by carol fears
The next morning at breakfast, William told Carina that he wanted to show her something outside. Her curiosity piqued, Carina arose to follow him. He led her to the stables, where a familiar whinny caused her heart to beat with joy. It was Pomme! She rushed to the colt and began to stroke his soft coat. He nuzzled her affectionately, rooting in her pocket for the sugar cube that she always hid there for him. Today there was no sugar cube, so he nuzzled her hand instead. Tears rushed from Carina's eyes and then she turned to look at William. With her voice breaking due to the emotion she felt, she began to thank him for all that he had done for her.
"William, you doubtless saved our lives by moving us to safety and now you bring my darling back to me. I have a secret of such importance to us that I dared not speak of it in front of anyone else. No one must know the truth of this matter except for you and me." Carina took William's hand in hers, guiding it to the mound of her belly. He stepped back slightly in alarm, causing Carina to laugh. "Is this how you greet your son then, William Porter? He has waited a long time to meet his true father after all."
William's jaw dropped, causing Carina to laugh softly again. "Is this true? Are you certain of this? I would give my very soul if it could be true."
"I can assure you of the truth of this. Although this fact is for your ears alone, my marriage to Joshua was never consummated. Because of an unfortunate distaste for women on his part, he never had connubial knowledge of me. The only man who has known me in that way is you, my darling."
"Carina, Carina, you have made me the happiest man in the world." He engulfed her in an embrace that threatened to squeeze the breath out of her before he reminded himself of her condition and loosed it slightly. Raining kisses upon her face and neck, he lost himself in the joy of Carina and his child. As he was pressed against her, he felt a distinct jolt from the child within and jumped back, startled. Carina laughed out loud at the comical look on his face. She led him to a bench in the stall where they both sat down.
"I am delighted that you are so happy about this child of ours, William. He has sustained me through all these months while we were separated. There is one small thing that we cannot do, however. We cannot let Mother Prewitt know any of this, nor my parents. I could never harm that dear lady; my mother-in-law with the knowledge that Joshua is not this baby's sire. Nor can I shame my parents with the fact that you are the father of my child.
"But Carina, how can you expect me to keep this secret? My son deserves to know who his father is! I understand your noble motives in trying to protect Mrs. Prewitt from hurt. But if we are married as soon as your period of mourning is over, can I not acknowledge my child?"
"Perhaps, William, I am afraid I have not thought into the future past my child's birth. We both need to be cautious right now. I beg you be patient as we plan for the future. You may play the role of doting uncle until we solve this dilemma in a way that is good for all." Carina held William's hand, then again moved it to the mound where her babe lay within. His face was warmed with love. Carina was content for the first time in four long years.
Mr. Blanchett rose at dawn on May 20 to ride with Pebo to the train station. Even though Pebo had papers making him legally free, it would be prudent for a responsible white planter to make sure he got on the northbound train without incident. Mr. Blanchett wouldn't feel relaxed until Pebo was well on his way out of the southern states. When they arrived at the little station it was almost time for the train to pull in. Pebo could hear a whistle in the distance; a sound that filled him with a mixture of anticipation and not a little anxiety.
"I want to wish you Godspeed, Pebo. You won't really need luck because I know that you have the wit and the ambition to make something of yourself in this world. You will make your parents and me proud of you, I have no doubt. Perhaps after you have been at school for awhile you could write a letter to let us know of your adventures." Mr. Blanchett reached out to shake Pebo's hand warmly.
Pebo was trying hard to hold back his tears, but one slipped down his cheek as he returned Mr. Blanchett's handshake. "Master, there ain't no way I can ever thank you enough for what you done for me. The only thing I can do is use the chance you gave me the best I can. And I will do that, sir."
The train pulled up to the small platform. Pebo picked up a cardboard container wrapped with twine containing food for his journey. A small carpet bag held his personal belongings. He stepped up into the train and sat down in the second car. He watched out the window until Mr. Blanchett and the train station had long since disappeared from view.
Lettie Prewitt and the Blanchetts returned to Natchez at the end of June for the memorial service for Joshua and Mr. Prewitt. William was in Natchez, still assisting with the rebuilding of the decimated city so he also attended. Carina was not able to be present because of her advanced pregnancy. The bodies of the two men were never recovered. Mrs. Prewitt maintained a calm, stoic demeanor throughout the service, only breaking down after the families met in William's apartment. They took a meal together and then discussed Mr. Prewitt's estate at some length. William had informed Mrs. Prewitt that the combination to the safe was lost with her husband and son. She gave permission for a locksmith to open it by force to gain access to its contents. The next day the locksmith began his work
Late in the day, William visited Mrs. Prewitt in his apartment where she had been resting. He carried a large folder full of documents which he placed on the dining table.
"Whatever sorrow you have endured due to the loss of your husband and son, Mrs. Prewitt, you are at least left a very rich woman. Mr. Prewitt made many astute investments and has provided for your continued security for the rest of your life. He also left a sizable sum to Carina which he added to his will after she became pregnant with Joshua's child." Although it galled him to say that sentence William managed to carry it off.
