Better Than Beginnings: A Better Than Good Short Story Collection (Better Than Stories Book 5)

by Lane Hayes

  “Lower your voice!” Aaron crossed his arms angrily. “Todd’s an old friend. That’s all. You didn’t have a problem with Jay and me dancing. Why do you care about Todd?”

  “Because I know Jay! And his boyfriend. And, and…it was too sexy,” I added unhappily. “I didn’t like it. At all.”

  “You thought it was sexy?”

  “You know I did.” I swiped a frustrated hand through my hair. “I don’t want to fight with you. Especially not on your birthday.”

  “Are we fighting?”

  I almost laughed at his comical expression, but I was still too wound up. “No. I guess not, but…Aar, can’t you see my side? What if we were at a party with my friends and some girl came up to dance with me? Say you didn’t know her, had never met her, but she seemed awfully familiar and—”

  Aaron cocked his head. “And what?”

  “Did you go out with him? Were you…you know…” I licked my lips before continuing, “Boyfriends? Is he trying to get you back?”

  “Matty, stop it.”

  “Oh, shit. You were.” I stepped backward, suddenly sick to my stomach. I wondered how much I’d had to drink. Too much probably. I didn’t want to be here anymore. And I didn’t want him to tell me about some guy he used to love. I couldn’t handle it.

  “No, we weren’t boyfriends. We weren’t in a relationship at all. We’re just friends. Period. Todd’s from New York. He doesn’t live around here, which is probably why you haven’t met him. I would have introduced you earlier tonight, but there are so many people here, and I didn’t know he was on the guest list. But like I said, it’s not a big deal. He’s a friend. Just a friend.”

  “What exactly are you saying, but not saying? Please just…I don’t know, pretend I’m five and need a very clear explanation, because I can’t guess, and I don’t want to try. Not now.”

  Aaron stared at the ceiling and muttered something in Spanish before responding. “Okay. Todd and Jay were in college in New York together. Jay went to Columbia, and Todd went to NYU. They met at a club in Hell’s Kitchen. The kind of club that encourages you to lose your inhibitions and—”

  “For fuck’s sake, Aar. I’m losing the will to live. Get to the point, please.”

  He widened his eyes, then rolled them theatrically. “Your flair for drama has certainly blossomed tonight. I know Todd through Jay. We were just…friends who used to…”

  “Fuck?” I whispered.

  He sighed. “Yes, but it was a long time ago.”

  “Right. I know that.”

  I just wasn’t sure how I felt about it. Which was ridiculous. He didn’t cheat on me. I had no right to feel betrayed in any way. We both came with pasts that included former lovers. I was a big boy. I needed to get over it. Aaron’s expression told me he thought so too.

  “Matty, look at me. Todd and I…there’s nothing between us. Really. He’s just a friend.”

  “A friend who used to have benefits.”

  “Look, I know it sucks to run into exes. If you’ll remember, we ran into one of yours together and I hated it. But Todd isn’t even really an ex. He’s a good friend of Jay’s, and he’s a friend of mine. He isn’t going away. And you know how I feel about you. Don’t you?”

  I closed my eyes for a moment and nodded. I did know how he felt about me…how he felt about us. “Tell me.”

  “Te amo.”

  “In English too.”

  Aaron chuckled and set his arms over my shoulders. “I love you, Matt. You’re loco, but I love you.”

  I pulled him into my arms, squeezed him tightly, and let it go. “I love you too. And I’m sorry. I overreacted. Fuck, I have to apologize to that asshole, don’t I?”

  “He’s not an asshole. He’s a nice guy.”

  “I hate him,” I deadpanned.

  Aaron grinned. “But you love me.”

  “Madly,” I assured him as I sealed my lips over his.

  He hummed into the connection and rocked his hips seductively. I grabbed his ass and pulled him closer still. Aaron groaned and bit at my chin.

  “We have to lock the door,” Aaron said, unzipping his tight leather pants and kicking off his shoes. “We don’t have much time. Jay will come looking for us, so you’re gonna have to fuck me hard and fast.”

