by Joyce Alec
“You have letters of recommendation?”
Sarah fumbled for a moment before handing over three ribbon-tied letters. She hoped Mary’s forgery would stand up to the test. Oliver, the Duke of Huntington, flicked through them impatiently before turning his gaze back to Sarah.
“I do not think we will suit, I’m afraid. My children are noisy, rambunctious and need a firm hand.” His eyes raked over her form. “I am not convinced that you are capable of doing so.”
At his words, Sarah’s heart began to beat in earnest. Somehow, she had to convince him that she could be a capable governess, able to care for and educate his children. She needed this to be her escape. She rose to her feet, wobbling a little on her unsteady legs.
“Your Grace, I may be small in stature, but that does not prevent me from being firm and authoritative. I have much to teach your children, and I beg you, at least give me an opportunity to prove it to you!”
She hated her pleading tone, wishing she had better hidden her desperation. He was studying her again and, with a lift of her chin, she studied him right back. Dark hair that fell untidily over his ears, and deep brown eyes that seemed to penetrate her very soul. She wanted to look away but knew she must prove her tenacity, meeting his firm gaze with one of her own. She willed the duke to allow her one chance, one opportunity, to change it for the better.
“Very well, Miss Brown, you may stay. However, you will remain only if I am certain that things are going well. Otherwise, I will give you notice.”
A wave of emotion burst over Sarah as she tried to stutter her thanks, instead managing to faint clean away.
2
It wasn’t until the following morning that Sarah awoke, finding herself in a narrow but cozy bed, dressed in one of her nightgowns. Completely disorientated, she sat up to hear a quiet knock on the door. Pushing her hair out of her eyes, she watched as the door opened and a maid walked in, smiling at Sarah.
“Good morning, glad to see you are awake at last! I’m Meg, one of the maids here. Mighty worried we were about you, but the master said you’d be right as rain by morning!”
Sarah stared at her for a moment, as it all came flooding back.
“How...how did I get here?”
“He carried you miss, do you not remember? Mind you, you were like a rag doll in his arms! I changed you; your wet clothes have been cleaned and are drying nicely. All your things have been put away too.”
Trying to stand, Sarah found her legs were still wobbly, her whole body protesting at the movement.
“Now, now, miss, you stay right there. There’ll be food up for you in a minute so you can break your fast, then the master’s ordered a bath!”
“A bath?”
“A bath! Just for you! Imagine that, a bath for a governess! He says something about you being all dirty and wet from your ride or some such thing.” Sarah blushed to the tips of her ears. “Then after that,” Meg continued, “you are to meet the children and His Grace in the nursery.”
Her stomach lurching at the thought, Sarah allowed herself to be placed back in bed. Soon there came hot tea and food to break her fast before she was presented with a steaming bath. Sinking gratefully into the hot water, she let her body relax as some the pain melted away. At least now she would be able to walk, instead of collapsing in front of him.
“Can you tell me about the duke?” she asked Meg, soaping her hair. She swore Meg blushed a little before she replied.
“His Grace? Owns this estate and all the land around it. Very wealthy, too. Takes good care of his tenants and us here in the house.” Her cheeks reddened again. “He is a handsome master too, is he not?”
Sarah was quiet for a moment. She supposed he was handsome in some ways, but his tone and loud voice provoked a reaction of fear, not admiration or desire.
“I suppose,” she replied.
At least she knew he was a good master, which said a lot about a man. Over the years, her father’s servants had left their employment until only a few remained. Now that she was gone, she wondered if Mary and Jack would find better positions. She couldn’t blame them if they did.
“What about his children?”
Meg broke into a wide smile. “Ah, the twins. Get into everything those two, but both cute as a button! Just turned but six years old.”
Sarah didn’t smile, the description making her panic over her ability to control and educate the twins to their father’s satisfaction.
“What happened to their mother? The notice for a governess said nothing about her.”
“Oh, she died, miss, a long time ago. The twins were barely a year old when she passed. Didn’t give them much more than a look though, in that year. Was like she didn’t even see them!”
“How sad,” Sarah commented quietly, her heart softening a little.
“She and the duke had been betrothed since infancy,” Meg continued, as though she hadn’t heard her. “There was not any love between them; we were certain of that. You could hear her screaming most days, over anything it seemed!”
Shivering slightly, Sarah got out of the bath and began to dry herself, the memory of her own screams at her father’s hands echoing in her mind.
“A nasty piece of work, she was,” Meg said, handing Sarah her outfit piece by piece. “No one was sad when she died, not even the master, though he did his duty an’ all.”
Clothed in a dark gray, high-collared dress, Sophie stared at herself in the mirror. She looked the part; her long brown hair was swept up into a tightly knotted bun, her hands clasped gracefully in front of her.
“Excellent, Miss. Now, up to the nursery. I’ll show you the way.”
Swallowing a lump in her throat and praying that God would be with her, Sarah nodded and followed after Meg.
