by Mari Carr
She swallowed the emotion down. “I’m fine. Honest.”
Lochlan had a bad habit of ignoring her when she didn’t agree with him. “Grab the girls and your mother. I’m taking you all out to dinner. I know a place I think you’ll like.”
She shook her head. One of them needed to be practical. “But you have the big meeting with Charles Durwood tomorrow.”
“I’ve been in this business enough years to know what I’m doing, May. Don’t worry about it. I’ve laid most of the groundwork with Charles. Tomorrow, I just drive it all home.”
It was more than that, and May—even in her two short months of employment—knew it. “You’ve already gone above and beyond tonight. I don’t expect you to feed us as well.”
Lochlan pointed down the hall. Chloe and Jenny were heading toward them. “Go get your mom.”
May stopped fighting and did as he said. She peeked her head into her mother’s room, unsurprised to find her in her nightgown in bed, happily watching her favorite game show. “We’re heading out for some dinner. Want to come?”
Mom shook her head. “No, dear. I’m a bit tired.”
“Okay. We’ll bring you something back.”
“That would be fine, dear. That man with you…that’s your new boss?”
“Yeah.”
Mom smiled. “He looks nice.”
“He is. We’ll be back soon.”
Mom waved. “I’ll be here.”
May returned to the living room. “She’s going to stay in, so I guess it’s just the four of us.”
As they walked down several flights of stairs, Chloe rained down a million and twelve questions on poor Lochlan. She was inquisitive, tireless, and smart. May adored her energy, but she’d gotten more than a few emails from her first-grade teacher about Chloe losing her daily behavior stars due to constant talking or for getting out of her chair without permission to chat with her best friend.
May actually preferred those emails, as opposed to the ones from Jenny’s teacher. Jenny hadn’t spoken a word since her parents’ death. The guidance counselor at the school was trying to work with Jenny, claiming the young girl’s self-inflicted mutism was a serious problem, one that required real therapy with a psychologist.
May agreed, and had even called a few, but the hard truth was, they simply didn’t have the money to pay for it.
“Where are we going to eat?” Chloe asked as they climbed into Lochlan’s car.
So far, bless him, Lochlan had answered every single question patiently, looking somewhat amused. “My family owns an Irish restaurant.”
The sweet girl made a face. “What’s Irish?”
“Ireland is a country on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, and the people who live there are Irish.”
“What do they eat?” Chloe asked.
“Chloe, baby. I think you’ve asked poor Mr. Wallace enough questions.”
Lochlan glanced over as they stopped at a light. “Lochlan. And I don’t mind her questions. You never learn anything if you don’t ask.” For the remainder of the ride to the restaurant, Lochlan described Irish fare, proclaiming his aunt made the best bangers and mash in Baltimore.
Chloe giggled at the name, telling him bangers was a silly way to say sausage. He agreed with her.
As they passed through the front door of Sunday’s Side—the restaurant attached to his family’s Irish pub—May was assaulted by the delicious smells, her mouth watering, her stomach growling loudly.
Lochlan chuckled at the sound.
She shrugged good-naturedly. “Lunch was a long time ago.”
“You’re right. It was.” He directed them toward a booth. Chloe darted ahead of May, sliding in next to Jenny. Lochlan waited for her to slide in, then claimed the rest of the space next to her. Their close proximity reminded her of his size once more.
An attractive older woman approached the table. “What do we have here? A dinner party?”
Lochlan grinned. “Hi, Mom. Couldn’t get to the table any quicker?”
Lochlan’s mother laughed softly. “I wanted to at least give you time to sit down. Besides, you have to admit, Lochlan. This isn’t your usual crowd.”
“Mom, this is May Flowers and her nieces, Jenny and Chloe. May, this is my mother, Keira Wallace.”
Recognition dawned on his mother’s face as she reached out to shake May’s hand. “Of course, you took Sally’s place, you poor thing. How is my son treating you? Working you to death?”
