Reclaiming Us

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Reclaiming Us Page 23

by Richard, Nicole


  “You motherfucker.”

  “Look here, asshole, you lost your chance when you stuck your dick in some cunt, you fucking idiot.” RJ’s voice dropped. “So, listen here and listen well . . . you are never to step foot in this house, this town, or in Addie’s fucking air space ever again. We clear?”

  Silence.

  “You! You’re the one.” Jase was seething, which was actually kind of comical. It was like watching a kitten bow up against a lion. RJ just smiled in self-satisfaction, figuring that I had talked to Jase about him and our history.

  “You!” he said again before lunging toward RJ, who casually took a step back. I snorted. I couldn’t help it. How had I not seen how pathetic Jase was before? Jase pinned his hard glare on me, but pointed at RJ. “That fucking tattoo is for him. He’s the one, isn’t he? ” His eyes went cold and flat. “I gave you everything, but I never stood a fucking chance, did I?” Jase yelled furiously, throwing his fist in the air.

  I held my chin high. Did he really think my tattoo didn’t have some kind of meaning or better yet, was meant for someone?

  “Maybe you never stood a chance at my whole heart.”

  “He’s the reason you wouldn’t get that thing removed.” Jase said, calming down a bit, as a self‑deprecating smile pulled at his lips. “How the fuck could you love someone who wasn’t there for you when you were pregnant?” I flinched at his words and closed my eyes, not wanting to witness my whole world shatter around me. How the fuck did he know? How did he find out? I’d never told him. Oh, God. RJ. No. I hadn’t told him. I was never going to keep it from him, but he would never believe that. He would leave me, taking my heart and soul with him. A strangled noise worked its way up my throat, and I pressed my fingertips over my mouth and shook my head. “Who wasn’t there for you when—”

  “Stop!” I screamed through the tears running down my cheeks, my eyes still shut tight against the world around me. I was a little kid, closing my eyes to make myself hide. At first, I thought he actually listened to me and shut his mouth—small miracle if there was one—but then the sound of someone gasping for air had me flipping my lids. Jase’s face and neck were turning red as he clawed at RJ’s hands, which were currently wrapped around his throat.

  RJ leaned close to Jase’s ear. “That girl in there is mine. Always has been, always will be. I don’t know what sick game you’re playing, but it ends right fucking now.” He squeezed Jase’s throat until his own knuckles turned white. “It would be good for you to remember that,” RJ gritted, hatred seeping through his pores. He opened the front door and tossed Jase out on his ass.

  Jase caught his bearings, and I got a good look at the man I barely even knew. In the beginning, he had seemed sweet and attentive, charmed the pants off me. The man glaring up at RJ and me wasn’t that man, and I wondered if he ever really had been. Jase scoffed and rubbed at his throat, which was ringed with a deep red.

  “Fuck you, you fucking prick. She’s my fiancée—”

  “Oh, Lord.” I heard Evin breathe out a deep sigh.

  “Was,” RJ enunciated flatly before slamming the door shut so hard I jumped.

  He bowed his head, rolled his shoulders, and when he turned to face me, a feeling I refused to define dropped to the pit of my stomach, leaving me to shake my head denying the thoughts flickering in my mind. The front door inched open just enough for Evin to slip inside before she closed it again.

  “I’ll make myself scarce,” she muttered, throwing us both apologetic looks before hurrying down the hall.

  Unwilling to let RJ’s head spiral for another second, I went to him. I wished he had found out a different way, but he knew and I wouldn’t let him go another minute without an explanation.

  “Is it true . . . were you really pregnant?”

  “Yes,” my voice quivered.

  “Was it mine?”

  What the fuck!

  “Yes.”

  “And you told that fucking prick, but never thought to mention it to me?” I hated hearing the anger in his voice.

  “I never told Jase.” I shook my head, never feeling so nervous in my life.

  “Apparently, he knew more than I ever fucking did.”

  “I can explain if you give me a chance.”

  “Go check on Evin.”

