by Aly Martinez
"You’re not Eli!" I call out, jumping to my feet to follow him.
"I don’t think I am Eli. I just think he’s a selfish son of a bitch in a ‘Hello, kettle. You’re black’ kind of way."
"Why the fuck are you even concerned with Eli? You want me to stop hanging out with him? Fine. Whatever it takes for you to stop acting like a brooding child. Casey is my friend though. I won’t accept you dictating my relationship with her."
"A brooding child? Jesus, aren’t you one to talk!" He laughs manically.
"So, we’re doing it like this, huh? You want to take some stabs at me to make yourself feel better? Go for it!" I swing my arms out to my sides. "But when this shit is over, you’re going to feel worse."
"God damn!" he screams so loud that it echoes off the walls, but I stand my ground.
"There you go. Get pissed. We haven’t broken your dishes yet. Have a go at them."
He shakes his head and begins to crack his knuckles. "I hate you sometimes," he fumes, but his voice cracks at the end.
"I hate you too. But only because I love you so fucking much and you always talk shit about my boyfriend." I cross my arms and give him a pointed look. "I’m not going to sit here and try to fill your head with all the ways that what you did wasn’t wrong—even though it wasn’t. All that matters is how you feel about yourself. You know what I love about our relationship? We can forgive each other anything, but looking at ourselves in the mirror is damn near impossible. So how about this? I’ll love you and you love me. And maybe that will be enough."
"That sounds like a terrible plan," Leo responds, grabbing the back of my neck and pulling me into his chest. "How do you always make things so bearable?" he asks, kissing the top of my head.
"The same way you do it for me. When my vision tunnels, you always find a way to remove the blinders. You also have to remember I’ve been dealing with my shit a lot longer than you have. You should see the hours I’ve logged in therapy. It was my full-time job for almost two years."
He sighs, and I can feel his pulse gradually slowing in his chest.
"Any chance I can convince you to start seeing someone again?"
He laughs.
"Maybe start taking some anti-depressants?" I continue. "I think they would help you a lot."
"Seeing someone, yes. Drugs, no." He releases me but only long enough to grab my hand and guide me back over to the couch.
"Can you at least agree to explain to me why?"
When he lets out an exasperated sigh, I quickly amend my statement.
"Not tonight. Maybe next week. We’ve done enough talking for one Thursday night. Hell, maybe even an entire month of Thursdays."
"Yeah. Next week," he mumbles then places a gentle kiss on my lips.
I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s not going to be that easy to get him to explain this one though.
Emma: So apparently Kara and Hunter are back together. Are you going to freak if she comes to Collin’s birthday party with him?
Me: Jesse’s best friend, Kara?
Emma: Yes
Me: The one who lived with Jesse when I broke into her apartment?
Emma: Yes
Me: Yes, I’m going to freak if she comes!
My phone begins ringing in my hand and I see Emma’s name flashing onto the screen
"Stop," she orders immediately.
"No way. I’m not coming if she’s there," I answer, putting the tape and scissors down.
"You’ve seen Jesse since that night and she married your ex-husband. I figured that would be way more reason to freak than Kara."
"Saying hi to Jesse is a far cry from hanging out with Kara at a twelve-person birthday party. Aren’t y’all doing a party with Brett and Jesse anyway? Invite them to that one."
"Yes, but Hunter and Alex are only in town this weekend. In my defense, I originally invited them to come up this weekend because Hunter was trying to avoid Kara. But apparently she found out he was in town and they got back together last night. I’ve spent the morning listening to him replay their sexual escapades. That girl’s a freak. I really think you’d like her." She laughs, but I find nothing humorous about this situation.
"How the hell, in a city the size of Chicago, does this group seem to be getting smaller and smaller?"
"The cool people have to stick together."
"Maybe Leo and I can just meet you guys at one of those kids’ places next week and do a mini party with just the four of us then."
"Sarah, come on. She’s nice. Plus, I asked her first and she said she would love to get to know you."
"You have no idea how awkward this is going to be for me."
