by Vivian Arend
A slow clap sounded from the doorway, and they all turned toward the sound.
Joel stood there, hands moving rhythmically in approval, but his expression was ice cold as he spoke. “He’s right, guys. It’s not her fault, or the baby’s, that Jesse’s an ass.”
Matt looked sheepish. “Sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. Of course it’s not her fault, but jeez, Jesse, you’ve got shit for brains.”
“Not about Dare or the baby,” Jesse insisted. He wasn’t about to give an inch on this. He swore that none of his family would suspect he was anything but thrilled about his current circumstances, which meant lying his ass off. “They’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I brought her to meet all of you, and if that’s going to be an issue, tell me now so I can turn around and take her home.”
Cassidy waved him down, sliding off the bale to vertical. “You know you don’t worry about that. We’re looking forward to meeting her, and we’re glad you’ve found someone special.”
He held out his hand, and Jesse took it cautiously. Cassidy shook once then used the grip to pull Jesse in close. He spoke quietly under the pretense of offering a quick pat on the back. “You might want to apologize for the leaving bit, though.”
Which was what he’d intended to do before getting distracted, damn it all.
Jesse stepped back. He made eye contact with each man before clearing his throat. “I’m sorry I left like that. It was wrong to hightail it out of here without a word.”
“It was,” Travis agreed. “Stupid, selfish—”
“Travis, when a man apologizes and means it, you don’t keep harping on his stupidity.” Cassidy strode to his partner’s side, laying a hand on his shoulder. “Want to try again?”
“Stop being reasonable. He’s my little brother and he fucked up big time.”
“He said he was sorry.” Matt shrugged. “Okay, Jesse, fine. Thanks for apologizing. I’m still pissed.”
He hadn’t expected much else. “I get it. Hey, how’s Hope and the kid?”
Matt’s expression turned on a dime, the disappointed frown flipping into a beaming grin. “She’s amazing, and he’s trying to walk. Colt climbs like a monkey—almost as bad as you and Joel, according to Mom.”
“Walking? Holy hell, that’s quick.”
“That’s what happens when you’re gone for five months,” Joel drawled. “Things change. Life moves on.”
Ouch. Okay, Joel wasn’t accepting his apology that easily either, and Jesse didn’t blame him. Leaving the family had been hard, but cutting himself off from Joel?
Like severing his own arm.
He’d been the one to cause the pain, and it had nearly crippled him. He had a lot more work to do to repair their relationship, and it wasn’t going to happen this moment, so Jesse turned to Travis instead of his twin. “I see Cassidy’s keeping you on a short leash.”
Travis laughed. “He wishes.”
“Shh, don’t talk about sex around your brothers,” Cassidy said with a wink.
“Oh God, not this again.” Matt pointed a finger at the two of them. “We agreed you’re not allowed to gloat.”
Jesse didn’t know what they were talking about, and the realization hurt. “Why would they gloat?”
Cassidy shrugged innocently. “Matt seems to think we’ve got some kind of advantage over a regular couple because even though Ashley’s eight months pregnant, there’s still sex happening.”
That pile of papers from the evil doctor hadn’t mentioned that detail. He’d read them through a million times, and he would have noticed anything to do with sex. “We can’t have sex when they’re pregnant?”
Travis, Cassidy and Matt exchanged glances before Cassidy spoke again, concern on his face. “Wow, okay, it’s a good thing you came for a visit. Yeah, no sex after she’s…what was it, guys, six months pregnant?”
“Five,” Matt said, blinking harder than usual. “I mean, you can get her off, but no sex.”
Jesse eyed them all, sudden suspicion hitting. “You’re pulling my leg.”
Travis shook head. “No, really. Ask her doctor.”
Only Matt snickered, trying to turn the sound into a cough.
“You’re all a bunch of sick jerks,” Jesse declared.
“As much fun as this is,” Joel interrupted, “I should get going. Who’s dropping me off?”
