms.”
Hugh shook his head and eased his wife closer to him. He palmed her stomach. “Seriously, Penelope, I’m not comfortable going away with how far along you are in the pregnancy.”
“Grandpa had that fortune teller friend of his read both Kelsey and myself. You heard her. She agreed with what the doctor said. The babies have a bit yet. Relax. And please go.”
Kelsey glanced at Penelope and the women sighed.
Curt lifted a hand, drawing attention to himself. “I’m guessing the womenfolk are sick of you guys hovering nonstop. You’re treating them like they’re made of glass now that they’re expecting.”
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you just run to help my expecting mate too?” asked Jake.
Curt smiled. “Yes. Because I’m a gentleman, not because I think she’s too delicate to handle the world. I’ve heard all about her ability to shoot rainbows out of her hands and liquify demons. And let’s be honest, Penelope could kick the backsides of every man here if she wanted. She comes from a line of powerful hunters. She humors us.”
Penelope blushed. “Kelsey comes from hunters as well.”
Curt laughed. “See? They can both beat us up. And you know as well as I do that they’ll call if anything changes. I’ll get a plane secured if need be and get you both back to town should any little ones decide to make a liar out of the fortune teller and doctor. Feel better?”
Kelsey laughed outright. “Curt is right. We women need a break from you guys. We’ll be fine here. The entire town watches out for us all. You know how they are. Plus, Jolene has already informed us that we’re having dinner together nightly while you are all away.”
Penelope nodded. “And Mrs. Mays will be joining us. We’ll be surrounded by people.”
Hugh’s eyes widened. “That woman can scare the hair off a dog with her glares.”
“Speaking from experience?” asked Curt.
Hugh raised a hand but this time it wasn’t to hug. His hand gesture said it all.
Curt snorted.
Penelope sighed. “Do not make me force another cookie down you.”
“You behave yourselves and try to have fun,” said Kelsey, stepping back just as her brother pulled an old pickup truck to a stop behind Jake’s SUV.
Curt had seen the truck out in front of Old Man Nelson’s place. It had been on cinderblocks for ages. He was shocked to see it in running order. It was a bigger surprise to see Nelson had parted with the thing. The town council had tried on more than one occasion to talk him into removing it from his front lawn. He’d tried to have it declared a historical landmark.
That hadn’t worked out.
He did trim the weeds back from it. That was as good as it had gotten, until now.
Curt eyed the man that matched him in height and build. Though that was where the similarities ended with him and Leopold “Leo” Gibbons. Curt liked to keep his h
air cut in a shorter style and his haircuts weren’t cheap. Leo looked like he hacked his shoulder-length dark hair off with a pair of dull scissors or a hunting knife once every few years. He’d seen the guy’s table manners. He probably did. From the heads the man turned in town as far as the ladies, it was clear chicks seemed to dig the look.
Curt couldn’t make sense of it all. It always appeared as if Leo rolled out of bed in the clothing he wore for the day, and he didn’t vary from faded blue jeans and old, worn shirts. Plus, the man was never without his old army jacket, which had seen better days. Frankly, Curt didn’t see what appealed to the ladies.
Jake headed back to the van, opened the side door, stood just inside, and then secured his bag to the luggage rack on top of the van. He stayed in that position and looked at his brother-in-law. “Leo, tell me you didn’t steal Nelson’s truck.”
Leo merely grinned at the question and then went to his sister. He leaned, giving her a partial hug. It looked awkward to say the least. “Hey, Leo, want a peanut butter cookie?”
Hugh eyed the man. “Say no.”
Leo appeared confused as he stayed close to his sister. “I don’t know about all of us taking off and leaving you alone. What if evil witches attack again while we’re gone?”
“Then I’ll turn them into blue goo and Jolene will run over any I miss with her tow truck again. Worked out good the last time.” Kelsey patted her brother’s cheek. “Stop worrying.”
