I sit awkwardly underneath the tree. I’d be avoiding Justin if I didn’t stand up and join them. But, if I do, I risk Justin blowing me off. I survey our equipment, trying to find something legitimate to tend to so I don’t appear rude, just busy.
My eye quickly rests on the stack of empty water bottles. Perfect.
I walk over to Justin’s truck and grab a wagon out of the bed. Justin catches my eye as I pile the empty bottles into the wagon. He takes a moment to smile at me, which results in Troy stealing the ball from him. I smile back and give a quick wave before motioning to the empty jugs of water.
Obviously I have very important work to do.
I haven’t filled the water before. I remember Troy briefing us about a water fountain in the pool area that the association welcomed us to use. I pull the wagon down the street and up the pathway to the pool. I can’t help but feel like a little girl as I haul the little red wagon around. If only I had some lemonade.
The pool complex is empty. It is a beautiful pool, shaped in a large L and surrounded with trendy loungers and umbrellas. These people live in style.
I find the water fountain on the opposite side of the pool house. I lean against the cool brick wall, filling each container with precision. I eye the pool, imagining how refreshing it would feel to dive in. I toy with the idea when the sound of the pool gate opening removes my chance.
A familiar giggle echoes off the cement around the pool. A splash soon follows. “No, you didn’t. Come here, you!” The voice is instantly recognizable—Marissa. I have no idea why she’s here but there’s no doubt that Marissa has a flirtatious agenda.
Another splash and another squeal.
I finish filling the water bottles, wanting to reveal myself to Marissa before I interrupt anything too intimate. Marissa works quickly with guys.
I’m right. Marissa has pressed her new guy into the corner, where she wraps her arms around his neck and starts kissing him. I open my mouth to clear my throat but then I notice the sandy blond hair that Marissa’s fingers are pulling through. Her hands resting on familiar biceps.
Zach!
Marissa is making out with Zach.
I don’t know what to do. I stand there witnessing their slow kiss turn into a passionate make-out moment. I want to scream at them. I want to run away and hide. But all I manage is a gasp.
It is loud enough to make them take their tongues out of one another’s mouths.
Marissa whips around, giving me, their interrupter, an annoyed expression. I watch as recognition dawns on her. She swims away from Zach and readjusts her bikini.
My eyes rest on Zach who doesn’t seem to need any time to process the situation. He nods up at me. “Hey, Lucy.” He reaches over and pulls Marissa back in front of him.
“Listen,” Marissa begins. “I was going to tell you.”
My shocked silence is replaced with livid anger.
“Bullshit.” The words spew from my mouth. Zach moves toward the stairs, slowly climbing them and walking toward me. “How long has this been going on? HOW LONG?” I shriek.
Marissa shrugs, adopting her catty face that I have seen her use on way too many victims. “About as long as you’ve been dating.” Her voice has that horrid edge, the one that allows her to step all over you … the one she used on Sally in the bathroom. She follows Zach out of the pool and ties a towel around her waist. She wraps her arms through Zach’s. “It started getting more intense the night at Old Minnie.” She giggles and looks up at Zach. “Remember, out by my car?” Zach nods.
“Oh. My. God.” I feel like I have been slapped across the face. “You really are a jealous witch, aren’t you?”
Zach takes a quick step toward me. “Dude, Lucy. It’s no big deal.”
I glare at him. “No big deal? Are you crazy? You cheated on me.”
Zach shakes his head. “Come on, Lucy. We barely even dated.”
“What?”
“Ok. Let’s be honest here. We were never really together.” He shuffles uncomfortably. “I mean … come on. You know what I mean?”
“No. I don’t.”
“Damn it. Come on. I sent you flowers last night. I took you to a nice dinner. I even tried to be romantic in the park.”
I nod. “Yup. I remember that. Sounds like dating to me.”
Zach shakes his head before replying in a condescending tone, “How do I make this clear?” He rolls his eyes. “Fine. Make me say it.” He takes a deep breath and I brace myself for what I know is coming. “I sent you flowers and you gave me nothing in return!” He pulls Marissa close to him.
