by Annika James
“Ashlinn!” Matt screamed.
* * * *
I sat up in bed, sweating. “Holy shit!” I panted. My hand fluttered to my chest, feeling my heart beat impossibly fast. “Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit.” I was thoroughly freaked.
What the hell was that about? Was I afraid of Conor or Tre or both? I scrambled to the end table, grabbed my dream journal, and jotted down as many of the freaky details as I could remember. I always tried to record any dreams I could remember the next morning. Sometimes, they held messages, or clues into what my subconscious desired. This dream definitely needed to be written down so I could go back over it later.
Did Conor turning into Tre mean I equated them to be the same? Did I think Matt would not be able to save me? I hated cryptic dreams. Or maybe it was just a freaky scenario that meant I was afraid of being bitten. Period.
I concentrated on slowing my breathing as I wrote. There was definitely no getting back to sleep now. A glance at the clock told me I only had an hour more until my alarm went off anyway. I put my dream journal back, got out of bed and into the shower, letting the hot water wash away the remnants of my nightmare.
True to his word, Conor showed up in my driveway just as I finished breakfast. He honked, but when I came out the front door, he held open the car door for me.
“Good morning!” I tried for sunshine, pushing his distant attitude from yesterday and the nightmare to the back of my mind.
He smiled, eyes trying to figure me out, like he hadn’t expected me to be so happy. Well, crap. I was going to make the best of this whole damn situation.
Conor wanted to pretend to date. Fine. I could pretend to pretend to like him. Both Matt and Conor wanted me to pick them, not out of desperation, but out of a real need for them. Fine. We’d see who kissed my ass the most until Saturday. Oh, wait. Matt had said he was out of the running; he didn’t want me to pick him. Fine. But if I needed help with Tre, I was damn well calling on Matt.
Then there was Tre. Would he really try to bite me at school? I shuddered a little as the nightmare resurfaced in my head.
Conor glanced at me, uttering the first words of the morning. “You okay?”
“Yeah. I just had a bad dream last night.”
His mouth tightened. “About what?”
“Tre,” I said simply. Jeez, if he squeezed the steering wheel any tighter, it would break off. I hit him playfully in the shoulder. “Don’t sweat it. Nothing for you to worry about.”
He gave me a hard look. “Ashlinn,” he said reprovingly.
“What?” I gave him innocent eyes. “Are we back to being formal now? Sarcasm is how I deal. You’ll just have to put up with it.” I tilted my head to the side as a thought occurred to me. “Do you think that’ll get annoying after a couple hundred years or so?” With the sharing of his blood, I would get to live the centuries vamps enjoyed.
His lips twitched and his grip on the wheel loosened. “Don’t worry.” His voice was lighter as he turned into the school parking lot. “If it does, I could always accidentally drink too much one day.”
It took me a moment to realize he was giving me sarcasm back.
I grinned. “So, are we holding hands?” I asked as we got out. I didn’t wait for him to come around and open my door. “Or do you wanna do the whole proprietary thing where the dude slings his arm around the chick’s shoulders?”
He grinned back at me now across the hood of his SUV. “I was thinking more of leading, while you followed two steps behind, eyes downward, like a proper familiar.” He paused, eyes twinkling at me. I was about to shoot back a retort when he continued. “Holding hands will do for now.”
I tried not to let my mouth hang open, so not attractive. He could give crap with the best of them. The joking side of Conor was new to me. Then again, almost everything about Conor was new to me. He came around and offered me his hand, entwined our fingers when I took it. Heat traveled up my arm and spread through my body. Those damn butterflies flew around spastically in my stomach. Conor turned green eyes on me and gave me his flirtiest smile.
Despite my body being completely overwhelmed by his nearness, I managed to roll my eyes. “Why are you working so hard? Aren’t we already dating?” I baited him.
He yanked me in close, stopping my heart.
“Just trying to make it look good for the audience.” He finished with a peck on my cheek, his lips branding my skin with searing heat. I sucked in a breath, trying to remain outwardly calm as we walked into school. I could not figure him out. He was so hot and cold. Was this all really just an act? He hadn’t started with the heat until we’d gotten out of his car.
