by R Holmes
These are the moments when I lose the smart, rational thoughts in my head.
Pulling back, he gives me a playful grin. "Lets hang." Another quick kiss to my lips and he pushes off the door and strolls to the couch where Hope stares back at him curiously.
"She's cute," he says, still staring at her like she's grown two heads. I remember what he said last time he was here that he isn't a cat person.
"She makes it easier, you know… being alone," I tell him, walking over to the other side of the couch and resuming my spot. Hope meows and walks over to my lap where she lays back down and promptly goes right back to sleep. I should've named her sleepy instead.
"Seems like you're that for her too, Pres." He nods to her purring in my lap.
"Yeah." I clear my throat. "So..."
"So."
A small grin spreads on his lips, showing rows of perfectly white teeth and I realize how mesmerizing his smile is. How a girl could get lost in everything that is Sebastian.
"What would you be doing if I didn't show up tonight? A normal night for Presley."
"Honestly, I was probably going to order Chinese food and watch a movie. Maybe a bubble bath."
His eyes darken.
"The bubble bath is definitely high on the list of things I'd love to do tonight. Actually, it's the only thing on the list." He gets up and starts walking to the bathroom.
"Sebastian!" I cry, laughing at this playful side of him he’s showing tonight. It's rare that I get to see the fun, flirty Sebastian instead of the broody, moody one.
"C'mon." He walks back and sets Hope onto the floor then scoops me up, bride style and carries me towards the bathroom.
I'm laughing so hard tears are streaming down my face and my stomach cramps. "Okay, stop, stop, put me down!"
He grins. "Nope. Normal Saturday night activities ensue when I'm here."
"No bath. But I will take some chicken and broccoli with an egg roll."
A dramatic sigh leaves his lips and he turns on his heels and carries me back to the couch setting me in the spot he scooped me from.
"Okay fine, but only because sesame chicken is calling my name and I'm a growing boy, I gotta eat."
We settle on the couch once the food is ordered, Sebastian at one end and me at the other. I almost expected him to pull me into his lap, or touch me somehow but he kept his hands to himself when the lights went out and the opening credits came on. We make it halfway through the movie before the food shows up with a hard knock on the door that causes me to jump.
At first my thought is to tell Sebastian to hide. I'm alone at my house with a student, if the person at the door recognizes him, our secret is out. But, I don't voice it. I grab my cash and open the door, blocking the view inside the house. With the lights being out and me partially blocking the door, there's no way anyone could tell it was him.
"Hi." I thrust the money at the lanky teenager on my doorstep. Oily hair, a face full of pimples and braces to go. He doesn't return the smile but just shoves the to go food into my hands and throws a "bye" over his shoulder as he pockets the cash.
I slam the door shut behind him. Jeez.
"Presley," Sebastian calls from the couch. "Bring your fine ass back over to this couch with the goods."
I can't help the giggle that escapes and then I realize that I just giggled. A true, real giggle and it is one hundred percent Sebastian's fault.
When's the last time I laughed so hard I cried?
"You're in no position to be making demands, sir. I secured the bag, but I never said I was sharing."
One side of his mouth turns up in a smirk.
"Oh?"
"Mhm, I mean honestly I'm starving so I could probably eat all of this myself." I walk towards the kitchen and place the paper bag onto the counter.
Before I can even open the drawer, I feel Sebastian at my back. The heat of his body pressed against mine, in every place.
"I think we need a repeat of your classroom, Pres." His hot delicious breath dances along the back of my neck sending a chill down my spine. Goosebumps encase my body, and the counter I was leaning against I'm now clutching in earnest.
My mind drifts back to when he had me laid out on my desk, head buried between my legs and I can't help the flush that works its way from my head all the way to my toes.
"Do you need a reminder of who's the boss in this?" he murmurs. His hands travel down my sides, to my waist where he pulls me back tightly against his body. I can feel how hard he is pressing into my back.