Marissa pretends to gasp. “Oh Lucy, you didn’t?” She leans into Zach’s body.
Zach shrugs at me. “You won’t put out.”
My stomach revolts. Bile rushes up my throat. I swallow it as I try to find something to say. My heart races and I can’t see straight. The creaking sound of the gate saves me.
“Zach.” Justin’s voice bounces off the concrete. He suddenly is in front of me. “What are you doing here?”
“My uncle lives here. He lets me hang whenever I want.” Zach shrugs and motions toward me, “And, after last night’s disappointment, I needed some time with a real woman.” Zach grabs his bag and towel off a lounger.
Justin takes a step toward Zach as if he is going to hit him. Without thinking, I grab Justin’s hand and pull him back.
Marissa seizes the opportunity to exit. She whisks past me, pulling Zach along with her. “Sorry it didn’t work out between you. I really tried to teach you, Lucy.” She shakes her head. “You never even went down on him. My God, I didn’t know you were that clueless.”
“Well at least she’s not a slut,” Justin interjects.
Marissa looks back at Justin. “Oh, come on, Justin. You know you’ll be thinking of me in bed tonight.”
After this? Yeah right. There’s no way Justin will want to be with her.
“You always knew this was coming, Lucy. Just accept it and move on,” Marissa says with a wave as she opens the gate and steps out with Zach. “See you around.”
Zach wraps his hand around her waist, tucking his fingers into the side loop of her bathing suit bottoms.
They walk away in slow motion.
Adrenaline pumps through my body. My hands shake violently yet my legs become noodles. Justin catches me as I crumble. He eases me to a lounger.
How can Marissa and Zach do this to me? The bile returns and this time I can’t push it back down. I turn away from Justin, throwing up all over the cement.
My boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend.
I want to laugh. Best friend?
Marissa is such a manipulative bitch. How did I not see this coming?
And Zach! I wouldn’t put out. I can feel his body forcing me against the ground in the park. I start to tremble, wrapping my arms around my knees. Holding myself tight.
Justin brushes my bangs out of my eyes. That caring movement sends me into an ugly cry.
I can’t process anything.
Mad. Betrayed. Used. Insignificant.
Lost.
I close my eyes and tuck my head down in between my legs. I sob.
How can this happen to me? What did I do to deserve this? I dry heave.
Just minutes after Zach made out in the booth with me he was feeling up Marissa in the parking lot. My empty stomach turns and fills with betrayal. No wonder Marissa wanted to get me home. They were hooking up.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Warm pressure around my hands brings me back to reality. “You need to stop shaking,” Justin urges. My hands rest in his palms. I keep my eyes averted from him. I’m so humiliated. His fingertip rests on my chin, slowly tilting my head up so I’m forced to look at him.
“Lucy, I’m sorry this happened to you.”
My heart skips and immediately my mind whirls. I cannot stay in the pool complex like this forever. I need to collect myself. I sit up straight. “Yeah, well. I’m sorry too.”
He lifts h
is eyebrow while he sweeps my bangs out of my eyes. “Why would you be sorry?” His thumb rubs my wrist. My hands have stopped shaking in his. My heart pounds against my rib cage. I need to increase the distance between us before I lose my senses.
“Well, the barf, again.” I lean away from him as I motion to the ground behind me. “I’m sorry for that.”
Justin smiles and releases my hands. He also leans away from me. “Well, yeah. You owe me big time.” I nod. I know I should laugh but I can’t force it.
“Well, that answers that.” Justin stands up and extends a hand, pulling me off the lounger. Once I am on my feet, he drops my hand from his.
“What answers what?” I rub the palms of my hands against my legs, attempting to erase the memory of his hands. My heart is so confused.
“For a second I thought you weren’t going to be okay.” Justin hands me a water bottle. The water cools the burn in the back of my throat. “But if you can talk about barf, somehow I know you’ll make it.”
