by Jayne Rylon
Cher’s parts popped out of him in falsetto.
If Brielle had been awake, she would have cracked up with him.
Music and laughter were two things she’d never had in her life. Not during the dark period she lay trapped in now. Please don’t let me be wrong about this. She was suffering every second he wasted.
If his approach bombed, Becca and Kurt would consider him certifiable instead of certified.
By the time he got to the second verse, she’d settled enough for Becca to approach cautiously. No women had occupied her world since her mother died.
“Talk to her,” he whispered just before he kicked into the refrain.
“She can hear you,” Kurt called in a more reasonable tone from the other room. “It’s working.”
On the next go-around, he substituted Cookie for Babe.
A gasp big enough to suck all the air from the room inflated Brielle’s chest. She bolted upright, tearing from his hold and scrambling across the mattress until her back slammed into the wall. Her chest rose and fell at an alarming rate.
Luke didn’t abandon the song, though he nearly choked on the lyrics and the misery radiating from her as if it leaked from every pore.
“It’s okay, Brielle.” Becca layered on her voice. “You’re all right. We’ve got you. Luke is right here. Can you hear him singing to you? Listen to him.”
Brielle’s lids fluttered open. Her stare locked on him immediately. “Luke?”
“Hi.” He kept humming as he inched closer to her, crawling onto the mattress. When she didn’t flinch, he reached for her. The instant his fingertips grazed her shoulder she launched herself into his arms. “I’ve got you.”
“I’ve got you, Cookie.” A hiccup interrupted the line when she parroted the song back to him. “What made you pick that?”
“It worked for Phil Connors in Ground Hog Day.” He shrugged.
Brielle blinked up at him several times then burst into a fit of blended sobs and giggles.
“Oh, damn.” He rocked her against his chest. “Please tell me this isn’t what you’re living through every night. All our talks today triggered some bad memories, right?”
No affirmation came from her. Instead, she burrowed closer and began to tremble.
“No more.” Cradling her in his arms, he swayed to the melody still ringing in his mind. “I’ve got you and I’m not letting go. Not tonight. Not ever.”
Kurt approached slowly. “I think you might need to, just for a little while. You and Becca should watch the recordings. It was my turn to monitor her. The upgrades to the Dream Machine translate the waves with a delay of just a couple minutes. I saw it all as it happened.”
“And you didn’t wake us sooner? You fucker.” Luke might have thrown a punch if he hadn’t had such precious cargo. “You let her suffer.”
“We needed answers—fast, thorough, accurate. That’s the point of the Dream Machine. It shaves months, or even years, off treatment times. Now we have critical information. One more replay was better than sending her home to live it over and over. Every night. Just like this, except alone.” He frowned. “Brielle, you left out some pretty important parts of your story earlier today. We can’t help you if you don’t share everything.”
“I couldn’t.” She clutched Luke’s back. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s too much for her, Kurt.” Becca shook her head, taking Luke’s side. “There’s no rush. We’re pushing her too hard.”
“You haven’t seen it. You don’t understand.” Kurt began to pry Luke from Brielle.
“Don’t leave me,” she cried. “Please.”
“Take your hands off of us, right now,” Luke growled at Kurt.
The other man relented, finally kneeling on the floor beside them so he could speak to Brielle directly. “You’ve come this far. Don’t falter at the last step. Your fears are unfounded. I swear to you, I know Luke better than he knows himself, I think. He’s not going to run. He’ll give you what you need. Your ex fucked this all up. He didn’t understand like we do. Or he didn’t care to help you.”
“What are you talking about?” Luke squinted at his best friend.
“Go watch for yourself.” He jerked his chin toward the other room. “I’ll stay here with your Cookie. Take Becca. Go.”
“Is that okay with you, Brielle?” She still cowered in his hold. He hated seeing her so afraid. Maybe Kurt was right again. If they could stop this here and now, they should.