Matt checked his watch. “Not me. I’m heading over to the bunkhouse with information for the crew.”
Travis groaned. “Fine, I can get you home, but I don’t know why you keep arguing about taking an advance so you can buy a second vehicle for Vicki instead of making us drive you in circles.”
“We’ve spent enough money this year. I’m not dipping into the funds for something we only need occasionally.”
“I can drive you home,” Jesse offered. “I left Dare at your place to get rested up. She’s waiting for me.”
“There, all settled,” Matt said quickly, turning to Jesse. “Hope and I will be around tomorrow night if you want to stop by. She’s teaching a quilting class tonight.”
“Jaxi had planned to have everyone over three nights from now,” Cassidy pointed out. “I guess that’s off, with the baby arriving and all.”
“Ha.” Four voices, simultaneous. All the Coleman brothers eyed each other with amusement because there was no mistaking their commonly held opinion of their sister-in-law.
Travis slipped an arm around Cassidy and led him toward the barn door. “After all this time as a member of the Coleman family, and you still think Jaxi’s going to cancel an event because of a minor detail like she gave birth a few days earlier? Cassidy, Cassidy, Cassidy. You disappoint me.”
“See you there,” Joel said, heading out the door without waiting to find out if Jesse was following him.
The silence as they climbed into the truck was deafening. Jesse waited until he’d backed the vehicle up before attempting to make conversation. “You’re sharing your truck with Vicki?”
“Her car gave up the ghost in April.”
“There’s the old truck we learned—”
“It’s okay. We’ve got it figured out.” Joel stared straight ahead, eyes fixed on the road.
This was hell. It was worse than it had been before Jesse had left. Back then he’d finally managed to put in a full day’s work with his twin without any awkwardness. It was only when he’d bump into Vicki that things would go sideways.
Now to have Joel sit without a word when they were together…
So many things Jesse wanted to share. The new experiences he’d tried, the people he’d met—not all of going out into the world and being a part of a new operation had been bad, and Jesse had grown to appreciate the lessons learned by being a hand instead of one of the family.
He was itching to talk about the shock of finding out he was going to be a father, and he wanted to talk about Dare, and…
…and none of those were things he could share, not even with Joel.
The truth etched another deep scar in his soul.
They were closing in on the turn to the trailer when Jesse impulsively drove past, pulling in next to Whiskey Creek, the river that meandered through the Coleman land. There’d been a barn here at one point—it had burnt to the ground a few years earlier, and Jesse hopped out of the cab to discover the spot had been cleaned up and cleared out. Instead of the mess, a six-foot fence surrounded a garden area with growing green things stood in its place.
Behind him the truck door slammed shut, and he turned to discover Joel marching back up the road toward the trailer.
“Where’re you going?” Jesse called.
Joel stopped dead in the road for five seconds, his back a rigid wall, then stomped on without a word.
Jesse sighed, and went after him. “Fuck it all, Joel, stop.”
His brother whirled, fists clenched by his hips. “Why?”
“Because I want to…”
What he wanted was impossible. He fell sile
nt under his brother’s intense stare.
Joel spat out the words. “Questions like ‘where’re you going’ don’t sit well right now, bro. That implies you give a shit about the other person, and since that’s not true, don’t—”
“Of course it’s true. Fuck it all.” Jesse laid his hand on Joel’s shoulder. “You’re my brother.”
His arm was brushed away by an angry motion on his twin’s part. “Don’t do this.”
Pain struck again. “I apologized for leaving. What more do you want?”
Joel laughed, a bitter sound. “Seriously? You have to ask?”
He caught Jesse by the shirtfront and dragged him close, face only inches away as Joel stared daggers. “You apologized for leaving the family. How about you try apologizing for ripping out my fucking guts? You left, you— You—”
Joel’s expression twisted, and he threw Jesse from him, turning his body to the side and staring over the Coleman land.
It would have been confusing if it weren’t crystal clear to Jesse exactly what his brother was talking about.
