by N. M. Silber
“Yeah, he’s my ex and he’s harassing me.” She shot an angry glance at my client, who flinched and hung his head. I had a feeling that this was a lovers’ spat turned into criminal case, which was probably why Adam seemed so unmotivated to impress Big Red up there.
“What do you mean by that?” Adam asked, sounding like he could care less.
“I mean whenever I see him out he says nasty things to me. He calls me names.”
“What kind of names does he call you?”
“Nasty ones.” She pouted and shot another unfriendly look at my client. I was waiting for her to stick her tongue out at him. What grade was she in?
“What kind of nasty ones?” Adam asked, actually starting to sound irritated.
“He called me a shallow b-i-t-c-h!” She sneered at my client like she thought he was lower than a piece of dirt. I couldn’t imagine why anyone would call her a nasty name. She was a real sweetie pie. Who in the hell was she spelling for, anyway? The stenographer?
“He called you a bitch?” Adam asked just a little too sarcastically, proving that he could, in fact, spell. I actually winced. Ms. Robbins obviously didn’t pick up on the fact that he wasn’t really being sympathetic, though. She was a smart one too!
“Yeah! Can you believe that! And he’s one to criticize anybody! He’s got a beer gut!” I had to admit that I didn’t really see the connection between having a beer gut and being a bitch, or the relevance for that matter, but no way was I going to object and cut this off! I expected Adam to get her quieted down but instead he egged her on!
“And he’s calling you names?” What the fuck was he doing?! Was he nuts? I looked up at Judge Channing, who was starting to give Adam some very angry looks. Then the judge gave me angry looks for not objecting. I just smiled.
“I know! Seriously! You know, he doesn’t have a decent job either. He’s a stock boy at a supermarket! And he doesn’t even have a car! I don’t know why I wasted my time with him!”
“She’s right!” My client yelled out. “I am a loser!” Oh shit! I knew that it was going too well. I started trying to get him to shut up, but of course, he wasn’t going to listen. “I never deserved her and since she left me I’ve been a broken man!”
“Well, Goddamn, Tony!” Ms. Robbins responded. “If you would just spend less money on pizza and beer you could save up to buy some kind of vehicle!”
“I would go without food if it meant you would give me another chance, Vera!”
“Be a man, for crying out loud!” She appeared to be thinking about it, though. The rest of us all just kind of hung out, since it didn’t seem like we were needed for anything.
“I’m begging you, Vera!” My client actually dove out of his chair and kneeled down on the floor. I put my head down on the defense table and banged it a few times. Suddenly, some guy in the crowd yelled out:
“Take him back, Vera! The man’s a mess!”
“Why does he want her back? She really is a b-i-t-c-h!” A female voice from among the spectators chimed in.
“Order! I want order in this courtroom!” Judge Channing yelled, banging his gavel, looking apoplectic. “This is a court of law, not daytime television! Mr. Roth, Ms. Ginsberg, I suggest that you work this case out between you and get it out of my courtroom!”
You know, I would just like to point out for the record that I didn’t bring this case; I didn’t put that woman on the witness stand, and I didn’t tell my client to act like an asshole. Yet, for some reason, I was being yelled at. Sometimes I just loved my job. Judge Channing basically kicked us out of the courtroom at that point so I grabbed my stuff and met Adam outside where he was waiting with Braden. Jess had already gone back to the office. She would be so sorry that she missed this very special episode of Dr. Phil.
“So, tell me, Adam,” I said with a smile, “when you were at law school dreaming about bringing justice to those who had been wronged, did you imagine Vera?”
“Stick around, Braden, you might be needed to defend your fiancée’s life,” he said in a deadly voice. He actually looked rather homicidal at the moment, if I must say so myself.
“What? You can dish it out but you can’t take it? Well, don’t blame me for this bullshit case, counselor. So is Vera going to take Tony back or not?” I asked impatiently.