The duke had not exaggerated when he called his twins ‘rambunctious.’ Sarah watched them scrambling around the room, playing a game that only the two of them knew, uncaring about the destruction they were causing. The duke, instead of watching them, kept his eye on the little governess, trying to gauge her response. She was hiding her reaction well, although he could tell from the widening of her eyes that she was a little taken aback.
“Children,” he said quietly, his single spoken word causing both his children to stop immediately and look up. “Come here and meet your governess.”
Sarah was not surprised by his authority; he clearly had the respect of his children as well as his staff. Both children greeted her politely, the son bowing as he ought and the daughter executing a near perfect curtsy. Clearly, they had been taught well.
“Children, please meet Miss Brown, your new governess.” His Grace continued, “Miss Brown, this is Elizabeth and Samuel.”
“I am pleased to meet you both,” Sarah said to the two small faces peering inquisitively up at her. “I am sure we shall get along very well together.”
She was rewarded with a smile from Elizabeth and a grin from Samuel, who appeared to be itching to start running around again. The duke put his hand on the boy’s shoulder, ensuring he stayed put.
“I shall leave you to get acquainted,” he said, more to the children than to Sarah. “You will both treat Miss Brown with respect; she is here to educate you both, and I expect you to do as you are told.” His tone was firm, but his eyes were smiling. Sarah was relieved to know that he was not a tyrant and it was evident that both his children adored him. “I shall be up again later to see you, and I want a good report from Miss Brown.”
“Yes, sir,” they both chimed, their blue eyes looking up at Sarah in wide-eyed innocence. Sarah supposed they got their blue eyes from their mother, but their dark hair was almost identical to the duke’s.
His touch on her arm startled her, and she turned to find him leaning down to her, lowering his voice as he spoke.
“Do not let their appearances fool you, Miss Brown. They are the most precocious pair of children imaginable!”
His breath tickled her neck, his mouth close to her ear as he tried
to stop his children from hearing his words. She shivered slightly, his nearness completely overwhelming her senses. He smelled of pine and cigar smoke, his low voice sending tremors through her body. She closed her eyes briefly before replying.
“Thank you, Your Grace. I will be sure to keep on my guard.”
Giving herself a slight shake, she heard the duke leave, closing the door behind him. She was sure he chuckled as he left the room.
Outside the door to the nursery, the duke paused for a moment, rubbing his hand across his face. The wet, bedraggled creature was no more, instead transformed into a handsome woman with a pretty smile and fine curves that even her dull gown could not hide. He enjoyed seeing her reaction to him, but that was warning enough. A good governess was hard to find, and he was not about to ruin her reputation with a quick roll in the hay. His children would never forgive him if he had to send her away. Never mind the fact that he was sure she was untouched and, as a rule, he did not go near chaste women. He grimaced as he walked down the hallway back to his rooms. Shaking his head to himself, he entered his study.
3
It was clear that the twins were going to test her, right from the start. No sooner had she sat them down in the newly dusted and decorated schoolroom were they up again and crawling under the desks. First, Sarah tried to reason with them, but they ignored every single word she said. It was as though she was not in the room! She tried to raise her voice, but it came out as just a squeak. Elizabeth and Samuel continued their games, laughing and giggling as they chased each other around the room.
Giving up, Sarah sat back in her chair, her head in her hands. She had no one to turn to, no one to ask for help. Should the duke walk into a scene like this, she was sure she would be given immediate notice. Praying in desperation, she begged silently for help to the One she knew was always there. A single tear escaped from the corner of her eye and ran down her cheek as she prayed, frustrated at her own lack of proficiency.
A small hand touched her knee, and she raised her head to see Elizabeth’s concerned little face looking into her own.
“Are you sad, Miss Brown?”
Sarah let out a little laugh.
“Yes, Elizabeth, I suppose I am a little sad.”
To her surprise, Elizabeth’s eyes became angry, and she suddenly turned to her brother.
“Samuel, we will sit down now and do our lessons, and then Miss Brown will not be sad anymore.”
Samuel was idly picking at a small knot in the desk, his face a mixture of guilt and stubbornness, but to Sarah’s utter relief, she saw him nod.
Now feeling both a mixture of embarrassment and gratitude, Sarah patted Elizabeth’s hand whilst sending up a quick prayer of thanks. She was grateful that Elizabeth, despite her tender years, seemed to understand what was required of her and that her brother, however unwillingly, was following suit.
“Thank you, my dear. I am sure that your father will be pleased with a good report.”
On hearing his father mentioned, Samuel bolted to a desk and sat down immediately whilst Elizabeth picked up two slates and gave one to Samuel before sitting down at her own desk. Sarah smiled, making a mental note to mention the duke whenever there was even a whiff of trouble. She turned to the blackboard and prepared to start some basic arithmetic, but Samuel’s voice stopped her.
“Miss Brown, may I ask you a question?”
He was all decorum now, she thought grimly, but turned to him with a bright smile, nodding her consent.
“Will you birch us, if we get some wrong?”
Sarah’s mouth dropped open. The child was only six years old and at the very start of his education. Whatever had given him the idea that she would switch him for making mistakes?
“Of course not, Samuel, whatever made you think such a thing?”
