Time Will Clean the Carcass Bones

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Time Will Clean the Carcass Bones Page 15

by Lucia Perillo


  climb onto my back and cry wreck it wreck it

  like a frog in the grip of ecstatic amplexus

  — before the UVB exceeds the threshold

  or the chytrid fungus destroys our skin

  or trematodes further encyst in our limb buds

  or the meteor hits and Earth is once

  more wrapped in a cloak of dust.

  2.

  Please accept my regret

  for the frogs that I’ve eaten

  but grant me the gig

  with which I impaled them

  and the words gig and impale

  and especially the splashing through

  the lake edge at night

  searching for eyes!

  There was too much to love about their deaths,

  using the gig like a picador

  stabbing the hump on the neck of the bull

  so the darkness roars and throws down its roses!

  At least, I felt its velvet petals on my cheeks.

  3.

  This year’s Christmas trees are tainted

  with Pacific chorus frogs

  that we’re not supposed to let hop

  out the door. But there’s an easy solution:

  all you need is a jar.

  And the will

  to stick the jar in the freezer

  overnight

  then flush.

  It’s simple, it’s clean.

  No one’s talking about a whale here

  dead in the dooryard.

  Or an aurochs or a quagga.

  4.

  Too late for the golden toads, who vanished

  as soon as the scientists arrived to map out

  their plots. Until it dawned

  on the scientists: they

  were the vector. As in:

  Look for me under your bootsoles.

  You will hardly know who I am or what I mean,

  But I shall filter and fiber your blood.

  But in the village you can still buy

  figurines, for luck — golden toads

  on cell phones and toads on mopeds and toads

  who will serenade you with their mandolins.

  5.

  I don’t have the ending: ask the Vegas Valley leopard frog.

  The dwarf hippopotamus or the giant swan.

  Stag-moose, shrub-ox, passenger pigeon.

  The golden coquí or the short-faced bear.

  When we are gone, may some survivor

  like Mr. Industrious Roach

  evolve enough to hawk our likenesses

  for didn’t we cherish commerce and

  view fortune as a wheel.

  Water Theory

  Now I live where I see water — you pay more

  to see water. Perhaps the eye prefers the subtlety

  of liquid to the commotion of the leaves,

  which right now are yellow and spotted,

  about to spring into the air. Whereas the water

  features nothing falling nothing dying,

  its surface made dark or light by clouds

  as they sweep past — though they too

  decompose when raked by wind, or when the sun

  rides in like a warlord in his jeep.

  Or could be that we prefer the water

  for its resemblance to money, a thin array of coins.

  The gray is common; it’s the glimmer that’s rare,

  as the red semicircle on the blackbird’s wing

  was once prized by native people of the West

  in the absence of the cardinal.

  Two theories. Now I am out of theories.

  Save for one claiming the flat expanse

  is also a stage where the self steps out.

  And we think the feeling of the body

  as hollow as a nutshell or a husk

  is the product of threatening it with many

  cubic yards of sky, not that it’s finally secured somewhere

  to rehearse its final bow.

  Elegy for Idle Curiosity

  I used to ask aloud such things as: why is the moon round,

  buffed only by the chamois cloth of space?

  But now I hold my tongue, or else people start to tap

  apparatuses they’ve strapped to their hips

  as if they were knights. They are knights,

  assailed by the uncertain. When it stands to reason

  that we must be somewhere on the map: the self

  tends to be the only one not knowing where it is.

  No more paddling the murk of pointless speculation,

  wondering whether the force that stirs the whirlpool

  also winds the spider’s web. A person can’t just wobble around

  with her mouth open — it arouses

  the surveillance. Instead we’re supposed to be

  like traffic lights, vigilant in every season.

  No more standing like a chanterelle, spewing out ten thousand spores,

  penetrating the substrate, laying a fiber everywhere.

  Belated Poem in the Voice of the Pond

  Time to snuff the candles of the lily pads.

  The newts that all summer long

  plied thick water with their toe-tips splayed

  have dug their own graves

  in the dust-brown bottom.

  Painted turtles hold their positions

  on a log: they are moon rocks

  detained by the sun.