“Who the fuck knows?” Adam bit out. “Who the fuck cares? I’m withdrawing the charges.” He sounded really angry. In fact, I didn’t think I had ever seen him this angry. He had been really cranky in general lately though.
“All right then. Thank you,” I said, trying to placate him a little. I wondered if something was up with him. I said goodbye to Braden and headed out.
It was nearly Labor Day, and as I made my way back to my office, I thought about all that had happened in the month and a half since Braden had officially proposed. Even though we still had two different apartments we spent every night together. We would pick up Bruno, grab some take-out and go home to relax and have dinner. We would talk, play with our dog, watch PBS and usually make love. It was very domestic and very nice. As we predicted, our parents were thrilled about our engagement but did recommend we not rush the wedding. That was fine by us. We hadn’t even really discussed a date. Actually, we really hadn’t discussed any details. We were just happy being together at the moment.
The only bump in the road was the fact that we still sometimes felt like somebody was following us. Braden had felt it too a few times, so it wasn’t just me. We did tell the police about our mysterious shadow but since the information was so tenuous there really wasn’t much they could do. So every now and then my neck felt prickly and it just felt like someone was watching. A couple of times I even thought that I had seen an actual shadow around a corner that made me feel suspicious but at least there had been no more notes or paper products on our doorstep and nobody seemed particularly worried that our parents had met and gotten along fabulously.
When I got back to the office, Jess was still out but Cameron was there. I sensed immediately that he wanted to talk about something. He looked up like he had been waiting for me to come back. I tossed my briefcase on the floor and, thankfully, it didn’t crash through to the floor below despite the fact that it weighed three tons.
“So, what’s up, Cam?” I asked, spinning my desk chair to face him, opening up the bottom drawer of my desk and putting my feet up. I folded my hands on my lap and tilted my head to the side. I was in my “I’m listening” pose.
“I’m going to be going back to my firm,” he answered, turning toward me. “The thing is, that I like criminal law so my dad is giving me the opportunity to coordinate their pro bono program if I want to. I would take our associates and teach them how to do preliminary hearings and I would schedule them and supervise them.”
“That sounds great! You’ll get to do something you like and stay with your firm. I know that your great-grandfather was a founding partner and everything.”
“Yeah, even though it’s a two hundred lawyer firm it’s still pretty much the family business. Anyway, since I’ll probably be leaving soon, I was thinking, I might ask Jessica to have a drink with me after work if she’s free.”
“She’s free!” I sat up so quickly that I went flying out of the chair but because one heel caught on the drawer, I wound up in a heap on the floor. I got up quickly and straightened my skirt, glaring at my chair like it had been a mechanical malfunction.
“Are you okay?” he asked, rising to see if I needed help.
“Oh, yeah, I’m good. Uh, what I meant was that she’s probably free. If she’s not, you, know, busy.” Brilliant! I was smiling and nodding like a bobble-head doll.
“Okay! Great!” He smiled and turned back to his work, probably thanking the good Lord that Braden had been the lucky guy to snag me. Why was I so freaking awkward? Later that day Jess stopped me in the hall.
“Cameron asked me if I would go out for a drink after work with him,” she said in a quiet voice, sounding very excited. I so wante
d to make a girlie SQUEE noise but I managed to control myself. I looked around quickly to make sure that we weren’t being overheard. Although, I’m not really sure why.
“Okay, I’m going to need a debriefing. Braden and I will stay at our apartment tonight instead of at his. You can tell me about it then.”
“I can’t tell you with Braden there! It’s a girl talk thing!” she objected, looking up and down the hallway nervously, toward our office.
“I’ll make him go in the bedroom and wait for me.”
“You’re going to lock your fiancé away in your bedroom?” she asked giving me a look somewhere between amused and incredulous.
“I’ll crack a window and make sure he has food and water. Besides, I’ve got a TV in there and Bruno will keep him company.”
