“He certainly is,” I proudly reply.
Steph passes me two cups. “Doesn’t it scare you about what comes next though, Jessica. Does it not worry you about him getting film offers from overseas?”
Her question throws me a little. I am not rightly sure what I think about it. I hesitate before answering. “A little, I suppose. But you can’t live your life worrying about things, which may or may not happen. What will be . . . will be,” I answer with a satisfied smile. What exactly should I be worrying about here? I wonder to myself.
“Do you think that Jonny will want to live in America?” Steph asks with innocent curiosity.
Inwardly, I begin to panic but I try to suppress it by answering as calmly as I possibly can. “I don’t think so.” Fuck! Would Jonny want to live in America? My thoughts scream at me. I try to show I am not too concerned about her innocent question, but beneath my bravado I am quaking in my bloody boots. Not once have I ever considered whether Jonny would want to move to America, should his career take off there. Fuckety Fuck!
Steph doesn’t pick up on my runaway thoughts. She light-heartedly shrugs her shoulders. “I don’t think so either. He loves England and he has you and his mum to consider too, I guess.” she comments.
“I suppose.” I answer, shakily.
It’s no fucking use. I can no longer hide my emotions. I look to the floor with a quivering chin and tears filling my afraid eyes. It is only then that Stephanie reads my tortured expression. “Oh, Jessica, I didn’t mean to upset you.” She apologetically hugs me.
“It’s okay. I just never stopped to think about where this role could lead, Steph.” I say, trying to control my emotions.
“Listen, Jonny would never do anything to jeopardise your relationship.”
I don’t hear Steph’s words; I start rambling. “I could never leave this country. I have hurt the girls enough already. As painful as it would be, I would have to stay with them if Jonny wanted to go.” Shit! This is really bad! Why hadn’t I thought of this before?
Stephanie moves close to my face. “I am sure it won’t come to that, Jessica. I am going to give you the very same advice that you gave to me, talk to him!”
Just then Lydia comes to join us. “Jessica darling, is there anything you want me to do?”
Rubbing my eyes, I grab the dishcloth. “We are nearly done, thanks Lydia,” I reply quickly.
Steph backs away from me and continues to load the dishwasher. Lydia watches me, her brow is arched with intrigue as she studies my face. She sucks in her cheeks with a pout. Then she clicks her fingers in my face, with one hand on her hip. “Spill . . . what is wrong?” she demands.
“Nothing, I’m overreacting that’s all.” I try to dismiss how I am feeling. I cannot bear to be upset . . . not today.
Lydia nudges against me. “I am the one who is the drama queen around here, darling. Tell me what exactly it is and then I’ll decide if it’s worthy of being melodramatic or not.” She taps her toe impatiently.
Stephanie puts her apologetic hand on mine, her eyes conveying her apology. “It’s my fault, Lydia. I asked Jessica whether it worried her where this film role in America may lead. For example, what if Jonny wanted to live out there. I didn’t stop to think . . . me and my bloody insensitive mouth!”
Lydia nods while crossing her arms. “Hmmm . . . on the scale of melodrama, I’d say that was an eight.”
I frown. “Coming from you . . . now I really am worried.” I say with the tiniest of smiles.
“Have you asked Jonny?” Lydia questions.
I slowly shake my head. “No . . . the thought never even crossed my mind . . . not until Steph brought it to my attention.”
Stephanie’s arms are soon wrapped around me. “Like I said . . . me and my bloody big mouth!”
“There is no need to apologise. Although; you have raised a valid point. This is now something I do need to know,” I try to reassure Steph with a smile.
Lydia interrupts, “Then you must talk to Jonny about this, my darling. He is going in a few days and you can’t let him go with this hanging over your pretty little head.”
“I will, but it will have to wait until after the girls have gone home.” I run my hand through my hair with a sigh.
“Actually, darling. I wanted to talk to you about that. Would it be an inconvenience for Simon to drop off me and Jake, too?”
I stand straight and turn to Lydia. “I thought you were staying a little longer?”
