by L. J. Fine
For the first time since she entered the bar, a genuine emotion overtook her expression. Desperation. And maybe a little fear. This time when she spoke, the wobble finally entered her voice and her hands trembled as she wrung them together in front of her.
"Frank is dead. He died about a month ago. Cancer." A sad, watery smile spread her lips. "So, you see, now I have no one. As selfish and uncaring as you believe me to be, I had been keeping tabs on you throughout the years. I knew that you were all still here in this town, and I knew that you were doing well for yourselves. I thought that it was time I came home. Time that we became a family again."
A gruff laugh sounded off behind her and Marie turned to see Tyler with an incredulous smile on his face. "I'm sorry, but you have to be fucking kidding, right? What would make you think that we wanted you back in our lives after all this time? Just because you lost the tribe you abandoned us for doesn't mean that you can come running back here and expect us to be all fine and dandy with it. I'm sorry for your loss, really, but you need to fuck off. We have each other and, in case you didn't notice on the way in, we're building our own family into something damn beautiful." He shook his head. "Our mother left us a long time ago and she has been dead to us ever since."
"He's right," Ben said putting his arm around Emma's waist. "We don't want or need you here. This is all too little, way too late. And it's still you, being as selfish as you ever were. It has nothing to do with us or your feelings for us, if you even have any. You need to get out. Maybe stop being so damn selfish and you might find a family of your own. But you burned your bridges with this one."
The tremble in her lips ceased and she sniffed once as she tilted her chin into the air. "Fine. If that's how you feel about it, then I'll leave. But I want you to know that I'll be staying at the motel in town for a while if you decide to see reason and change your mind."
With that, she sashayed out the way she'd come in, and the sound of the door slamming echoed behind her. Marie let out a long, pent up breath that she felt like she'd been holding since Janice walked into the bar. Turning to face Adam, she ran her hands up his forearms to his elbows. "You okay?"
"Honestly? I don't know." Blinking, he looked down at her as though coming out of a daze, then turned to address his brothers. "Did that really just happen?"
"Yeah man," Brandon said, shaking his head and slumping against the bar like the wooden surface was the only thing holding him up. "That was our deadbeat mother. Never thought I'd see her again, but I'm glad she's gone."
"What the actual fuck, though?" Adam moved out of Marie's reach and folded his arms across his chest. She felt the loss of his warmth in more ways than only the physical, and she tried not to read too much into it. Right now, she could only guess at the thoughts running through his mind as he sorted through everything he was surely feeling. "What do you think she really wanted?"
Tyler moved back toward the garbage bag he'd dropped when their mother walked in and picked it up. "Money, a place to stay. Who the hell knows? But whatever it is, it sure as shit wasn't in our best interest, I can tell you that. We're better off that she walked right back out that door."
Adam nodded distractedly and Marie could see the thoughts flying a million miles an hour behind his dark eyes. She wanted to touch him, pull him into her, hug him. Something. But she didn't dare move. Didn't know if he'd willingly receive any kind of comfort from her.
"I need a drink." Straightening up to his full height, Brandon went behind the bar. "Who else wants one? We can clean the rest of this shit up later, Tyler. Take a pause."
Tossing the garbage bag back down onto the floor, Tyler took Mina's hand in his and joined his brother at the bar. Ben and Emma were already seated on a couple of stools and Kim moved alongside her husband cracking open beer bottles. Adam ambled over to them all without so much as a look in Marie's direction, so she awkwardly put her hands in her pockets and followed him. She picked a stool at the edge of the bar, but instead of sitting down next to her, Adam went around by Brandon to grab a bottle of tequila and eight shot glasses. Lining them up on the bar top, he poured down the row, filling each of them to the brim.
He distributed the shots, saving the last two for himself and Marie. Sliding the glass across to her, he focused only on his motions, never lifting his eyes until he turned back to his brothers. "This night wasn't supposed to be about that woman, and despite the fact that she turned up here, it still shouldn't even remotely be about her." He raised his glass in the air and put a smile on his face that Marie could see didn't reach his eyes. "I'm proposing a toast, just among us, our real family, to Tyler and Mina. You're the ones we're here for, and you're the ones we are celebrating. Prayers go up and blessings come down."
"Here, here!" Brandon slapped the bar with his free hand as they all clinked their glasses together and downed their shots. Laughter and cheers followed as everyone seemed to follow Adam's lead and act as though their mother had never been there at all.
The liquor burned as it went down, and Marie got to experience the pleasantness of it for all of half a minute before Tyler declared them all lazy asses and they all got back to cleaning.
The car ride back to their apartment building was a quiet one. Adam's light and carefree mood of earlier had disappeared, and Marie didn't know what to say to him. He seemed completely disinclined to talk about any of the events of the evening, and every time Marie tried to start a conversation, he would answer in one- or two-word sentences.
He remained quiet in the lobby, then the elevator and the awkwardness Marie felt only grew until it became a thing of substance and weight between them.
She dug her keys out as he walked her to her door, and before she could slide the key into the lock, he stopped her with a hand to her elbow. The first time he touched her since his mother walked out of the bar. She turned to face him and saw some form of indecision waring over his features.