“Mother,” Lochlan murmured in a low voice.
May laughed. “He’s an absolute slave driver. Keeps me toiling from dawn to midnight with only occasional breaks for bread and water.”
Chloe, too young to get the joke, tilted her head in confusion. “That’s not what you said at home. You told Nana he was really nice and not hard to look at. But I don’t know what that means. Looking at people isn’t hard.”
May felt heat rise to her cheeks as Lochlan and Keira laughed.
“Out of the mouths of babes,” Keira said.
Lochlan wiggled his eyebrows at May. “You think I’m hot?”
“This is an inappropriate conversation, Mr. Wallace.”
Lochlan’s body stilled, and she realized he was hell-bent on her calling him by his first name.
Keira saved her, glancing at the girls. “And how old are you two?”
“I’m six,” Chloe said, pointing to Jenny. “She’s eight. She doesn’t talk anymore.”
“Anymore?” Keira asked.
Lochlan’s gaze drifted toward Jenny as well. May could imagine him replaying the night so far, recalling Jenny’s silence. She searched for some way to explain the comment without hurting her young niece.
Chloe, however, was too quick. “Since our mommy and daddy died.”
Jenny’s expression never changed. The girl was locked down tighter than a vault.
“I see.” Keira’s eyes softened and, bless the woman, she guided the conversation away to something less painful. “And the two of you live with your aunt May?”
Chloe nodded. “And our nana. She left a towel on the stove and nearly burned the kitchen down tonight. She called 911 while Jenny tried to put the fire out with the fire extinguisher under the sink.”
That was news to May. “You did?”
Jenny didn’t even look in May’s direction, so she turned to Chloe for the answer. Chloe had become far too accustomed to speaking for her sister the past few months. She did so without the same pause or expectation that Jenny would speak up, as she had at the beginning. “Yeah. That tall fireman said she probably saved the whole apartment.”
“I didn’t know that.” May reached across, intent on touching Jenny’s hand. The girl anticipated her movement and slid her hands beneath the table. May swallowed down the slight. “That was incredibly smart and brave of you, Jenny.”
“It was,” Lochlan agreed.
Jenny’s eyes darted in his direction after he spoke, just for a split second, before staring at her lap again.
“So the apartment is okay?” Keira asked.
May nodded. “The kitchen has seen better days, but we were lucky it wasn’t worse. We’ll be fine.”
“Well, it sounds like you’ve had an exciting night. Here are the menus. I’m sure it won’t take Yvonne very long to get over here to take your orders. She and Riley have been sneaking peeks out here ever since you walked in with two kids in tow, Lochlan.”
May wasn’t sure what was so fascinating about that, but she didn’t question it.
Keira looked at her once more. “It was very nice to meet you, May. I hope we’ll see you and your sweet nieces here again.”
Lochlan took a few minutes to explain to Chloe what her options were on the menu. May tried to focus as well, but her attention kept drifting to Jenny.
The waitress, Lochlan’s cousin Yvonne, appeared and was introduced as well.
Chloe placed her order, telling Yvonne to bring the same for Jenny, who, of course, offered no complaint.
When it was clear May hadn’t even looked at the menu, Lochlan leaned toward her. “Trust me to pick something for you?”
She nodded, relieved. The shock of the evening was starting to wear off, visions of her kitchen engulfed in flames, little Jenny fighting to extinguish it, her mother on the phone with 911. She could have lost everything.
And everyone.
Lochlan placed the order and reached for her menu to hand to Yvonne. May’s hands were shaking again. She really needed to find a way to control that.
“Hey, Yvonne. I think Chloe and Jenny would love to meet Riley and see the kitchen. You mind giving them a quick tour?”
Yvonne was clearly surprised by the request, but she didn’t question it. Instead, she gestured toward the back. “Absolutely. Aunt Riley has a million questions for these two,” she said, though May couldn’t imagine why. “You girls game for the tour?”
