She ignored my remark about the adoption. “John’s a good man. A great man. He loves me. He loves all of us. You’re mistaken,” she said in a voice so soft I had to strain to hear every word. “Well, I’ve said my piece about the subject. I won’t bring it up again.” Pathetic, I thought to myself. I was almost glad she wasn’t my real mother now. I didn’t want to be anything like her. I headed toward the door and then looked back. She was still standing there staring at the floor. “Just tell me one thing.”
She refused to make eye contact with me.
“Why won’t you stand up to him?”
She remained very still for a few moments before making any kind of response. “I trust him.”
Chapter 12
I shivered as I opened my eyes. The chill of the night felt as if it had crept into my bones as I huddled my arms around my stiff body. Piles of snow were heaping all around me. I squinted as my burning eyes seemed to refuse to open revealing how tired I still was. I could see that most of my car was now covered with snow also. My hand fumbled around blindly in the air until it felt the dangling keys sticking out of the ignition. The car whined from the cold as it finally gave in and started, and I waited for it to warm up before I could blast the heater.
I had fallen asleep in my car. I was sitting in an abandoned parking lot of a boarded up building that had once been a local grocery store before the main stream of commercial food places pushed their way into town and bullied the local companies out of business. I pulled my coat around me tightly. Somehow while I slept, it must have fallen off of my shoulders, and it too was cold from lying on the seat beside me.
The air shooting out of the heater felt warmer. I sighed relief as it hit my skin. I turned the knob to high and just sat there, trying to stretch out my rigid limbs. I tried to clear my mind, too. Hadn’t I had a strange dream? Oh yes, I remembered, it had been about Emry. I smiled. It wasn’t strange at all. It had been wonderful. We had been lounging on the sparkling beaches of Evadere, his arms wrapped around me. I laughed at the irony of it all. I had first thought that he had only imagined such a place, and here I was recreating it in my mind. I felt my heart ache suddenly as I realized how much I longed to be near him again, to touch his perfectly smooth tan skin again and feel the warmth of his breath on my neck. I closed my eyes and tried to hold still, waiting for a numbness to come on to block out my misery of being forcefully separated from him. Then I remembered my mother crying on her knees in my father’s office telling me that I was not their child. And the numbness came then, another sort of pain but less severe and different from the one I felt when thinking of Emry. This I could tolerate, and so I allowed myself to continue feeling it.
The heater began to thaw me out as I thought about how I had gotten to the point of falling asleep in my car in the middle of nowhere in the first place. My eyes shifted to across the street. Just almost out of sight behind a line of barren trees I could see the edge of Buck’s driveway. I hoped he hadn’t come home while I was asleep. I looked at the green glowing numbers on my dashboard: 10:21p.m. I had been asleep for almost an hour, and the snow had fallen heavily between now and then, too.
Great, just great, I thought to myself as I made sure my boots were on tightly. I reached in the backseat for the ice scraper. I exited the vehicle and began to clean off the front windshield. The night had suddenly become very peaceful and calm. There wasn’t a single snowflake in the sky, and there were no clouds. It was clear and brisk, the moon shining down bright against the blinding snow. Even the abandoned parking lot looked serene and beautiful, renewed by the fresh coat of white it had just received.
Out of the edge of my vision, I saw taillights heading up the driveway leading to Buck’s house. My heart skipped a beat as I felt a sense of urgency rush over me. My hand brushed off the snow in long, rapid motions as I headed to the back of the car and cleaned off the rear windshield as well. I looked down at my boots as they sunk into the snow. A couple of inches had to have fallen at least I guessed. I finished up the car and hurried back inside to the warmth. I shuddered, my eyes glued to edge of the driveway. I wasn’t sure how this was all going to go down tonight. I wasn’t even sure if I had a plan.