  His mind must be staggering around Jase’s words, trying to process the information. I had a good idea how he felt, yet I’ve had some time to come to terms with it.

  “Is this you leaving me? Am I the one who’s getting left behind this time?

  “RJ, don’t. Let’s talk about this.” I reached for him, but he stepped out of reach before opening my front door and closing it softly behind himself.

  I struggled to remain upright when all my heart wanted to do was crumble.

  My mind raced, questioning his every word. If he did call, would it be to tell me this was over before it started, that he couldn’t take the fact too much had happened during our time apart? But he made love to me last night, he told me there was no turning back, that I could kick and scream and he would never let me go. Did his actions contradict his words?

  Terrified, I berated myself for not chasing after him and sorting this all out instead of him pondering on the hateful words Jase spewed.

  I could shoot that bastard in the kneecaps if I owned a gun.

  “Addie,” Evin said before laying her hand on my shoulder. “Addie, what happened?” I shrugged in slow motion, still trying to figure it out for myself. “Come and sit.”

  She took my hand and led me to the couch. We sat, and I stared mindlessly across the room as my body went numb.

  He left.

  He looked so angry—so broken. And it was me that did it to him—again.

  “Will you please talk to me?” I turned to look at her. She was worried, but I couldn’t bring myself to reassure her I would be okay. I wouldn’t be okay.

  “He told him—” I couldn’t say the words. They choked me, sliced me, and burned me.

  “Jase? What did he do?”

  “He . . . he told RJ about the baby.” I choked, and the tears fell. “Then RJ threw him out. He thinks I lied to him.” I closed my eyes, willing the tears to stop. How could this be happening? Why was this happening? Jase did this to me. No. I did this to myself. I did this by not telling RJ the second we started talking again or any of the hundreds of times after that. I did this. Jase was an asshole and had no right to say what he did. If I ever saw him again, I wouldn’t be held responsible for my actions, but this one was on me.

  “Hey,” Evin grabbed my hand, “did he say anything before he left?”

  I nodded then opened my eyes. “He said to go and check on you.” I sniffled and wiped more tears from under my eyes.

  “Well, maybe you should give him a little time. He did just find out you were pregnant once upon a time and never told him. That’s gotta be messing with his head right now.”

  I shrugged, not knowing anything anymore. Jase proved that a lying deceiving bastard was easily camouflaged. It wouldn’t be a far stretch for RJ to think I was the same kind of horrible as Jase.

  “We had sex, Ev . . . the things he said to me.” I hung my head in my hands. My heart yearned for him—for us. “I wanted to believe him, and honestly, I should. Maybe it’s me I don’t trust.”

  “Addie, don’t do that.” She rubbed my back. “This was not your fault. You didn’t make Jase come here, and you didn’t make him say those things.” She offered me a sad smile and took my hand between both of hers. “Remember, he had no idea you were pregnant, this has got to be a shock to him, but I’m sure, once he processes it all, he’ll call or come over.” Her hands tightened enough to make me look at her. “Jase is a fucking prick.” She rolled her eyes and shook her head in irritation.

  “Tell me about it. I can’t believe I almost married that asshole.”

  “Well, didn’t I always tell you how much I disliked him? Would it make you feel better if I told you RJ seems like a good g
uy?”

  “What would I do without you, Ev?”

  “How about we promise to never find out?”

  “Promise.” She smiled. “Where did you end up staying last night, anyway? I hope you checked out because there is no way you are staying there another night.”

  “I didn’t stay at a hotel,” she replied slowly as a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

  Huh? “Well, where did you stay then? Please don’t tell me you slept out in your car—”

  “No. Not in my car.” Evin’s smile continued to grow.

  She didn’t stay at a hotel, and she wasn’t stupid and slept in her car. She didn’t know anyone else here except for . . .

  “Oh my god! You didn’t?”

  “No, nothing happened. Come on, you know me better than that. Dane was sweet and all, and he asked to hang out again, but. . .” I knew what she didn’t want to say. For all her swagger and bravado, she didn’t think very highly of herself. It was a shame because she was one of the more genuine, beautiful women I knew.