He took a deep breath and fought for control. “You’re right. You’re so right. I made a mistake with the family, but I did something worse with you, and I’m so damn sorry, Joel.”
No matter that he’d felt he had to leave, hurting Joel had never been his intention. It didn’t change the issue at the root of the trouble, but this part of it, his sorrow at the consequences, was real.
“I’m sorry,” he repeated again. “For hurting you.”
Joel didn’t move. “Asshole.”
“Jerk,” Jesse responded instinctively, and a hint of smile crossed Joel’s face.
Joel turned and walked back toward the river at a much more reasonable pace. Feet moving as they talked for the first time in ages. “You’ve been lucky. Vicki and I take turns being the reasonable one. When I’m mad enough to spit at the mention of your name, she calms me down and stops me from lighting effigies.”
Inside, Jesse’s guts twisted again. “Vicki stands up for me? What the hell does she say?”
“That someday I’d miss your sorry ass if I track you down to kill you and that she doesn’t want to have to resort to conjugal visits for the next twenty-five years of our lives when I get jailed for knocking your head off your shoulders.”
Jesse snorted.
“Hey, when she gets ranting, it’s all about poisoning you slowly. So you inspire bloodthirsty thoughts in us both.”
“Vicki would get along great with Dare’s sister. She’s keen on poison as well.”
Joel stopped beside a short section of split rail fence, placing a boot on the bottom rung. “Seems weird to think you’ve been gone long enough to have a new crowd of people willing to put you six feet under.”
“We all need a talent,” Jesse attempted to joke, but his brother didn’t crack a smile, so he sighed and went for serious. “She and Dare’s brothers were making the customary welcome to the family death threats.”
Joel’s face twisted for a moment before he brought it under control. “New family, huh?”
God. Jesse’s stomach ached from every bit of sharing he did without telling it all. “I mean, they’re great. They’re hundred percent there for Dare.”
This wasn’t how it was supposed to be between him and Joel. They’d done everything together. Played, and laughed, and learned about life. They’d shared long talks late into the night, and they’d planned their futures, and now when he needed his twin the most, the walls between them seemed insurmountable.
A long, sad sigh escaped Joel. “Enough. I agree with Matt. I’m still mad, but I’m not going to hold this over your head, as long as you don’t ever fucking do it again.”
“Leave without a word? Not likely. Jaxi’s got the bloodhound scent now. I’ll never shake her.”
Joel turned slowly to lean on the fence as he folded his arms and looked Jesse over. “Don’t expect things to go back to the way they were.”
This entire trip was shaping up to be worse than he’d ever imagined. “You hate me that much?”
“I hurt that much,” Joel snapped. “And being mad at you hurts even more because I want to tell you it’s all fine, but it’s fucking not. But I guess we have to try and put it in the past and move on.”
What was Jesse supposed to say? Well, it’s mostly over except for one great big huge thing hanging over my head. The same thing that made me leave in the first place.
Like that would go over well.
“It’s in the past,” Jesse agreed with as much enthusiasm as he could muster.
Thankfully Joel changed the topic, gesturing to the garden area. “Like the changes?”
Jesse nodded. “Seems funny to have the old barn gone.”
“Travis didn’t want it around at all anymore. No lingering reminders for Ashley of the fire, so when we had the excavator out, they stopped off here to clean it up.”
Excavators. “You digging a hole somewhere?”
Joel paused. “On Sunset Ridge. We got our house started.”
A sudden shock went through Jesse for a brand-new reason. Sunset Ridge, where they used to ride as teens and young men, admiring the view and planning where they’d build their homes. Joel to the north and Jesse slightly to the south, next door to each other because they couldn’t imagine being farther away than a stone’s throw at any point in their lives.
They were going to end up a hell of lot farther than that, and the screw inside tightened again.
“Good for you,” he forced out.
