by kj lewis
“Where are we?”
“My beach house.” He takes my hand and leads me to the beautifully carved door. The front entry walls are a bluish gray slate. He places his hand on what looks like part of the slate. It lights up from underneath, and I hear a clicking noise. Graham opens the heavy door and pulls me in behind him. The space is large and modern, but it’s oddly open, airy, and homey. Whoever designed this room did a great job of making what could otherwise be a very cold, stoic room into a welcome and comfortable one.
“Graham, I’m in awe.” I run my hand over some of the wood work.
“You’re the first person to see it finished. This room, anyway. They still have a few bathrooms to finish, and then it’ll be completely done. I meet with designers next week to decide on furniture, art, and finishing touches.”
He shows me the kitchen. It would be any chef’s dream. He could easily host a party for a couple hundred people out of this kitchen. There’s an eight-car garage off the butler’s entrance. The wall in the kitchen mimics his parents in that it’s all doors, but these are iron framed doors instead of French, which fits the style of the house much better.
We head back into the living space. Graham hits a button on his phone and the back wall begins to fold into itself like an accordion; they come to rest seamlessly into the walls. The large outdoor space could house a small army. It’s been beautifully decorated. There is an outdoor kitchen near the back of the space that puts to shame most people’s main kitchen.
He leads me to a set of stairs off the living space. They open into a master suite made for a king. The walls are a soft light blue that complements the colors of the ocean view. The en suite bathroom is the size of the apartment I share with the dwarfs. The shower has a panel in the top that looks like it would rain down over the entire space. There are jets in the walls that come from all angles and a beautiful mosaic tiled bench on the end. There’s a solid-pane window that provides an ocean view from the shower. On the other side of the bedroom is one huge closet that would easily suffice for two people. There are stairs leading to an outdoor area only accessible to this room and out of view of the rest of the house and property.
Graham places his hand on a pad built into the wall and a door opens to two personal offices and a smaller exercise room. In this hallway, he puts his hand on another pad and a door opens leading to the remainder of the house. This provides access to the other rooms without having to go back downstairs and up the other set. The doorways are built in, and unless shown, you would never know they are there.
There are three bedrooms on the other side of the house, each with their own bath, all have great ocean views. There is a library on this level. On the third level there is a large media room and three more bedrooms each with their own bath.
“Graham, it’s incredible that you can build this home for yourself. You deserve it.”
“So, I deserve this house, but you don’t deserve a camera?”
“It’s not the same and you know it.”
“You’re right. It’s not the same. I don’t deserve this house more than someone else, but I can afford it. The camera was a gift that you were given. You saved their son’s life. They wanted to show you their appreciation by replacing something you lost in the process.” He pauses as if charting his next thought. “If you had saved the son of someone who had no money, but they picked you some flowers from their garden and gave them to you, there would be no difference. The spirit of the gift is the true gift. I know you’re familiar with the parable. Don’t look so shocked, Emelia. I grew up going to church, too.”
He watches me for a moment before he continues. “It occurs to me that I never apologized to you for thinking you were a high priced escort.”
I think he is expecting a response, but I don’t give one.
“When I saw you with Colleen that day, I had just read your background report and I drew the wrong conclusion. I talked to Colleen again today. She told me that you style the closets she keeps for her girls, so you don’t need to guard that she is your client.”
“Are you and Colleen close?”
“I would say we’re friends. I have used her services before. It’s a hassle-free affair. The girls get paid and I get a professional with no strings attached. It’s been a win-win for us in the past.”
I’m not sure why this information surprises me. It makes sense, but, well, I admit I’m a little taken aback.
“I know it’s hard to understand, especially considering your lack of experience, which I have come to value,” he adds quickly when I make a face at his reference to my lack of experience. “I don’t know relationships. I have never met someone I would want one with.”
“Then why all the ‘his and hers’?” I say.
He looks confused.
“His-and-her sinks, his-and-her studies,” I clarify. “Why build a house for a ‘her’ if you never met someone to have a relationship with?”
“I see what my parents have, and I hope one day I will want that too.”
“But not today?”
“No. Not today. Or anytime in the near future.”
I nod. “And if I say I want a relationship?”
“Then you should have one. You deserve it.”
“And if I agree to an affair?”
“Then we’ll take it as far as we take it. When it’s done, it’s done.”
“What’s the longest affair you’ve ever had?”
“Three weeks.”
“Three weeks? We’re already a week in. So, two more weeks?”
He moves towards me, and I have to tilt my head to see his face.
“You’re different, Emelia. I don’t think I’ll have my fill of you in two weeks. I would like to propose six.”
“Six weeks?”
He nods, never taking his eyes off mine.
“Your rules?” I ask
“My rules.”
“I’m not going to walk behind you, Graham.”
“That rule, among others, is moot at this point. I’ve already conceded things to you that I never have to anyone else.”