"Thank you, William, for your efforts on my behalf. I am sure that Carina will be grateful that she and my grandchild will never have to want for anything. I intend to live simply for the rest of my days, perhaps in a small house here in Natchez. I have no intention of rebuilding Easton Hall. In fact, I shall have workmen remove even the foundations and outbuildings remaining. I will sell the land to the highest bidder. Although Easton Hall was a happy place for me when Lemuel and Joshua were alive, there is nothing there for me now. If you don't have any objection, William, I would like to commission you to take care of that matter for me."
William bowed to Mrs.Prewitt. "I would be honored, ma'am. And for all the kindnesses that you and your family have shown me, please allow me to become your attorney of record, gratis."
"Thank you, William." Mrs. Prewitt rose from her chair, embracing him warmly.
Together William and Mrs. Prewitt found a charming white cottage which had not been damaged by the tornado. It was conveniently close to the downtown area of Natchez. The tiny house was surrounded by roses and wisteria. A white picket fence enclosed the yard. An arched front gate was covered in deep violet clematis. The house was already furnished by the previous owner who did not wish to take the furniture when he left town. Mrs. Prewitt found it perfect for her needs and moved right in.
The Blanchetts bid their Mrs. Prewitt and William good-by and then journeyed back to Camellia Hill. Carina was overjoyed to see them. She asked them for a recounting of the events in Natchez. They described the memorial service for her husband and father-in-law in great detail. She was gratified to hear that almost the entire city had been present to honor the Prewitt men. The conversation finally came around to the safe and its valuable contents. Carina was overwhelmed to learn of the fortune that had been left to her on behalf of her child. She vowed to raise him to honor his supposed father and grandfather.
On August 6, 1840 Carina was delivered of a healthy baby boy. He cried lustily as soon as he was born, waving his little fists furiously, causing his face to become red. His hair was red, a slightly lighter shade than his mother's auburn tresses. Carina looked at the boy and saw Wi
lliam's features unmistakably on his face. No one else remarked on the similarity although several visitors told her that he looked just like his father Joshua. Carina merely smiled and nodded when she heard those words.
William visited Carina and his son three days after the boys' birth. He cradled his tiny son in his arms as tears of joy streamed down his face. The new parents were in private, finally able to revel in the love they both felt for their child. William laughed and said that he was delighted that the young one shared his beautiful mother's shade of hair, albeit somewhat less flaming. When the babe was hungry he screwed up his face in infant rage. With his red face and red hair he was a sight to behold. They decided to call him Thomas Lemuel in honor of her father and Joshua's father. "Tommy" it was from that day forward.
The Beginning
hen Tommy was six months old Carina and William were married quietly at Camellia Hill. Both Carina's parents and William's were present along with William's brother. There were few other guests since Carina was still technically in mourning for her husband and father-in-law, but the bride and groom didn't notice, having eyes only for each other. Their joy was transparent to everyone around them. Delia hugged her mistress after the wedding and whispered that she was glad her mistress was finally happy. Carina looked at her sharply, realizing that Delia had known exactly what was going on between her and Joshua. She was relieved to have at least one confidante.
The newlyweds moved into a small cottage on the property at Camellia Hill. Carina had asked for some basic furnishings to be brought out from the house, but she didn't put too much care into making the place beautiful because she knew that they would not stay there long. They would find a place of their own soon. Carina's wealth, coupled with William's savings from his law practice meant that they did not need to worry about money.
Carina and William spent a month in the little cottage delighting in each other body and soul. Delia kept Tommy in the big house, bringing him to his mother for feeding. Carina would always remember these perfect days as the happiest in her life. She and William lay together in the big bed dreaming and talking together for hours on end. They explored each others' bodies until there were no further unknown places between them. Sated on love-making, they would go for long walks in the gardens or in the woods around the property. Then they would return home for more love-making. Delia was always careful to knock loudly when she brought Tommy to his mother. To see the happy threesome piled up in the big bed together made Delia smile. She thanked God every night in her prayers for her mistress's joy. The days and nights of the honeymoon flew by too fast.
William remained dissatisfied because he could not declare his son's parentage even though he and Carina were legally married. He decided to adopt the boy to further strengthen the bond between father and son. His impatience to declare the son his natural child caused him frustration even though he knew that it was in Tommy's best interest if folks hereabout had no knowledge of the truth. He wanted to own the boy, but didn't want him to carry the hated epithet "bastard."
After the honeymoon, William had to return to his law office in Natchez to resume his practice. He had a great many clients waiting for his services and didn't want to inconvenience them or cause them financial loss. He didn't think that his little set of rooms over the office was suitable for Carina and Tommy and so for the time being left them at Camellia Hill. He found himself miserably lonely without them. At night he wondered to himself how he had lived without Carina all those years. He could no more imagine living without his wife and son now than living without his right arm. He enjoyed the practice of law but couldn't seem to get caught up in the complexities of it now as he had in the past. There was something else he felt he was meant to do. What that thing might be he didn't know yet, but he began to toss around in his mind for the answer.
