She wiped her face with the sheet. “You were just a boy.”
“I don’t think I was ever a normal kid, Sam. Hanging with drug-addicted adults who couldn’t even take responsibility for themselves—” He shook his head. “I’d seen too much. And even back then I had some built-in survival instincts that kicked in when shit happened.”
“Just because you survived it doesn’t make it right.”
Flash ran his index finger down her cheek and kissed her softly. “No, but it was the hand I was dealt. I survived it, got past it and left it behind.”
He tangled his fingers with hers and waited until she’d regained her composure before continuing. “The short of it was Xander planted drugs in my room and I ended up in juvenile hall for it.”
“But—” He watched the struggle in her face.
“With Janice’s testimony about all the shoplifting and no other home available to take me—” He shrugged. ‘That’s the way it worked sometimes.”
Sam ran a caressing hand over his chest.
“About ten months in, Xander slipped up and got arrested for breaking and entering…and drugs. One of the cops who’d arrested him showed up at the school asking questions. He told me Xander had admitted to setting me up on the drug thing and they were going to try and get me out.”
“After one of the longest months of my life, they transferred me out and placed me with a family who took in troubled teens. The place was worse than reform school, and I’d had enough of putting up with other people’s shit, so I figured being on my own had to be easier. I stayed a week, just to lull them into thinking I was okay with things, then took off.
“From Boston, I made my way to California. I don’t know what the hell I thought I was doing. I could have been killed. Had a couple of close calls along the way. Eventually I landed in San Diego. I managed to get a job waiting tables and scored a place to crash with a couple of other guys. Money was tight, and to subsidize my income I picked pockets when I had to.”
“Until I picked Travis’s pocket and ran up against someone who was a real hardass. He scared the shit out of me. Read me the riot act. Then took me to a restaurant and fed me. I don’t know what he saw in me, but after the meal, he stuffed his phone number in my pocket and told me when I was tired of being on the street to give him a call and he’d try and help me.”
“I made it another month, then we got kicked out of the apartment. The second night on the street, I got jumped, had the crap kicked out of me and all my stuff stolen. I ended up in the hospital. It took the doctor about two seconds to start talking social services, so I split. I made it about a block from the hospital, then called Travis, and he came and picked me up.”
“So he moved you in with his family?”
“Yeah. I was too beat-up to be a threat. It took me a month to heal. During that time ‘Nita, his wife, worked her magic on me. She fussed over me, scolded me, and showered me with love, just like she did their own two boys.” Flash smiled. “She’s really something.
“At first I was wary. I mean…it just seemed too good to be true, and I kept waiting for someone to either pound on me or worse. But it never happened. About three months after I moved in, Travis got orders, and we had a meeting of the minds. He was about to be deployed, and he didn’t want to leave with any misunderstandings between us. To prove I was worthy of staying there, I had to enroll in school, and I had to attend every day. Plus I had to work weekends and help out around the house. If anything happened that ‘Nita wasn’t happy about, he’d be the one to pick up the phone and call social services. In his words ‘No matter where the fuck I am.’”
“He sounds like a real teddy bear.”
Flash laughed.
He couldn’t tell her about forging a computerized transcript and a shot record so he could enroll. The very last criminal thing he’d done until recently. And now he’d broken several laws—bugging an FBI agent’s apartment, monitoring his calls, following his financials, creating a false identity. Jesus. That alone was enough to get him sent to jail.
The stuff he was sharing now was nothing in comparison. What would happen if he got arrested?
His arm tightened around her, and for a moment he just breathed in the scent of her shampoo and held on until the worry eased. He couldn’t think about losing her when they were just discovering one another.
“Travis went into the school before he left and talked to the teachers. They put me into an accelerated program and worked my ass off to get me caught up.”
“How long was he gone?”
“Seven months. And I toed the line the whole time. I loved ‘Nita, and she had the two younger kids to deal with. Josh and Javier. I may have been a little shit at times, but I wasn’t a fool. I knew I’d found a good thing. That and the fact Travis had some of his buddies checking up on me on a regular basis.”