  “Well, it’s not like you to have a sleepover at a strange guy’s house, either.”

  “I couldn’t really stay with you.” The knowing look she gave me made me squirm. “Besides, you were right, he is a good guy.” I snickered at the way she got dreamy eyed; this was definitely new territory. Evin Prescott never got dreamy eyed when it came to men.

  “So, how did you end up at his place?”

  “Easy. He refused to take me to a hotel. He said any friend of Addie’s was a friend of his, and that it wouldn’t be right if he didn’t offer his Southern hospitality.”

  I giggled. Yup, that was definitely Dane Crenshaw. “And you just went with it?”

  “I tried to argue with him! I even went to the extent of walking out of his front door, but man, he was persistent.” She looked away, and when she spoke again, I knew he had started to chip away at her walls. “There’s something about him. . . I shouldn’t feel like this, it goes against everything I’ve worked so hard for.” She sighed. “All right, enough about me.” Evin hopped up. “Are you feeling any better?”

  “I guess. I mean, maybe I should give him a little space, and if he calls—”

  “When he calls,” Evin corrected. “Have a little faith in the guy, would you?”

  I smiled half‑heartedly. “When he calls, then we can talk and see where we go from there.”

  “Good.” Evin held her hand out for me to take. “Let’s go and get some coffee.” We both looked at our attire. “But let’s get changed first.”

  “Deal. Don’t blame me if you end up moving here just for the coffee shop, though.”

  “I can’t promise that.”

  When I had heard that fucking prick carelessly give away important information the way he had, I saw red. He had no business and should be thanking his lucky fucking stars that all I did was throw him out on his ass.

  Leaving Addie’s house the way I did left my mind in a tailspin. Had I been acting reasonably, I could’ve stayed and have her explain like she begged, but in that second, I couldn’t even look at her.

  How the fuck could she not tell me?

  She asked me to make love to her, and she hadn’t fucking told me something that important. I punched the mattress at my sides, fuming and wondering who Addie had become. The girl I knew wouldn’t have kept something like that from me.

  “FUCK!” I pulled at my hair. Was ten in the morning too early to start drinking? I pushed myself out of bed and went straight for the bathroom and yanked the medicine cabinet open, hoping just by some crazy chance a bottle of those magic pills would miraculously show up.

  Why did I have to flush them all?

  “A baby?” I asked the man looking back at me. “And what the fuck happened to this baby? I was supposed to be a dad.” I let out a slow deep breath, and my head fell back. Had she known she was pregnant when she left me? My pulse thrummed at the thought, and anger and guilt collided in my gut.

  She had tried calling me so many times, and I never answered. I let every call go straight to voice mail. I’d deleted every message without listening or reading it. There was no way I could have talked to her back then. Not with the way she up and left me.

  Shit.

  I had assumed she had been calling me to apologize and beg for my forgiveness. I had been too hurt and too goddamn self-centered to even consider she had been calling for anything else.

  There was no way I could have imagined she was pregnant and trying to tell me.

  Still, this was my fucking fault. What the hell was I going to do now?

  Without having anything to calm me, I went back to my bedroom and lay back down. I would have to get myself in check before I contacted her. I didn’t need her to see me in this kind of state. I needed to do something, but I needed to work this shit out first. I just got her back, and there was no way I was ready to let go, but how do I even begin to process this?

  Why wouldn’t she just tell me?

  Because it’s probably hard for her to think about, dumbass.

  Shut up, dick.

  I’m not the one throwing a pity party when he should be comforting his girl, idiot.

  Needing to shut up my own damn thoughts, I pulled the half‑empty bottle from the bedside table and drank until I couldn’t breathe. Until I could formulate some kind of conclusion, I didn’t have the strength to be of right mind.

  Tack. Tack. Tack.

  Standing outside of Addie’s bedroom window with a few pebbles still in my hand, I contemplated whether she would even be willing to talk to me after the way I left the other night. I put two days of no contact between us to process every word that prick said. There was no way I would expose Addie to the likelihood of my snapping. Luckily, none of that happened, proving yet again that, with some time to think, I could control my own emotions.