"Oh stop and just promise you’ll come."
"Leo’s already on his way over here. I love the way you spring this on me fifteen minutes before we are supposed to be there."
"Well, I know you. I didn’t want to give you enough time to think of an excuse. Now, tell me you’re still coming. Collin would be so disappointed if you—"
"Fine! I’ll come," I resign and Emma actually squeals.
"Okay! Love you! Bye." She quickly hangs up before I can change my mind.
I toss the phone on the counter, and just as Emma predicted, I begin trying to think of excuses why I don’t have to go.
"Hey, ángel," Leo says as he walks into my apartment.
"Do you think we could make a quick stop at that little Mexican restaurant we went to on our first date?"
"The one that gave us food poisoning? Have you lost your mind?"
"No, it’s just that food poisoning would be the perfect excuse to get out of Collin’s party."
"I thought you were looking forward to this? You made me wait for an hour the other night because you couldn’t find the perfect wrapping paper."
"Hey, if my boy wants trucks, then trucks he shall have!"
He chuckles before leaning in to kiss me. "What’s going on? Why the sudden change?"
"Jesse’s best friend is going to be at the party. She’s dating Emma’s best friend, who’s up from Savannah just for the party."
"Jesus, you people really keep it all in the family."
"Right? That’s what I said."
"You nervous about seeing her?" Leo walks behind me and begins massaging my shoulders.
"I guess. I’m not sure why though. Maybe I’m more embarrassed than anything else."
"When I was in middle school, I had to give this speech in front of the whole class. I got so nervous that, as soon as I opened my mouth, I puked all over my shoes. I know it’s not quite the same thing, but I know you’re a puker, so I just wanted to tell you to at least aim for the carpet instead of my favorite heels."
I bust out laughing. "I think you might be the strangest man I have ever met."
"But it worked, didn’t it?" He kisses my neck and folds his arms around my waist.
"A little bit. Thank you."
"No. Thank you. I plan on fucking you with those heels on tonight. I’m going to need them to stay vomit-free," he responds making me laugh again.
WHEN WE pull up to Emma’s house, the butterflies begin again. Leo doesn’t tell me any more stories, but as we walk to the door, he grabs my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze.
"Just breathe, ángel. I won’t leave your side. I promise."
I tentatively nod and knock on the door.
"Sawah!" Collin screams as soon as Caleb opens the door.
"He’s been waiting for you." He passes Collin over to me and extends a hand to Leo.
"Happy birthday, buddy!" I begin tickling Collin and blowing raspberries on his cheeks.
"Oh God, don’t hype him up any more than he already is. Caleb let him have a cupcake for breakfast," Emma says.
"It was a muffin with a candle," Caleb calls out in defense.
"Oh hush. It had icing. That makes it cupcake," she responds as Collin launches himself into her arms.
"Mommy! Sawah!" he says, pointing over at me.
"I see her. Come o
n. Let’s go put her present on the table." Emma grabs the skillfully wrapped gift from my hand and walks into the other room.
I glance up at Leo to find the oddest expression on his face. I give him a questioning look, but he just shakes his head.
"Hey hey!" I hear Alex greet as he walks into the room.
"Hi." Releasing Leo’s hand, I throw my arms around Alex's neck. I grew up with him, but when I moved to Chicago for college, we lost touch. He’s a quiet guy, but once you get to know him, he is chatty as all get-out. Now that Emma lives here too, Alex and Hunter come to visit quite a bit. I make it a point to see him every time he comes.
"How are you, hon?" he asks warmly.
"Good. Really good," I answer honestly. "Alex, this is my boyfriend, Leo. Leo, this is my old friend, Alex."
"You need a job?" Leo asks randomly, and I can’t help but give him a crazy glance. "You’re a big dude. Seriously. You need work?" He digs in his back pocket and pulls out a card.
"I live in Savannah. That’d be one hell of a commute." Alex grins but tucks the card in his wallet.
"Well, if you change your mind, you give me a call. But yeah, nice to meet you."