“So he’s Navy too?” she asked.
“Retired now.”
“He’s your business partner, isn’t he?”
“Yeah he is.” She was a quick study.
“Am I going to meet him and his wife?” she asked.
He smiled and gave her a squeeze. “I hoped you’d want to. They’re the only family I have. Them and the boys, Javier and Josh.”
And what about his SEAL team? After so long would they still feel a sense of loyalty, of kinship to him?
“Travis and ‘Nita are in Baja right now, but they have a house in San Diego. If we could take a long weekend some time, we could meet them halfway for a visit.”
“I can’t take Joy out of the state of Nevada. But they’re welcome to come here and stay. I have a guest room.”
“How ‘bout we start with some phone calls?”
Nita would love Sam. And she’d be thrilled one of her boys was serious about someone.
“That sounds good. Is she going to tell me embarrassing things about you, like all mothers do?”
He grimaced. “Probably.”
She laughed.
“You’ll need to contact your lawyer and talk to him about all this, Sam. I don’t want to cause you any trouble.”
“If this is a juvenile record, shouldn’t it have been sealed?”
“The drug charge was expunged and the rest of the record sealed, but it can be opened by a judge.”
“I’ll talk to Ben about it. But it’s been how many years?”
“Fifteen.”
“I don’t think there’ll be any problem.”
He nodded. “There’s just one more thing.” For now. He had to come clean to her in layers. Otherwise—
“What is it?”
As soon as he could break away from all the shit hanging over him—them—he’d say the words. As soon as he and Captain Jackson met, he’d know whether that was going to be possible. Two weeks had never seemed as long. He had two weeks to tell her everything.
He brushed his lips against her forehead, the tip of her nose, and found her mouth again. If he said the words, and they dragged him off to jail, it might make it worse for her. I love you. The feelings were probably written all over his face. “I’m really grateful you bought that box of condoms. I’d hate to have to run back over to my apartment, buck-assed naked, to get another one.”
Sam laughed then breathed, “That would be a sight.”
He slid further beneath the blankets and tugged her down with him. Sam pressed close and drew his lips to hers. His body heated to her reaction with a need as fierce as the first time. God, he was crazy about this woman. He proceeded to show her.
Will pushed a hand against the top of his head. Rage built inside him like a helium balloon filling and filling until it threatened to explode. He fought the urge to rip the phone from the wall.
“You fucking wuss. All you had to do was push her, and she’d have crumbled and signed whatever you wanted her to, Taylor.”
“You’re wrong, Will. She’s not the cowed little ninny you made her out to be. She’s sharp. And she knew exactly what kind of loan she nee
ded to pay off the house.” Taylor cleared his throat. “She had the paperwork for the payments she’d made after her grandmother’s death. Had she not done so much research, I might have been able to manipulate her into signing something less advantageous. Besides, she wanted to bring in her lawyer. And she’s requested I fax the contract to him before she signs it.”
“Fuck!” Will paced the length of the barren living room and back again. He hadn’t bothered replacing the busted furniture. When he moved in with Sam, they’d sell this house and buy new stuff together. “I want that house. I want you to put something into the contract allowing for an interest fluctuation so you can run up the payments.”
“I can’t, Will. Her lawyer will be looking over the document. He won’t allow her to sign a document different from the one we agreed on.”
“Send him one document and have her sign a different one.”
“And risk litigation? If I tried something like that, and it came to light, I’d lose my job. I could go to jail.”
“You’re going to lose your job anyway. I’m going to pull every loan I have with your bank and I’m going to make sure your boss knows I’ve done so because of you.”
The threat met with silence. Good. Think about it, you cowardly little prick.
“And I’ll tell my boss exactly what you wanted me to do. Bankers talk, Mr. Cross. You’ll pay hell getting another loan anywhere local. I’m done with this.”