"Foo-food," I stutter trying to focus back on the meal that's going cold in front of us but Sebastian's distracting me with every chance he gets and I'm reduced to a pile of bones at his feet.
"Sebastian," I breathe as his hands slide around to the front of my T-shirt, snaking under the fabric until his rough, calloused hands caress the skin of my stomach. His fingers brazen and strong, brush against the line of my panties, not dipping inside just enough to cause me to shiver.
He disarms me effortlessly. A simple touch. A brush of his lips against my skin.
I'm putty in the palm of his skillful hands.
"Later," he promises, pulling away from me, leaving me breathless, clutching the counter for support. "I can't stop thinking about that sesame chicken," he moans and I whip around from the counter, watching as he bites his fist.
"You are insane." I laugh.
Gathering bowls and utensils, Sebastian stands back silently and watches as I rearrange the utensils in the drawer twice before I'm satisfied with their arrangement.
"Pres." I look up to see his eyes on me. He strides over to where I am, and closes the drawer. He takes the bowls and forks and sets them on the counter and grabs my hand, leading me into the living room.
"Sit."
He walks back to the kitchen grabbing the cartons of Chinese food and two pairs of chopsticks and joins me on the floor. He turns towards me and I do the same, both of staring at each other with our respective cartons of food.
"Chinese food is ten times better when you're sitting on the floor with a pair of chopsticks. Trust me."
I take the pair he's offering, and open them and the carton and take my first bite.
Even though I doubt the food is actually any better than it would be if we were sitting at the kitchen table with proper utensils and bowls, Sebastian saw me struggle and he made me feel at ease. He didn't have to comment on it, or as questions. He simply saw I was struggling and brought my mind to something else.
"What's your favorite color?" he asks, a mouthful of sesame chicken but without a single care.
"Purple. No, red. I think."
"Hmm. I can see the red. Your hair. The panties."
My cheeks flush and his grin widens.
"I love that." He nods towards me. "When I say shit, and you're modest or embarrassed, your cheeks flush the best shade of red I've ever seen." He takes another bite, and I do the same. "Makes me wonder what else flushes when you're on fire, Pres."
This man's mouth will be the death of me. I say that as a permanent flush takes over my body, much to his amusement.
"Is this twenty questions, because I think it's my turn."
"Shoot, babe. I'm an open book."
"Favorite cereal?"
His brow furrows as he thinks. Seconds pass in silence and then he finally speaks, "Damn. Hitting me with the hardest stuff off the top, huh?"
I giggle. Noticing that Sebastian's carton of food is nearly gone and I have a full one, I realize that I'm failing at using these chopsticks even worse than what I thought I would. Shit, I curse inwardly as another piece of broccoli falls back into the container.
"Captain Crunch. Hands down. I mean, not that I eat much cereal since I have to keep my figure up, but if I ever do eat cereal, that's it."
I can't help but roll my eyes. His body is all hard planes and sharp lines and it looks completely natural like he didn't have to work at all for it.
"I see that look on your face, baby. Trust me
, I spend hours every week in the gym on this body. It doesn't just come naturally. Coach will kick my ass up and down the ice if my body isn't in the best possible condition it can be."
He takes the carton from me and scoops up a piece of broccoli, easily, and reaches out towards me to put it in my mouth.
"Really?" I say laughing, but my stomach grumbles before he can even respond. "Fine."
I take a bite of the broccoli, almost moaning when it hits my tongue. I was starving and this food is amazing.
"Need you to stop that shit, Pres." Sebastian is the one to groan, rearranging himself in his jeans, his face crumpled in mock hurt.
"What do you want to be? When you're older?" I ask.
The look on his face changes to something darker, obviously a subject that he didn't want to talk about.
"I dunno. I know what I'm supposed to be but…" He trails off, tearing his gaze from mine.
The hesitation in his words has me scooting closer until we're both cross legged on the floor of my living room, knee to knee, eating food out of a carton.
