by Meg Ripley
They were having a baby.
There would be no more wondering or planning; it was happening. We’re having a baby. He felt almost numb as the thought rang loudly through his mind. There were so many things to think about as he walked through the emergency room doors. Vance thought he’d already pondered most of them, like where he was going to get the tiniest set of cowboy boots and the curtains for the nursery he’d set up in his house. But now a sudden flood of terror washed over him as he asked a nurse where to go to find Delilah. There would be illness, homework, bullies, friendships, good days, and bad ones. It was both incredible and overwhelming at the same time. Vance had seen warfare at its very worst, close up and personal, and yet none of that would change his life as much as what was about to happen. He barely even heard the construction noises coming from a nearby wing as he wound his way around to the maternity ward.
The hospital staff had worked quickly. Delilah was already dressed in a cotton hospital gown. The nurse standing next to her bed was strapping monitors around her belly, but she looked up when Vance walked into the room. “Are you Dad?”
He blinked and swallowed. How could it be that in all the discussions he and Delilah had already had about this baby that such a question from a stranger could nearly knock him over? “Yes,” he finally said.
“Good. You can have a seat right there. I was just telling Mom here that the contractions do seem to be very regular and growing closer together. Things are looking good for having a baby within the next few hours if all goes well.” The nurse secured the monitors with strips of Velcro and headed for the door. “The doctor will be in to check on you in a moment.”
“Are you all right?” Delilah asked as soon as the nurse gently shut the door behind her. “You look like you’re going to be sick.”
And he felt that way, too. His stomach churned, and his skin had grown clammy. Vance would’ve laughed at himself if he could’ve managed to. Birthing was nothing new to him, not when he was breeding cows and occasionally bringing one of Mr. O’Rourke’s studs over to cover one of his mares. It was just part of life—and far more beautiful than all the death and destruction he’d seen. Even so, this was getting all too real. “Of course. I’m fine. The real question is, how are you?”
Delilah shifted slightly on the bed, turning to face him completely now. Her brow was wrinkled and her lips were dry, and those hooded eyes were full of more fear and anxiety than he’d ever seen on her face before. She’d always come across as being so calm and in-charge, and it was disturbing to see that she was just as frightened as he was. “I’m in pain,” she moaned. “And I’m a little scared.”
Instinctively, Vance reached out and covered her hand with his own. “It’s going to be okay. You couldn’t be in a better place to have this baby. Everyone here knows what they’re doing, so just trust them. And I’m going to be right here by your side through the whole thing.”
Her mouth twitched as though she wanted to argue with him, but then she nodded. “Thank you.”
He hadn’t lied. Vance might not have gotten along with Delilah very well, but he’d be damned if he was going to be one of those men who’d just stand back and let the woman take care of everything alone. It wasn’t just because it was the right thing to do, either. He wanted to give Delilah every bit of strength he had, and as he saw her face twist and her body writhe in pain, he felt his heart reaching out for her. Once, as the doctor was urging Delilah to push harder, Vance had to fight down his inner cougar from lashing out.
Finally, after a lot of sweat and tears, the nurse placed a squirming bundle in his arms. “Here’s your little girl, Mr. Morris.”
Gently, Vance pulled back a bit of blanket to get a better look. She had perfect little rosebud lips, flushed cheeks, and a mop of brown hair. The baby blinked bleary blue eyes up at him as she curled her fists angrily at the world she’d just been brought into. “Hi, sweetie,” he whispered. “I’m your daddy.” He felt a crack in his heart, but not the kind of heartbreak people lament over. His life had changed forever, and all because of this tiny little she-cub.
“Sorry, I’m running late.” Delilah dumped the diaper bag by the door, but she gently set down the car seat holding sleeping little Rose in the middle of the living room floor. “She kept me up half the night, but of course she was out like a light when my alarm went off. It’s just one of those mornings.” She turned for the door. “I’ll see you after work.”