“This is why you asked us to help, Luke.” Becca patted his knee. “Trust Kurt. He’s neutral in this. Objective. You know he has your best interests at heart too. Come on, let’s watch the dream sequence.”
“Brielle?” Trying to meet her gaze was impossible when she stared at the floor.
“I’m afraid, Luke,” she confessed.
“I know.” He hugged her again.
“Anyone reasonable would have been scared of that slime bucket.” Kurt peeled one of her hands from Luke’s back. “That’s a completely normal response. If you hadn’t been frightened, that would have concerned me.”
Becca met her husband’s stare. “I’m going. Luke, are you with me?”
“Brielle?” he asked again.
“It will change how you see me.” She sniffled. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“If he cut out because of that, he wouldn’t be worth keeping,” Kurt interrupted before Luke could find the right words. “You deserve someone who loves all of you.”
A challenge like that couldn’t go untaken. Luke pulled away a bit to kiss her forehead. “I want to see, Brielle. To show you it doesn’t matter to me. You matter, and I l-like you the way you are.”
Kurt lifted a brow at his stumble.
This wasn’t the time to drop another bomb on her.
“I’ll be right back, Brielle,” he promised. “Do you want Kurt to hold you while I’m gone?”
“Is that a trick question?” she asked.
“Hell no.” Luke frowned. “I’m not trying to trap you. I only want you to be as comfortable as possible.”
“Do you mind?” She peeked at Kurt over her shoulder.
“Hanging on to a pretty lady?” He smiled. “Never could get tired of that.”
Kurt slid onto the mattress, propping his shoulders on the wall. He held his hands out and Luke lifted Brielle, passing her to his best friend. She instantly curled against him, resting her head on his shoulder.
The fire burning in his eyes had to have warmed the chill her nightmares put in her heart.
“There you go, Cookie.” Luke stroked her hair a few times, all the way to where it dangled above the small of her back. “I’ll be quick.”
He glanced at her when he was a few steps away, then strode back to kiss her cheek before steeling himself to watch whatever it was that disturbed her so greatly.
Night after night.
“You’re doing great, Brielle.” Becca added her reassurance before leaving the room. “Will it bother you if I close the door?”
“Not at all.” She was surprised to find it was true. Her phobia usually peaked after a particularly vivid nightmare. Maybe it was the change of scenery or being in such great company, but something was different about tonight.
As soon as the door shut, Kurt took advantage of their alone time.
“Here, let’s take these off.” He peeled the transmitters from her neck, chest and wrist then averted his gaze when she shimmied out of his devious contraption and placed it in the bin beside the bed.
“There, better?”
She nodded.
“Get ready. When Luke comes back in this room, he’s going to be furious.” He advised her. “Not at you, Brielle. Don’t ever get those things confused, okay? He’s going to be pissed off for you. Big difference.”
“Did I bring that on myself?” She hated that she had to ask. Talking to the most practical person of the bunch helped, though. He wouldn’t bullshit her or spare her feelings.
“Of course not, and I
amend my earlier estimate of how much Luke stands to gain tonight.” He wrapped his hand around her wrist and held on. “You’re meant for each other. I bet you he doesn’t even recognize right away that part of your disturbance from the dream is the curiosity you expressed about bondage, and what effect that might have had on Brad’s treatment of you. To Luke, desires like those come standard.”
“And you?” She figured, what the hell, she didn’t need to be the only one with secrets on display. “Becca?”
“We play that way too.” He studied her as if hunting for signs of confusion or disgust. It would be better to know that now, before Luke returned, she assumed. “Frankly, there’s a reason you picked the closet as your safe place, before your dad’s death stole that comfort from you. Your ex used that terror to mold you into what he wanted. A slave. That isn’t what BDSM is about. Not in the least.