"Hey, we don't have to talk about it. I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize. It's just a subject I hate fucking talking about. My father's an asshole. He has these expectations of me, simply because I'm a Pierce. He wants me to take over the family business but I don't know. I don't know what I want, I just know that I don't wanna follow in his footsteps. He's a dick."
I nod, staying silent.
"I wanna play hockey. Be a teacher. Be a fucking doctor. Anything but what he wants me to be."
He sounds bitter, hurt, angry and I reach out to place my hand on his, rubbing my thumb comfortingly against his skin.
"Have you told him that?"
He scoffs, "Yeah, right. You can't tell him shit. He's not used to anyone saying shit to him. I don't know Pres. Shit's just fucked up right now."
"I understand, I don't have much advice to offer on it, but I do know you should never let anyone control your future. It's yours. The one thing in life that you have complete and total control of are your choices and which direction you want the future to go in. I know firsthand…"
"Let's not talk about this heavy shit. I wanna get to know you more than the hot English teacher who wears fuck me heels and is a secret cat lady."
He grins, but it doesn't meet his eyes. I know that the heavy stuff is the stuff that holds him down, and I understand it more than he could imagine.
"We should talk about ‘us’… where this is going. It seems so easy, so natural to be with you, Sebastian, but this can't end in any way we would expect."
"Who says? You try and condemn us before we've even begun, Pres. Fuck what everyone thinks. We did talk about this, I thought we decided to do what we wanted and say fuck everyone else."
I set the carton down in-between us, and drag my hands down my face. "When I opened the door, I forgot who we are. Forgot our secret. It was a simple moment of carelessness that could have cost us everything. You see that right? That one moment, one mistake and it's all over. The world will come crashing down around us and there isn't a thing either of us can do to stop it."
Clenching his jaw, he looks off to the other side of the living room, avoiding my gaze. "I'm graduating in six months, and I won't be a student. We just have to be careful for six months, Presley, that's it. And then we can be free. I'm eighteen, and I'm pretty sure I've shown you how much of a fucking man I am."
"That's not what I'm saying. I'm just scared, Sebastian. What will I do if I lose my job?
"You're not going to lose your job, Presley. We just have to be careful. Watch our backs. Make sure not to interact more than normal in public. No one will know, and unless we get careless, then our secret will stay ours."
He reaches for me, pulling me onto his lap and wrapping his arms tightly around my body. It feels natural to be his, wrapped up in him, lost in a world that belongs to him. Even though being with him is the biggest risk I’ve ever taken, and it’s terrifying, I still feel safer than I have in longer than I can remember.
"Okay."
His lips find mine in a soul shattering kiss that drives any and all doubt from my mind. His tongue glides along mine, causing heat to unfurl down to my toes.
When we break apart, we’re each panting, our eyes locked in an intense stare that I feel everywhere.
I clear my throat and try to bring the conversation back before we skate into new territory.
"So, I was thinking maybe next weekend I was going to start painting. The hardware store called and said my paint is ready, and I was wondering if maybe you wanted to volunteer all of your muscles?"
"Say less." He smirks.
"Oh, I've got a good one. Favorite movie?"
"Anything with Jason Statham. That dude is a complete bad ass."
"Bald guy?" I ask, trying to remember who he's talking about.
"Yeah, there was this one scene in a movie where he shoved the guys gun up his as—"
I hold my hand up stopping him, "Do not finish that sentence, Sebastian Pierce. Gross. I am not an action kinda girl. I like chick flicks."
He feigns mock surprise with a dramatic gasp, "I never would've known. Not a true romantic like you, yeah?" I give him a quick, chaste kiss on the lips, shutting him right up.
"Tell me how you lasted so long not being able to use chopsticks."
"I lived a very different life."
The uneasiness settles between us once more at the mention of the life I've been trying to hide.
"I want to know all of you, Presley Ambrose. Start to finish, beginning to end."
