He clenched his hands around her hips and hung on tight so she couldn’t get away again. She didn’t fight him, but she’d turned herself off, trying to tune him out.
“Opposites attract.” He grasped at all he had. “There’s a reason for that. The strengths of one, balance out the weaknesses of the other, so that together, two imperfect people become one perfect unit.”
“You don’t get to read my journal, and then throw my own words back at me,” she said.
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you can’t.”
“I just did.”
“Yeah, you did, but Paul, you’re not supposed to go around, reading people’s private thoughts, and then use them as ammunition.”
“Since when do I follow standard guidelines of appropriate practice?” He tilted his head and raised a brow. “You know me better than anyone.”
She stared at him while she, he thought, tried to come up with a retort.
“But you love me anyway,” he beat her to it. “For some reason.”
She covered her face with both hands. His cockiness dissolved, thinking he’d made her cry again, but she massaged her temples like it was all giving her a headache.
“You can’t file for a divorce. Not yet, not right when I thought I’d just finally figured it all out.”
“What did you figure out?”
“That I, of all people, shouldn’t have put so much expectation on you—I think you’re perfect—but I got carried away with my perception. So . . . when we . . . in the dressing room . . .” He slowed down, hoping he’d stop stammering. “I thought I’d discovered you might not be perfect after all—and I felt betrayed—but I had no right to feel betrayed, because I had no right to hold you to my own perceived image, and I realize now, that what I did is the same thing I always thought my parents did to me—and I’m so, so sorry.”
“I never said I was perfect. In fact, I’m sure you can correct me if I’m wrong, but I tried to tell you many times, the opposite.”
“I know you did. I didn’t believe you, because you are as perfect as they come—I need to stop using that word.”
She studied him for a few seconds. He waited with bated breath, hoping she’d forgive him.
“You figured that out all by yourself, huh?”
“No, of course not,” he frowned. “Keene helped.”
“Keene, again.” She puckered her beautiful lips, and he tightened his grip on her, knowing he’d made her mad enough to try and bolt again.
“But that’s not all I figured out,” he rushed to plead his case, trying to sweeten the pot. “I couldn’t wait to get home to you. I had to tell you how sorry I was for the way I’ve been acting, but when I got here, I couldn’t find you, but I did find your journal. And we’ve already established that I breeched that trust, but reading what you’ve written, all the thoughts and doubts running through my mind, they all came together.
“I’d been beating myself up for ruining your life. I wanted you, I did everything in my power to keep you, and when things went to hell, because of what I thought was the result of my customary self-serving, self-indulgent, selfishness—” He sighed. “That’s a lot of self isn’t it?”
She nodded but gave him no telling expression, good or bad, to gauge what she felt at the moment.
“But as I read your life on paper, I started seeing—you know,” he said in a sing-song voice, “even though I am too self-confident, self-absorbed and self-centered, I care about you even more than myself.”
Her eyes glazed over with impatience.
“What did you see, Paul?”
“That we’re meant for each other.”
“I’ve tried to tell you that.”
“Yeah, so my gravestone will never read, ‘Here lies Paul, the most malleable man to have ever lived’.”
Rhees stifled a giggle. Paul’s talent for using arrogant, yet self-deprecating declarations to make her laugh had disarmed her once again. She usually welcomed his ability to brighten situations that felt, to her, a lot like the end of the world, but this time, she feared he might persuade her to change her mind. She believed in what she’d said about their relationship.
She studied his attractive face, considering the sincere desperation in his pleading blue eyes. In the meantime, her arms involuntarily moved around his neck again, because, she told herself, she didn’t want to drown. Her height in the water made it too dangerous not to hang on, very closely.
“Okay, so what finally made it through to that brilliant brain of yours?”
“Funny you should mention my not-so-brilliant brain, because if it were, it wouldn’t have taken me so long, but my weird brain happened to be running an analysis on the dates of your entries, and pinpointing where I was at the time you were going through all the experiences you had to go through. You wouldn’t know this, but when you started writing about how much you wished you were brave enough to learn to dive, when you found out your mom was dying, that’s when I left Florida.”
He raised a brow, expecting her to catch on, but she couldn’t see what that had to do with them now.
“That’s when I met up with Mitch, and then Ginger, and when I became a dive instructor.” The light danced around in his eyes, making them sparkle. “It’s all in the timing.” He smiled, getting excited. “Things were happening to you at the same time things were happening to me.”
“Yeah. Of course, and?”
“Let me try a new approach.” He swooped in for a quick kiss, ignoring her scolding expression. She liked it, but she wasn’t ready for him to know that.
“God looked down from heaven, saw Rhees—What’s that look for?” He raised a brow. “You didn’t know I believe in God, did you?”
“Yes, I knew.” She didn’t bat an eye, but he did, doubting her. “Almost every time you say, ‘Oh, God’, you sound like you’re actually talking to someone, not just spouting a mindless exclamation.”
He seemed to think about that, and nodded.