  I blinked furiously and gulped as I made my way to the door. When I turned around Aaron was standing naked from the waist down stroking his fully erect dick. My mouth went dry. I tried to swallow but couldn’t. Words didn’t matter. I had to touch him. I curled my fingers around him and stroked his length as our tongues dueled in a frantic quest for dominance. I could have been perfectly happy just to jack him and tongue-fuck, but Aaron wanted more.

  He fumbled with my belt buckle and the button on my jeans before unzipping me. Then he shoved the fabric down my thighs and reached for my cock.

  “Fuck, baby.”

  “You. I want you to fuck me.”

  I hooked my thumb toward the door. “But—”

  “No buts. It’s my birthday. Officially. It’s after midnight and I want my present.”

  “My dick?”

  “Yes.” Aaron bit my lip, then sank to his knees and swallowed me whole.

  I gasped and yanked at his hair. “Geez baby, that’s…”

  “Good?”

  I didn’t bother answering. He sucked and licked in a frenzy, He paused to take a deep breath, resting my cock on his tongue for a moment before swirling the tip over the wide mushroom head. And all the while, his fist moved furiously over his dick. It was so fucking sexy.

  He stood abruptly and crashed his mouth over mine, making sure I tasted myself on his tongue. I groaned and tried to hold him still, but he twisted out of reach and stepped toward the nightstand. He rummaged in the drawer and grinned when he found lube. He worked some into his hole and squeezed a little onto my hand so I could help.

  “Open up for me, baby,” I commanded.

  Aaron parted his cheeks, moaning when I pushed a slick finger inside him. He writhed on the digit and quickly asked for another as he weaved his arms around my neck. I picked him up, chuckling when he wrapped his legs around me. He wanted dirty, fast, and hard. I didn’t want to disappoint him on his birthday.

  I toed off one of my shoes and kicked a leg of my jeans aside so I could spread my legs wide; then I held him against the bedroom wall and set my cock at his hole. Aaron shivered with excitement and lust as he slowly lowered himself inch by inch. He wiggled his hips and worked himself up and down my shaft…slowly at first. When he picked up the tempo, lifting his hips rhythmically, I rested my forehead on his and let him control the action until I couldn’t take it anymore.

  I cupped his ass and thrust inside him over and over. Aaron dug his heels in, wordlessly asking for more, harder, faster. I switched positions and leaned against the wall so I wouldn’t hurt him as we fucked in a frenetic tempo I knew I couldn’t keep up for long.

  “You’re mine.” I growled, bucking my hips mercilessly.

  “Yes, Matty. Yours.” Aaron clung to my neck with one arm, then lowered his free hand between us to stroke himself.

  “Baby, I’m gonna come.”

  “Come inside me. Give it to me. Please.”

  I came like a fucking geyser. My dick pulsed and my vision blurred. And Aaron was right behind me. He crashed his mouth over mine and pulled my hair as he exploded between us.

  I leaned against the wall and held him tight. Neither of us had the strength to move immediately. We panted for air in between slow, passionate kisses. I released him after a minute and looked down to assess the damage.

  “Wow. What a mess,” I laughed.

  “Yeah. I should have taken off my shirt. Now everyone will know who I belong to.”

  I captured his chin and rubbed my nose against his. “Yeah. And I belong to you too. Love you, Aar. Happy birthday, baby.”

  6

  Better Than A Christmas Tree

  Aaron loved Christmas. He reminded me several times duri
ng the year. I didn’t blink now when he bought home “must have” ornaments for our Christmas tree…in June. And I’d become an expert at reading that manic look in his eyes when the seasons changed and the countdown to his favorite holiday began in earnest.

  He was enthusiastic on so many levels. He loved everything from corny holiday specials to traditional religious elements. He talked about the story of Christmas with a reverence that made me smile. I loved his sentimental side and the fact that he still viewed a two-thousand-year-old tale as awe-inspiring and holy.

  He put an advent calendar in our kitchen, which he informed me kept the days until the Savior’s birth. The calendar was an elaborate affair, well-crafted and beautifully ornate, intended to be reused each year. Aaron couldn’t wait to fill it with chocolates, and each morning he made a big production of opening the corresponding date’s door to reveal his treat. I wasn’t raised Catholic, so I had no idea what he was talking about when he went deeply into detail about the three wise men carrying shit like Frank and incense…or whatever. My parents were lapsed Protestants. They believed in God, but no one in our family attended church regularly. The Mendez family, on the other hand, was very religious.