“We were, but I think you and Jonny need some time alone and walking in on this conversation . . . I now know you do.”
“Don’t be daft. Besides, Helena is going to be here,” I reply.
“No, she isn’t. I just heard her telling Jonny that she is leaving tomorrow because she has to attend an important Christmas exhibition or something.” Lydia frowns.
“Really? I am surprised that she’s not staying for Christmas Day.”
“Apparently her closest friends have arranged it all, a bit of a last minute thing,” Lydia says.
“As long as it is just that and she’s not going because she feels she ought to.”
“From what I have seen of Helena, she doesn’t strike me as the type of person who would lie.” Lydia giggles.
By coincidence, Helena comes up behind Lydia. “Did I hear my name being mentioned?” She confidently strolls in.
“Is it true you are not staying for Christmas Day now?” I ask.
Helena stands beside me, nodding. “I’m afraid so, my lovely. My dear friends Martha and Don had organised a small exhibition party for the New Year. However, they have had to move it forward as a couple of the artists need their artwork for a bigger exhibition, which is also being held in the New Year. I really need to be there as it’s going to have all the people who exhibit my artwork in their galleries and it would seem terribly rude to not attend.”
I loop my arm through Helena’s. “You’re not going to be alone on Christmas Day, are you?”
“Jessica. I can assure you, I am only ever alone when I want to be.” She defiantly stands with her hand on her hip and smirks.
“Is that all you are telling us?” I ask with a big smile on my face.
Helena shifts slightly but isn’t giving anything juicy away. Her audacious expression is one of ‘I’m not telling.’ God, I do love this mature woman’s self-confidence! She answers with a crooked grin, “For now, that is all you need to know. So, lovely ladies, I think the men could do with some help as Lissy and Lottie are wiping the floor with them at Monopoly.” With a quick change of conversation, Helena is already walking out of the kitchen. Now I know where Jonny gets his mischievous charm from.
Linking arms with both Steph and Lydia, we follow Helena. “We had better rescue our men, my girls are devilishly competitive at board games,” I laugh.
We walk into the small reception room. Lissy and Lottie are beside one another on one side of the table, while Jonny, Jake and Harry sit at the other side. They are all huddled around the Monopoly board; the girls are tapping each other, giggling loudly.
“Now come on, girls, I have all the reds except The Strand. I need that one so I can start building houses on it.” Harry’s pleading face only makes the girls laugh more.
Lissy is wafting the much needed card in his face, playfully goading him. “Sorry Harry, but I’m holding onto it for that very reason.” She giggles.
“You girls sure play rough.” Harry slumps back in his chair with a huff.
“You’re not sulking, are you Harry?” I ask, amused by how defeated Harry appears to be.
“Jessica, thank God you are here. These girls may look all sweetness and light, but they play hard.” He holds his hands up like he’s surrendering to their game of fierce Monopoly.
“Are you being thrashed?” I ask. Harry nods, scratching his bewildered head.
Jake sits beside him laughing, throwing the dice. “We are up against a tactical offensive here. Remind me to NEVER play board games with th
ese two again.” He winks at Lissy and Lottie.
I stroke the girls’ heads. “I’m afraid my little Monopoly Madams are going to have to wrap up this game shortly. You both need to get ready for Simon.”
Lydia strokes Jake’s back to get his attention. “Darling, we are going with the girls so we had better start getting ready, too.” She smiles adoringly at him.
With relief, he throws his cards on the table before standing up. “That is my cue to bow out gracefully from this game.” He teasingly bows to the girls, which they respond to with a fit of giggles.
“Wimp,” Jonny mutters.
Jake grabs Jonny’s shoulder. “I don’t deny it, buddy. These girls are way too scary.”
Jonny turns to Harry. “Do you want to carry on the game, Harry? Or shall we admit defeat?”
Harry grumbles, “An embarrassing defeat.”
“We surrender, girls.” Jonny holds his hands up as Lissy and Lottie do a victorious high five to one another.