“And you wouldn’t talk about dragging me down to hell—I mean heck, with you.” She knew she was taking her no-swear oath a little too far, but she couldn’t help it. She loved the cute, baffled looks he always made as it took him a second to absorb, or translate, what she was saying. “Unless you’ve put some thought into going there. The other night, you sounded pretty sure you’d already been darned to heck, and I don’t think people think about that stuff if they don’t believe in Gosh.”
She kept a straight face, watching his, waiting for her reward, and as usual, he didn’t disappoint. He opened his mouth to say something, but before he got it out, he closed it again. His eyes lost focus for a second before his gaze finally turned back to her with an unamused expression.
“You sidetracked my awesome story.” He flashed a warning with his eyes, but then smiled, shaking his head. “Okay, so God said, ‘Oh, look. There’s sweet little Rhees. What am I supposed to do with her? She is so good. She is so pure and innocent; it puts her at a disadvantage. She has no idea what the world is really like. She doesn’t recognize how some people can be evil and will hurt her. Poor girl’s doomed to fall prey to every feather-mucking creepazoid on the planet’.”
“I doubt God says things like that.” She’d yet to warm up to his story. Paul ignored her.
“‘She’s defenseless, poor thing.’ And then God looked on the other side of the world and shook his head when he saw me. ‘Then there’s Paul. What am I supposed to do with him? He’s bad, very bad. He’s made just about every bad choice he could possibly make in this life, and knows too fu . . .” Paul caught himself and grinned cleverly. “‘He knows way too much about the world. If only there was a way I could give Rhees just enough of what Paul knows, to keep her safe, without corrupting her . . . too much. Hmm . . .’ God scratched his head and said, ‘T
hat idea isn’t half bad. Paul could take better care of her than any of those puds she’s been dealing with her whole life.’
“I’ve only recently—like twenty minutes ago, realized what an idiot I’ve been to think you should be with one of those stupid puds, because they’re just like you. They don’t know any more about anything than you do! How are they supposed to look out for you?”
Paul looked at her as if he expected her to answer, but she was dumbfounded, wondering where he was going with his bizarre rant.
“So that’s why God put his plan into action. He planted a seed in your pretty little head that you needed to learn to dive, even though you’re a lousy swimmer, you lived in the desert, and you were scared to death of the ocean.” He smiled, but continued before she could say anything. “Next, he planted a seed in your dad’s head that he should buy life insurance, even though your dad was against the whole idea. He did it, not knowing he was going to get sick so soon after.”
Paul kissed Rhees on the forehead because he’d mentioned the sad memory of her father.
“But at the same time, he planted a seed in my head . . .” Paul noticed Rhees’ eyebrow shoot up. “I know. He has a lot of seeds, bear with me. So anyway, he planted a seed in my head that I needed to get my shit together . . .” Paul couldn’t help but sober as he reached the next stage of his analogy. He thought about how hard it had hit him when he read the pages of her journal, and noticed how everything related.
“I needed to pull myself together . . .” He paused again to think about what would have happened if he hadn’t. “—Because you were almost ready to need me.”
Her eyes grew shiny and he knew his had too.
“Rhees . . .” Paul cleared his throat. He didn’t take his eyes off her. “Your dad took out his insurance policy the same day—the exact same day that I decided I would never use drugs again.”
Rhees’ expression remained confused, so he continued to connect the dots.
“Mitch never got into the drug scene. He hated Thailand, so Ginger, Mitch, and I started drifting around Asia, picking up work as we went. We made it to India, Mitch met Shanni, and suddenly, they were both talking about the Caribbean. Shanni mentioned this island, that it draws a lot of diving students.”
“It hit me like a hammer over the head, the feeling that I just had to get here. Of all the places in the world, this island drew me to it. The second I got off the plane, I knew I was supposed to be right here—you see? I had to be here, I had to buy this shop, because this was where you were going to show up. God was ready to send you, too—here—to me. I had to be here, and you had to come here, because he needed us to find each other. He wanted us to get together so we could—” He squeezed her to him.
“Rhees! Opposites attract for a reason. The strengths of one, balance out the weaknesses of the other. God wanted us to be together so that one’s,” he set a finger on Rhees’ chest, “goodness would no longer have to be a weakness but rather, would become strength for the other.” Paul set his hand on his own chest. “You make me a better man, and my weaknesses become strengths because I’ll use them, no holds barred, for your safe keeping. You said yourself I make you feel safe, you know how far I’d go to protect you, do anything for you.
“We balance each other. Together, we’re one—” A sudden thought brought a cocky grin to his lips. “Come on. We owe it to my parents.”
She looked confused.
“Please be the other nine-tenths of my perfection, so their wish can finally come true.”
They both laughed.
“I’ll never be perfect, but together, we’re a more perfect unit—let’s strike the word perfect. I want to abolish that word from my vocabulary. We are opposites, but I am so attracted to you, you’re so beautiful, body and soul. God gave us to each other for the good of us both, that is, if you’ll still have me. He watched her, but then thought of one more coincidence he’d discovered. He placed his hand against her cheek.