“A fundamental part of you still craves that experience. My gut says some of the desire is because you really need someone you can trust that completely, especially after a lifetime of disappointment in the people who should have protected you. Those deficits shaped you into the person I’ve gotten to know. Part of it is more basic. It’s in your nature. Your instinct has always been to seek comfort through focusing internally. Bondage and, to a greater extent, sadism facilitates that process for a lot of people. Becca is like that. It’s not my story to share. Ask her. She’ll tell you why she loves to be tied down more than most anything else we do together.”
“Oh. O-okay,” she stuttered, wondering to what extent her new friends dabbled in the forbidden desires she’d tried desperately to erase from her list of cravings. Unsuccessfully.
Why hadn’t she had someone like him or Luke to help her understand instead of Brad’s manipulative attacks?
An enormous bang rattled the wall that separated them from the laboratory. A clatter of what sounded like metal instruments bouncing off the tile floor followed. The noise had Brielle jumping in Kurt’s hold.
“I hope that wasn’t anything irreplaceable.” He shook his head. “Our boy Luke hardly ever loses his temper. But when he does…look out. It’ll blow over quick, though. Just remember, he’s not mad at you. And he would never hurt you. I wouldn’t have sent my wife in there with him if I had any doubt about that. He’s not like the men you’ve known before.”
“He’s not mad at me.” Maybe if she repeated it a few hundred times, she might believe it.
The door between the two rooms flew open, banging into the wall. Becca cried out in the background. “Calm down, Luke. She’s already pumped full of adrenaline. Don’t scare her again.”
His chest heaved as he looked directly into her eyes. He didn’t shout, or even raise his voice. The deadly cold chilled her more than if he had. “Where is that motherfucker? I want him in jail. Or dead.”
“I have no idea.” She shrugged. “I’m sorry I fibbed to you about him kicking me out. I just wasn’t ready… After that night, when he trapped me in the closet, I knew we’d crossed a line. When I finally got up the nerve to leave it was too late for anything like calling the police. I didn’t want to give him a chance to change my mind or twist things around…or worse. I waited until he was out with his new girlfriend, the one he said he started cheating on me with when he realized how fucked up I really am. You know, for wanting to be restrained. I packed my suitcase with some clothes and a couple books and I took off.
“I never looked back. At least not for a few months. And when I finally decided the shelter was right, I should report what had happened—what if he does the same, or worse, to the new girl—our house was empty. I think he must have moved in with her. I know he was behind on bills. He abandoned the place, just like my dad.”
“Let it go, Luke.” Kurt held her tighter when his friend staggered near. “Only one of those two people has any place in your future. Do right by her. She’s who’s important.”
“He hurt you.” All the golden warmth drained from his face, leaving his tan skin a ghastly shade of gray. “I saw what he did. How he manhandled you. How you injured yourself trying to escape. You broke your hand.”
“I didn’t go to the doctor. It might have been nothing.” She tried not to flex the knuckles that still ached when she lifted something heavy.
The stormy blue of his eyes misted over. “And you’re wearing bruises again tonight. I should have protected you better. We have to find him before he finds you.”
She shivered. “I assumed he was out of my life.”
“He is,” Kurt cut in, stopping Luke from frightening her with the what-ifs of his overprotective nature. He spit out the rest of his words. “And you aren’t responsible for Wexford. If anyone should take blame for him, it’s me. I left the door unlocked the night he broke into the lab. I started it all.”
“And if you hadn’t, none of us would be standing here today.” Becca maintained her professionalism best of all three of the doctors. “This is a difficult case. We’re all involved, no matter how much we think we’re not. Everyone’s emotions are in play. I think we should call it a night. We can regroup in the morning to discuss the dream sequences and what our next steps will be. I think this has been a huge unlock for Brielle. It will only get easier from here.”
Becca stepped behind Luke. She ran her hands down his arms and unfisted his hands, finger by finger. “She needs you to love her, not fight her.”
Maybe he wasn’t interested. Did some of his anger stem from disappointment? Brielle might not be what he was looking for. He said himself he wasn’t interested in his old pursuits these days. This could be a part of his life he was hoping to leave behind. And here she was, bringing it into play. Because Kurt was right. It was time to admit some of these yearnings she had for bondage—he’d called it—were ingrained.