The phone clicked in Will’s ear. For five seconds he was able to control his frustration, then he beat the phone on the desk. Semi-circular impressions gouged into the wood. The cordless receiver broke in two and part of it flew half way across the room to ricochet off the wall onto the floor. The sight of the damage he’d wrought jacked his rage up a notch. This was all Sam’s fault, and she’d be sorry.
Will jerked his cell phone from his pocket, thumbed down until he found the number he needed and punched it.
“Zusak.”
“Tell me you found something on that son of a bitch sniffing around my wife,” he demanded.
“I’ve hit a wall, but I’ve put one of my best tech guys on chipping away at it. The info we’ve uncovered thus far is sketchy. I should be able to tell you something by tomorrow or the next day.”
Will nodded to himself. Knowing someone was actually accomplishing something he needed done eased back the impatience burning through him. “Good. I knew I could count on you.”
CHAPTER 32
Sam listened to Tim’s steady breathing and glanced at the clock. He’d be waking any moment to leave before Joy woke. How did he do that? It was as if he had an alarm clock in his head.
For the last two weeks they’d spent every free moment together. And made love often. She had never known what it was to be hungry for a man’s touch. To long for moments of intimacy. And to want to rush Joy to bed so they could be alone.
Sex in the past had been something to avoid or endure. Will’s needs and demands had dominated that part of their relationship as much as the rest, leaving her only brief moments of pleasure. Her thoughts skated away from even thinking about the last few months of their marriage, when his drive to have a son had superseded everything else.
She shut down the memories and pressed closer to Tim, soaking in the feeling of security she felt lying next to him. Tim was the complete opposite of Will. Patient and persistent, he seemed to know just where to touch her to make her feel as though every nerve in her body came alive.
Her love for him deepened her responses. Left her as vulnerable to him emotionally as she’d ever been physically to Will. In the last two weeks she’d reveled in their closeness, but there had been moments of fear mixed in. What if something happened to end this? Just the thought squeezed her heart and made it difficult for her to breathe. Joy loved Tim as much as she did. He offered Joy all the affection and attention Will hadn’t. She would be just as devastated.
And Tim loved them. She saw it in the tenderness and care he showed Joy, the passion he had for her. She had to set aside this fear and just enjoy being with him. And hope Will continued to stay away.
“What are you thinking about?” His voice, gravely with sleep, broke into her thoughts.
“How I wish you didn’t have to sneak away so Joy wouldn’t see you in my bed.”
She turned her lips against his chest and slid her hand down over his stomach in a slow deliberate quest for what lay beneath the sheets. By the time her fingers closed around him, he was already hard in anticipation of her touch.
Tim’s heated gaze tripped her heartbeat into thunder mode. They were so lucky to have found each other. A wave of tenderness and love rolled over her. When she bent her head to place an open mouthed kiss on his chest, she felt his quick, indrawn breath. Encouraged by his response, she found one of his flat nipples and laved it, then sucked. His erection hardened in her hand. She rained kisses down the center of his stomach as she continued to caress him, up and down. His stomach muscles tensed beneath the gentle nip of her teeth.
“Sam,” he whispered, his voice a voice husky, his fingers tangling in her hair.
When her mouth closed over him, he made a strangled sound of pleasure that made her hum in satisfaction. There was power in giving him pleasure. Each time she shared herself with him, it made her stronger.
“I’m not going to be a damn bit of use to you, if you don’t stop,” his voice was rough.
It was so arousing, knowing how she could drive him as quickly over the edge as he did her. She straddled his hips and lowered herself over him.
His hips jerked in reaction, deepening the contact. “Jesus, you feel so perfect, Sam.” He ran his hand from her hips and up her back, drawing her down for a long, deep kiss.
She captured a slow, intense rhythm, tilting her hips and taking him deep with each movement. I love you. The words lay there between them with every movement of their bodies, every shared caress of their hands and lips. All too quickly fulfillment overtook her with a sweet, sweeping pleasure that left her gasping. Tim’s climax followed and triggered a renewed need for more.