Chloe hopped out of the booth excitedly, and Jenny followed.
Lochlan took her trembling hands in his. “May. Look at me.”
She did as he said, aware that her breathing was growing shallow. She was no stranger to panic attacks, but they always came in the middle of the night, when she was alone, when there was no one to see her freaking out.
She couldn’t do this here.
“I’m fine,” she said, willing the words to be true, repeating them in her head like a mantra. She lowered her eyes when Lochlan frowned. He wasn’t fooled.
“Look at me,” he repeated.
She forced her eyes back to his.
“Say my name.”
His request caught her off guard. In her head, he was always Lochlan, but she knew it was much wiser to keep their boxes well-defined and limited to the workplace. He was the boss. She was his employee.
The problem was, he’d come into her home, met her family, seen too many of her struggles. He was a decent guy. He wanted to help. Right now was a perfect example of that.
But she couldn’t accept it, couldn’t lean on him. She’d taught herself how to manage the day to day, how to deal with all the stress—Jenny’s silence, the shitty apartment, the long work hours, the lack of money, her mother’s…
May pushed that thought away, refusing to finish it. She tugged her hands away and straightened her back, taking in a deep, full breath of air. It helped her ground herself again.
“I’m fine,” she said softly, mostly to herself.
He studied her face.
Dammit. She hadn’t meant to say that aloud again.
“I can see that.”
For a moment, she thought perhaps he was speaking sarcastically. His expression changed her mind. He looked…curious.
“Jenny doesn’t speak at all?”
May closed her eyes, wishing they could go back to this morning when Lochlan only saw her as his assistant. The woman with nothing more pressing or important in her life than making his coffee, setting up his schedule, and dealing with the mail.
“May?” he pressed.
“Not since her parents died. Not a word. The guidance counselor at her school has been trying to work with her, but the woman’s time is extremely limited, and Jenny…”
“My aunt Lauren is a counselor. Would you be willing to let her see Jenny?”
“How big is your family?” She hadn’t meant the question as a joke, but Lochlan took it as such, laughing loudly.
“Huge.”
“I appreciate the offer, but…” May was treading on thin ice here. Lochlan was her boss. Her new boss. She didn’t want him to think she was complaining. “I haven’t quite worked out health insurance for the girls yet. They’d been on my brother’s, but obviously,” she took a deep breath and plowed through the rest quickly, “that ended after his death. I’m still waiting for the paperwork to clear through the courts to name me legal guardian. My brother didn’t have a will or anything and nothing in the judicial system ever moves quickly. After that, I’ll figure out the insurance.”
“Once that clears, they’ll be on your insurance from AdLoch. But that doesn’t matter in this instance. Lauren won’t charge you.”
Her eyes widened. It was too big a favor. He’d already offered his family to help with the kitchen repairs. Now this.
She shook her head. “I couldn’t ask her to do that. She doesn’t know me from Adam.”
“She knows me. She’ll want to meet your niece, want to talk to her. I know Lauren. She’s amazing with kids. Please consider it. After all, it’s not for you. It’s for Jenny.”
May narrowed her eyes. “You fight dirty.”
Lochlan’s smile was too charming. “How do you think I made my first million?”
“Just the first million?”
“I play to win…in case you haven’t noticed.”
“I noticed,” she said, just as Yvonne returned to the table with the girls.
Both of them were eating big dinner rolls dripping with butter.
“What about your supper?” May asked as they sat down.
“Riley told us fighting fires was hungry work and gave us a roll,” Chloe explained.
May grinned. “Now you were fighting the fire?”
“I helped.” Obviously, Chloe’s tale of the night’s adventure was getting bigger with each retelling, but May didn’t mind. Especially when Chloe took over the majority of the conversation during the meal, entertaining them with all the drama in her first-grade classroom. Lochlan seemed enthralled by it, asking questions and commenting.
