Reclaiming Us

by Richard, Nicole

  “What’s going on?” she asked as she turned back to face me.

  “Ty and I had planned a party . . . but I’d rather be here with you.” I touched her cheek. “Is that okay, or did you want to go and check it out?”

  “Stay here.” She smiled. “Why don’t you put some music on?”

  “Right.” I rushed to the front of the cab; excited thinking that tonight was it. I pulled two condoms from my wallet and tucked them in my front pocket. After the fireworks show, I would lay her down in the bed of my truck and finally show her how much I loved her.

  Tuning the radio to some country station, I shot Ty a quick text saying we weren’t coming down to the party and would watch the fireworks from the bed of my truck.

  I rounded the back of my truck to find Addie standing there.

  “Dance with me?” she asked, her eyes twinkling in the moonlight.

  I nodded and grabbed her hand, locking our fingers together as my other hand slid around her waist. Addie laid her head on my chest, and both of our feet moved in tune to the music. The first few minutes it was nice having her in my arms, but as the second song came to a close, I wanted nothing more than to have her writhing under me. I was sure she could feel how worked up she got me.

  “You look real pretty tonight.”

  “Thank you. You don’t look too bad yourself.” Her hand made its way into the back pocket of my jeans, and she pulled me just a bit closer. I gulped knowing just what she was hinting at, wanting tonight as much as I did. More so, since she had only about a month left before leaving.

  Quit being a piss head.

  Shut the fuck up.

  Don’t start being an idiot now; you’ve got a girl to love on.

  That was for sure.

  I lifted her by the waist so she could stand on my shoes. The third song came on, and I danced the two of us to the slow melody as a sweet woman’s voice crooned about young love and lasting forever. “I love you so much, Addie Mae.”

  “I love you, too.” She squeezed my neck a little tighter. “This will always be my favorite song.” She moved her head from my chest to get a good look at me. “Anytime you hear this song, think of me okay?”

  My throat grew thick with emotion, but I couldn’t let her know how much that had affected me. “This’ll always be our song.”

  She smiled and whispered, “Our song,” as I slowly walked her backward until her legs hit the tailgate of my truck. I dipped low and kissed her. Her mouth was soft and warm, always tasting like bubble gum and by the way she tangled her tongue with mine confirmed we both craved for more. “Babe—” Addie gasped as she turned in time to see a shower of blues and greens fill the night sky. I wanted to cuss out Tyler for ruining our moment, but Addie looked impossibly beautiful as the colored lights danced around her. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and rested my chin on the top of her head. The next one shot into the sky, exploding in white lights high above. They were beautiful, but I could not stop the little tingle of nerves that settled into the pit of my stomach. They were beautiful, they were also illegal as fuck, and I didn’t want to have the night ruined by the red and blues.

  “It’s so pretty,” she said in awe. “I can’t believe you and Ty pulled this off.”

  “Me either, especially since he has a big mouth.” We laughed.

  This was it. It was finally going to happen. What if I did this all wrong?

  Need clouded RJ’s hooded eyes and I felt his desire for me by the bulge in his jeans.

  His hands were gentle as he cupped my face. The rough skin of his thumb brushing over my bottom lip caused a delicious kind of friction that made my heart skip a beat. I had fantasized about this day for quite some time, wondering if all that Lilly had told me was true. All the feelings and emotions involved with having sex, more so the first time, could make or possibly break any relationship.

  RJ’s hands descended to my waist. The swirl of love and lust shone in his eyes, and I could practically see him trying to hold onto his control. That didn’t work for me. I wanted him to let go.

  He dipped his head closer to mine, but instead of closing the distance between our lips, he hovered for a few seconds. Afraid to move and break the moment between us, I watched his eyes dart to my mouth before they closed in a long, slow blink. Then, as if his whole world depended on the taste of my lips, his mouth landed hard on mine, and he inhaled so deeply I just knew that I had become his very air. I did my best to remind myself to breathe.