"I'm sorry, I'm being an ass and kind of shut down on you. I don't mean to go all quiet and stoic, but there's a lot on my mind right now." Shoving his hands into his pockets, he looked at her with pleading eyes. Maybe imploring her to understand?
"No, you don't need to be sorry. A bomb went off tonight and I completely get it." Her hands ached to reach out to him, but she still got the sense that any kind of comforting touch would be unwelcome. "Do you want to talk about it? I have a bottle of red, two glasses and all the time in the world."
That, at least, earned her a smile, albeit a small one, but she'd take it. "I appreciate the offer, darlin', but maybe I can take a rain check. I think I need to be alone for a little while, clear my head and get out of this funk. Is that okay?"
Was it okay? Was it really a good idea for him to be on his own after something like this? But he needed what he needed, and she could give him time. After all, if he changed his mind and decided he did need her, she was literally only a few inches of drywall away.
"Yes, absolutely. I'm right here, though." She caught his gaze and held it steady with her own. "I'm not going anywhere."
"Good," he said. Not a tease, not a joke and no smirk in sight.
He leaned down and brushed his lips against hers, tender and sweet, but not lingering like normal. "I'll call you tomorrow, baby. Goodnight."
"Goodnight," she whispered as she watched him walk away.
CHAPTER TWELVE
The hours ticked by while Marie tried not to notice. She attempted to keep herself busy. Do a little spring cleaning and not look at her phone every five minutes to check to see if he'd called.
Because of course he didn't. Sunday slowly bled into Monday and still she heard nothing from him. She even took a personal day just in case. And because she knew she wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything else all day, anyway. By mid-morning, she couldn't take it anymore. She needed to hear from him. So, she called him.
No answer.
Well, maybe he was in the shower or something and couldn't get to his phone. With that hunch in mind, she
stopped moving, didn't even breathe, and listened. She heard nothing. No water running, no TV. No pitter patter of The Captain's paws. Nothing.
Blowing out the breath she'd been holding, she paced her living room. This was ridiculous. Surely everything was fine. She was acting like a crazy person.
Still, she couldn't stop her mind from imagining the worst.
Adam had been damaged by what that selfish woman, who called herself his mother, had done to him. His whole family all had been. He had built up walls of his own that he'd maintained for years after she abandoned them. Marie had just beaten through those walls. Hell, they had each torn down the other's barriers to finally get close to another human being and then she shows up. Marie didn't even want to even contemplate where Adam's head was at right now. It scared her too much to think of the kind of emotional regression he might be going through, putting all those walls firmly back into place one by one. It scared her to think of where that might leave them. But damn it, she wasn't going to sit here all day in her apartment like a coward. She couldn't. She'd given him enough time, and now she was going to see him.
Stuffing her feet into her purple fuzzy slippers by the door, she left her apartment and walked the two feet over to his. She pounded on the door. The sound of her fist cracking against the hard surface echoed down the hallway, reminiscent of that fateful night months ago when she wanted him to shut the hell up. Unlike that night, most of their neighbors were at work so she didn't feel near as bad to be causing such a raucous.
Once again, no answer. No sexy, half-naked man to open the door and banter with her. She stood stalk-still in the hallway and listened. No other sound but her breathing, not even the rustle and yips of The Captain on the other side of the door.
Where was he? And how had she missed him leaving? Rushing back to her apartment, she put real shoes on and checked her phone in case he had called her back while she was in the hallway. Seeing no messages or missed calls, she threw her coat on, grabbed her keys and went out the door.
The car bounced as she pulled into the gravel parking lot of Abel's. Only the other night she had begun to get reacquainted with the Serano clan, so she didn't have any of his brother's phone numbers. Thankfully, she saw a truck out front and prayed to God that it belonged to one of them. She had to note, though, that she didn't see Adam's Charger anywhere and that could only mean that he wasn't here. But maybe one of his brothers had heard from him.
The door was open, so she entered the bar and took a look around. Brandon looked up from the laptop he'd been typing on at one of the tables closest to the stage. The surprise all over his face didn't bleed much into his voice, for which she was grateful. "Hey, Marie. Whatcha doing here? Little early on a Monday for a drink."
Immediately, she felt a little foolish for barging in on him like this, but she was desperate and didn't know what else to do. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm glad I caught you. This might seem a little nuts, but I'm starting to get worried. Have you heard from Adam? He's not home and not answering his phone."
A frown marred Brandon's handsome face as he fished his phone out of his pocket. "Not since we all left after the engagement party. After what went down, we're all kind of keeping busy with business as usual."
"See, that's the thing." She ran a hand through her hair and moved closer to his table. "Normally, I wouldn't be this neurotic, but after what happened..."
Nodding, he tapped a button on his phone and pressed it to his ear. "No, I get it. I'm calling him now."
Part of her would feel relief if Adam answered for Brandon but, man, the other part of her? It really wouldn't make her feel great to know that he was avoiding her.
After a few minutes, Brandon shook his head and hung up and Marie didn't know what she felt. Panic maybe. Where was he?