“Okay. We’re going to O’Malley’s. I’m not sure when I’ll be home but it probably won’t be late. I’m not getting my hopes up though. We’ve gone out before and nothing has happened.”
“I have a feeling this is different. He mentioned going back to his firm so he may realize that it’s time to act.”
“I’ll meet you in the ladies’ room at five minutes to six so you can reassure me that I don’t look haggardly.”
“I’ll be there!” We went our separate ways and I tried to look casual. Although nobody was actually in the hallway so it probably didn’t matter.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
I met Jess in the ladies’ room at the designated time and did a stall check to make sure we were alone. I made sure to open every door in case anyone was standing on the toilet. You never know. People are weird. I was getting much better at this covert stuff.
“You look great,” I told her as soon as I was done. “Not in the least bit haggardly.”
“It’s just drinks. So I’m not going to worry about the fact that I haven’t shaved my legs in two days and I’m wearing underwear that comes up to my chin.”
“There’ll be alcohol involved. It’s going to be fine. Tell me everything when you get home. If you get home.”
“I’ll get home. We have court tomorrow!”
“Okay, remember what you told me.”
“Never trust a guy who brings a roll of quarters on a date?”
“No! It’s okay to want him to bang you until you can’t walk straight.”
“I never told you that.” She looked confused.
“Oh, I must have imagined it. Anyway, good luck!” I patted her on the back. She gave me a slightly baffled look, shook her head and left to go back to our office. We heard Cam and Braden talking as we got closer and we gave each other a silent nod. It was Go Time. We walked into that office like we were walking the catwalk in Paris. At least Jess did. I accidently slammed my shoulder in the doorframe but I recovered quickly.
“Hey gorgeous,” Braden said, making me feel all fluttery as usual. “Are you okay?” He winced.
“I’m good! No worries! Hey Jess, look there’s a sexy guy sitting in my chair.” I was so glad that he hadn’t seen the incident with the chair earlier.
“Hello, Braden. She’s all yours. Are you ready to go, Cam?” she asked with a smile. How did she manage to be so cool like that?
“I am. See you tomorrow, Gabrielle. Talk to you soon, Braden.” With that the two of them left to go have drinks. I watched them walk down the hall together and get on the elevator then I turned back to Braden.
“Are you happy now?” he asked, getting up and coming over to put one arm around my waist and gently rub my injured shoulder with the other. He looked down at me with a smile.
“What do you mean?” I asked innocently.
“You wanted them to get together, didn’t you? You’ve certainly had them on enough stakeouts together looking for our shadow.” I couldn’t hide anything from this man anymore.
“Yes, I want them to get together because I know that they’re attracted to each other and they have fun together. I think they would make a great couple but I’m not positive that anything will happen just because he asked her out for drinks. They’ve gone out for drinks before and nothing did.”
“I’ll let you in on a little family secret. Cameron does more soul searching than fucking Hamlet, but he’s finally done dicking around. He’s going to ask her out this time.” I had definitely wound up with the right cousin for me. I didn’t have Jess’s patience.
“He is? That’s great!” I looked up at him with barely contained excitement. “She’ll be so happy! They really do make a nice couple. And then you won’t worry anymore!”
“Gabrielle.” He gave me a look that seemed like a combination of amusement and affection. “I haven’t been worried in quite a while. You and I belong together and nobody’s going to get in the way of that.” He pushed a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. “I suppose you want us to stay at your place tonight so you can hear all about it when she gets home?”
“You know me so well.”
“I know you intimately,” he said with a naughty look, squeezing my bottom. There was a reason I kept him locked in my bedroom, you know.
That evening I finally convinced Braden to watch the first couple of episodes of Downton Abbey with me. I owned all the previous seasons so far. Even though he was kind of grumbly at first he actually started getting into it.
“You know, you’re right, this show’s pretty good.”
“I knew you would like it! It’s kind of hot too, all that repressed sexuality.”
