by Ruth Langan
Jace opened the door, retrieving several empty boxes. “I found these in the shed. We can put the perishable food in them. There’s a shelf high enough to keep them out of the reach of most animals.”
She started removing some food from the refrigerator. “Except the bears.”
He joined her and gave a quick smile. “Ah, those bears. Clever beasts.”
Now why did her heart have to do that sudden free fall whenever he got too near? She gathered up the carton of milk and turned, bumping into his chest. Her fingers fumbled and she dropped it. It was only Jace’s quick reflexes that kept it from hitting the floor. And all the while, he kept his gaze locked on hers.
“All this talk about bears is going to give me nightmares tonight.” She knew she was babbling, but she needed to say something to cover her awkwardness.
“Do you get them often?” He packed the carton in the box and waited while she rummaged about, locating cheese and eggs.
She nodded, sobering suddenly. “Often enough to miss a lot of sleep.”
“You’re not alone.”
“You too?” She looked up. The laughter was gone from his eyes. In its place was a bleakness that startled her. Her gaze was drawn to the scar on his cheek, and she found herself wondering if that had anything to do with his bad dreams.
She turned away and scanned the contents of the refrigerator one last time. “I guess that’s everything.” She opened the freezer. “What about all this?”
He nodded, relieved that she’d changed the subject. “We’ll have to store that in the shed, too. If it starts to thaw, we’ll just have to cook everything and have ourselves a feast.”
She lifted out neatly labeled packages and stacked them in the box. When she was finished, Jace set aside two packages.
“I hope you’re not a vegetarian,” he said.
“No. Why?” She eyed the packages suspiciously. “What’s that?”
“Tonight’s dinner.” He winked, and Ciara’s heart did another flip. “My sister, Mary Ellen, always did have a good eye for prime beef.”
He hefted the boxes and carried them to the shed where he stored them on a high shelf, placing several heavy boards over the top to keep any curious animals away.
Then he began tinkering with the generator. As he worked he found himself thinking about Ciara. She might have teased about packing a bikini, but the truth was, the clothes she’d brought were hardly the Hollywood type. She looked as natural in jeans and a flannel shirt as she did in those sexy, glittery gowns she usually shed in her movies. She seemed different too, from the brainless characters she portrayed. There was a sense of humor beneath the sultry looks. And a sensitivity he hadn’t anticipated. Despite her earlier attacks on his chosen profession, she’d instantly backed off when she’d caught a glimpse of his pain.
He turned away, rubbing his cheek. He was reading too much into all this. And spending entirely too much time and energy thinking about Ciara Wilde. She wasn’t the problem at the moment. Survival was.
As he stepped from the shed he glanced skyward. The snow had stopped, at least for the moment, and the sun was actually trying to break through the clouds. But if the storm clouds to the north were any indication, there could be more snow on the way. He was determined to keep a supply of firewood beside the fireplace at all times. That way, no matter how much snow fell, they’d be warm.
A short time later he strolled back inside, scraping snow off his boots as he did. Leaning against the door he watched as Ciara poked at the fire before adding another log. The thin fabric of her T-shirt strained against her breasts, and he felt a rush of heat that had nothing at all to do with the warmth in the cabin.
“You’re getting pretty good at that.”
She looked up, drew her flannel shirt tighter before closing the firescreen. “Yeah. In no time I’ll be baking bread and spinning wool into cloth.”
“Now those were the good old days.” He studied the way her jeans molded to her hips, and decided that he definitely needed to cool off. “The snow’s ended. I think I’ll take a walk. Want to come?”
She shook her head. “I’d love to. But the warmest thing I packed was a denim jacket.”
He pointed to a door off the kitchen. “There are parkas and boots in that storage closet.”
She brightened. “I’ll just be a minute.”
She emerged wearing an oversize parka, the cuffs of her jeans tucked into hiking boots. “Okay. I think I’m ready to brave the elements. Except that I couldn’t find any gloves.”