Samuel dropped his head, his face burning red as he refused to reply. Sarah, still looking for her answer, turned to Elizabeth.
“Well?”
“Miss Hewson — the governess before you — she would birch us. She kept it in her desk.”
Sarah could not abide the idea of switching the children. She wanted them to trust her, to respect her and to, most importantly, feel safe with her. She wanted to foster a love of learning and an excitement about the world around them. Fear was a poor form of control and not something she ever intended to use. Walking to her desk, she quickly found the switch and walked back over to Samuel. His eyes grew large, and she quickly knelt down, attempting to dispel any fear.
“Samuel,” she said quietly. “I will make you a promise, right here and now. I promise you that I will never, ever birch you. I will not be upset if you make mistakes, but I do want you to do your best and to try hard with your lessons. Do you understand?”
Samuel nodded, still refusing to look at her, keeping his eyes on the switch in her hand.
“I keep my promises, Samuel, and I have promised never to birch you, have I not? Therefore, there is no use for this, is there?” She held up the switch.
Samuel slowly raised his gaze to her face, a dawning comprehension in his eyes.
“No, Miss Brown, there is not.”
Sarah smiled at him.
“Then may I suggest that you throw it in the fire?”
Sarah could tell this was more than just a simple gesture to him, watching as he grabbed the switch out of her hands, walked to the blazing fire and, after a moment, threw it in. She pretended not to hear the sniffling coming from him as he stood before the flames, watching the switch take light and begin to burn. Pain squeezed her heart as she thought of such a small boy being inflicted with painful welts over something as simple as making an arithmetic mistake. It would take time, but she would gain his trust, she was sure of it. This was a step in the right direction.
After a few minutes of silence, broken only by the cracklings from the fire, Samuel turned and walked back towards his desk, a look of peace on his face. He did not touch her, but she caught his quiet, ‘thank you’ as he passed. Thrilled, Sarah realized that this was her first step in building a relationship with the children. Picking up her chalk, she commenced her arithmetic lesson with gusto.
Unbeknownst to Sarah, the duke had witnessed the entire scene. He had been out riding early, as was his routine, and had deliberately passed by the schoolroom on the way back to his rooms. Pausing for a moment outside the partially open door, he watched as Miss Brown spoke to his son, feeling hot anger as he learned that the previous governess had been birching his children without his knowledge or permission. His fury had cooled slightly as he watched Samuel throw the switch on the fire, feeling a sense of thankfulness that this new governess was not cut from the same cloth as the previous one.
Perhaps he had underestimated her. Miss Brown was a small creature, quiet and unassuming, but she obviously cared for his children. She realized Samuel’s fears and made it clear she would not be adding to them. Her gentleness towards his twins would earn their respect, he was sure and, despite his misgivings, he was beginning to think that perhaps she would fit in nicely within their household. Hoping she had not heard him, he continued towards his study. He did not want to leave his steward waiting.
The first day had been a success, Sarah thought to herself, grateful to be sitting down at last. The children had been eager to learn and the day had passed in a whirl of lessons, walks in the garden, and time playing in the nursery. Now her duties were over for the day, giving her time to prepare the following day’s lessons. Meg brought in her dinner tray.
“Here you go, miss.”
“Thank you, Meg, I am most grateful.”
Meg smiled; glad to see that the sweet governess appeared happy.
“Twins not too much for you then?”
“I think we have reached a compromise,” Sarah laughed. “They will do their lessons, and then I will allow them some time outside where they may run around, climb trees, and do as they please!”
“Very good, miss. It’ll be nice to see them smiling again.
”
Meg took her leave, her final words giving Sarah real insight. She wanted the children to smile, to laugh, to enjoy their youth. She thought back fondly to her own childhood, the days when she had laughed and played with both her father and mother. Things had seemed so idyllic back then. Shaking herself out of her melancholy, she began to eat, enjoying both the food and the silence.
Forgetting all about his accounts, the duke was lost in his thoughts. He was pleased with the new governess, but something was troubling him, and all attempts to ignore it were proving futile. After she had fainted the previous day, the duke had made a few frustrated noises before deciding he would have to pick her up and carry her to her room. However, her prone form and wet gown had revealed a few bruises on her arms on her pale skin, blue and discolored. They would now be well hidden under her high-necked gown, but it disturbed him immensely that she was carrying these. Letters of recommendation only gave him so much information, and he could not simply ask her how she had received them without humiliating her further; he was at a loss as to what to do. It could be as simple an explanation as a fall from her horse, he mused.
A knock interrupted his reverie, the butler entering to explain that Miss Brown requested a few moments of his time. Nodding and sitting up straight in his chair, he did not find her request an annoyance, realizing he was glad to see her again.
“Miss Brown,” he began, smiling at her as she came in. “What can I do for you?
“Your Grace,” she began, placing her hands behind her back for fear he would see her twisting her fingers as she tried to control her nerves. “If it would not be too much of an inconvenience, I should like to spend some time in the library, if I may? I am in search of some suitable reading material for both myself and the twins.” She was looking directly at him now, and he could see the anxiety on her face, clearly afraid he would be angry at her request.