I don't answer him immediately, letting his words simmer inside of me instead.
Sometimes the past is too broken to bring back. It's ugly, marred, filled with evil that knows no bounds. I don't want to relive the person I used to be, the life I used to live. I want to move forward and let it stop dragging me down to hell.
17
Sebastian
It's only been twenty-four hours since I had the taste of Presley's lips, and I've spent more time than I care to admit talking myself out of showing up at her house like a fucking stalker.
Something about her drives me out of my mind. I can’t stop thinking about her, obsessing over the flush that constantly finds its way to her cheeks while I am around. And even though I am obsessively thinking of her, much like always at this point, I need to be here right now. Home with my boys.
Ezra is finally here. Finally, back where he belongs, and it had been an intense ass emotional night for us all. We are adjusting to having him back, and he is trying to acclimate to being outside of a prison cell. I know it won’t be an easy road, but whatever it takes, whatever happens, it is worth it to have him home.
"Yo, dip shit." Something hard hits me directly in the side of the head.
Ouch.
I whip my head to the side where the unidentified object came from, to see Ezra grinning. like a Cheshire fucking cat. My best friend since the fifth grade. While there has always been something turbulent about him, he came back from prison different. Irrational, quick to jump, a caged animal, only more rabid, foaming at the mouth for revenge that none of us truly understood. For the first time in our lives, he was hiding something, keeping the truth close to him and we don’t know why.
Even through all of that, I was happy as fuck to have him home with us even if it was less of him and more of someone I didn't recognize. That's why his brothers, us, we’re here to bring him back and slaughter whoever was dragging him down.
Growing up, I didn't have a family in the classical sense. Sure, I had a mother and a father, but they were people I barely knew. Strangers who sometimes slept up the hall and held my hand when they thought others were looking. My mom was too busy playing trophy wife to a man who cared more about his money and his business than being a husband or father. Looking back, I see how goddamn sad my childhood was. Raised by nannies and the housekeeper, I was lonely. I was desperate to capture their attention in any way th
at I could.
Then, in fifth grade I met Rhys, Alec, and Ezra. Each of us is more different than heaven and hell, but somehow, we formed a brotherhood that was unbreakable. We found in each other, what we were lacking with our own broken families.
"You're a dick."
His head falls back as a manic laugh leaves his lips. "Eh, it's big though." He shrugs.
"I know it makes me sound like a pussy, but I'm glad you're back. We were all losing our fucking minds E."
His demeanor changes, like ice water on a heated stove top, it sizzles out around him.
"Did what I had to do, Bash. I couldn't live with myself if one of you went to prison over my fucked up shit."
"Fuck that. We knew what the fuck was happening Ezra, don't act like none of us would've taken a bullet for you. You bleed, I bleed."
He nods solemnly.
"Alec hacked my dad's computer, and he found something. He's on his way." His eyes drag up to meet mine. They're void, lifeless. Whatever the fuck has happened is sucking the soul out of my best friend and it isn't the blonde chick with all of the piercings he has a thing for.
"E, whatever it is, you know we got you. We'll stand by your side till the end. You know that, right?"
He hums an answer, but stays silent.
"You know what? Let's go out. Go to the Abbey, ride down to the Ravine, drink until we puke. Like old times."
"Fuck, that does sound good. Break into the Y and use their indoor pool." He grins, knowing that it immediately reminds me of the last time we did that.
"Dude, not only did we get caught, we got caught with Alec's pants around his fucking ankles. It was so fucking cold I'm pretty sure his balls were in his throat. I swear to God I thought he was going to cry."
This is what I missed with Ez. A lifetime of memories that are some of the greatest, happiest moments of my life. They all involve my brothers. Everything we've done, we've done together. Until now. Ezra did prison alone.
"Real shit, I'm pretty sure that's the time my dad beat the shit out of me so bad I was pissing blood for a week."
I shake my head, hating that so many of our stories involve the abuse of his father.