They stepped outside and followed the line of trees. Beyond the cabin the grade rose sharply, and they found themselves climbing until they emerged on an open hillside. It was a struggle to walk through all that snow, but the view was worth it. Sunlight glistened on a dazzling, pristine wilderness.
Ciara stopped in her tracks. “Oh, just look at it.”
Jace paused beside her, then looked down. Their cabin far below looked like a toy nestled so snugly in the woods; all that could be seen was the smoke coming from the chimney. All around them was snow—so white it was nearly blinding. Distant fences were nearly buried beneath the drifts. It lay heavy on tree branches, dragging limbs nearly to the ground. A branch somewhere snapped beneath the weight, and the sound echoed in the silence like a gunshot.
“You’d almost think—” her voice was hushed, reverent “—we were the only ones to see this.”
“We are. Except for them.” He pointed and she followed his gesture, then gave a gasp of pleasure at the sight of the herd of deer just emerging from a stand of trees.
She and Jace stood perfectly still, enjoying the image of the graceful animals picking their way through the drifts. Suddenly, one of the deer caught the scent of humans, and the herd bounded away, disappearing into the woods as quickly as they had come.
For the space of a heartbeat Ciara couldn’t find her voice. When she did, she managed to whisper, “Wasn’t that wonderful?”
“Yeah. Pretty neat.” He glanced over and caught the glimmer of tears on her lashes before she managed to blink them away. “Haven’t you ever seen deer in the wild before?”
“Not since I was a kid. I never expected to be so moved by the sight. But they’re really special, aren’t they?”
He nodded. “Come on, Hollywood. Let’s lighten the mood. I’ll race you to the top of the hill. Last one there cooks dinner tonight.”
It would have been an easy run without the mounds of snow. But now it was like running with both feet tied together and heavy weights in their boots. After only a couple of steps, Ciara felt herself falling. As she went down, she managed to snag Jace’s arm, dragging him with her.
“Hey. No fair.” He fell into a snowbank, and she landed beside him.
“You didn’t spell out any rules.” She scrambled to her feet and broke into a run. “You just said last one there cooks dinner.”
“Oh, I get it.” He started after her. “You want to play cutthroat, do you?” When she eluded his grasp, he made a dive, tackling her around the middle. She fell, and he landed on top of her.
A mistake, he realized. He was suddenly all too aware of the soft curves beneath him, and the way his body sank into them. He was playing with fire here.
Unaware of his reaction, she gave a laugh as she struggled free of his grasp and started to crawl away. But he was too fast for her, catching her foot and dragging her back down. When he rolled her over, she had a face full of snow.
“Oh, you’re going to pay for that, Lockhart.” She scooped up a handful of snow.
Reading her intentions, he ducked his head, and she smeared it in his hair instead. “Bad aim, Hollywood.” He bent his head and shook it like a great, shaggy dog, sending a snow shower over her face.
She scooped up another handful and managed to stuff it down the neck of his parka. At his surprised look, she gave a roar of laughter. “Looks like my aim just got better.”
“I’ll have to do something about that.” He caught both her hands
in his and locked them over her head. Then, with a wicked smile, he picked up a handful of snow. As he brought it slowly to her neck he taunted, “Now what’re you going to do about it?”
“Jace.” She was laughing harder as he began to unzip her parka. “Don’t you dare!”
“Dare? Did I hear you say ‘dare’? Are you daring me, Hollywood? I think I’d better warn you—from the time I was a little kid, I never could turn away from a dare.”
“Jace.” She saw the glint in his eye, and started wiggling.
Without warning, he dropped the snow and cupped her face in his hand.
The look he gave her was hot and fierce, as though he was fighting a war within himself. There was strength in him, she realized. And an undercurrent of violence—or perhaps passion. Whatever it was, it frightened her.
And then his mouth was on hers. There was nothing soft or gentle or persuasive about the kiss. It was as hot, as hungry as the look in his eyes. And as demanding.