When he could find a spare hour or two he continued to help his neighbors rebuild their homes. When planting time came he pitched in to help some women who had lost their men to the storm to plow their fields. He asked the other workmen for advice since he had no previous experience of farming. He sat beside men who were repairing tools or cleaning them to get ready for use. Whenever he had a day or two free he would hurry back to Camellia Hill to spend as much time as possible with Carina and Tommy. Perhaps because of selfimposed abstinence, William and Carina found that their desire for one another had not waned. In fact their passion for each other seemed to increase. They were only really satisfied when in each others' arms.
Carina began riding Pomme again whenever she could. She had been afraid that her riding skills had grown rusty in the year since she had been in a saddle. But she quickly found that she and Pomme were the same great team they had always been. He still responded to her slightest touch of the reins as he had in the past. Mama had begun coming over to the little cottage to tend to Tommy while Carina was riding. She was besotted by her grandson and couldn't see him often enough. Papa came over in the evenings to dandle Tommy on his knee; happy to make the boy laugh and giggle. Mama and Papa frequently referred to Joshua when speaking with Carina about Tommy. She had to bite her tongue to keep from blurting out the truth. Somehow it only became harder as time went on. She didn't want Tommy to grow much older without knowing who his father really was.
In June Carina took Tommy to Natchez. Delia traveled with them to help out with the boy who was not yet one year old. Carina took Tommy to visit Mother Prewitt who was delighted to see her grandson. She took him in her arms to cradle and coo to him. Carina's mother-in-law had aged greatly since the death of her son and husband. Her feet and ankles were hideously swollen with dropsy, causing her to sit most of the day. Her breath was alarmingly wheezy and raspy. She didn't complain at all, but Carina knew her time on earth was limited. The visit eventually grew to be too much for Mother Prewitt. Carina said good-by promising to bring Tommy again for a visit soon. Carina, Tommy and Delia spent the night in William's apartments and left the next morning for Camellia Hill.
A week after Carina's visit, William arrived at Camellia Hill on horseback with the sad news that Mother Prewitt had passed away peacefully in her sleep the night before. Carina wept at the loss of the woman who had befriended her during the difficult days of her marriage to Joshua. Mother Prewitt had been there to sustain her when her spirit was battered and besieged. Minnie Blanchett wept as well for her lifelong friend. Carina left Tommy with Delia while she, Mama and Papa traveled to Natchez for the funeral. A wet nurse had been found to take over the feeding duties for Tommy while Carina was absent. Carina's breasts ached terribly the entire time she was in Natchez. She finally had to wrap them tight with strips of linen. The funeral service for Lettie Prewitt was solemn and dignified. She had been a pillar of the community; a great lady who would be much missed.
Carina spent the night in William's apartments while her parents stayed at the new hotel which had recently opened. William held Carina in his arms as she wept that night.
Carina and her parents returned to Camellia Hill the next morning. Carina could hardly wait to be reunited with her son. She felt as if one of her limbs had been left behind as she had ridden away from Camellia Hill without him. His smile, complete with four shiny white teeth, made her heart beat with love and her breasts released copious quantities of milk at his touch. Tommy supped to his heart's content that day.
William came to Camellia Hill to stay for a weekend with his family in July. Carina sensed an excitement in him that she had not noticed before. He seemed positively galvanized with energy. They had dinner with the Blanchetts, returning to the cottage after dark. William sat in a comfortable overstuffed chair while Carina fed Tommy in the old wicker rocker. Plump pillows made her comfortable as she cradled her son to her breast.
"Carina I have a venture that I would like to discuss with you." William spoke rapidly, as if anxious to get the words out as fast as possible.
"What is it, my darling; you know that I want whatever you want. My only wish is that you and Tommy b
e as happy as I can make you."
"Funny, my sweetest, but that is exactly what I wish. I have been thinking about this venture a lot lately but I am unsure of what your reaction will be. However I will relay my ideas to you; and then you can give me your thoughts. Do you remember the first dance we had all those years ago when I spoke to you about wanting to wed a woman who could stand next to me on the frontier, a woman with spunk and backbone? Not a wilting hothouse flower but a woman of courage who is unafraid of the rigors of the life of a pioneer? There is a new movement abroad in this country. It is a westward expansion which has been facilitated by the acquisition of large land holdings by our government. There are offers of free land to be had for those willing to work for it. I have stood at the side of farmers outside Natchez as they worked their fields. Also, the good men of Natchez have taught me carpentry skills as I helped with the rebuilding of the city. In such a place we could start a new life. I would no longer have to pretend to be my son's uncle. I have heard that on the frontier it is a man's character and not his wealth or land holdings that are important. I would like to be a part of the westward expansion of this country if you will be by my side in this venture."