By the time the meal ended, May felt stronger, better able to deal with things again.
Lochlan drove them home and insisted on walking them upstairs.
“Okay,” May said as they entered the apartment, handing the take-out bag to Chloe. “Take this to Nana, kiss her good night, and then get ready for bed. I’ll be there to tuck you in after I say good night to Mr. Wallace.”
Chloe skipped down the hall, Jenny following behind.
There was still a distinct smell of smoke in the room, and May wondered how long it would take to air the place out. It was starting to give her a headache.
She and Lochlan stood next to the door. “I can’t thank you enough for everything you did tonight.”
“I did very little, May.”
She didn’t think that was true at all. It had been years since anyone had extended a hand to her in kindness. Of course, when she considered that, she realized it was because she was too proud to ask for help.
“Tomorrow will be business as usual, I promise. Barring any more kitchen blazes,” she joked.
Lochlan didn’t laugh. He didn’t even crack a smile. “I’ll call my uncles about the kitchen repairs first thing in the morning. And I’ll give you Lauren’s number for Jenny.”
She nodded, perfectly aware that even if she assured him that wasn’t necessary, both things would still happen. “Thank you.”
“So, we have one more thing to accomplish tonight, and then I’ll leave.”
May frowned. “What thing?”
“Say ‘Lochlan.’ You did it once, but reverted back to that damn Mr. Wallace. Clearly you need to practice.”
Her shoulders slumped. The man hadn’t lied when he said he played to win. She blew out a frustrated breath but said nothing.
He persisted. “Sally always called me Lochlan.”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
“She was older, the two of you had worked together for years, and she—” Shit. May had nearly finished that sentence with she wasn’t attracted to you.
For a second, she thought perhaps she had said it. Or that Lochlan could read her mind because his eyes drifted to her lips…and she got the impression the attraction wasn’t one-sided.
She dismissed the idea. Her life was a mess and Lochlan had just gotten the grand tour. Her baggage had baggage. More likely, he just felt sorry for her.
“I’m not leaving until you say my name again.”
She shook her head, laughing at his persiste
nce. “Part of me is compelled to teach you a lesson in accepting the word ‘no’ with good grace by making you stand there all night.”
He crossed his arms and, once again, she felt his size and strength. It was odd how he could increase his presence with just a look or that dominating stance.
When he didn’t speak, she felt the urge to fill the silence, to give him what he wanted…to please him.
Weary beyond words, she worried what she’d do if he didn’t leave soon. “Fine. Good night, Lochlan.”
“I like the sound of that. It’s getting better. We’ll keep practicing tomorrow. Good night, May.” His voice was deep and rich with a sexy rumble to it.
Lochlan left and she locked the dead bolt behind her. Something told her he’d paused in the hall to listen for that sound.
The girls were waiting for her in their bedroom, but she needed a moment to compose herself. She dropped down on the couch, staring into space, feeling completely unnerved.
“You can’t lose control,” she whispered to herself. “Don’t start wanting things you can’t have.”
Her life only worked if she maintained control, if she kept the status quo, putting one foot in front of the other in an attempt to make it to the end of every day without chaos descending.
Today had been chaos.
Tomorrow, she would get them all back on track.
She didn’t have any other option.
4
Lochlan was at the office early. Not that that was an unusual occurrence. He was typically the first one in. What was strange was that he hadn’t fired up his computer two seconds after sitting down at his desk.
Instead, he leaned back in his chair and waited for the outer office door to open, for May to arrive.
Seeing May’s home life a few days earlier had thrown him for a loop, rattled his world with such force, he was struggling to find his footing.
Lochlan prided himself on his well-ordered life. He’d put everything exactly where he wanted it—work, home, family, sex. Put it all in neat little boxes, organized, prioritized.
Work trumped everything…except his family. Pop Pop and his parents had instilled a serious work ethic in him, but they’d also driven home the belief that family was the most important thing.