Jace didn’t even know how this had happened. One minute, it was all good-natured teasing. The next, he’d wanted more than anything in the world to taste those pouting lips.
And, oh, the taste of her. At the same time sweet and savory, icy cold and hot as sin. And even now, knowing he ought to back off, he couldn’t seem to find the willpower. Instead, he savored the flavor of her and took the kiss deeper. His hand fisted in hair that was even softer than it looked. All silken strands that tangled around his fingers and brushed against his palm, inviting him to take more.
He hadn’t expected this softness. It was a surprise. She was a surprise. Sweet when he’d expected her to be tough. Vulnerable when he’d anticipated an icy wall of reserve. Everything about her was different from what he’d anticipated.
Ciara’s head was spinning. She knew she ought to resist. But there had been no warning. And now, with her senses reeling, she couldn’t seem to do more than sigh as she lost herself in the pleasure of his kiss.
There had been so many fake kisses in so many movie scenes, she’d lost count. But this was no act. This was so real, so soul-stirring that she felt her breath back up in her throat. Felt her heart pounding in her chest. Felt herself melting into the snow.
This was a man who knew how to kiss, moving his mouth over hers with a thoroughness that had her sighing. He kissed her as though he were tasting the sweetest of confections. Drinking her in. Feasting on her. Against her will, she lost herself in the kiss, forgetting all her promises to herself to hold this man at bay.
And then, just as her lips softened and opened to him, he abruptly jerked away. She blinked. When her blurred vision cleared, he was already getting to his feet.
Bad move, he decided, as he reached down and helped her to stand. They might be stuck here for days. He’d better keep his hands to himself. The last thing he needed in his life was one more complication. And a woman like this would definitely prove to be a complication.
“Time to get back to the cabin. My hands are freezing.” His tone was as flat and unemotional as he could manage over his wildly beating heart. It irritated him to note that his hands were shaking. He stuck them in his pockets and started off at a brisk pace.
“Yeah.” Ciara brushed snow from her backside, then struggled to keep up with his impatient strides. If he was going to pretend nothing had happened, she’d play along. In fact, it would be a lot better this way. They’d both pretend this had been nothing more than a moment of weakness, that it had already been forgotten.
“But just so you know, I got closer to the top than you did. So you can make dinner.”
Three
Ciara stared around with a look of wonder as they made their way down the hill. “I can’t believe this much snow fell in just one day.”
“Yeah. These spring storms can be deadly. They’re almost worse than in the wintertime. At least then you know what to expect.” He shot her a knowing grin. “This time of year you could get caught in your bikini. That was a bikini you were wearing last night, wasn’t it?”
“A thong. And you’re not going to let me forget it, are you?”
“Why should I? It’s not something I’m liable to forget.”
He was rewarded by a glimpse of Ciara blushing. Not something he’d ever expected to see, especially since she had been so defiant last night. But then, she’d been fighting nerves. Maybe she’d merely tried to cover them with an act of bravado.
“Watch out for these drifts.” Jace picked his way through the mounds of snow, breaking a trail for Ciara to follow. In places the snow was so deep that it reached nearly to their waists. Hidden beneath were rocks and stumps and fallen trees just waiting to trip them.
Jace turned to offer his hand, and saw Ciara standing perfectly still, her head lifted, one hand shielding her eyes from the sun.
He followed the direction of her gaze and caught sight of a hawk lazily riding air currents overhead. “Majestic, isn’t he?”
She nodded. “He’s a beauty. I’ve always been fascinated by hawks. Occasionally when I’m driving, I’ll spot one perched on a light post high above the freeway. I always find myself wondering why it doesn’t fly off to the wilderness.”
“Maybe there’s a girlfriend on a nearby light post. After all, there has to be something keeping him in town.”
“Maybe so. But why don’t they both fly away? It just seems so much more natural to see one here in the mountains than to see one trying to adapt to life in a crowded, bustling city.”
“They’re like all creatures.” His tone deepened. “Adapt or die.”