  The kiss was consuming and made a slow heat start to burn deep in my belly. I squirmed, not really knowing if I wanted the feeling to go away or if I wanted more of it, and RJ broke the kiss. I wanted to tell him to come back, but I couldn’t force the words out around the disappointment lodged in my throat. Surely, he knew what I wanted, didn’t he? Did he not want it? Oh my god. What if he didn’t? There was an instant tingle in the backs of my eyes, and I was furiously trying to blink it away as RJ opened the cab of the truck, riffled around for a minute, and then shut the door again. When he reappeared in front of me, he was holding two thick blankets with a couple of pillows on top. I smiled and shook my head, more at my own crazy thoughts than at the fact that he actually had a makeshift bed hidden in his truck.

  “What?” He shrugged with a sheepish smile on his lips. “I can hope, can’t I?”

  I looked him dead in the eye. “Yes, yes you can, but no more hoping.”

  One of his eyebrows arched, and I ran my tongue across my bottom lip, excitement coursing through every crevice straight to my soul. With puffed cheeks, RJ blew out a warm breath toward the heavens.

  “You sure, babe? I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time, but I can wait—” I pressed two fingers against his lips and nodded.

  We worked together, spreading the blankets out so they covered the majority of the bed of the truck. I positioned the pillows at the top and lay myself down. It was a bit uncomfortable, but tonight I didn’t care.

  When RJ was stretched out next to me and had moved his leg over both of mine, I didn’t care about anything other than him. He rested his forehead on my shoulder and drew lazy lines up and down my arm. But why wasn’t he kissing me? Why did I feel this overwhelming sense of hesitation from him?

  “RJ?” I spoke softly.

  “Yeah, babe?” He kept his head buried in the crook of my neck.

  “What’s the matter?”

  He sighed. “This is it, we’ve waited so long, and I’m trying to summon my control—”

  “Why?”

  A guttural groan filled the air. “Babe, you’re giving me the green light, and all I can think about is shoving you up against the cab of this truck . . .” He groaned again, but his words caused the warmth to burn again. This needed to happen already. “But this needs to be special. This is our first time. Maybe we should wait? We could go to a hotel or someplace nice.”

  He had to be joking. I wanted to laugh, but I didn’t. It didn’t matter where we were. I was with him! How could he not know that he was the only person in this world I would ever want and I would take him any way I could get him. I reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it up his back. I hoped he would catch the hint and take it off—and he did. There was my tall, handsome, lanky-with-muscles-in-all-the-right-places boyfriend. I smiled in appreciation.

  “RJ, we’ve waited long enough.” I closed my eyes and for the first time, there was no reservation. “I want this with you, right here. This is perfect.”

  Craning his neck, he touched his lips to mine while his hands roamed gently under my dress. A flush rose across every inch of my body. RJ sat up on his haunches, bringing me with him.

  “Let’s get your dress off.” He reached behind me to the zipper and then moved first one and then the other strap off my shoulder. I wasn’t wearing a bra under it, and I was fully exposed to him. In an instant, his hands were on me, burning my skin in their wake. My hands itched to unbutton his jeans, and have my way with him.

  “Stand up, ba
be.”

  I did, and he shimmied my dress over my hips and down my legs. The humid air on my naked skin caused a shiver to run the length of my spine.

  “Don’t move.” He pressed his nose at my pelvic bone, grabbed my hips, and pulled me closer to his face. Even though we had played and fooled around before, this felt different. It was a bit more awkward, and because I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do with my hands right then, I crossed them in front of me. Instinctively, my arms covered up my breasts, and RJ nipped a little too close for comfort.

  “RJ . . .” I softly sighed his name.

  He looked at me with hooded eyes, but when he hooked his thumbs under the sides of my panties and pulled them down my legs, his eyes followed the descent of the fabric. Blinking rapidly, I swallowed repeatedly and watched every single one of his movements. Each time he touched me, the butterflies swarmed, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t freaking out a little. We’ve waited a really long time for this. I just hoped after it was all said and done, I would still be everything he needed.