  The naked trees look muscular

  and when bent by the wind

  they push back

  though their limbs drop off

  little by lot. And this time of year

  inside each branch you can see

  the red fuse, smoldering.

  for Hayden Carruth, in memoriam

  Early December, Two Weeks Shy

  There’s a rectangle of oily substrate where the garden grew,

  a greasy vine impounded by each tomato cage

  someone meant to store in the shed but somehow the months

  just slipped…

  no point to hauling them in now

  since the days will soon be lengthening again, oh slide me in

  to this dark trench on the backward side of autumn

  and then just let me sleep…

  Only the brussels sprouts are lit on their bright leathery tree

  unravaged by the slugs,

  unmildewed by the rain.

  Siphoning the sheen

  off the day’s gray skin,

  not suffering from the season

  though they dwell among the spores.

  Go on, ask how this is possible, however childish it may be

  to address the little green bulbs

  of their undistinguished brains.

  The days will only dim before they brighten;

  other friends have taken to their beds.

  *Speckled and Silver

  I have read a lot of books and most of them I have forgotten,

  in particular one about a man who grew up on a farm

  or was it ranch in Reno or maybe it was Oregon —

  one thing that’s clear is that I read it

  lying on the sofa in the Quince Street house

  while a particular light* washed over me

  that made me realize snow had begun to fall.

  Sometime around December ’97,

  though in the book it was I think spring in ’53:

  as I turned pages I heard the rusty gears

  inside the world also struggling to turn.

  Time folded then like a musty old quilt

  someone had laid me to bed underneath:

  I was reading, or was I dreaming I was reading,

  other duties suspended, badges removed,

  hat on a hook, resignation turned in. All I had to do

  was turn on a light when the blue air thickened.

  That was it: to turn on a light. Either turn

  on the light or just lie there in the dark.<
br />
  My Only Objection

  I hope the weather is good this day

  we celebrate the marriage of Tom and John

  now that it’s legal in this state, though I worry

  I’m pledging to a sorority whose mission

  is making crowns from shiny things

  found on the beach or bought on eBay

  so all the people who are coupled

  can be crowned, but that’s it. Union is king

  and union is queen. And one might feel

  the urge to combat this insistence

  by becoming a drifter. Or by joining everything

  to neutralize the hierarchies

  between the clouds and the jet stream,

  the worm and the dirt,

  one shiny fly and the other

  shiny, shiny fly! Let the green blades

  become one with their holes in the ground, the rootlets

  their nutrients, the ant its labor,

  the fir needle it carries, the ant the path

  it trudges along. Couple the chlorophyll

  and the leaf to the light, the skull

  to the sky, the frog to the lily,

  lily to pond, fly to the frog, yes and even

  the frog to the snake. Let us wed

  our intestines to cake, the dog

  to the bone, spider to web,

  man to man and human to human and

  creature to creature, and creature

  to dust, and all the particles

  to all of the waves and quark to quark

  and vibrating string to vibrating string

  to vibrating string till everything

  hums with being crowned.

  FREE

  Found this old photo album by the road

  in a box that also contained an eggbeater

  and a pair of skates. Its white vinyl cover

  stamped in gold OUR WEDDING —

  first page heavy parchment, rain-rumpled

  but stiff, with spaces for names,

  dates, all the facts

  you would not want to forget—all these

  left blank. But before we rush

  to unhappy conclusions, let me say

  it is not such an uncommon thing

  to not do, filling in blanks

  required in so many ominous settings

  that to require it of love

  may not seem the work of happy gods.

  Who is to say the final vinyl sleeves

  foretell any type of troubled uncoupling

  just because they are empty?

  The inevitable dispersals —

  the wayfarer also ends up by the road —

  and look: he’s whistling. It is natural

  that black turns brown and white goes yellow

  as the atmosphere spins

  against the gold letters. Every object selected

  and carried away as the hawkweed

  turns into a ball of achenes

  at the base of the Stop sign, where the box

  is dissolved by the next season.

  Eschatological

  When the old man said the woodpecker was gone for good,

  I told him no, the experts found one

  down in the bayou, where had he been?

  So big that when men saw it overhead

  they were said to call out for the Lord.

  We must not think the worst of the world, I said

  because the old man could be a grumbler, one of those

  who say that mankind feeds on what is beautiful

  and excretes shopping malls

  (well he has never had to buy a curler).