Ciara nodded. “I guess that’s true. We all have to adapt. But look how much we sacrifice for our urban sprawl. Noise and traffic and people in our faces. It just seems a pity that we pay such a high price for civilization.”
“Don’t be so quick to knock it. I’ve seen the other side. Primitive life isn’t all that pure and noble.” Jace’s voice hardened. “There’s just as much violence in nature, and in small, developing nations, as there is in any big, cold, impersonal city.”
Ciara was surprised by the passion in his voice. He was such a contrast in moods. For the most part funny and irreverent. But maybe he used that offbeat humor to mask much deeper feelings. She found herself wondering once more just what he’d seen, and where he’d seen it. Whatever it was, wherever it was, she felt certain it had been filled with violence and tragedy.
Before she could form a question, a frightened rabbit suddenly dashed across the snow. In a blur of motion the hawk went into a dive and sank its talons deep. The rabbit shrieked in pain, then went eerily silent as the hawk lifted into the air. Within minutes it had flown out of sight with its prey, leaving nothing but drops of blood in the snow to mark its passing.
Caught up in the drama, Ciara could do nothing more than stare into the distance. In the blink of an eye, everything had changed. The pastoral scene had turned into one of frightening violence.
Finally finding her voice, she turned. “How could you possibly know that would happen?”
“I didn’t. At least I didn’t expect to see it happen right here in front of us. But it was a pretty good bet that our hawk was searching for lunch.” Seeing that she was shaken by the incident, he took her hand. It was cold as ice. And the mere touch of her hand in his packed a punch that had him sucking in a breath.
“Come on. We need to get inside where it’s warm.” He led her over a series of buried boulders.
As they neared the cabin she turned to him. “This morning you mentioned Bosnia. You’ve been there?”
He nodded. “Bosnia, Kosovo, and half a dozen other towns all over eastern Europe.”
“Then you’ve seen firsthand all the things that the rest of us only saw on the nightly news.”
“I’ve seen enough.” He opened the cabin door and stood aside to let her lead the way inside. “More than enough.”
As she stomped snow from her boots she glanced over, and noticed that the bleak look had returned to his eyes. And the frown lin
e was there between his brows.
In an effort to lift his spirits she said, “If you’ll bring the milk from the shed, I’ll make hot chocolate.”
“It’s a deal.” He turned away, eager to escape.
Jace took his time trudging through the snow to the shed. The violent scene with the hawk had triggered an explosion of memories. Of burned-out buildings, and towns under siege. Of the sound of distant gunfire that went on night and day. Of old men and women scavenging food and water and firewood. Of entire families forced to flee with nothing but the clothes on their backs, leaving their homes, their histories behind in search of peace.
Of Ireina. The bomb.
He had thought a visit to this mountain cabin would be a return to normalcy. That he could simply put the past behind him and get on with his life. What he hadn’t counted on was the fact that he carried so much baggage. The past was still with him, here in his mind. Haunting him. Taunting him. And the least little spark could set off a firestorm of memories. Some pleasant. A few poignant. All painful.
He paused outside the shed and studied the snowdrifts that reached almost to the roof. Suddenly in his mind he was transported back to that small village outside Bosnia…
In an unexpected downpour, he and his crew had taken refuge in a deserted shed. They huddled around a small fire they’d started on the dirt floor. They had looked up in alarm at the high-pitched whine that signaled an approaching missile. Before they could react, a side of the building was blown away. And with it, their driver. As the rest of the shed slowly collapsed around them, they scrambled free and piled into their truck, keeping one step ahead of the advancing army of terrorists.
The driver—a man from a nearby village—had been young. No more than eighteen. He had taken the dangerous job of driving the news crew in order to help feed his family. He’d had a pretty little dark-eyed girlfriend who had collapsed in grief when she’d heard the news of his death. Jace had learned later that she was carrying the driver’s baby; they’d planned to marry. But the war and chaos in their country had prevented them from seeing it through.