“Little sister, I’m being serious. You’re pregnant now. We don’t know how your magic will act. It’s bad enough we have to worry about your mate’s inability to control the magic he got from mating with you.”
Curt flashed a cocksure smile. “So, March, is what I hear true? You know, did you sneeze and have rainbow power shoot out of your hands at Sheriff Bull’s squad car?”
The incident had been the talk of the town for the past two days. Apparently, when the power struck the car it made everything electric go nuts, caused the doors to open and close on their own at random, and the horn to blare nonstop. At least that was the way Curt had heard the story told.
“Oh, it’s true. Jolene isn’t sure she can get the thing in working order again,” said Leo, answering for Jake. “You’d think with Jake being five hundred years old he’d be able to control magic when it’s given to him. But no.”
Jake pointed at Leo. “Keep pushing me and I’ll show you what I can do.”
Leo snorted. “I’m a hunter, Jake. I’ll tie you to a chair in a remote cabin in the woods and make you watch the Home Shopping Network. I hear you like that.”
Wilber, in an attempt to protect his granddaughter, had kidnapped Jake, tied him to a chair in a hunting cottage, turned on the Home Shopping Network, and left him there. That had been eight months ago. It was still as funny today as it was then.
Well, not to Jake.
Jake stared wide-eyed at his wife. “You told him about what Wilber did to me?”
Kelsey shook her head and laughed. “No.”
“I told him. Didn’t know it was a state secret or anything,” said Petey with a shrug. “It’s a funny story. I tell it as often as I can. Come on, how often do you hear about a super-old centaur getting bested by a hunter? Plus, the Home Shopping Network is awesome. Hugh won’t let me watch it anymore. He says I buy too much stuff from it. I don’t know what impulse buying is, but he says I suffer from it. Polly said there is no cream for that. Now I just get to watch The Wizard of Oz. Not that I’m complaining or anything. That green witch is good-looking.”
Penelope and Kelsey laughed more.
Hugh looked tired.
Jake groaned.
And Leo just looked worried about his sister. Curt couldn’t exactly blame the guy. She’d been targeted by a group of evil people-eating-witches several months back. Even in a town like Everlasting, where bodies dropped all the time, that was out there.
“I’m going to be just fine. And this trip will be good for you.” Kelsey wrapped her arms around Leo tight and squeezed. “You need to learn to get along with my husband. I know you and Wilber have bonded, which is great, but you need to bond to the other men as well.”
“I like Petey just fine,” said Leo, leaving out Hugh, Jake, and Curt.
“Hey, girls, how about you get some cookies for Leo for the road? He might get hungry,” said Hugh, smirking.
Curt laughed but tried to hide it. “I thought you were warning him off those.”
“I was,” said Hugh, staring Leo up and down. “That was before. Now I think he should eat a dozen.”
“Why? Want to have a hug buddy?” asked Curt.
Hugh growled.
Curt licked his lower lip. “Want me to invite Buster along?”
Buster, the town were-rat, could get on Hugh’s nerves faster than anyone else.
Hugh gasped. “No. I’ll stop. Don’t eat the cookies, Leo.”
Confusion coated the hunter’s face. “Okay, but why?”
Penelope and Kelsey shared a look that said they were hardly innocent.
Curt eyed the woman. “You already got him, didn’t you?”
Petey snorted, nodding wildly. “We put his potion in his ketchup! That boy smothers it on everything.”
Leo looked up. “Potion?”
Curt walked over to his bags and retrieved them. “Apparently, the girls were worried about everyone getting along. They, with the help of Petey, decided to take matters into their own hands. They made a get-along potion. It would appear they got you and Hugh.”
“And Jake,” added Kelsey before covering her mouth with her hands.
Jake tilted his head back and looked up at the sky. “You had to give me a witch as a mate, didn’t you, Fate?”
Kelsey smiled. “Hey, I’m new to the witch thing. And you wouldn’t have me any other way.”
