Love You Now (Book Two: Love Hurts Duet)

by M. Robinson

“Harley, you are in so many ways, and don’t for one second think you’re not.”

  I took a deep breath, ready for anythin’ he was about to throw in my direction, but my phone rang.

  “It’s Shiloh,” he addressed, handin’ me my phone off the coffee table.

  I hit silent. “I’ll call her back.”

  Moments later it rang again.

  “Answer it. Might be important.”

  I did.

  “Hel—”

  “Where are you?” she questioned, her voice laced with panic.

  I shot straight up. “What’s wrong?”

  “Come home. Alone. Now!”

  “Shi—”

  She hung up.

  “You better go, babe.”

  I nodded. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Promise?”

  “Yes.”

  “I hate havin’ to leave you. If it were anyone but Shiloh you know I wouldn’t leave, right?”

  “I do.” He pulled the hair away from my face. “Are you okay?”

  I nodded again, frazzled with what was going on with my cousin.

  “Call me when you know what’s up, yeah?”

  “I will.”

  We kissed goodbye, I leashed up Teddy, and out the door I went.

  With my heart in my throat...

  Every minute of the way.

  Chapter 21

  <>Harley<>

  “Shiloh?! Where are you?!” I rushed through the door of our dorm, shoutin’.

  Nothin’.

  “Shiloh?!

  Still nothin’.

  Haulin’ ass across the small livin’ space that split up our bedrooms, I ran into her room with Teddy behind me. Haltin’ my steps when she came into view.

  I cocked my head to the side, speakin’ with conviction, “Shiloh, why are you carryin’ a metal bat, lookin’ like you’re about to fuck some shit up?” It was then I took in her appearance.

  Her chest was risin’ and fallin’.

  Her eyes were bloodshot red as if she’d been bawlin’ her eyes out. Hair stickin’ up in all directions like she’d been tryin’ to rip it out. Her clothes all disarray.

  With a hand tremblin’, tightly grippin’ her weapon.

  “What’s goin’ on?” I asked, terrified she’d been physically hurt by someone.

  Judgin’ by her appearance bein’ the way it was, and the bat she was holdin’ on to for dear life, it made me think, damn, she was attacked on campus and was in shock mode or somethin’. Although, Trigger would’ve been here with her if that had happened to his Shy.

  He loved her so much.

  “Shiloh, please talk to me? You’re freakin’ me the fuck out. Did someone hurt you?”

  She stumbled over her words, noddin’ profusely.

  My heart sank to the floor, maybe I was right...

  “What happened? Were you attacked?”

  She burst into tears again, barely able to hold herself upright.

  “Here, come on. Let’s sit down.” I guided her to sit on the edge of her bed. Her body shakin’ uncontrollably in my grasp while I did.

  For the life of her, she wouldn’t let go of the bat when I tried removin’ it from her hands. It got to the point I gave up tryin’, lettin’ her have the comfort it was obviously provin’. Which scared me even more in the process.

  I couldn’t stop thinkin’ the worst.

  “You gotta tell me what happened, Shiloh. I can’t help you, if you don’t tell me.”

  There was no gettin’ through to her. Nothin’ I said was makin’ her snap out of whatever hell she was goin’ through. Bein’ held captive in her own mind.

  “Do I need to call an ambulance?”

  She didn’t answer, starin’ off in the dark space of her room. Only capable of bawlin’ her eyes out.

  Inhalin’ a deep and uneasy breath, I reached for my phone. Pullin’ it out of my back pocket to dial up the only person I knew who could get through to her.

  “I’m callin’ Trigger.” I hit send and before it even rang, she irrationally tore my phone out of my grasp. Chuckin’ it full force at the wall in the corner of her room.

  “Shiloh!” I exclaimed, caught off guard she’d just thrown my phone.

  I watched as it flew through the air, crashin’ into the wall at full force. Causin’ a loud commotion to erupt with glass pieces shatterin’ in all directions. Shatterin’ further when it skidded across the tile floor.

  “What the hell, Shiloh!”

  There was nothin’ left of my phone which wasn’t what shocked me the most. It was the evidence of her phone in the exact spot where mine was now layin’ broken. In the same condition. Evident that she must have flung her phone against the wall as well.