  RJ tapped my foot, then the next one, and tossed my panties to the side. A prickly tingling sensation broke out all over my body, my heartbeat faster than it ever had before. I was completely exposed to him and the outside world. I was quite literally naked outside, which was strange even though I knew there wasn’t another soul around for at least half a mile.

  Then he kissed me, and it was soft, sweet, and everything I needed in that moment to push away all the uncertainty inside me.

  The second my eyes caught sight of Addie’s naked body, I had to talk myself down; remembering the pointers AJ had given at one time.

  I held her hand close to my lips. When I kissed her knuckles, I made sure to look straight into her deep blue eyes. Savoring the vision before me, the three words that meant everything in the world to me slipped from my lips between kisses. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too,” she replied with a hint of shyness.

  “Lie down, babe,” I said softly. I popped the button of my jeans and maneuvered them off, tossing them to the side. My boxer briefs were tented with my borderline painful erection pushing against the black cotton. I stroked myself a few times, and Addie’s eyes widened then darted down and back up. I smirked.

  “Take them off. I don’t want anything in between us,” she ordered in a soft but brave tone.

  Scooting closer, I slowly pulled them down before kicking them off. My cock sprung out and bobbed against my stomach. Addie let a giggle escape, and a smile pulled at the corner of my lips. Thank fuck the tension was broken, now it was time to love my girl. I hoped I would last long enough to please her and not bust a nut right at the get-go.

  “Are you comfortable?” I asked, not sure where my sudden case of nerves came from. Addie nodded, but her body begged to differ. I pulled the second blanket over us and pressed against her.

  She nodded and pulled my mouth to hers, and the touch of her lips along with the way her naked skin was pressed against mine almost drove me insane. I leaned in and trailed kisses down her neck as my hand freely roamed to her side, exploring her sexy body.

  The tiny noises that slipped from her lips fueled my efforts to slide a finger into her. Addie’s body arched into mine, she let out a loud moan, and rode my finger. Fuck, she was hot. I watched her come close to losing it before I stopped.

  “Babe, I gotta get a condom.” I reached for my jeans, but Addie grabbed my arm, stopping me. When she shook her head, pulled me closer, and wrapped her legs around my waist, I was so close, but I fought the urge to press into her tight heat.

  “I’m on the pill. I don’t want anything between us. Not this time.”

  “I don’t know, Addie. You think that’s a good idea?” I cleared my throat. “I mean, I’m all for feeling you, but . . .” Apprehension filled me. “Wait.” I stared at her, confused. “How did you get the pill? How come you’re taking . . . We haven’t done anything yet for you to be taking the pill.”

  Addie giggled. “I’m eighteen. I can go to the clinic and get birth control by myself.”

  She didn’t give me a chance to speak before she closed the distance I had put between us and kissed me. Maybe just this one time, our first time, I would give this to her anyway she wanted. Yet, my heart and head were at war. After tonight, how would I let her go, our hearts and souls would be connected for an eternity. But then how could I not?

  “RJ, please make love to me,” she whispered against my lips, completely wiping away any reservations I may have had.

  Without a word, I found my perfect spot right between her thighs. My head ducked to the crook of her neck. “If you’re gonna love me, promise me it’s a forever love, Addie Mae.” I supported my weight on my elbows and stalled at her entrance. I wouldn’t go farther until she promised. I needed the words. “Promise me, babe.”

  “I promise.”

  Sex hurt, but, at the same time, it felt beyond amazing. Or was it because RJ and I shared each other’s first time made it that much more special?

  The words he whispered right before claiming my virginity branded themselves on my heart, and I swore I would never forget such a sweet plea—never.

  After the initial awkwardness, he flowed a bit easier in and out of me. The sensations, minus the burn, were remarkable. I hadn’t known what, or if, I should have been doing, if anything, but he seemed to have had it under control. So I lay there with a death grip around his biceps and reveled in the tingling sensations that crept all over my body.