Tapping the girls gently, I turn to walk away. “Come on you two, I don’t think they can bear much more humiliation.” Laughing, they both follow me out of the reception room and up the stairs to their room.
Once in their room, I get out their bags and put them on the bed. “Have you texted your dad to tell him what time you are coming home?” I ask, folding some clothes.
“Not yet, Mum.” Lottie shakes her head.
“I have.” Lissy smiles back at me.
She is such a sensible, thoughtful girl. I stroke her soft hair. “Good girl. Have you enjoyed yourself?”
“Yep, more than I thought I would,” she answers truthfully. I pull her close to me. I never tire of the sweet smell of her golden hair.
Lottie gently pushes into me. “I have loved every single minute, Mum.”
I fold my other arm tightly around her, too. “I have loved having you here with us, my darlings. Thank you for being so brave by coming here to be with me. I know how difficult it must have been and for that, I am so proud of you both.” I kiss them on the top of their heads.
“Are you still going to come up tomorrow, Mum?” Lottie holds me tighter as she looks me in the eye. Her loveable face could literally light up a room.
I smile, squeezing them both. “You try stopping me! Maybe I can pick you both up about noon. We can spend a few hours together at the new flat and then you have the rest of the evening with your dad?” I ask cheerfully.
“Is it okay to tell Dad about the flat?” Lissy asks, looking up at me.
“I think he should know, darling. He has a right to know where you are staying and who with.” I answer, stroking her baby soft cheek.
“That’s good, I don’t want to have to hide anything from him,” she replies.
“I never want either of you to hide anything from me or your dad, do you understand?” Both of them nod with grave expressions.
Lissy hugs me tight. “We won’t, Mum.”
“There has been enough hurt in this family already. I know that is mostly down to me, but I never want you both feeling like you can’t be honest about your feelings or about what is happening in your lives. I will love you no matter what you think or feel.”
“And we love you, don’t we Lottie?” Lissy smiles.
“Yes, we do.” Lottie beams at me.
Hearing their words immediately fills my eyes with proud emotion. Lissy is the first to react. “Don’t cry, Mum.”
“They are tears of happiness, darling. Ignore me . . . I’m just being silly.” I sweep away a falling tear.
“Are you sure?” she asks. I let out a little snuffled laugh through my happy tears. My laughter makes their worried expressions soften with relief and within seconds we are all laughing. Together we pack. We excitedly discuss the flat. What their friends will be saying when they see them next and of course, we talk about the concert to see The Wanted.
The apartment grows quieter. Lissy, Lottie, Jake and Lydia have all left. After the sheer excitement and frantic preparations for the party, a relaxed and more sombre mood is now filling the place. The hours seem to be passing by incredibly quickly and there is so much to still fit in before Jonny leaves. Christmas Eve is going to be a busy day, saying good-bye to Helena, Stephanie and Harry. Then I am travelling up to see the girls and the new flat before travelling back to Chelsea to spend some quality time with my beautiful Jonny.
I can’t deny I am grateful for being given the time to be alone with him for Christmas Day, as he will be leaving the day after Boxing Day. I intend to savour every single precious moment I can.
I am in the kitchen, looking at all the food left over and deciding whether I need to get anything else in for Christmas dinner. Jonny joins me, sliding his arms around my waist, peeping over my shoulder to see what I’m looking at. “What you doing, Dimples?” he playfully asks.
“Just seeing if we need anything for our Christmas dinner.” I reply, tilting my head back against him.
Jonny smiles. “I very much doubt it, there’s still loads left to eat.”
I nod. “That’s what I was thinking.”
“Besides, I don’t want you having to spend our last days together cooking.”
I turn my head, so I can see him. “But I wanted to cook you a special dinner.” I whine.
“We can eat what is left. I will decorate the table for two, I’ll even use candles.” He smirks, then rains silly little kisses all over my neck.