  “Oh fuck,” I rasped, never expectin’ to see that.

  Shiloh was pantin’, powerless for her next breath.

  Her lungs wheezin’, helpless against the turmoil eatin’ her alive.

  I grabbed onto her shoulders to peer deep into her eyes. “Shiloh, look at me. I need you to look at me right now.”

  Her sunken, lifeless gaze finally connected with mine, and I didn’t waver. Afraid I’d lose her again.

  “I was just tryin’ to call Trigger. He’s your lobster, the love of your life. You’re everythin’, remember? He would never hurt you. You know that, Shiloh. I can’t get through to you, so you need him right now. He will help you, I promise. Stay here, I’m gonna go in the livin’ room and call him from our hou—”

  “I WAS A FUCKING BET!”

  I jerked back, confused. “What?”

  With everythin’ inside of her, she revealed, “I was a fucking bet, Harley! I was a fucking bet to him.”

  “What? To who?”

  “Who do you think?! Trigger!”

  I shook my head. “No way, I’ve seen him with you. That boy is head over heels in love with you, Shiloh. Are you sure?”

  She fervently nodded, grabbin’ the other bat from the side of her bed. Handin’ it off to me.

  “So are you in or are you out?”

  “Uh ... for what exactly?”

  “Harley, are you in? Or are you out?”

  I didn’t know what I was in for, but from the sudden beady look in her eyes and the harsh expression on her face, I knew whatever it was...

  Wasn’t good.

  “Shiloh, how about you put the bats down—”

  “Harley, are you in? Or are you out?” she repeated sternly.

  “Babe, you’re not in the right state of mind to be makin’ any decisions. Ya feel me?”

  “Fine, I’ll go by myself.” She abruptly stood up. “I can do it alone.”

  “Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!” I blocked her with my arms out in front of me. “Do what by yourself, Shiloh? You’re not makin’ any sense. I can’t keep up.”

  “So then you’re in.” She handed me the bat. “Let’s go.”

  I had absolutely no idea what she meant, not a fuckin’ clue. There was no choice in the matter. I had to go with her. Hopin’ like hell we wouldn’t end up in jail for murder.

  She didn’t say a word on the drive to wherever we were goin’. Lost in her own thoughts with her foot heavy on the gas pedal.

  Drivin’ faster and faster.

  Once we pulled into the lot where Trigger’s fraternity parked their cars, it all came to a head for me. Knowin’ exactly what she was about to do.

  “Shiloh,” I coaxed as she slammed on the brakes, parkin’ her SUV a few feet away from his truck. “I think you’re havin’ some sort of mental breakdown, let’s turn around. I’ll come back with you tomorrow if this is still what you wanna do. For tonight, let’s go back home, and we can figure shit out. Together.”

  She opened the door.

  “You have no idea what I went through this evening. What he put me through, Harley.”

  “I know. Please, let’s go home so you can tell me all about it. Then tomorrow we can fuck shit up. Okay?”

  Quickly, she stepped o
ut, but I grabbed her arm. “Babe, you’re gonna be a lawyer. You, more than anyone, know what happens when you destroy private property.”

  “I don’t give a flying fuck!”

  Hearin’ the cuss words spew from her mouth only concerned me further. Shiloh never cussed unless she’d reached her limit.

  “I don’t think this is a good idea.”

  “You know what wasn’t a good idea?” She nodded, her jaw clenchin’. “Me giving that piece of shit redneck a chance! I have no one to blame but myself! I knew better, Harley! I fuckin’ knew better! I fell for his act, his goddamn stupid charm! I let him get to me! For nothing! If he thinks he can hurt me, embarrass me, he’s about to meet another side of me he didn’t know existed!”

  “Shi—”

  Roughly pullin’ her arm out of my grip, she didn’t wait another second.

  “Oh God...”

  With one determined foot in front of the other, I watched my levelheaded cousin make her way over to the bastard’s truck. Hittin’ somethin’ on what I assumed was Trigger’s key fob.