I laugh and Leo looks down at me.
"Hey, I need more men. Size is half the requirement in my business."
"Of course." I smile patronizingly.
"Oh. My. God." I hear a woman’s voice I don’t recognize and my stomach drops. Kara. Judging by the tone of her voice, I fully expected to look up and find a disgusted look on her face. However, when my eyes meet hers, she’s not looking at me at all. She’s staring at Leo.
"All right. Girl time!" she announces, walking forward and grabbing my arm.
"Um…I’m good." I tug my arm away and lean into Leo.
He steps between us and very obviously pulls me into his side farthest away from her. "Hi. I’m Leo."
"That was hot," she whispers. "Hi. I’m Kara Reed. Can I borrow your girlfriend for a minute?"
"Kara! Leave her alone!" Emma yells from the kitchen.
"I can’t do that and you know it! I need some answers!" she calls back to Emma.
My pulse begins to race as I nervously slide impossibly closer to Leo.
"Jesus Christ, Kara. They just got here." Emma walks over and hands me cup of punch. "You’re freaking her out."
Kara clears her throat and pointedly tilts her head to Leo.
"Seriously?" Emma laughs.
Kara shrugs unapologetically.
"It’s not what you think," Emma tells me. "She’s not mad or anything."
"Oh God no!" Kara exclaims from behind her. "Shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think…" Her face heats to pink and I begin to feel bad about my reaction.
"It’s okay." I smile weakly while trying to get my heart to slow.
"Come on. We can chat in my room. I need to change anyway. I’m covered in shrimp dip. The mixer just went haywire."
I glance down to Emma's shirt to find it covered in an orange mess. "You made shrimp dip?" I ask in shock and immediate excitement. It’s my favorite, but you can’t find the mix in Chicago. It’s only sold at one of the touristy shops in Savannah.
"Yep. Alex brought some up just for you."
"You still love that stuff, right?" Alex asks, shoving his hands in his pockets.
"Um, abso-fucking-lutely," I quickly respond before Emma scolds me for cussing.
"All right, gentlemen. Food’s in the kitchen. Go eat. Come on, Sarah." Emma turns and walks away with Kara giggling hot on her heels.
"You going to be okay?" Leo whispers in my ear.
"I think so." I stand on my tiptoes to give him a kiss. "However, while I’m gone, I need you to put on a professional face. Go in there, find that bowl of shrimp dip, and guard it with your life. No one touches it until I get back. You got it?" I pat his chest, causing him to grin.
"Yes, ma’am," he answers before whispering into my ear, "Since this is a professional job, I will expect payment in the form of your mouth on my cock later."
"Leo," I chastise.
"Sorry, ángel. That’s the price you pay for professional bodyguard services these days."
"I’m going to check your bills on Monday. I better not find you charging anyone else like that."
He laughs and gives me another kiss before walking away unfazed. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same.
When I walk into the bedroom room, I find Kara rummaging through Emma’s closet.
"Wear this one. It gives you great cleavage."
"Um, I’m not wearing a backless cocktail dress to my child’s second birthday party," Emma responds, pulling an orange T-shirt from her drawer.
"Can I wear it then?" Kara asks.
"Sure, but it would be a floor-length, ass-less dress on you. Hunter would lose his crazy shit."
"Damn it. Why do I have to be so short?" she complains, flopping down on the bed.
"You’re not short. We’re just giants," I say, walking up to her. "Hi. I’m Sarah."
"I’m really happy to meet you again."
"We’ve met before?" I ask, confused.
"Well, kinda. You waved a gun in my face," she says bluntly.
My eyes go wide as I stumble back a step.
"Kara!" Emma scolds.
"Oh my God. I totally did that," I breathe, beginning to feel sick when I catch a flash of her coming home early that day I broke into her apartment.
"No. It’s okay. I swear. Don’t get upset. I was just really worried about you for a while."
"I’m so sorry." I attempt to apologize, but the words lodge in my throat.