“Right,” I manage. I take another drink. My mouth tastes horrible. “Do you have any gum?”
Justin grabs the wagon full of water bottles and opens the pool gate. “In the truck.”
I eye the gate, not wanting to walk through. I know the moment I step through I am leaving the crime scene, which means I have to face my new reality. I have to start processing being betrayed and used. Face being alone.
Justin catches my hesitancy. “Listen, Lucy,” he motions toward the gate. “I’m not saying it’ll be easy. But, I can promise you that your life will be much better without them.” He waits for me to move. I bite my lip and step through the gate. He pulls the wagon behind us.
“So, I’ll just run this out to the guys if you want to wait in the truck. I’ll take you home.”
Home. I think of climbing in my bed and hiding under my covers. I could cry as long as I need. Just the thought of the freedom to cry brings tears to my cheeks. And then I think about my parents. What would they do if they heard me crying in my room all afternoon? Mom’d just barge in, demanding to know what was wrong.
I can never share this with her. She wouldn’t understand. My pain would become her prize, her I told you so moment.
“No.” I shake my head. “Not home.”
“Why not home?”
“I just can’t go there.”
“Then where?”
I look up the street where Alex is dancing alone to his head phones while painting window trim. “I’ll stay here.”
“You want to work?”
“Yeah, I already missed one day for illness. I don’t want to get fired.”
“I promise you won’t get fired. I’m taking you home.” Justin turns and starts walking ahead of me.
“No, really. I want to stay.” I briefly touch his arm so he will look at me. “I need to stay,” I whisper. “I need the distraction.” Tears well in my eyes.
Justin lets out a light breath. “Fine. We’ll see how it goes.”
“Thanks,” I say.
Troy approaches us as we drop off the water wagon near the supplies. “Justin. What took you so long?” Troy walks up to me and puts his hand on my shoulder. “Did you get lost, Lucy? I started to think you were ditching more of my training this afternoon.” He smiles at me playfully.
I glare at his hand on my shoulder and rudely shrug it off. My left hand begins to shake. Being hit on is the last thing I need. Troy, not taking a hint, steps closer. I eye the truck. Maybe I do want to go home.
Justin reaches out and touches my shaking hand. I take a deep breath. He casually steps between Troy and me. “What’s this about you training Lucy? I thought she was Alex’s protégé’?”
Troy shuffles his feet. “Well, she was. But I thought she needed more specialized attention than he can give.” Troy shrugs, “I’ve got the best technique so I thought I’d show her the ropes. She’s learned a lot. You should check—”
Justin holds out a hand to interrupt him. “I thought I made it clear that Lucy was to train with Alex.”
“Oh, come on. You know she’s learned all she can from the kid. Let me take her to the next level.” Troy’s undertone is clear.
“No. You stick to managing.” Justin clenches his jaw.
“Fine. I’ll go get Alex.”
Justin shakes his head. “No. That won’t be necessary. Lucy will hang with me the rest of the day.” He nods toward Alex, “Alex is killing the top trim. No reason to interrupt him.”
Troy glares back at Justin. “Fine, man. You’re the boss.” Justin swears under his breath and gathers our supplies.
“Wait. What just happened?”
Justin shakes his head as he hands me a bucket full of rags and brushes.
“You told me Troy was project manager.”
“He is.” He grabs a ladder off the driveway and effortlessly throws it over his shoulder.
“But he called you boss.”
“Hmm, caught that part, huh?” Justin scrunches up his face.
“Yeah. That’s pretty hard to miss.”
Justin turns toward me, a look of defeat on his face. “Well, that’s because I am. Troy’s my project manager.” He shrugs. “I’m the owner.”
“Wait? What? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I didn’t want you to know.” Justin sets up the ladder against the house and motions for me to climb it.
I start climbing the ladder, meeting him at eye level. “Why not?”