  She didn’t think twice about it, liftin’ the metal bat over her head and swingin’ it as hard as she could. Smashin’ both the headlights into hundreds of pieces. Hurlin’ shards of glass everywhere and all around her.

  “Oh fuck!” I jumped out of her SUV just as she pulled a pocket knife from her jeans.

  Usin’ all the anger, strength, and hurt left inside of her, she dove the knife into the tire. Penetratin’ the rubber full force.

  “That’s for fucking me over!”

  Instantly strugglin’ to pull the knife back out of the tough exterior.

  “Give it back, motherfucker!” Swearin’ up a storm, she stumbled back almost fallin’ on her ass.

  “Goddamn it!” she fumed, catchin’ her footin’. Gettin’ up and doin’ the next.

  Face beet red.

  Tears fallin’.

  Gruntin’.

  Screamin’ at the top of her lungs, “I HATE YOU!” as she performed her revenge.

  Thank God I didn’t have to worry about somebody callin’ the cops. The frat house was a few blocks away, so the boys had a golf cart that drove them back and forth. There was nothin’ near this parkin’ lot.

  Though I still yelled out, “Shiloh! That’s enough!” Dartin’ over to her.

  “The fuck it is!”

  She slammed the bat into his side mirror, leavin’ it hangin’ by a thin electrical cord before she went fuckin’ crazy. Hittin’ the bat full force along the sides of his truck, bangin’ up the metal to the point it looked like it’d been in a car accident.

  “Fuck you, asshole! After everythin’ I did for you! I let down my guard for you! I gave you my heart! My soul! My fuckin’ virginity!”

  “Oh no...” I didn’t know that. This must have just happened.

  Shiloh was savin’ that for the man she was gonna marry.

  “Do you have any idea how much I loved you?! How much I thought you loved me?!”

  One hit.

  Two hits.

  Three hits.

  Four.

  I started cryin’ with her.

  “Shiloh, I’m so sorr—”

  “How could you do this to me?! I fucking hate you! Do you hear me?! I. HATE. YOU!”

  “Shiloh, please...” I begged for my best friend to stop hurtin’.

  She didn’t stop there.

  Liftin’ the bat as high as she could again, she shattered every last window. Thick glass flew every which way, comin’ down from the sky like rain. Tingin’ off the mangled steel, crunchin’ beneath her boots as she stomped around from window to window. She left his windshield for last, hittin’ the fuck out of it until nothin’ but spider cracks were left in her path of destruction.

  It was as if she was possessed. There was no gettin’ through to her in her current state of mind. This wasn’t my cousin or my best friend. This was a woman actin’ out of pure rage and heartbreak.

  Just when I thought she was done and the chaos was over, she proved me wrong. She flung open the back door and sat up on her knees on the back seat.

  “Shiloh, don’t!”

  She didn’t listen, not that I expected her to.

  Rammin’ the knife into the leather seats, draggin' and rippin' the tough fabric down to spell out the name he always called her.

  Shy.

  In big, huge letters.

  So much for him not knowin’ who did this...

  “Stupid fucking name! My name is Shiloh! Not Shy, you fucking liar!’

  In one swift motion, she ripped the necklace he gave her from her neck and left it hangin’ off the rearview mirror.

  Dangling for him to see and know exactly who was responsible for the death of his truck.

  I swallowed hard as she jumped out, stumblin’ back and almost losin’ her footin’ again.

  Exhausted.

  Barely able to catch her breath.

  Her fists tightenin’ at her sides still grippin’ the evidence, inspectin’ her handy work.

  “I hope you feel half the pain you put me through tonight. Your precious truck, Delilah, paid the price.”

  “Shi—”

  She screamed, heavy and loud with every ounce of breath she had left in her lungs.

  Her chest heavin’.

  Her lips partin’, desperately tryin’ to catch her breathin’.

  Her heart...

  Broken.

  Shattered like the windows of his truck.

  The irony was not lost on me.

  Chapter 22

  <>Harley<>

  “Shiloh...” I wrapped my arm around her. “You just pulled a Carrie Underwood.”

  The metal bat fell out of her hand, makin’ a harsh sound against the concrete pavement. It was only then she burst into fresh new tears, collapsin’ to the ground exactly how her world came crashin’ down.