Vance knelt by the car seat, admiring his daughter. She’d changed a lot in the first few weeks of her life. Her hair had lightened and her eyes had become more clear. All the baby books claimed she couldn’t see yet, but he would swear she was assessing her surroundings carefully. “I wish you’d just moved in with me.”
“We talked about this, Vance,” she replied with a sigh.
He glanced up at her, ready to argue. Delilah wore a summer-weight pantsuit for work, a far cry from the Western attire she’d worn on that night in the barn. She was one of those women who looked natural in almost any style, and he thought she looked hot, even in sweatpants. But there was no missing the circles under her eyes and the way her mouth turned down at the corners.
“Only a little,” he reminded her. When Delilah had first come to him and told him she was pregnant, moving in together had been one of his first thoughts. But she’d been quick to dismiss it. “I really think it would be a lot easier on all three of us. You wouldn’t have to be the one getting up all night with her. We wouldn’t have to track each other down to figure out our schedules for the week to see who would need to be with Rose when. The baby wouldn’t have to travel back and forth so much, and we’d both save a lot of gas money. It’s just practical.”
Her frown deepened as she glanced around the living room for a response, and her hands twitched as she brought them together in front of her. “The last thing I want is to be a burden on you.”
“It’s not a burden.” He dared to move a step closer. Vance had hoped that once the pregnancy was over, the two of them would get along a little better. Most cows became a lot more pleasant after they’d calved, and for all he knew, it would be the same for a woman. Delilah wasn’t as snappy as she’d been a month ago, but she was still just as stubborn and hard-headed as always. “It would be a good thing. We’d be giving Rose a more stable lifestyle.”
“Rose, yes,” she conceded. “But I know you don’t actually want me here, and moving in together will only make you and I more miserable. That’s not going to be good for the baby if she has to listen to us arguing all the time.”
Vance sighed. He stood exactly halfway between his sleeping daughter and his so-called mate, not knowing what to do. “Maybe we’ll argue less if we get a little more sleep and do a little less traveling.”
“I won’t be an obligation to you, Vance. You don’t want me here.”
“Who says I don’t?” he snarled. “I’m asking you, aren’t I?” Damn it, she could get him riled up. Vance couldn’t figure himself out sometimes when he was around her. He found himself wanting to be gentle and loving, yet in the next second, he just wanted to be alone like any other cougar would. When she walked into a room with Rose in her arms, it was the most beautiful sight in the world. On the back end of that thought was always an immediate, instinctive pushback on anything that meant sacrificing his own needs.
“Only because you feel like you have to. Let’s stop talking about it now before we wake her up.” She gave a quick lift of her eyebrows to indicate her anger.
He glanced at the car seat. Rose’s eyes were still closed, but she was beginning to squirm. That was fine. He’d offered at least twice for Delilah to move in. He’d even gone so far as to draw up plans for modifying the old house to make it work for them as best as possible. The spare room at the end of the hall could be Delilah’s with her own bathroom and easy access to the nursery. But if she didn’t want that, then he couldn’t make her. “Fine. Then let’s talk about finding a nanny of some sort. You’ve got a lot
going on with the conclave. The Force has been kind enough to give me more time off to help take care of her, but we can’t both keep doing this with our careers.”
Delilah cocked a hip and rested one fist on it. “You can’t be serious! We can’t just leave her with someone!”
“Obviously, not just anybody, no. But it’s hard for me even to get my ranch work done. I’ve got to get up an hour earlier than usual to do the morning chores, and I can’t do the night feeding until you’ve arrived. I’ve been able to take her out to the barn in her car seat a few times, but it’s just too difficult with a newborn.” He didn’t like to admit there was anything he couldn’t handle, but ranching was hard, dirty, and hot work. Vance worried too much about Rose. “I’m sure with your connections and mine we can find a shifter sitter who’s qualified. We’ll screen them carefully. I’d stay with her all day if I could, but it’s just not practical.” He turned back to the dozing baby, bending down to touch her soft cheek with the back of his finger. Rose was the most angelic creature in the world. He could easily just sit back and watch her grow instead of going to work, but his livestock and the shifter community needed him.