Building a home beside Joel was another thing he wouldn’t be doing. Another step away from his family…and he couldn’t complain. He’d taken the first steps down this path all on his own, and it’s not as if he could go back in time.
The truth hurt, and the familiar sensation of being alone enveloped him.
He gritted his teeth and set his resolve. He had to make it through this damn visit with Dare, and then they could go back to Heart Falls.
Her home would have to become his.
Chapter Thirteen
It was her own fault for not asking more questions before getting into the big truck that Vicki herded her in. Dare was already in the passenger seat and they were headed down the highway before details regarding this “great idea” of Vicki’s were shared.
“There’s not much use in hanging around here until Jesse gets back. We may as well go say hi to Marion, and I can help with the kids.” Vicki made a noise. “Not that she’s ever complained about having anything or anyone thrust upon her at the last minute.”
Dare nodded her agreement in a bit of a haze. At that point it was too late to escape unless she wanted to throw herself out the door of a moving vehicle. Although the comment about Marion dealing effortlessly with all the grandkids did register.
Gramma score: +25
Vicki took a quick peek at Dare before focusing back on the road. “I don’t want to be too snoopy, because you’re bound to have a ton of questions thrown at you. So don’t feel as if you have to give out your life story, or anything.” She paused to manoeuver the big truck onto the secondary road before continuing. “Although I think you’re a brave woman to agree to visit for more than a day right off the bat.”
“It didn’t seem that dangerous when Jaxi mentioned it, but I’m reconsidering,” Dare confessed. “I hate to put you and Joel out.”
Vicki waved a hand. “It’s not a bother. We’ve got the room, and it’s not as if you’ll be there all the time. We’ll be lucky to have a quiet evening to ourselves—everyone in the family will want you to come over, and that probably means everyone else who is free will drop in that night as well.”
Dare fought to keep her shudder of dismay from being too obvious. “Did I mention I’m more comfortable in small groups?”
The other woman hummed in sympathy. “Close your eyes and pretend some of them aren’t there? That’s all I’ve got to offer. Sorry.”
“I’ll deal.”
“You
will.” Vicki chuckled. “If it makes you feel any better, I did Thanksgiving dinner for my first ‘meet the Colemans’ event. It turned out fine, once my knees stopped knocking.”
God, that would have been worse. “But did you swear?” Dare managed to tease.
Vicki snorted. “Definitely. At Jesse, if I recall right.”
Ha. “Good thing he’s charming most of the time,” Dare offered in return.
Vicki didn’t respond, her eyes fixed on the road in front of them.
Dare’s nerves were still there, but in a way, Vicki’s story had reassured her. She wasn’t the first person to have to deal with meet the family pressure—heck, Jesse had already survived her brothers. This was just a short-term visit. It’s not as if she had to convince all these people they wanted her around twenty-four/seven forever.
Fields and barns passed by, and as unfamiliar as the area was, Dare swore they were retracing their steps. The trip seemed to take them in a circle back to where they’d started.
“Where do Jesse’s parents live?”
“Across the road from Jaxi and Blake’s. Everyone in the Coleman family plays musical houses. There are five houses and the bunkhouses, and no one stays put for long, although that might change now that everyone’s settling in a bit more. The trailer we’re in has been lived in by Matt, Daniel, Travis and now us. I don’t even know the history before Matt.”
“Silver Stone ranch has got my place, and the main homestead, and everyone else lives in bunkhouses. Although Luke has been building a new place off and on for the last year.”
Vicki offered a smile. “Joel and I are doing that. Well, the building a new place, not the off and on.”
“Really?”
The other woman answered with a lot more enthusiasm, as if glad to have a safe topic again. “We started this spring. The foundation is in, and we hope to get everything on the exterior done by the fall so we can spend the winter finishing the inside.”
“That’s exciting.”
“It is. It’s also nerve-racking, because part of me doesn’t want to take on too much debt, but Joel insisted building is a commitment for the future, and there’s no reason to hold off when we can enjoy it now.”