If Luke couldn’t help her, she’d find someone who could. No matter how badly that hurt. She’d spent enough time in the shadows, hiding.
Damn Becca. A perceptive woman, and maybe one who’d shared Brielle’s concerns at some point, it was as if she’d read Brielle’s mind like an open book. “Dig beneath the rage, Luke. Tell her what the rest of her dream did to you. She needs to hear that you’re turned on by it.”
“What sick fuck would get hot looking at any part of that nightmare?” His question was tormented.
“Obviously, you.” Becca shifted her hands lower and toward the center of his body. When she cupped his crotch, his breath caught. “And her. I saw the readings from the probe, Brielle. I can understand how conflicted you must be when you want something similar and yet a galaxy away from what your ex did to you. You need someone to show you the difference between safe, sane and consensual and…that.”
She had everyone’s attention now.
“I stand by what I said.” Becca took her hands from Luke and strode a few feet deeper into the space until she could look at each one of them in turn. “We’re done for tonight. There’s a lot to digest. But in the morning, I’d like to suggest a demonstration.”
Kurt’s whole body went rigid beneath Brielle. Including his cock. She shifted away, a little embarrassed.
“Sorry, honey.” He chuckled. “I think I see where my wife is going with this. She’s pure mastermind. Nothing makes me hornier than a smart woman.”
Luke staggered to the bed and collapsed on the other end. He held out his arms to her. “Come here, Cookie. If you want to.”
Brielle didn’t hesitate a single second. She kissed Kurt’s cheek, whispered, “Thank you,” then launched herself at Luke.
He caught her easily, bundling her to his chest. “I’m so sorry you had to go through any of that, never mind all of it.”
“I’m just glad I have you on my side now.” She glanced away from his eyes to Becca and Kurt. “All of you.”
Becca nodded. “You do. And that’s why I’m going to propose something outrageous.”
Brielle held her breath.
“I want you and Luke to watch Kurt and me together.” If she blu
shed a tiny bit, no one called her on it.
Kurt stalked to his wife, his entire bearing different in an instant. He stood straighter, taller. When he lifted her chin up, he demanded her attention. She gladly gave it. “You’d like to have a formal session? In my laboratory? With your patient observing?”
“Yes, Doctor.” The dynamic between them had completely transformed.
Brielle’s jaw hung open when Becca went to her knees, bowed her head and folded her arms behind her back. “Will you dominate me tomorrow, first thing?”
“Maybe all day if you’re lucky.” Kurt nudged her jaw until she peered into his eyes. “I love you, Becca. For being willing to help, however you can. Even if it’s deeply personal and makes you vulnerable. A year ago you wouldn’t have been able to expose yourself like this. I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you, Doctor.” She nuzzled Kurt’s hand. “It’s all because of you. You’ve earned my trust. Just like Luke will with Brielle.”
Kurt shocked them all when he joined his wife on his knees on the floor of the room where it had all begun. “You’re everything to me, Becca.”
Brielle leaned forward when the two doctors kissed. She caught hints of tongue mixed in with the tender locking of their lips. When Becca tried to tug her husband closer, he captured her wrists, broke their exchange and tsked. “Don’t get carried away, baby. It’s only a couple hours until dawn.”
“You plan to get up early, right?” Becca looked to Luke and Brielle with wide eyes.
“It’s your call.” Luke chuckled at her earnest entreaty. “How does eight sound?”
“A lifetime away.” She groaned as she and Kurt climbed to their feet, hands still linked. “I think we’d better leave you two to rest up. There’ll be no more Dream Machine tonight. Can you sleep here? The couch in Kurt’s office is plenty big enough for us both. I mean, not that I would know.”
Kurt smacked his wife on the ass. “Liars get spanked, don’t they?”
“Promise?” A grin developed at the edges of her smile and worked its way inward. “My husband has a small penis. He never pleases me in bed…”