  I pulled her into my arms, holdin’ her as tight as I could.

  “I’m so sorry, Shiloh. I’m so sorry, babe.”

  “It hurts so bad...”

  “I know, babe, I know.”

  “I feel like I’m dyin’, Harley. I feel like I’m fuckin’ dyin’.”

  “I know.”

  “I can’t breathe. It hurts to breathe.”

  “It’s okay. I’ll breathe for you.”

  “I thought he loved me ... he said he loved me all the time... How could he do this to me?”

  “I don’t know,” I cried right along with. “I wish I knew.”

  “How could I be so stupid?”

  “You’re not stupid. You just fell in love with the wrong boy.”

  “He took everything from me. My first kiss ... my first everythin’. He was the first boy I ever touched. Ever touched me... I gave him all of it ... for what? I was a bet ... nothing but a bet, Harley...”

  My heart was breakin’.

  Achin’.

  Hurtin’ in a way I never experienced before.

  I hated this was happenin’ to her. She didn’t deserve it. Not one bit.

  “I slept with him tonight for the first time.”

  I held her stronger, firmer, tryin’ to mold us into one person. Her words hittin’ my body like a fuckin’ train wreck.

  “I thought I was gonna marry him ... he told me he wanted to have babies with me ... that I was gonna be the mother of his children ... that he wanted to make me his wife...”

  An uncontrollable surge of fresh tears erupted from my eyes, feelin’ those words in the soul of my bein’.

  “After we were done,” she hyperventilated, gaspin’, breathless. “I didn’t even get a chance to enjoy it because the football team barged into his room at the frat house.” She pulled away, lookin’ deep into my eyes. “They told me. They were high-fiving him, telling him he finally won the bet they started in high school. It’s been going on since day one. Since the first time I kissed him. It was all a lie. Everything has been one big lie. I trusted him ... handed him my heart... Do you have any idea how ma
ny times I told him not to hurt me?”

  Her skin was burning, as if it was on fire, searin’ from the inside out.

  “Do you know what he said every time? I’d die before I’d ever hurt you, Shy...”

  She came undone, fallin’ apart. Crumblin’ to pieces in my arms. Suckin’ in air that wasn’t available for the takin’, layin’ her forehead on my chest.

  It was all too much.

  To live this with her. Nothin’ would be the same after this.

  Not. One. Damn. Thing.

  The pain...

  The hurt...

  The loss...

  The sensation of her heart breakin’ over and over again.

  All at the hands of a boy she loved.

  “I thought he was my lobster... I thought ... he was my everything. Turns out, I was nothing but a bet. A fucking bet to him, Harley.”

  She bawled so damn hard. I’d never seen her, or anyone cry like she was in my entire life.

  I hugged her so tightly, tryin’ to hold what was left of her together. Comfortin’ her the only way I knew how. It was almost too much to bear.

  I felt so fuckin’ helpless.

  Her beautiful face was filled with so much hopelessness, so much despair, evokin’ a physical reaction from me. The throbbin’ that I felt in my heart was beyond cripplin’.

  I was at a loss, hatin’ Trigger with every bone in my body.

  How could he do this to her?

  Pullin’ her hair away from her face, she finally looked up at me with a huge, hollow vacancy in her gaze. The expression chippin’ away at my heart a little more. There was nothin’ left of the strong girl I had known all my life. I didn’t recognize the person sittin’ before me.

  There was so much I wanted to say, so much I wanted to do. Though I could do nothin’. She was hurtin’ in a way I never knew was possible. It cut deep within my core. I’d kill to see her smile, knowin’ in the end it wouldn’t matter.

  The warm light of her innocence was gone, bleedin’ all over me, and I didn’t know how to get it back.

  Watchin’ someone I loved...

  My best friend.

  My cousin.

  My family.

  It drained everythin’ out of me. My own body felt unfamiliar with all the sensations she was stirrin’ up within me.

  “Shiloh,” I whispered, my voice hoarse. “I don’t think that’s it. There has to be more to it. He loves you. I know he loves you. I’ve even heard Jackson say how much Trigger loves you.”