  This was completely different from when we would mess around. RJ’s labored breathing, his grunting close to my ear, and the sweat beads that rubbed from his skin to mine appeased my senses. That was about the time a feeling similar to a waterfall just about ready to fall over the ledge had me wanting to meet his thrusting.

  “Oh, shit,” RJ blurted out.

  My thighs automatically squeezed, encasing his body with mine, and I held on to the build-up. If he kept moving the way he was, it was almost guaranteed I would have an orgasm.

  My lungs struggled a little more than normal to breathe. I waited in anticipation as I dug my fingernails into RJ’s back and pushed my head against the bed of the truck, arching against him and urging him to keep doing what he was doing.

  With his thrusts gaining strength, he pounded against the apex of my thighs and swelled even bigger inside me.

  “Oh, fuck.” He thrust in and out, turning his head against my neck and pressing open‑mouthed kisses to my skin. “So good . . .” He took a deep breath and shuttered. “Ahh, fuck yes, Addie!”

  I was still hovering somewhere between the pleasure and the pain, needed something . . . I didn’t know what, to push myself over the ledge I knew was there. Then he stilled, his whole body tensing up. My heart stopped with him. Had I done something wrong? The pleasure I had been feeling fled, and the traitorous prickling behind my eyes started again.

  “Shit,” he mumbled, his face still buried in the crook of my neck. “Sorry for the language. I couldn’t help myself, it felt too good.”

  Then, just like that, I let out a sigh of relief.

  “Don’t even worry about it.” I ran my fingers through his hair.

  “I love you, Addie Mae. I love you so damn much.”

  “I love you, too.”

  I was so in love.

  After RJ found some napkins to clean me up, we snuggled under the thick comforter and stared up at the stars. Everything about this night was magical and perfect, even if I didn’t have an orgasm like I had hoped. Regardless, I could not contain the smile that stretched across my face. If it weren’t for the fact that I was still naked, I would have jumped up and down, shouting to the moon and stars about just how much I loved him.

  “Here, put this on.” RJ held his shirt up.

  I sat up, pulled his shirt over my head, and paused while I took in his scent. Deodorant and a musky smell filled my nose. I inhaled deeper as I cuddled into him. Drawing lazy circles along the length of
my arm, pressing little kisses to the side of my head, he left me in a tranquil state. Fantasizing about the life we could have together, I reconsidered his offer of marriage and mentally thought up ways that we could make it work. I could honestly say, without a doubt, RJ would always own my heart. It may be naive to think, especially since we were so young, but I was willing to bet my life on it.

  “Hey, you okay, babe? Did you . . . come?” His voice was tender and sweet.

  “I’m good.” I turned to face him and hesitated before answering, shaking my head. “How about you? How was it for you?”

  “Shit. I’m sorry, Addie. I got so caught up in how good you felt, I didn’t even think. I’m sorr—”

  “Shh, don’t even apologize. It’s fine, I promise. Besides, I’ve heard that a lot of girls don’t their first time.”

  He tilted his head a bit and fixed his eyes on me. “And where did you hear that?”

  “The Internet.”

  “Right.” He chuckled. “Because everything is true on the Internet.”

  With a knowing smile and a gentle hand, he held one side of my face close to his and changed the route of our conversation. “I love you so much.” His eyes fell closed, and he kissed me sweetly before asking, “Are you sore at all?”

  “Honestly?” He nodded. “I’m a little sore, but as long as you’re here to hold me, it doesn’t hurt so much.”

  “Addie Mae, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He squeezed me a little tighter.

  “No, babe. You didn’t hurt me. It’s just . . . new, you know? I couldn’t be any happier than I am right now. I love you so much.”

  “Me, too.”

  “Now that I know what this feels like, I’m not sure I’ll be able to handle not having you next to me for long periods of time.” My words hit me just a second after I said them. I would be leaving in a month. Thirty days. That was it, and then I wouldn’t have a choice but to be away from him.

  “Addie. Don’t.” He paused. “Please don’t ruin this, let’s just be in the moment. No yesterday, no tomorrow, just tonight.”