“What won’t you concede? I’d like to come to an agreement on those terms, so I know what I am truly considering.”
“I won’t concede on honesty.”
“Not a problem. That goes both ways.”
“I won’t concede where your safety is a concern.”
“What if…”
“No concessions, Emelia,” he cuts me off. “I also won’t concede control. I won’t abuse it, and I’ll give you a chance to plead your case, but in the end, I’m in control.”
“In the areas you listed, you’re in control or have complete say-so? You can’t choose my clothes, or what I eat, or who I’m friends with. You can’t interfere with my job. I would have to trust you not to abuse the control if I trust you enough to give it to you.”
“As long as you are honest about those things you listed and they don’t put you at risk, then we won’t have any issues.”
“Will our relationship be public?”
“I often draw a certain amount of attention when I’m out, Emelia, not unlike you as of late.” His tone derisive, and I know he’s referring to the gossip about me and Blaine. “I am sure there will be speculation. I would trust you to neither confirm nor deny. It’s no one’s business but ours.”
I don’t respond. Instead, I make my way through the rooms.
“What are you thinking?”
“That your mercurialness is confusing. You don’t want me, but you don’t want anyone else to have me. I need time to think about it.”
“I would expect you would.”
I’m halfway down the stairs when he stops me.
“Make no mistake, Emelia. I want you. Maybe I should afford you a preview.”
He moves his lips down my neck, running his hand down to cup my sex. “Plus, these stairs need to be christened.”
It’s official, I have no self-control, I think to myself in the shower as Teg
an and Sara wonder where the good goes.
I went to Jackson’s last night to get a little distance, but Graham blew it all to hell when we did the bunny dance on his stairs. I guess I should be happy that he wants an affair twice as long with me than he had with others, but he didn’t know them. He basically used them for sex. Wait, is it “using” if both parties are in agreement?
I’m also confused that he’s ready to walk away if I say no, but he gets all caveman when I’m with Blaine. There’s no way this ends well for me. I’m already attached. There has to be more behind the reason he’s like this. Did someone break his heart? I wonder if Jules knows. It’s about time I came clean on all of this anyway.
I dry off and throw on my running clothes. I know I did it backwards, but I wanted to wash sex off me before going on a run. I don’t want to run tomorrow, so I have a long one to do today. Sixteen miles. I’m sore and tired just thinking about it.
I head to the first floor where Jules is working. She is on a push to finish both of our designs before tomorrow night.
“Hey, babe,” I greet her, opening the door to her makeshift workroom.
She waves me in, trying to get all the pins out of her mouth.
“I didn’t know you were back,” she says with her attention still on the dress form in front of her.
“Jules,” I rub my hand down the dress. “Is this what you are wearing tomorrow night?”
“Yep. If I get it done.”
“This could walk the runway in Paris tomorrow.” I take a picture of it and text it to Jackson.
“I’m glad you’re here, Mags. I could use a break.” She stretches and we sit. I know what’s coming and for once I don’t dread talking about it. I need some unbiased clarity on what is happening between me and Graham. It doesn’t surprise me to learn she and Adam are already familiar with Graham’s dating predilections.
“Maybe Graham just says he wants an affair as a starting point to see what it is you really want?”
“No,” I shake my head. “You weren’t there. He’s serious, this is all he wants. But it’s so contradictory to how he acts when it’s the two of us. He constantly wants me to show him more of who I am, but it’s a struggle to give that to someone who admits they will only be around for a limited amount of time.”
“So, which way are you leaning? For what it’s worth, Adam and I love the idea of you two together. I know their parents do too. I heard them talking about it. They said you’re the first person they have ever seen give it right back to him. Even with his family, he always tries to take the lead.”
“I heard Adam trying to warn him off the other day.”
“He just wants to make sure that Graham is aware that you aren’t like the other girls. He’s going to have to work for you, talk to you. Not just fuck you and leave you. Adam wanted Graham to understand if all he’s looking for is to get laid, then you aren’t the girl for him. If he wants to give it a go, then we think it’s a great idea.”
“I’m worried I’m going to get hurt.”
Her eyes and voice soften, “You run that risk in any relationship, Mags. If he says he wants to give it a chance, don’t let fear hold you back.”
“I want more than an affair,” I finally admit as much to myself as to Jules.
“So, what are you going to do about it?”
“Actually, I’ve been thinking about winning him over by showing him what he will miss about me if I’m not around. We have a lot of fun together and even though my experience is limited only to Graham, the sex is phenomenal. You know the adage, ‘kill him with kindness’? Well I’m planning on killing him with a lot of Emme. Make our times together so great, that he’ll miss being with me when I’m not around. Since sex is always a good place to start, I’ve decided to dance for him.” I bite my lip with an apprehensive smile waiting for her response.
“You?” She says not unkindly, but knowing this is way out of my comfort zone.
“Yep. Maybe showing vulnerability, and believe me, me giving a lap dance will be making myself sexually vulnerable, it will chip away at his resolve.”