“I was eleven years old when I had my first sexual experience. I didn’t want to believe you, that there was anything wrong with that, but after hearing about yours—Rhees—you were five. We’re six years apart in age. It was July eighteenth when Pete dragged me to that beach. I know you don’t remember the date, but maybe—I really think it was the same day.”
Rhees’ eyes filled again, but she stared at him, waiting for, ready to accept what he said next.
“That summer—that day—as terrible as it was, it shaped both our lives, set things in motion. It sealed our fates, our destinies, forever.”
oOo
After taking several seconds to study each other, they fell into a loving, worshipful kiss, but it didn’t take long for that kiss to turn into something less reverent.
“Let’s stop,” he said, breaking away.
“No,” she whined, wrapping her legs around his waist.
He let out a soft, tortured groan.
“Not here. Not on Frock.”
Something happened, he didn’t know what, but her whole body went rigid.
“What’s wrong?”
“What is it this time?” she asked, gritting her teeth. Her angry eyes narrowed at him, and he had no clue where the vehemence had come from.
“You’re always telling me no. You reject every single attempt I make to be close to you.” Her voice rose with each sentence. “Nothing’s changed! For all your grandiose speeches, all the beautiful things you just said, it’s just another lie. You don’t want me.”
She pushed off from him and started swimming away. He blinked, dumbfounded, and missed the opportunity to catch her before she got too far away. He took off after her, it only took a second to catch up, but the water was too deep to stop, so he followed her, trying to reason with her. She wouldn’t have it, and refused to respond to anything he said.
She reached the ladder and started to pull herself up, but he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her back into the water with him.
“I want you,” he whispered, his tone almost begged.
“Let go of me,” she yelled.
“Keep your voice down.” He pointed up, gesturing to remind her they’d left spectators on the deck. “I’ll never have you on Frock, Rhees, and not in a public restroom, or a back alley somewhere.” He grimaced, remembering the dressing room.
“Blah, blah, blah,” she mocked, and started up the ladder again, but she always struggled with the first rung.
“You know how much I hate the idea of disrespecting you, the way I’ve disrespected so many before. You’re different. You’re my wife.”
She didn’t stop her ascent. He grabbed the other side rail, and followed her up, along the outside, trying to get her to look at him.
“Same old, same old.” She stopped climbing, but continued to scorn him, “I’m sorry, but I can’t hear the words coming out of your mouth, because your actions are screaming so loud.”
“Rhees, please, be reasonable. We can talk this through. Please, stay and talk.”
“I can’t.” She glared coldly. “I have an appointment to keep!”
Paul deadpanned.
Chapter 27
Rhees watched Paul. He held perfectly still, not even his mouth moved, the muscle in his cheek, his eyes. He just glared off, at nothing, his eyes icier than she’d ever seen.
“Paul?”
He blinked slowly and rolled his eyes to meet hers. He still didn’t say a word, and she didn’t like his expression, so she started scrambling up the ladder to get away. It felt like climbing on a treadmill, she couldn’t get herself up as fast as it felt her limbs should have managed the task.
She reached for the top rung, but he lurched up, cinched his arm around her stomach, and he jerked her back into the water. She watched helplessly as he plunged in after her. The salt water
stung, but she couldn’t take her eyes off him as she sunk below the surface.
The next thing she knew, he was dragging her under the deck, both of them immersed.
The action had taken her by such surprise she hadn’t had a chance to get a good breath. She’d never been able to hold her breath for long. She fought, not as much to get away from him, but to get up for air, but Paul was too strong. By reflex, anyone being drowned would do the same thing—she kneed him in the groin.
He released his grip on her and they both broke the surface, gasping for air. She used the timing to break away, and headed back toward the ladder, but he was on her before she’d moved more than a few inches, pushing her under again, dragging her farther under the shop.
Just as she was sure that she’d driven him to murder, his mouth covered hers with a kiss. She couldn’t believe him, that he’d have the audacity to actually give her one last kiss before he killed her with his own hands, whether he meant to or not.
She tried to see his face through the haze of the water, refusing to believe he’d hurt her. She wondered how much longer she could hold it, every millisecond felt like eternity until she could no longer ignore the reflex screaming from her burning lungs, to take that horrifying breath.
Her lungs filled with, not water, but air—Paul’s air. She greedily accepted it, and stopped fighting him, throwing her arms around his neck, keeping her mouth locked tight on his, her trust in him renewed.
He surfaced and drew in another breath.
“Paul, I’m sor—” She didn’t get her apology out.
He dived under again, not giving her the chance to finish, or catch a good breath again, but when his arms wrapped around her, and his lips locked on hers, this time in a real kiss, she gave in without a struggle. The kiss made her forget everything, being under water, drowning, he’d already drowned her with his desire.
Wet Part 3 Page 43