“Yeah, maybe we should play rakish aristocrat and sexually curious daughter of a wealthy landowner,” he joked, and raised his eyebrows provocatively.
“Braden, we play that all the time. That’s us you’re describing.”
“Oh yeah.” He laughed. I heard the front door open. Bruno raised his head and yipped.
“Don’t worry, Bruno, it’s just Jess. Now Mommy’s going into the other room to beat information out of her, so you hang out with Daddy.”
“I’m going to read. Is that okay or do you want me to leave the TV on?” Braden asked tactfully.
“No, honey. We’ll be in the next room. Do whatever you want and I’ll be back shortly.”
I went out to get the scoop. Cool collected Jess was gone. This Jess was so happy that she was almost vibrating. Immediately, easily excitable Gabrielle showed up to keep her company.
“Gabrielle! He asked me out!” She looked like she wanted to jump up and down. Hell, I wanted to jump up and down. And I was home now and no longer wearing heels. So I did! I jumped! Up and down!
“Tell me everything!” I demanded, grabbing her by the arms and shaking her as I hopped up and down like a crazed bunny rabbit.
“Okay, stop assaulting me and sit down,” she instructed. We went over and threw ourselves down into a couple of armchairs and sat forward in full attention information sharing poses.
“Tell me what he said word for word or I’ll have to hurt you.”
“Okay, he told me that he found me very attractive and that he felt like the two of us had a lot of chemistry,” she began.
“Yes!” I interrupted her and pumped my fist in the air. Then I rubbed my shoulder, because it was still kind of sore from the door thing already and I might have just dislocated it.
“He said that at first he worried that if it didn’t work out he would wind up making you and Braden all pissed off at him again because you and I are such good friends but that now he was pretty sure that it would work out!”
“Oh Jess! That’s so great! I’m getting all verklempt,” I said, feeling teary-eyed. I loved it when a plan came together.
“I don’t know what that means,” she said.
“Don’t worry about it. Neither do most people who aren’t Jewish and over the age of sixty. Just keep talking.”
“Um, he also admitted that at first he was jealous of Braden being with you. He realized, though, as time went on that the two of you were developing really deep feelings for each other and you just seemed right together. He’s been thinking about asking m
e out for a while.”
“Oh Jess! I’m so happy!” I gushed.
“Me too!” she squealed.
“Me too!” Braden called out from the other room. “The walls are really thin in here, by the way.” Bruno yipped in agreement.
Drew had gone back to D.C. to finish his last year of law school but Beth, who lived with her parents and worked at the art museum, was still around. She and Lily, both being artistic had hit it off particularly well. Beth was a painter and she was really talented. Lily encouraged her to enter her work in various art shows and Beth encouraged Lily to do more author events. We also frequently had a girls’ night with all four of us on Sunday while the guys were doing Game Night, which was exactly what we were doing at that moment.
“What’s the status with the big engagement party?” Lily asked.
“Our parents are making a formal announcement this week and then invitations will go out. It’s going to be in the Grand Ballroom of the Ritz-Carlton,” I answered, feeling a little queasy, which didn’t stop me from loading up a Triscuit with port wine cheese.
“Wow that should be quite a guest list,” Jess said. “Senators and CEO’s.” She popped the cork on a bottle of Chianti and filled all of our glasses.
“You know, Braden and I are actually allowed to invite our friends too,” I pointed out.
“I’ll bet the media will all be picking it up,” Lily, who was sitting on the floor, pointed out, popping a grape into her mouth.
“Great. Maybe they can capture me tripping down a flight of stairs or making a corny joke to a national leader.” What was I going to do with no cat, no kid, and no laundry?
“Braden will make sure everything’s okay, Gabrielle. He’s used to stuff like this.” Beth was such a sweet person. I was really going to like having her as a sister-in-law, and having grown up with Drew, I probably wouldn’t even embarrass her much.
“Does he get engaged a lot?” Lily joked.