“I don’t know.” She turned slightly away, trying to hide the fact that she was wiping a tear from her eye.
Shit. It was happening again. Delilah could get him in a horn-tossing mood in less than eight seconds, and in the next instant, she had him wanting to wrap his arms around her and tell her it was all going to be all right. “Let’s just think about it, okay?” he said gently. “I won’t do any of that without your approval.”
“All right. We’ll think about it.” Her shoulders were hunched, and never had Vance seen her look so defeated. “I’ve got to go. I’ll be here as soon as I can get off work.”
“Okay.” Vance waited until her sedan was halfway down the drive before he turned around, finding that Rose had awakened and was watching him peacefully with those big blue eyes. They were a brilliant shade of cerulean. He knew time would only tell if they would remain so or if they would turn the steely blue of her mother’s or the green of his. Whatever color they were, Vance couldn’t get enough of them.
“Good mornin’, little cowgirl,” he said as he unfastened her buckles and lifted her out of her car seat. She was a warm, soft weight against his chest, and he adored it. Rose made the whole world different. “Don’t worry about your mommy. She’s worried enough about you, and I have to admit, I’m a little worried about her. You know, I think there’s a different reason she doesn’t want to leave you with a sitter.”
Rose watched his mouth move and her tiny fingers grasped for his lips.
Vance nibbled them obligingly. “She’s worried you’re going to do something amazing, like shift for the first time, and she won’t be there to see it. Yeah, we’ve got to make sure we choose the right person. We need a Mary Poppins who turns into a cougar at the end of the day. But really, I think that’s what it is. She feels bad that she doesn’t get to spend all her time with you.”
The baby squirmed in his arms, kicking her feet and grunting.
“I see. Time for a diaper change. We can do that.” He brought her upstairs into the nursery and laid her on the changing table. This room had obviously been used for a little one before he’d bought the place, the vintage wallpaper showing scenes from various nursery rhymes. Vance had repaired the few spots that were beginning to peel, tacked in new trim, ordered a set of lace curtains, and spread a large pink rug on the floor to make space for his baby girl.
“Anyway,” he said as he got a clean diaper and wipes, “your mommy wishes she could be with you all the time, and so do I. It’s tough for us because we have to work, but we also have to be parents now. I guess it’s not any different than trying to be both a human and a cougar, which is something you’ll have to learn to deal with someday.”
Rose squirmed and wriggled, making Vance’s efforts all the more difficult as she looked around the room.
He managed to get her snaps all lined up and back in place before he sat down with her in the rocker, his thoughts growing deeper. “And that’s the problem your mommy and I have with each other, too. I want to be near her. I like the idea of having a family. She thinks I don’t want her here and that I’m only offering for you both to move in for your sake, but that’s not really true. On the other hand, there’s this big beast inside me, an animal that’s very demanding and wants nothing more than to be on its own in the middle of the wilderness.”
She nestled against his chest, her awkward little hands batting at the fabric of his shirt.
It didn’t matter to him that she couldn’t hold a real conversation yet. Rose was very easy to talk to. “Yeah, you’re right. We’ll work it out because we both love you. That’s all that really matters. But do me a favor. Give your mommy a break and get plenty of sleep tonight.” Vance brushed his fingers through her fine hair, wishing he could get all these feelings sorted out once and for all.
6
Delilah rose from her seat in the conference room and refilled her coffee mug. She’s seen the dark liquid drain and refill in her mug so many times that day, she could no longer keep track of it. At some point, she knew she’d kept her caffeine intake under control. Now, she wasn’t sure if there was any coffee strong enough to meet her demands. “Okay. So, if they want to meet up with us, then we need to make plans upon plans,” she said as she sat back down.
“Meaning?” Virginia asked.