A few more phone calls to his brothers later with no more answers than when he started, Brandon pushed his chair back from the table and stood. "Tyler and Ben haven't heard from him and he's not picking up for them, either. There are only two other places I can think of where he might be. At the gym, which would explain why he's not answering his phone. Or at the farmhouse. Though fuck knows what he'd be doing there on a Monday when the entire work crew is there gutting the kitchen. It's not like that would give him much opportunity to think."
"Maybe that's the point," Marie said chewing on her bottom lip. "I don't think he's at the gym, though. I would have seen him there when I left our building."
Brandon shook his head. "He goes to Tyler's gym sometimes when he needs to lose himself. We all do. There's strict access to that place so not a lot of distractions or people to bother you."
He must not have needed that kind of seclusion for a while, then. She would have noticed him disappearing a few hours here and there, especially in the last month or so. Maybe she had kept him good and distracted. At least, until now.
"That's a good place to start. For obvious reasons, you should go to the gym and I'll head over to the house. Hopefully, one of us will find him and report back to the other."
Plans made, Brandon locked up the bar and they each started off in their assigned directions.
When she pulled off onto the narrow road that led up to the farmhouse, the place was suspiciously empty. She double checked the time. 11:17 a.m. The crew would not have gone to lunch yet, but the old house stood still and quiet against the gray sky, a sky that grew darker by the second. Instant relief flooded her when she spotted the Charger parked in a haphazard slant in the driveway. But where was everyone else? No other vehicles lined the gravel road like they had been for weeks while the crew remodeled the kitchen. They'd gutted the room, pulling out all the battered cabinets and the chipped linoleum. Now came the tasks of rewiring and rebuilding. But nothing stirred besides the dust kicked up by her tires as she pulled up and parked next to Adam's car.
Nothing but the sound of the brisk wind rushing through the surrounding treetops hit her ears as she climbed the stairs of the front porch. The screen door screeched as she pulled it back to knock on the solid oak of the front door.
"Adam?" she called when no one answered the door. He had to be here. Why else would his car be out front? She knocked again and when, again, no answer came, she tried the doorknob. It gave way with a twist of her wrist and she went inside.
The tac tac tac of paws moving across hard wood hit her ears a few seconds before The Captain rounded the corner to greet her in the foyer. She knelt down to pet the little dog. "Hey, buddy. Where's your daddy, huh?"
The pug snorted and shook his body when she stood back up. Seeing he would get no more attention for the time being, he walked back the way he came. Marie decided to follow. The only light to guide her way was the dull gray glow filtering through the windows that cast everything into shadows. She rounded the corner into the great room and found Adam passed out on an old mattress laid out on the floor in front of the fireplace. A near to empty bottle of bourbon sat next to him on the floor within easy reach.
Seemed as though he splurged and went for the good stuff last night and, as predicted, it had knocked him on his ass.
"Adam," she called softly, moving further into the room. It had no effect, so she crouched down beside him and lightly ran her fingers against the forearm that he had flung over his head. "Adam."
Jerking awake with a start, he blinked a few times in confusion before his eyes focused and narrowed against the light. He registered her presence for all of two seconds before he groaned and ran both hands over his face.
Wonderful, off to a great start.
"What time is it?" His raspy voice cracked down the middle as the words exited his mouth.
"Almost 11:30. What happened to you last night? Are you okay?" Hugging her arms around her knees, she watched as he slowly sat up. It looked painful, like every muscle in his body had gone ten rounds with a Mac truck. Especially, his head. That he cradled in his hands with care.
He nodded then winced from the movement. "I'm good. Musta got a little carrie
d away, that's all."
"Right, sure. Out in the middle of nowhere. All by yourself." Reaching out, she tapped the side of the bottle of bourbon with her fingernail. "Wanna talk about it?"
Heavily exhaling through his nose, he closed his eyes. "Do I have a choice?"
Ouch. What the hell? "When have I ever forced you to do anything? Of course, you have a choice."
The sharpness of her tone must have penetrated through the fog in his brain because he opened his eyes and trained his gaze on her. "What are you doing here, Marie?"
Damn it, for the second time, ouch. "You fell off the world for a day and half. You weren't home, weren't answering your phone. No one could get a hold of you. I'm here because I wanted to make sure you were still alive. Should I feel bad about that? Because I'll tell you right now that I don't. Not at all. Speaking of which..."
She fished her phone out and sent a quick text to Brandon to let him know that she had found Adam and that he was all right. Mostly.
"Fuck me," he muttered, once again rubbing both hands over his face before pushing his hair back through his fingers. "You wanna know what happened? My fucking mother happened. You remember when I told you before about the women in my life not being trustworthy? That's where it started. Not even right after she left us, either. Part of me still hoped that she would go off, take a trip by herself, get it out of her system and come back to us. All shiny and new. What a fucking asshole I was. When Ben and I went to New Orleans and found her with that jackass, that was it. Like a switch had been flipped and I was done. Not just with her but with women period. I decided right then that I would never trust another single one of you."
Being lumped in with every other woman in this scenario sent a shockwave of uneasiness through her system to sink into the pit of her stomach. He didn't notice her wince, though. He kept on talking.