“Hey, Peterson!” Tre yelled at him from across the entryway. Several heads turned in our direction. “You bite her yet?”
Conor gave Tre a wicked smile and winked. “Maybe you just can’t see it.”
Tre’s eyebrows shot up but he didn’t respond. My mouth dropped in horror, face on fire. Conor squeezed my hand as we made our way to my locker. I knew he had to play Tre, but having people think he may have bitten me intimately made my skin burn with humiliation.
Cora crouched at her locker, getting out books, while Steven looked on. Next to them, Matt slouched against the metal, hands shoved into the pockets of his baggy jeans. As Conor and I approached, Matt gave me a hopeful smile, probably hoping I wasn’t still mad at him. I wasn’t. I didn’t hold grudges, and I could never stay mad at Matt for very long.
“Hey,” I greeted everyone and let go of Conor to open my locker.
“How are things?” Cora asked.
I shrugged. I’d have to fill her in on the details later. “Tre’s still an asshole. On the upside, he might think Conor’s bitten me.”
“Well, that’s a positive.” Cora gave me a thumbs-up.
I shut my locker, probably with a little more force than necessary. Conor’s hand rested between my shoulder blades. He rubbed a little, calming my nerves.
“It’s better if he thinks I’ve bitten you. I promise.”
I nodded and leaned back against my locker. “I know, I know. Is it Saturday, yet?” I sighed and pushed off the locker. I was not going to wallow. Onward and upward. “Well, off to class. You kids are too much fun for me.”
Conor grabbed my hand as I started to leave and pulled me into his chest. “Be careful.” He leaned down to kiss me, but I pulled away. I couldn’t handle any fake kisses this morning.
“Thanks, dear,” I threw over my shoulder with a smile as Cora and I started toward class. Steven trailed after us, leaving Matt and Conor staring.
“So what’s up with you and Conor?” Cora asked. Steven caught up, kissed her quick, and disappeared down a hallway toward his own class.
“Long story,” I said on a sigh. “I promise to try and fill you in, though.”
“Hey, Speed Racer.” Matt was suddenly at my side.
“Crap, Matt! Today is not a good day to be sneaking up on me.” He dodged my girly swats at him.
“Don’t walk anywhere without me or Conor. One of us will be there to get you from class to class, okay?”
I saluted him. “Aye, aye.”
He gave me a look. “I’m serious, Ash. I don’t trust Tre at all, even if he thinks you’ve been bitten.”
I sobered a little, my nightmare still fresh in my mind. “Okay,” I conceded. “I’ll wait for you or Conor. I promise.”
“Good. I’ll see you after first hour.”
I shook my head after he’d gone. “They’re so serious.”
“Do you think Tre’s really that much of a problem?” Cora asked as we took our seats in the back of the room.
“I don’t know. You don’t hear about people getting attacked by vamps all that often. Definitely not in school. He does kinda scare the crap out of me, though.”
“True. To all of the above. But according to the Council, it’s been awhile since there was a witch as powerful as you.”
I kept my voice low as the teacher started his lesson. �
��I just can’t imagine risking all the trouble he’d get into just to bite me once. It won’t make me his familiar.”
“No,” Cora agreed. “But if he bites you, he has the first shot at making you agree to become his familiar.”
“See. I don’t get that. Even if he’d bitten me against my will? Shouldn’t I get to say whose familiar I become?”
Cora shrugged. “My parents aren’t involved in the Council. I’m not really up on vamp politics.”
“Well, they suck,” I lamented.
“So tell me what’s up with Conor.” She leaned forward in her desk so we could talk softer. Instead of doing our work, Cora and I discussed Conor the rest of the period.
I told her how both Matt and Conor refused to bite me when I asked them and how Conor had gone from seducing me one minute to being totally cold and formal the next.
“It’s like he’s not sure if he likes me or not. So on one hand, he tries to seduce me into picking him, then feels guilty and gets all polite and gentlemanly. I just don’t know which Conor is the real one.” I sighed, glancing at the clock. Class was almost over.