She pulled in a deep breath, fighting against her lack of sleep to get her thoughts together. President Whiteside had just called them in for a special meeting to let them know the Austin conclave was willing to meet face-to-face. The news was huge, but they couldn’t be gullible enough to assume everything was aboveboard. “Meaning, President Kelso said he’d like to meet with just the president and me. That’s fine, and we should stick to that as a symbol of good faith. But I don’t think it would be a bad idea to have someone with us, maybe a bodyguard of sorts.”
“I don’t like the idea,” Whiteside responded instantly, as she knew he would. “It’s a threat. It shows them we don’t trust them.”
“But they already know that,” Delilah pointed out, “and we have no reason to trust them. They’re idiots if they don’t see that, and they’ll think we’re idiots if we just keep letting ourselves be intimidated by them. I say let them see that we have a bit of muscle under our shirts. Maybe part of the problem is that they see us as a bunch of weaklings they can just run over.”
Whiteside tapped his lower lip with his fingers. “I suppose you’re right. I’ve been very caught up in the political correctness of all this simply because we’re dealing with another conclave, our theoretical equivalent. If we were dealing with local shifters who were getting out of hand, we wouldn’t hesitate to make them understand who’s in charge.”
“Exactly.” Delilah felt some of her old energy coming back, spurred by her work. Those long evenings and nights were such a drain on her spirit, even though she loved Rose more than anything. There was no question that Rose was a good baby, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t exhausting. Her mouth quirked up a little at the corners at the thought of Rose curling her fists in the air when she was hungry. “I say we bring a bodyguard, and I also think we should have some sort of backup. Not immediately with us, but close by in case we need them.”
Rob nodded. “We could arrange for someone to be in the same hotel. We could even put them in the rooms that adjoin yours and just have them check in at a different time so it’s not too obvious.”
The president nodded, but he looked worried. “I suppose you’re right. Folks, I want to apologize for this whole thing. Perhaps if I had been more firm with the Austin conclave at the very start, we wouldn’t be where we are now. I miss the peaceful times when we didn’t have to worry about things like this.”
“Don’t you dare take this on your shoulders,” Delilah warned him. “They knew what they were doing, and I have a feeling they still do. If they can
take advantage of us, then they will. It’s our job to figure that out.”
“You’re right.” He nodded again, rubbing the back of his neck. “Where do you propose we get a bodyguard and the rest of our backup? A security agency?”
“Of sorts.” She had a thought in that regard, but Delilah wasn’t ready to say it out loud just yet. “I’ll work on a few things.”
“Very well. I think that’s all for the time being.” Whiteside dismissed them, and they all headed back to their offices.
Delilah automatically checked her cell as soon as she reached her desk. She’d been glued to the screen ever since having Rose. What if she took a tumble off the couch? What if she shifted? What if she came down with a fever? Her mind whirled constantly with the possibilities, and she knew it wasn’t going to get any better even once Rose got older.
A jolt of energy ran through her body when she saw she had a text message from Vance: Meet me at Saint Martin’s tonight when you get off work. I’d like to talk with you about a few things. I’ve already got a sitter.
Her heart fluttered at getting a dinner invitation from Vance, but her stomach sank on the back end of it. What did he want to talk about? Concerns swirled in her mind, and most of them were far too uncomfortable to think about for long. She tapped the screen to reply but hesitated, uncertain about Vance’s true motives. But she couldn’t avoid him forever, especially since he was Rose’s father. She typed out a reply and sent it before she could change her mind.
That evening, it was impossible to get ready for dinner. “It’s not a date,” she said to Anita, who’d come over before her shift, “but it is at a very nice restaurant. I want to look nice, but not too…”
“Sexy?” Anita filled in for her with a laugh. She sat on the edge of the bed in her work uniform, a polo and khakis. “Delilah, the guy has already seen you naked. I don’t think it matters what you wear.”
Delilah pulled a dress out of the closet and frowned at the plunging neckline. “I disagree. Clothing says a lot about a person.”