My mother had told me that the whole group was going to be meeting tonight, which had led me here to his creepy lot where I could be hidden as well as be able to see Buck at the same time. I had hoped that he would come home first to change out of his police uniform before going to meet up with Mrs. Anderson and the rest of the group, and I was glad I had been right. I was also glad that I hadn’t slept any longer or else I would have missed his coming home at all. Now I had to wait until he had changed and somehow follow him to this meeting. That was all I knew for now. When I got there, I had no idea what I was going to do then. Being a stalker didn’t come easily to me. Too much anxiety was attached to it.
My mind shifted to Emry again. The whole thing angered me. They thought he was pure evil, and I thought he was pure heaven. I wondered when I’d be able to see him again. It was too painful to even consider that it would be never. It was something I just wouldn’t allow myself to accept. Things couldn’t end where they had between us. Life wasn’t that cruel. Was it? Everything else was falling apart around me. Surely Emry was the only solid thing I had left to grasp onto. He was the only thing I had going for me now, my only sense of belonging, my escape from the bitter reality of realizing that nothing else in this world had been real up until now. The aching returned in my heart. It hurt so badly I was struggling to breathe. Whatever it took, I had to find something out tonight or the chance might be lost forever, the chance for Emry to be freed from those bars that locked him inside, away from the rest of the world, and also from me.
I saw the first traces of headlights coming back down the driveway. Buck had changed quickly. Perhaps he was running late. Without stopping, his vehicle pulled out onto the road and drove away in the opposite direction from where I was. I began to panic slightly as my mind raced with what I should do. I started to count slowly in my mind. How many seconds should I let pass before pulling out behind him? I had to keep some sort of distance or he would know something was up. No one would be on the roads tonight with all the snow that had just accumulated on the ground. But then I thought I should probably just go for it right now. I couldn’t risk the chance of him getting too far ahead where I couldn’t see him turning off and not be able to know where he went.
My foot pressed down on the accelerator. I felt the snow underneath my tires as I pushed harder on it and began to slide slightly. I made it out to the road, relieved I hadn’t gotten stuck, and attempted to be alert and cautious, although the aching along with the exhaustion that I was feeling was a weary combination.
Where was Buck? I couldn’t see him at all, but then I realized that I could just follow his car tracks. This wasn’t going to be as difficult as I thought, and it was more discrete this way as Buck couldn’t see a car behind him at all. I’d raise no suspicion.
I followed the tracks for what seemed like endless miles as the roads were very slippery, and I tried to be cautious so I wouldn’t end up in the ditch. I hadn’t seen any other cars on the road at all. It was almost 11:00 p.m. before Buck’s tire tracks darted off to a section toward the outskirts of Seneca. I began driving down a familiar back road. It led directly toward Mrs. Anderson’s house. It was the same road that Buck had gotten the flat tire on the day we caught my father with Mrs. Anderson on her front porch. I felt my heart speed up. Of course this is where they would meet, I thought. It shouldn’t be that much of a surprise. Her house was the perfect location, out of the way and private. She lived alone. Perhaps even her sons had been let in on what was happening. It was just so nerve racking to be here again. I didn’t like the feeling this place gave me.
I remembered there was another lane just before Mrs. Anderson’s main driveway. I assumed it had been created for another access for farm equipment to get up to the fields. I pulled my car into that lane. It had a lit
tle hill to it as I reached the top, and then I felt my tires sliding as I began to go backwards down the hill. I pressed the brake, and the back end of the car fishtailed to the side of the lane. I pulled the emergency brake. The car lurched to a sideways stop. I took a deep breath and decided against trying to start over again at the bottom of the lane, afraid I’d get myself stuck for sure. At least this way I was fairly certain I could get back out of here.
I began piling on layers of clothes and winter garments, finishing off with a heavy pair of gloves, a thick wool hat and a fuzzy warm scarf. I twisted it around the back of my head and tied it in a gigantic knot, securing it into place. I was wearing almost all dark-colored clothes. I felt around under my seat for the flashlight that my father had insisted I keep in my car, grateful that it was still there. I turned it on. It worked. I shoved it in the front of my coat pocket and my keys on the other side.