“That would definitely crack Adam’s wide open. Might want to let me know when you plan on doing it. I want to make sure you make it out alive,” she adds, “You might need crutches to walk the next day.” She giggles
“Well, there is one part you can help me with. I need to practice the dance. I’ve never done a lap dance for someone, and I don’t want to look stupid. Can I dance for you?”
“Hell yeah. Bring it!” She bounces over to a chair and sits in it.
“There is seriously something wrong with you,” I laugh.
“Now, I watched a couple of videos to get some ideas. The part I need to try out on you is called the basic chair invert.”
“The dances have names?”
“They do. I’m a very educated lap dancer. Now, sit with your back straight against the back of the chair. Hands to your side.”
“Are you going to walk him through all this? Because this is kind of un-sexy.”
“No!” I say, exasperated already. “I’ll direct him, just like I will you once I start the dance, but before then I need to practice this move. I put my hands on her knees and spread them a little, lower my head so the back of my neck is braced against the front of the seat between her knees. Using my feet to push off, I brace myself with her knees while lifting myself up and slowly curve my body against her chest where my crotch is right at her mouth. I attempt to spread my legs out, but decide at the last minute to add my own spin on the move. I try converting into another move, losing my balance. We tip over, landing in a pile on the floor, her head between my legs.
“Call me Winnie the Pooh,” she quips. “Cause my head’s all up in your honey pot.”
We crack up like idiots, her head still between my legs when everyone walks in.
“I don’t even want to know,” Adam says.
“I do!” Lucy counters.
“I live with her. I’m used to this,” Matt says. Becca breaks out in the giggles.
“We’re going into town to shop. Do you girls want to come?” Ruth asks, ignoring the scene in front of her.
We stand and try to straighten our clothes. “No, thanks. I have to finish sewing,” Jules answers.
“I think I’ll skip, too. Thanks for asking.”
As soon as they close the door, I put my hand over my face and shake my head. “I can’t even…”
Jules is still cracking up. “That couldn’t have been planned any better.”
When I finally get her to stop laughing, I start the music again, and we manage to get through the whole dance, this time.
“Oh my God, Mags! That was hot! If that doesn’t do it, then, yes, you will know for sure all he wants is an affair. I wanted to fuck you by the time that was over. Where the hell is Adam?” She leaves without another word.
I grab a bottle of water from the fridge, explaining to Bruiser this run will be too long for him to go with me. His sad doggy face pulls me in, so I sit on the floor and rub his belly. Ben comes around the corner and smiles at the scene.
“Good boy!” he says, leaning down to rub Bruiser’s belly. Ben looks from Bruiser to me with a sudden seriousness. “Can I see you for a minute, Emme?”
“Sure,” I answer more as a question than an affirmation. I follow him into his office and take a seat. He closes the door and sits next to me.
“Have you told Graham, yet?”
“About?”
“About John Michaels?” He rolls his eyes.
“No, sir. I haven’t decided if I’m going to.”
“What’s your hesitation?” he asks.
“I’m just not sure it’s something that needs to be on his radar.”
“I know for a fact it is something he would want to know. He’s already asked me about it a hundred times since we left brunch. I’m sorry that I drew attention to him today, but I don’t want him getting that close to you again, and I don’t want him to ever lay a
hand on you. I’ve done some checking on him. He has a history of doing this to girls. All of them drop the charges later. My guess is that he coerces them.” He hesitates like he’s not sure he wants to tell me something. “He’s been accused of rape.”
He can tell I’m shocked, so he gives me a minute to process. I’m thinking of all the things that could have happened that day…
“There are three things I want to discuss with you. The first is I talked with his lawyer today, and they claim he has a witness that confirms you attacked him.”
“What? They’re lying!” I say a little louder than I intended to. Ben raises his hands to stop me.
“I have no doubt of that. It’s his hired man that goes everywhere with him. This is becoming a he-said-she-said situation and, unfortunately, these don’t get very far.” Another hand comes up to stop my interjection.
“The second thing you need to know is that I met with Smith today, and I have increased your security. He covers Graham, but he handles all the security for our family. Wait,” he sighs and holds up a hand again. “Might as well let me get it all out, then you can have at it. I think you need to re-consider telling Graham. He is going to find out. He knows that I met with Smith, and even if you or I don’t tell him, he has his ways. My son is very adept at getting information when he wants it. Plus, Smith works for him, not me.”
“This is why women don’t file charges,” I say defeated. “Because of instances like this. No one wins in a he-said-she-said. Now he’s out there, angrier that I’ve pursued charges. Most women don’t have the money for security. Why should I be any different? I really appreciate all you have done. I can’t begin to express my gratitude, but I’m not yours or Graham’s problem to fix. That’s why I haven’t told him. I don’t want the extra security.” I stand. “As for telling Graham, do what you think is best. I would never ask you to lie for me.”