Cora shook her head. “I don’t know what to tell you. He seems to be just odd like that. Almost as if he’s just doing his duty, and he tries to actually enjoy it before he remembers it’s a job. Crazy.”
I paused. Cora had a point. A scary, heart-wrenching point.
“You know.” I started as the bell rang. “You might be right. That sounds exactly like what he’s doing.”
Matt waited for us outside the door. “You think the Council, like, assigned him to me?” I whispered before Matt fell in step with us.
Cora pondered my question. “I honestly have no idea.”
“What are we talking about?” Matt inquired.
“Boys,” I said, not elaborating. Cora remained quiet on the topic as well.
“Hey, Finley.” Tre walked up to us. My pulse sped with anxiety. “Where’s Peterson?”
“He has his own schedule, Tre,” Matt said flatly.
“Hey, Tre, why do you care so much about Conor?” Cora nudged him.
“No reason.” He turned his attention to me. “So, Ash, did he make you his familiar, yet?”
I lifted my chin. “I haven’t decided whose familiar I’m going to be yet.”
He smiled. “So I have a chance.”
I forced a smile. “I wouldn’t say that. It’s definitely going to be either Conor or Matt. I’m sticking with guys I know and trust, you know?” I was trying to be calm and polite. We arrived at my next class and paused.
“You didn’t know Peterson before Saturday. Just remember that. He may be a completely different person than what he’s showing you now. Just want you to be careful.” Yeah. I’m sure he really cared. “See ya.”
When he was gone, Matt turned to me. “Don’t listen to him. Conor’s working hard at being honest with you.”
“Is he, Matt? How well do you know him?” I challenged him.
He looked frustrated. “Ashlinn, no one likes this situation…”
I interrupted him. “Really? Seems to me you guys both get nothing but a big, fucking win out of this. I’m the big, fat loser. I guarantee I hate this situation the most. I’m so sorry the two of you have to be put in this situation. I release you from your guard duty. I don’t really want to see you the rest of the day, thanks.”
“Ash.”
I stormed into class, leaving him in the hallway. Cora was smiling. How dare he say he didn’t like the situation? I was the one being forced into a type of servitude that could last centuries. I was the one whose best friend wanted more. The one whose crush went from seducing her to pushing her away in nanoseconds. And what had Tre meant about Conor? Was I really just his Council-appointed duty?
* * * *
Despite my outburst, Matt still waited for me after class. I ignored him and walked to my locker to exchange books. He just sighed and followed me, wisely not saying anything.
After third hour, Conor showed up to be my escort. My heart leapt when I saw him slouched against the wall, hands stuffed into his pockets, waiting for me. I set my jaw and refused to say anything to him, though I did allow him to hold my hand, my traitorous skin all afire from his touching me. Damn.
“Matt said you had a run-in with Tre earlier.” Conor’s voice was low.
I shrugged it off. “It was no big. I told him he was definitely not in the running. I don’t know if it made a difference.”
“Probably not. I like that you can stand up for yourself.” He smiled at me. I gave him a blank stare. His forehead wrinkled with concern. “What’s wrong?”
“Why would there be anything wrong?” I evaded. I didn’t want to get into it now. He moved to the side of the hallway, pulling me close, and wrapped his arm around my waist.
“Hey,” he said softly, gazing down at me. Why was he suddenly being warm and confusing? Oh, wait. People were looking.
I feebly put a hand to his chest to keep our bodies from completely touching head to toe. He was solid and warm. A steady, strong heartbeat pulsed under my hand, lulling me. Oh, he was still talking.
“Come with me after school. You can stay for dinner and homework. I promise I won’t seduce you.” He grinned down at me.
It was hard not to respond. He’s pretending, he’s pretending, I reminded myself.
I grimaced. “I wasn’t worried about that.” He opened his mouth to protest. I pushed at him. “Fine. I’ll come over. I need to talk to you anyway.”
I turned to leave. He held me fast and kissed my forehead.
“I’ll see you at lunch.” He released me slowly, his fingers lingering on my skin as he walked away with a grin. I went into class, telling my elated self he was just acting. Yeah. I didn’t believe me either.