“Stop teasing!” I close the cupboard abruptly and manoeuvre around to face him. His grin is boyishly charming. I take a moment to soak in his perfect features. His straight, small nose, his strong, defined bone structure, his full lips that are so kissably soft and his bright hazel eyes all make him so very intoxicating to me. He is just perfection.
Those lips, which I adore, meet mine . . . gently. Jonny kisses me; his sensuous mouth makes me feel like my feet have left the ground, that I am floating on bliss. He ends the kiss, cupping my face in his hands. “I’m not teasing you, beautiful. I am being serious. Whatever and wherever we eat, is going to be special because I’m with you.” I am now enveloped in his loving arms. He is right . . . none of it matters as long as we are together.
Helena walks in. Her apologetic eyes and sorry smile is written all over her face. “I didn’t mean to disturb you both, just wanting a quick drink of water.”
“You’re not disturbing us, Helena.” I smile, resting my head on Jonny’s shoulder.
“Jonny, would I be able to use the hot tub in a bit? I fancy a dip.” she asks.
“Of course you can, Mum. I’ll go and get it ready.”
“There’s no rush.”
“It’s fine. It won’t take me long.” Jonny kisses my hand then strolls out of the room, leaving me with Helena.
“I fancy a dip, too. Would you mind if I join you, Helena?” I can tell from her broad smile that she is happy for me to do so.
“That would be lovely, Jessica.”
The cold gloaming sky does nothing but enhance the sultry hue of the hot tub lights beneath the whispers of dancing steam. It is warmly inviting. Helena and I, slowly ease ourselves into the bubbling water.
“Oh, that is so good.” I close my eyes, the heat and movement of the water feels soothing against my skin.
“I love hot tubs. They are good for these old bones.” Helena contentedly sighs.
“Have you got one in Devon?” I ask.
“Oh, yes I do, my lovely. Jonny bought it for me a few years ago. I have had many a hot tub party at mine,” she says. For some reason visions of wild debauchery and frisky frolics race through my mind.
“The tub was a big hit with my girls, too.” I lay my head back.
“What lovely girls they are, Jessica. A real credit to you.”
“Thank you, Helena. They think fondly of you, too.”
“How do they feel about Jonny? They appeared to have got on very well.”
I bring my head up to look at Helena, who has steam snaking up her neck and sho
ulders. “They like him; I think the ice has definitely thawed.”
“He’s a charming person. It would be hard not to like him, but then I’m very biased.” She grins.
“Me, too.” I laugh.
Helena is lifting her foot up out of the water, playing with the bubbles. “How are you feeling now we are getting closer to Jonny leaving?” Although she is playing with the water her expression is serious when she glances across at me.
“I’m dreading it, but we’ll get through it . . . we have to, don’t we?” I say, trying to sound positive.
“Yes, you do. If anything, Jessica; this will make you stronger.”
I look up. “I hope so. It has been a bit of a whirlwind with Jonny. I have only just started to feel settled and it’s because I have been here the whole time. I am going to be returning to work in the new year. I have Lissy and Lottie to take care of, too. I suppose I have been living in a bit of a protective bubble all the time I have been recuperating. Soon, it will be back to reality. What with Jonny’s career and my life, we will just have to juggle it all and pray it will be okay.” I duck my head under the heated water, washing away my fears.
When I resurface, I wipe the water from my eyes. Helena’s smile is waiting for me. “As long as you have love at the foundation of your life, it will be the glue which holds everything together. Never forget that, my lovely.”
“I have no doubt of my love.” I blink assuredly.
Helena smiles. “Jonny loves you with all that he is, Jessica. You have turned my boy into a man.”
My already ruddy, perspiring cheeks turn a deeper crimson. “That’s so lovely to hear you say that, Helena.”
“It’s true! I have seen him grow so much and seeing him with your girls was a true joy.”
I coyly smile. I know Helena’s joy because I felt the very same when I saw the girls playing Monopoly with him. When Lottie threw her arms around him to thank him for The Wanted tickets, my heart literally swelled with happiness. “Can I ask you something, Helena?”
A Famous Affair Page 45