  “It’s why they have a hard time with me being gay.”

  “They don’t. Only your dad does. And honestly, I don’t think it bothers him all that much,” I observed.

  “Hmm. Maybe that’s true, but it’s because of you.”

  I was lying on the sofa with a law memo I had been struggling to read while Aaron unpacked a few Christmas goodies, stopping every now and then to explain each item’s significance. No wonder I wasn’t getting anything done. I sat up and watched him fill each little door of the special calendar with premium chocolate.

  “Give him some credit, Aar. He loves you. Can I have one?”

  He tossed a piece of candy to me without looking, humming as he worked. “Sure.”

  “Why don’t you go to church more often? You seem to really care about your religion.…Or is it a holiday thing?”

  Aaron shrugged. “I don’t know how to explain it. I just don’t feel like I’m welcome, you know?”

  “Is that a ‘God doesn’t like gay people’ sentiment?”

  “The Catholic church makes no secret of its stance on homosexuality. Which is obscenely hypocritical when you think about it. How can anyone preach about loving your fellow man but then set a clause in fine print, saying ‘except for them’? The bible says God loves all his creatures, and we are all made in his image. How can gay people be less than straight people? Ugh. Don’t get me started!”

  I considered his words carefully. I wasn’t raised with religion, but I’d always been uber aware of how people viewed gay people when I was growing up. It wasn’t favorable, that was for sure, and it was part of why I had a difficult time coming out myself. We were all products of our culture and environment. I had to come to terms with the fact that what I wanted wasn’t what anyone I knew and loved wanted for me. It was an ongoing struggle; my parents weren’t exactly thrilled by the revelation that I was bisexual and in love with a man. But religion wasn’t an additional factor. Thank God I didn’t have that guilt to contend with too.

  “It’s not fair, is it?” I brushed aside a strand of hair from his eyes. I wanted an excuse to touch him.

  “Life isn’t fair, Matty. We just have to be the best human beings we can be, right?”

  “Right. So, are you going to church on Christmas?”

  He looked up at me in surprise. “I always do. Will you come with me this year?”

  “Sure.”

  He gave me a wide grin, then continued stuffing chocolates into the small boxes. I could almost see what he looked like as a kid, giving his full attention to a favorite holiday chore. Fucking adorable. I ruffled his hair impulsively before turning back to my memo.

  “I was thinking we should get our tree tomorrow. Wanna come with me, or should I do it alone?” He didn’t look at me when he asked, which in Aaron-speak translated to mean he would really like it if I went with him.

  “Maybe we should think about investing in a fake tree,” I suggested, chuckling when he shot an incredulous look my way. “Okay…maybe not.”

  “Hello? Do you know me at all? There are some very tasteful faux trees out there, I will admit. It’s just not for me. I want the whole experience. I want to go to the lot, pick out the perfect one…not too big, not too small…bring it home, turn on some Christmas music, make some hot chocolate, and decorate. It’s tradition. Plus this is our first Christmas in our place together, so it’s super special.”

  “It is special. But I remember the ‘whole experience’ being a little um…time-consuming last year.”

  “It will go faster this year.”

  “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Aar,” I huffed.

  “How much time did it take? Half an hour to pick out the tree and maybe an hour to decorate, right?”

  “Wrong. It took an hour to find the perfect tree, and you were up till midnight decorating,” I grumbled, sneaking another piece of chocolate.

  Aaron swatted my hand away. “Fine. We’ll do it in half the time this year.”

  “Hmph. We should get it and slowly decorate it over the week, so it’s not stressful.”

  He fixed me with a deadpan look. “No, thank you. That sounds depressing.”

  “No, it sounds like something you do to avoid stress.”

  “Christmas isn’t fun unless it’s a little stressful, Matty. And I like doing it this way.”

  “So getting the tree and staying up all night is a Mendez family tradition?”