Well, are you ready to do whatever it is you’re going to do tonight? I asked myself. I pictured Emry’s face in my mind again, his arms around me as he had been in my dream. I let the painful emotion that followed come on for a moment before jumping out of the car and quietly shutting the door behind me.
The night was so serene without any wind that it was eerie. There was always wind in Seneca. I could even hear my footsteps crunching into the old snow underneath the new, the old frozen solid. I cut through the little patch of woods toward Mrs. Anderson’s house. I didn’t even need to use my flashlight. The moon provided enough light to see what was in front of me.
I rounded the corner of the driveway and crossed over onto the piece of land in front of her house instead of walking any farther down the actual driveway. I found an old, broken down tractor that had been rusting away for years sitting a few yards away and ducked down beside one of its massive tires, knowing that the house was directly in front of me now. I got down on all fours and stretched my neck out far enough to get a good look at what was going on inside the house. Not a single light was on. It sat in front of me still and dark. No one was there? My thoughts began to swirl. Had I missed where Buck’s tracks had gone? No, I was certain he pulled in here. And there had been fresh tire tracks going to the lane that I had walked across.
I stood. There were no cars parked in front of the house either. I clenched my fists inside the gloves. I tried to think of my next move. My eyes searched all around the house as I walked up to it now, only feet away from the front porch. I headed to the side of the house to where the tracks were. I began to walk along them, my feet leaving prints where the lines were. It led to the back of the house and then up another small hill toward the woods. Buck had driven back here and then into the woods.
My thighs burned from the vigorous exercise of climbing the hill in the deep snow along with the layers of clothing weighing me down. I hoped I wasn’t going to have to run away from anyone tonight. I would surely lose the battle if that were the case at the speed I was going now.
I was huffing and puffing, my lungs burning from the cold inhalations when I finally reached the top of the hill and walked forward through the woods to a clearing. I could now hear plenty of noise, people yelling and others clapping their hands together. A haze of smoke lifted up into the clear, starry sky of the winter night as a large bonfire blazed in the middle of the field. A large group of people were gathered around it, their backs to me as they all faced something, someone. I stared in astonishment at the scene before me. What were they doing out here in the middle of the night shouting, and it sounded like almost chanting, at each other? And then my eyes caught sight of something else, something shiny above my head. Hanging from the barren, icy tree branches were large pieces of metal that twinkled as they turned and mirrored the reflection of the fire. They were round and had two diagonal lines going through them. They were everywhere. I had no idea what kind of symbol it was, but they made a circle around the field, around the group of people standing in the opening of the field.
I realized suddenly then that I was exposed. The trees I was positioned behind were thin, and the moon was too bright along with the fire that I couldn’t stand here forever and not expect to be seen. I quickly searched for a place to hide. I scanned through the trees in fear, praying that there was somewhere I could hide after making it this far.
Through the trees to my left, I caught sight of a rock large enough that I thought I could stoop behind. I looked back to the group of people in the clearing. They seemed to be focused on whatever was going on in front of them. I made a mad dash for it, not giving it a second thought. It was now or never. My boots made loud noises with every step as I crunched snow and broke icy branches and twigs beneath my feet. I didn’t bother looking over to see if anyone was watching. I couldn’t. My lungs felt like they were going to explode when I finally reached the rock and pressed my back against it, trying to catch my breath and calm down as I allowed myself to slide down it and just sit there for a moment. I could hear the voices chanting in unison now, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying. When I decided to peek out from behind the rock, I expected someone to be standing there looking back at me. There was no one there. I had made it safely, unnoticed.
The group of people were now circling the bonfire, their arms held high in the air as it seemed they were trying to make their voices carry into the sky. What were they doing? Singing? I thought. Was that a hymn I recognized? I strained my ears to try to catch the words, but they were so loud it was as if their voices mumbled together.