"No, stop. I’m just glad to see you doing so well."
"You have to understand. I was a mess back then. I’m not…" I trail off before claiming not to be that woman anymore. I honestly don’t know if I am or not.
"I know you’re not that person anymore," she finishes for me. "It’s been my experience that fuck-hot men like that one don’t do crazy."
My anxiety immediately begins to subside as she mentions Leo. "Leo’s really good at crazy actually." I grin awkwardly.
"Jesse’s been keeping me filled in on your progress over the years."
"Jesse should really learn how to hate me," I respond matter-of-factly.
"Nah. She has this huge heart. She really wants to see you happy. However, if you need her to hate you, just hit on Brett. She’d go nutso on someone over him." She lifts her hands like cat claws and hisses. "She told me you had a new stud. And I have to say she was really freaking right."
"Jesse did not say stud," Emma interjects, causing Kara to laugh.
It’s infectious. I glance down at my feet to try to hide my smile.
"Nah. She said something completely appropriate like ‘attractive.’ I translated it to what she really meant though. I’m a good friend like that. Now, Sarah, tell me where you met that fine piece of meat out there. If Hunter doesn’t get his shit straight, I might be in the market soon. Is there an auction where you can go purchase men like that? Because I have to say I wasn’t sure you’d be able to top Brett, but damn, woman. I think you might have pulled it off," she rushes out and ends with a huge grin.
"Leo is pretty amazing," I answer dreamily.
"Soooo…" Kara drags out exaggeratedly.
"Oh God. Here we go." Emma laughs, sitting down on the bed cross-legged next to Kara.
I look at her warily before glancing back to Kara, who is beaming with excitement.
"I need the vegetable report," she announces shamelessly. "I know we just met and all, but I can already tell we’re going to be good friends. So spill it."
"I can honestly say I have no idea what you are talking about, and judging by your excitement, I’m slightly frightened to know what it is."
"You should be. But I’m with Kara. I’d like to know what Leo’s hiding behind those designer jeans too." Emma laughs and Kara gives her a high five.
"Wait. Are we talking about his dick?" I ask as it dawns on me.
"No. We a
re talking vegetables. But yes, I want you to compare his junk to what vegetable it resembles."
"Are we middle schoolers?" I ask, glancing between the two of them. Their eyes are wide with anticipation.
"No, and please tell me he isn’t hung like one either. That would be such a waste," Kara says seriously.
I have to admit that this is a funny conversation—ridiculous, but still humorous. However, I’m not quite sure I want to be sharing this with a woman I barely even know. Emma and Casey, sure. Women talk; that’s not exactly a secret. But to just come right out and ask the first time you meet someone is freaking weird.
"What’s Hunter?" I turn the tables on her.
"Well, Emma originally told me eggplant. But upon further inspection for the last few years, I’d have to go with one of those huge parsnips."
My jaw drops open at her honesty and also just a little because Hunter’s hot. It’s not right for him to be packing something that big.
"And Caleb’s a—"
"No!" I shout, throwing my hands over my ears. "I’ve known that man for way too long to want to hear what he’s using to give the business to my sister every night."
We all bust out laughing.
"Okay, fine. Let me think." I tap my chin while mentally inventorying the produce department. "I guess I’d have to say one of those long plantains. It’s not exactly a vegetable, but it’s very fitting since Leo speaks Spanish. "
"No way," Kara breathes.
"Really?" Emma asks, standing up on the bed.
"Wait, is it like the really skinny ones at least?" Kara asks for clarification.
"Nope." I laugh.
"Damn," Kara groans.
Emma waggles her eyebrows in my direction. "Impressive."
I shrug and smile. They don’t have to tell me.
"Okay, are we done now, Kara? Did you get all the information required for your report?" Emma asks, but Kara just stares into space with a glazed-over look in her eyes. "Kara!" Emma snaps her fingers in front of her.
"Oh, yeah. Let’s go eat. You got a veggie tray, right?" She makes a show of licking her lips, causing us all to howl with laughter.