“True,” said Jake, hopping off the side of the van. He walked to her and took her hand in his. “I’m not going to ask what you did. I’m just going to tell you that I love you and I promise not to kill your brother.”
“As if you could,” said Leo.
Curt eyed the ladies. “I think your potion needs some work. All It’s done is make Hugh look like a puppet master is controlling his arms. I don’t see any sign of the rest of them wanting to hug and get along.”
The next Curt knew Hugh, Jake, and Leo all went to each other and did a group hug.
Curt pointed to the women. “You two are awesome!”
“Hey. It was my dirty bathwater that made the difference,” added Petey, joining the group hug.
Kelsey blinked, looking shocked. “He did what? Dirty bathwater? Petey?”
Penelope blushed. “I just found out he added that to the potion.”
“I had no idea he did,” said Kelsey before giving Petey a thumbs-up. “Way to cover our bases.”
“See. That’s what I said,” replied Petey proudly. “Glad it’s sort of worked. We were hoping you’d just be nicer to one another. Hugging wasn’t on the menu, but we’ll take it as a win, for now. Who knows, maybe it will cause more feel-goods later?”
Curt looked at the alpha males all huddled together. He whipped out his cell phone and took a picture. “I really hope it does.”
The men broke apart.
Jake and Leo stood there, confusion on their faces.
Hugh just looked annoyed. “Get used to it. It’s a side effect of the potion apparently.”
“Probably one of many,” said Petey, nothing but pride in his voice. “I should warn you all that I’m a sympathetic crier. If one of you cries, I will join in.”
“We are not criers,” said Jake as he teared up. He gasped. “Kelsey?”
She tugged at her lower lip. “That was mentioned as a possible by-product. Sorry. Look at it this way, you’re getting in touch with your feelings.”
Petey teared up too and patted Jake’s shoulder before pulling an old, ratty handkerchief from his pocket and thrusting it in Jake’s face. “Here.”
Jake
pushed it away. “Thanks. I’m good.”
“Suit yourself,” said Petey, blowing his nose before composing himself. “We weren’t sure the potion would even work.”
Hugh stared at Petey. “You cooked up a potion and you weren’t sure if it would work? Do I even want to know what the possible side effects of your experiment could have been?”
Petey chuckled. “Probably not. You haven’t noticed any mange, have you?”
“Petey!” shouted Hugh, going at the older man.
Curt ran interference, as was often the case when it came to Hugh’s temper. “Take a breather here. You’re fine. Sure, you’re now a hugger who may or may not break down in tears, but that’s nothing really. All is fine. Well, unless you have in fact noticed issues with mange.”
“Warrick,” warned Hugh.
Curt laughed. “What? It’s funny. Admit it. Want to hug?”
“I don’t find my wife’s new interest in potion making amusing.”
Penelope put a hand on her hip and stared at her husband.
Curt pointed at her since Hugh was too busy glowering to notice the dirty look Penelope had set upon him. When he did, his shoulders slumped. “I love your hobby. Did I say otherwise? Silly me. I really hope you mix more potions. Can’t wait to try them.”
Petey leaned and put the back of his hand to the side of his mouth and did the loudest whisper known to man. “I’m not sure she buys it. It lacked a level of believability. Want me to back you up? We men gotta stick together. Two peas in a pod.”
Curt sighed. If Petey was starting with the idioms already, the trip was going to be a long one. The man was a walking book of them.
“Thanks, but I think she heard you,” returned Hugh, nodding in the direction of his mate.
Petey whistled, put his hands behind his back as he rocked on the balls of his feet. “Some weather we’re having, huh?”
Just then Wilber Messing came out of the front door of his antiques shop. He had a wooden crate in his arms.
Hugh hurried to him and tried to take it.
“Boy, do I look like I can’t handle this?” snapped the white-haired, rosy-cheeked man who was two hundred years old but didn’t look to be out of his early sixties.
Don’t Stop Bewitching_A Happily Everlasting Series World Novel Page 3