  But now the experts have retracted their discovery

  and it’s the old man who’s gone for good

  and the one thing that endures it seems:

  those sixty-something ivory-billed woodpeckers

  dead in shallow drawers at Harvard

  in the Museum of Natural History. Study specimens

  for which you do not need a natural pose, it’s more

  this thing is dead, let’s not pretend we didn’t kill it.

  Bird after bird — and your heart ambushed

  by their conformity when one by one

  those drawers come rolling out.

  Suddenly they’re smaller than they were.

  And how do you explain the parallax?

  No, you cannot, so roll the drawer back in.

  A Little Death, Suitable for Framing

  T (the Nobel laureate)

  warns us to be on the lookout

  for a tailor,

  not the Reaper.

  We will know him by his well-made

  but shabby suit.

  And the sharp implement he carries

  turns out to be a needle.

  In the gloaming we might see its tip,

  a speck of light

  created by the moon.

  Its long thread, of course,

  will not be visible.

  Until he gets up close.

  Etiology of my illness (I ran the nature center near the city, so

  the cause could be the boy or the river or the snakes —

  all of them left a musky grease on my skin.

  The garter snakes’ teeth left tiny red pinpricks;

  I liked to show off my not-flinching when they bit me on the arm.

  All of them left a greasy musk on my skin,

  starting with the boys, with their pleas and their diseases.

  I liked to show off my not-flinching when they bit me on the arm

  in those days when we thought penicillin or abortion could fix all scenarios

  starting with the boys, with their pleas and their diseases.

  No one worried much about the porous membranes

  in those days when we thought penicillin or abortion could fix all scenarios —

  fat chance. I tried to prove myself by swimming far into the river.

  No one worried much about the porous membranes

  even as the body-boat let down its gangplank for the germs.

  Fat chance I proved myself by swimming far into the river

  whose water’s clean now, though its bed was found to be a little toxic still.

  Even as the body-boat let down its gangplank for the germs

  the garter snakes’ teeth left tiny red pinpricks.

  Now my bed is clean, but the snakes were found to be a little toxic. Still:

  the cause could be the river or the boy who dropped me on my head.)

  Rotator Cuff Vortex

  for Tim Kelly

  When the TV played above the bar, I faked my interest in the game —

  it was the bodies that I wanted to tell the stories. Like the story

  Tim told of Darryl Stingley: there was a photo of him playing

  in his obituary, leaping for the football

  in a perfect arabesque (this before the hit that cut

  his spinal cord). On Friday nights, Tim and his friends throw

  the Vortex ball in the bookstore parking lot, although Tim threw

  his shoulder out, and now the game

  is on hold until the surgeon finds the time to cut

  Tim’s rotator cuff and reattach the fittings. The body tells a story

  mostly about loss (all, in Stingley’s case). And still the ball

  exerts a pull: the men strain toward it when the TV’S playing,

  transfixing the dog as well, who goes crazy playing

  fetch, and will retrieve as long as anyone can be coerced to throw,

  a drive inbred and neural, although the ball

  is, in the dog’s case, a stand-in for some specimen of game —

  by what gene does the compulsion travel? In the epic story

  of the Maya, the heroes get their necks cut

  by the wings of bats down in the underworld, so that their cut

  heads can bounce off the hips of the death-lords playing

  what is simply ca
lled “the ball game” — naturally, the story

  ends with the heroes resurrected, then thrown

  into the sky to become the moon and sun. Scholars call the game

  a way of ritualizing war, blood not entirely averted by the ball

  since the losers were beheaded, skulls racked like bowling balls

  in the upperworld arena. I have seen depictions of this cut

  into the stones of Chichén Itzá, where you can hear the game

  still roaring from the dusty court, although the playing

  died five hundred years ago. Also carved there is the throne,

  or chacmool, and the king lounging on it, though this story

  is debated: could be any doofus spectating. And what’s the story

  behind his enthrallment with the ball —

  do all round things have gravity, no matter if they’re thrown

  by men or spin of their own accord in space, orbs cut

  from bigger orbs in a motion picture that’s been playing

  ever since The Bang? And we take our minuscule positions in the game.

  Forever after, Stingley sat in the throne of his chair, uncomplaining,

  probably dumbstruck: your old life cuts out and a story takes over

  that’s all a game played by the ball on your neck.

  Message Unscripted

 

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