“Silence, everyone!” I heard someone yell out clearly above the rest of them. They all stopped moving at once and edged away from the fire, their backs still facing me as someone came down the middle of the group, coming closer to the fire. It was a woman. She was bundled up in just as many layers of winter clothing as I had, but sticking out from the hood overtop of her head was a white lace shawl. Mrs. Anderson.
“I would like to thank everyone for coming on this cold winter’s night!” she yelled out, her arms held toward the sky as she did so. “I would like to thank Mr. Barnabas for starting out the ritual so powerfully!”
Mr. Barnabas. I recognized the name right away. It was an older gentleman that went to our church. I felt my stomach getting sicker by the minute as I listened to her words. Ritual, power. It was a modern day witch hunt, only it was as if they were the ones using black magic here. My eyes scanned the men as I searched for my father, but they were all so close in height and all wearing heavy coats and hats. It was impossible to single him out from the rest of the group.
“All of you have been handpicked to save our beloved Seneca, and you were called here tonight to replenish the sanctity of the ritual!” Mrs. Anderson then shouted something out that I couldn’t understand. Everyone else seemed to understand what she had said, and they all raised their arms up high along with her.
Another man came forward, standing next to Mrs. Anderson. He was carrying a large wooden pole in each hand, both with circles on the very top.
“These represent the two that have already been found!” she screamed out. “These represent the Satan worshippers! We can’t have these men in Seneca teaching our children the works of the devil!” “No!” some of the people shouted back in agreement. “We have to rid ourselves of these dark enemies!” Mrs. Anderson said. “This one!” She pointed to the one in the man’s right hand. “Lucas Banesberry, he was powerful in his works. But this one,” she yelled out while pointing to the other circle on the wooden pole. “Emry Logan, he is even more dangerous than Lucas Banesberry. He possesses an even greater power and even more intelligence. It’s something I’ve never seen before. We must make sure, my friends, that he never escapes or a great evil will come over all of us, and we shall all be doomed.” All of the people shouted in agreement. “You see, I believe he knows not the extent of the dark power within him. We mustn’t give him opportunity to explore it. We must make sure he is locked up behind bars forever, never to be free!”
More people yelled out.
�
�You are the strong ones of this town. You are the leaders. You have to take control of your town. You have to rid the world of people such as Lucas Banesberry and Emry Logan. No matter what it takes, my friends, Emry Logan cannot be set free!”
“Cannot be set free! Cannot be set free!” they shouted in unison and agreement. Another metal ornament turned slightly above my head, and I looked up at it curiously as it revolved. I was unnerved and frightened. Mrs. Anderson was crazy. It was as if she had all of these people under some sort of spell of her own. These were respectable, probably most of them Christian, men who were out here in the middle of the woods shouting back at some crazy, old woman who lifted her arms to the sky and hung weird metal objects from the trees. These were her followers. My stomach began to churn. I knew I shouldn’t be here. I was putting myself in grave danger. If I were to be seen, what would she have them do to me? Kill me? I wouldn’t put it past her at this point. My mother said she knew things. Did she have some sort of strength as well? She was making these people hate Emry, but for what reason exactly? There had to be a motive.
I felt a chill go up my spine. I figured that even if this had been the middle of summer, I probably still would be getting chills just by being here. Mrs. Anderson had a strong influence over this group. Even my father was under her spell. They should be throwing her behind bars for her practice of witchcraft.
“Throw them in the fire!” she commanded the man still holding up the poles. “Throw them in! This is how you destroy evil! You burn it up and watch it wither to nothing!”
The man tossed the wood into the fire. I watched the two round circles representing heads, I supposed, curl up first and burn in the flames and then the two poles stood there burning as well. “Only you can seek out the evil and destroy it! Be courageous, my friends! You can’t let Emry Logan out! Never let him out of the cage he so rightly deserves to rot in for the rest of his life!” Mrs. Anderson held her arms upwards to the sky again. Everyone repeated the action in the same fashion as her. “Drink up, my friends!” She pulled something out from within her coat and outstretched her arm to the fire. “Drink, be filled with peace, and go!”
Strange in Skin Page 19