Justin meets my gaze. “Honestly, I thought you’d tell Marissa and then the whole school would know.” Marissa’s name is salt in my open wound. I grimace.
But he has a point. Marissa can’t keep a secret.
Justin continues, “The company is my own thing, no expectations from anyone but myself. Everything else I do,” he shakes his head, “people just know too much, you know?” I do. Justin was always the hot topic at school. I never imagined it bothered him though.
“I guess I can see that.” I climb higher and look down. “Then who’s the guy that knows my dad that got me the job?”
“Uncle Alex. He had a conference call with your dad the morning after the party and he mentioned it to me. He’s kind of the adult face of the company to give it some credentials.” He nods toward the center of the association. “I’d never have landed this gig if it wasn’t for him.”
“Uncle Alex? As in …?”
“Alex’s dad.”
“Cousins?”
“Yup.” I look at Alex, effortlessly perched on top of an eighteen-foot ladder. He has lighter hair than Justin but his frame is similar, just in a fourteen-year-old form. I think of his laugh; they have the same tone. I shake my head. “I don’t know how I missed that.”
“Eh. You see what you want to see.” He’s right. If I’d have known Alex was Justin’s cousin, I never would have been his friend. I look at Alex. He really is my only friend. He’s always been so welcoming where Justin seems determined to drive me nuts.
That’s what is odd. Justin is being so nice to me. Maybe he really does care?
Justin hands me a paintbrush before setting himself up near the base of the ladder. I climb the rest of the way up before turning around and looking down at Justin. “You know I wouldn’t have told, right?”
“Told?”
“About you owning the company.”
Justin shrugs. “Well, now I do. But, I’m still glad I didn’t tell you.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t need to give you further reason to find think I’m full of myself.”
I groan and he smiles in his taunting way.
“Justin. Please, lay off. Not today, okay? I don’t know how much more I can handle.”
“I know. That’s why I’m staying right here.” He nods toward the bottom of the ladder. “There’s no way I’m letting you go all vomiting, jelly fish again. Your relational woes will not ruin me. I’m not going to be sued by your parents for unsafe working conditions.”
“So, that’s i
t then?”
“That’s what?”
“Nothing,” I mutter before returning to trimming.
My heart sinks. I thought he was being attentive because he cared. Knowing his attention stemmed from legal purposes makes me feel even emptier than before.
I look over at Alex, who is dancing with his brush on top of his ladder. They may be cousins, but Alex would never have said that.
I am a potential liability to Justin. Not a friend.
I bite my lip as I paint, focusing on every detail of my brush stroke. I start feeling numb. At the pool complex I didn’t feel alone with Justin at my side. Now, with Justin below me, I feel completely isolated. I was a task to manage.
And then there’s Marissa and Zach. That’s how they always look at me too, an annoying task to attend to, at best, a means of entertainment. I’m Marissa’s pet project. She felt threatened the moment I started drawing attention from Zach. No wonder she always insisted on calling him for me—she was setting a nice trap for him. She couldn’t handle me being the center of attention, for once.
And Zach makes my skin crawl. I think I always knew that he was just one of those guys, after any girl who would put out. The moment he realized I wasn’t going to give him what he wanted, he welcomed Marissa onto his lap. The thought of them together literally makes me gag. I look down at Justin who is listening to his iPod, thankful he didn’t hear it.
Marissa and Zach are repulsive.
I cling to this feeling of disgust as the day wears on. It’s the key to holding on to reason. Occasionally, worthlessness and humiliation attempt to redirect my thoughts. But I won’t let them. I can’t let them. Not now. I will deal with them later. Not here.
I’m not going to cry here.
Justin doesn’t let me out of his sight the entire afternoon. Occasionally, I catch Troy glaring at him from across the courtyard. At least I don’t have to deal with him anymore. I concentrate on the angle of my brush. Each new stroke covers the dulled paint with a bolder red. I completely lose myself in painting because Troy yells, “CALL IT” much sooner than I anticipate.
Effortless With You Page 10