  “Well, in part. We had one big tree the whole family would go pick out when we were growing up. My parents decided to go faux one year, but I pitched a major fit,” he said with a smile. “They still got their faker, and they appeased me by getting a small ‘real’ one the kids got to pick out and decorate on our own. I was sort of particular about that kind of thing, so after a while, it was pretty much just my tree. But don’t worry, I’m better at sharing now. The one we get will be special because it’s ours.”

  “Right. Something tells me I’m being used for the manual labor here.”

  “Not true. I’ll let you decorate and everything.”

  “Gee, thanks. I think you just want me to reach the tall spots, shorty.”

  “Ha ha.” Aaron finished up his task and looked over at me expectantly. “So, will you pick out a tree with me?”

  “Sure.”

  Aaron flashed a bright grin, then broke into a jazzy rendition of, “O Christmas Tree.” I picked up my book and hid a smile. He was so easy sometimes.

  I didn’t think he was so easy the following evening after work when I found myself at a Christmas tree lot in thirty-degree weather, trudging from one perfectly good tree to the next, only to have my incredibly picky boyfriend reject them all. He was at least dressed for the occasion with a thick winter coat, a hat, and gloves. Probably didn’t want me to nag him, I guessed. The wind had begun to pick up though, and I was cold, tired, and getting hungry. My mood slipped a couple of notches as I followed Aaron to what had to be the tenth tree.

  “I don’t know. Doesn’t that side look a little patchy? We may have to go to another lot. I’m just not finding anything here.” He shook his head, still staring at the perfectly nice tree with his hands on his hips.

  “No way.”

  Aaron frowned. “Matty, none of these are right. We can’t take just any ol’ tree home.”

  Okay, so he looked really fucking cute wearing my Pittsburgh Steelers beanie and a pair of black mittens, but it was cold and I was done.

  “We’ve looked at ten perfectly nice trees, Aar, and you’ve found something wrong with all of them. They’re real. They’re not gonna be perfect. But this is a good one.” I propped it up against a nearby post. “We can turn the side you think is patchy—”

  “Half the tree is missing,” he snarked.

  “Not true. It’s just a ti
ny bit. We can turn it toward the wall, and no one will fucking know.”

  “I’ll know. Sorry. That’s not the one for us.” He walked away, leaving me with the patchy tree.

  I counted to ten before I set it down and went after Aaron. I found him in the next aisle, chatting animatedly with another tree shopper about the sorry selection of inventory this year. I prepared my “Let’s try again tomorrow” speech as I moved toward them. And then I froze. I knew her.

  Fuck. I think I dated her.

  I couldn’t remember her name. Anna, Alli? In my defense, it was years ago when I’d first moved to DC for law school, and we’d only gone out a few times. Geez, I couldn’t even remember if we’d had sex. There was no real spark. She was a pretty, petite blonde, and sweet but kind of serious. Watching Aaron with her was a study in contrasts. He had olive skin, dark hair, and he never stopped talking. His hands were flying in time to whatever story he was telling her. It probably had something to do with lousy boyfriends not being helpful tree-pickers.

  I waited for a bout of unease to come over me and stir a chorus of unrest in my head. I knew how the voices worked. They’d tell me to make an excuse, pretend I couldn’t find him, pretend I had something important to do…at least until he was done making new friends with old girlfriends of mine. I wasn’t proud that I’d once battled my attraction to men. I remembered being seriously attracted to a hot geeky guy who sat next to me in biology my senior year of high school. He had a crush on me and he wasn’t overly flirty, but I’d felt like I had to be extra careful around him. I couldn’t let him know me or ask too many personal questions…even though I wanted to. It was hell. But I thought it was necessary. I was a quarterback, a popular kid. I think I had a girlfriend back then too. So what if I was bi? It wasn’t something I was about to share with anyone. Ever.

  But Aaron was different. I couldn’t deny him. However, that didn’t mean I didn’t occasionally feel out of my depth, ’cause let’s face it…Aaron was a lot. He was all-consuming with a big personality, big opinions, and an even bigger heart. But I forgot to be afraid when I was with him. I’d let go of those ghosts a while ago and acknowledged that I was damn lucky he was mine.