Chapter Ten
Cora, Matt, and I walked to lunch quietly. I wasn’t quite as mad at Matt as before, but I wasn’t totally over my anger yet. I knew I was taking my frustrations out on him, there just wasn’t much else I could do. We joined Conor and Steven at a table in the back corner. Conversation was sparse as we ate. I was pretty sure people were being careful not to set me off, not wanting a repeat of my last outburst.
“Matty,” I started. He looked at me. “I’m sorry for yelling at you. I know this is hard for you, too. I’m hurting you, and no matter who I choose, it will hurt you. I hate that.”
Matt swallowed, glancing at Conor before turning to me. “You know I’ll do it if I you absolutely need me to. No matter what it does to me.” His voice was scary serious.
“I know,” I said sadly. “You are the best, most unselfish person I know. I don’t deserve you.”
Wow. Weren’t we all sappy today? Cora was smiling at us. I couldn’t look at Conor. He would probably be all gloaty because he was pretty much a lock for the position of getting my power.
Matt looked between us again. “You should just pick him now and get it over with, Ash. I’m worried about you going to this party Friday night.”
I shifted in my chair, studiously avoiding looking in Conor’s direction. It wasn’t like I hadn’t tried. Conor had refused to bite me when I’d asked. Dammit.
“I’ll think about it,” was all I said.
Conor took my left hand in his, finally forcing my attention to him.
“We have time,” he said. “If everyone thinks we’re dating, and I’ve claimed you already, that should be enough for most to stay away.”
“Except Tre,” Matt added with a scowl.
Conor nodded once. “Except Tre.”
If people think we’re dating. Goddess, I didn’t have to be a good actress because my body reacted to Conor like we really were dating. He was the only one acting. He deserved a damn Oscar.
“See, Matt?” I said with forced cheerfulness. “We have nothing to worry about. As long as Conor keeps pretending to like me, it’s all good.” Okay, I couldn’t help the pettiness in my rising voice. I guess I was just fed up with Conor pretending to date me and w
anting to be friends. How he would kiss me but refused to bite me.
Matt’s eyes widened and Cora stopped eating to glance at me like I was on the verge of exploding. Conor stiffened. Before anyone could say anything, I let go of Conor’s hand and stood. I seemed to have lost my appetite.
I grabbed my tray and walked to the return window, eyes stinging. I blinked rapidly, forcing back tears. After dumping my leftovers, I turned, and ran right into Tre.
“Shit!” I exclaimed, more frightened than I wanted to admit. I put my hands out to keep some space from him. He gripped my arms just above the elbows, his touch cold, the opposite of Conor’s. I pulled away from him, uncomfortable at his proximity.
“Sorry,” he said smiling, not sounding sorry at all.
“Yeah, sure. No problem,” I muttered and moved to go around him. He moved with me, blocking my exit. I looked at him with irritation. “Tre. Excuse me,” I said with an edge to my voice.
He kept smiling. “You know vamp hearing is exceptional, right?” he asked conversationally.
Shit, shit, double shit. Had he overheard our conversation? I didn’t know what to say as my pulse raced. I stared at him with wide eyes. He wouldn’t dare attack me in the middle of the cafeteria, would he? He reached out and picked imaginary lint off my shirt. I shuddered.
“Peterson’s stupid,” he retorted. “Why’s he holding out on you?”
I stiffened. “It’s really none of your business. For the record, I have no desire to be your familiar, so leave me alone.”
His icy eyes melted into something dark, almost threatening. “Why not?” He brushed a finger down my neck. Repulsed by his cold touch, I drew away slightly. He continued. “I think we’d be good together. I’d want you for my consort, too, unlike Peterson.”
He jerked his chin toward my table. I followed his gesture with my eyes. Everyone at my table watched our exchange. Cora gripped Steven’s arm, her eyes wide with fear. Matt’s hard eyes glared at Tre. I knew he could be here in a matter of seconds, if need be. Conor’s hands pressed flat on the table, as though bracing to stand. Nobody wanted a scene, though, so we all remained hanging on the precipice of action.