The words still lay there between them as they looked into each other’s eyes. And when he said them aloud, she stopped breathing for a moment.
“I love you,” he said again.
She leaned down to rub her cheek against his beard, then turned her lips against his, “I love you, too.”
Flash pulled the car in front of the house. They’d spent the morning at the Springs Preserve, walking through the museum, the exterior displays of flora and fauna, then caught a movie after lunch. It had been a perfect family day. He’d even enjoyed the movie about cartoon cars.
But regret and worry had plagued him all day. The more time he spent with Sam and Joy, the harder it was to tell Sam about the trouble he knew was coming. He could feel it. He’d already begun to look over his shoulder, regularly check the rear view mirror, and check the computer monitor and doors at night. Every day he remained here, he put the two most important people in his life in danger.
For the last week he’d spent every moment he could with them. It was selfish and short-sighted, but the time he had with them would give him something to hold on to when he was either in jail or back on his team.
Those thoughts were more than selfish. Now that he had said the words and she had too, it had made it even more real. What would it do to her when he was gone? What would it do to Joy?
Maybe he could ask Sam to leave with him, but she’d struggled so hard to keep the house. It was home to her. Once he’d told her the truth, she’d want him as far away from her and Joy as he could get.
And it would kill him.
He couldn’t just disappear like he’d done before. He couldn’t leave her wondering what had happened to him, as he had with nearly everyone else in his life. Like his team. Why hadn’t he run to them, instead of away? He believed he’d put his experience in juvie behind him, but he hadn’t. The abuse dealt to him by the older boys, the barred windows, and locked
doors. He’d die in jail. But he couldn’t run again. He couldn’t bring himself to leave Sam and Joy. And if there was a single chance he could walk away from this and still have Sam and Joy in his life, he had to take it.
“My legs are all wobbly mommy. I’m tired,” Joy whined from the back seat.
“I’ll get her,” Flash said, exiting the car.
Once he’d released her from her booster seat, Joy slipped her arms around his neck and attached herself to him like a spider monkey. He gave her small body a hug and tucked his arm beneath her bottom.
Sam ran up the three steps to unlock the front door. Joy lay against his shoulder and Flash rested a hand against her back to hold her in place as he side-stepped past Sam into the house.
Joy’s arms tightened around his neck and she snuggled close. “Are we going to have chow?”
“What kind of chow do you want, sweet tart?” He rubbed her back and breathed in her kid smell of outdoors and cherry Kool-Aid.
“Nuggets.”
“You’re going to turn into a nugget. In fact, I think I see a brown crunchy spot right there on your arm. I’ll nibble it off.” He pretended to gnaw her arm, making noises like Tasmanian Devil.
Joy squealed and wiggled in his arms. He swung her down and laid her on the couch. Joy grinned. “Your beard tickles, Mr. Tim.”
“So I’ve been told.” Flash looked up at Sam and grinned. She wagged a finger at him and soft color rushed to her cheeks.
“I’ll heat up your nuggets left over from lunch, Joy,” she said.
“’Kay. Play Barbie with me, Mr. Tim,” she begged.
“Uh…”
Sam disappeared behind the dividing wall between the kitchen and living room, but it did nothing to muffle her laughter.
Joy wiggled off the couch and ran to the large pink Barbie house that sat in its place of honor in front of the fireplace. She jerked a male doll out of one of the rooms and hustled back to him with it.
Unable to think of any way out of it, Flash took a seat on the rug in front of the dollhouse. And for the longest ten minutes of his life he played Ken to Joy’s Barbie. He dressed the naked doll in the bathing suit and shirt Joy handed him, and pushed him around in a pink convertible he thought did nothing for the dude’s image.
Breaking Away (Military Romantic Suspense) (Book 3 of the SEAL TEAM Heartbreakers) Page 29