  Tack. Tack.

  A silhouette floated behind the curtain, and I waited to see what she would do next. Addie opened her window and stood there, looking as unsure as I was a few seconds ago. There was no reason for her to feel that way.

  When she didn’t say anything, I jerked my chin to the open window and smirked. “No screen.”

  She worked hard to bite back the cutest smile and shook her head. “Nope. They always seem to disappear from my bedroom window. I have no idea why.” Her answer made me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The short distance between us disappeared in two long strides, and I reached for the back of her neck and brought her mouth to mine. Heaven. Her lips were soft and inviting as I kissed her. I tugged at her bottom lip, and she let a tiny giggle slip when she pulled away.

  “What are you doing here?” Her eyes were playful, but her voice hinted suspicion.

  “I wanted you to come out for a minute.”

  Addie glanced down at her nightshirt, tilted her head to the side, and smiled. I missed this carefree side of her, and I was glad she hadn’t completely lost it.

  “Or you could come in?”

  “Nope.” I chuckled. “Get dressed, and meet me at my truck?” I gave her one more kiss, and then turned to walk away before she could protest. “Maybe bring some clothes for a couple days,” I called over my shoulder as I picked up my pace, expecting her to ask questions or come up with an excuse not to come with me.

  “Give me a couple of minutes. I need to tell Evin I’m going out for a bit,” she said, shocking me enough to stop and turn back to her.

  “Make sure you tell her you won’t be back tonight.”

  It didn’t take long before Addie came strolling out her front door, looking all kinds of beautiful. She wasn’t wearing a stitch of makeup, her legs were covered in stretchy pants, and she was wearing a hoodie that I thought I lost. This woman didn’t even have to try. She was a knockout.

  “Hey.” She tossed her bag on the floorboard, hopped in, and pressed a kiss to my cheek just like she used to do. Damn, I had missed her.

  “You good? Evin okay?”

  “Yeah, sh
e said she was probably going to head out in the morning.” Her smile faded. “She’s got a few drafts to edit, and a new author is being ridiculous, wanting a seven‑day turnaround . . . so where to?” She buckled up.

  “Take a wild guess?” It took her a split second before she gave me that knowing look, and her bright smile reappeared. “All right then.” I turned the key in the ignition and started out east toward our spot on the Crenshaw property. I had so much to say, so many questions to ask, yet I couldn’t speak at all. When she came to her window, it was as if my storming out of her house never happened. I didn’t know how to react, so I went with it. Not that it was a big chore or anything. Addie was everything I had ever wanted, and being away from her was almost painful. Addie’s sweet smell filled my senses, and I concentrated on that as she tried to be slick as she snuck glances at me. It was so damn adorable. Eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore and lifted my arm so she could lean into me, which she did.

  Her body relaxed against mine, and I twirled her ponytail between my fingers. Time and time again, I had asked myself if it was really this easy with us or if I had just imagined it. The little touches or stolen side glances. How easy it was to get lost in her and forget my own damn name when we kissed.

  I squeezed the side of her arm as I pulled onto the gravel road, and she shifted so she could see the view. I wanted nothing more than to freeze time right then. It was a perfect moment.

  “I’m sorry I left the way I did,” I opened the conversation with a gentle apology.

  “You don’t have to apologize.” Addie placed her palm over my heart. “I understand why you needed to leave. I’m just glad you came back.”

  “I have so many questions, but I have no idea where to start.”

  “There’s no need to rush,” she reassured me, resting her head against my shoulder and fiddling with the hem of my Henley.

  “All those times you tried calling . . .” I needed to know if her calls were to tell me she was pregnant, but I had to know if the baby was mine. “Was then when you found out?”

  “It was. When you wouldn’t pick up, I figured you were just still mad at me. It wasn’t as if I left in the best way, but I needed you to know.” I was such a fool, and I opened my mouth to tell her as much, but then she continued. “I drove home. Did your mom tell you?”

 

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