by Shady Grim
“Why does Nicky take food from yeh, but hides in his shell when I do it?” She was obviously very hurt by Nicky’s show of favoritism.
“Because you move too fast, that scares him. There are two rules you have to follow if you want a turtle to like you. First, you have to be slow and gentle. Turtles don’t like to be handled roughly. Second, turtles love gossip. If you whisper all your secrets to him, he’ll like you better.”
“That’s not true,” she said, putting her hands on her hips to punctuate her disbelief.
“Yes, it is. That’s why turtles move so slowly, their shells are full of all the secrets they’ve ever been told. If you tell Nicky a secret, he’ll never repeat it to anyone else, not even another turtle. Turtles are so good at keeping secrets that God gave them all of His secrets for safekeeping.”
“What happens when a turtle dies, where do all the secrets go?”
“They take their secrets with them to Heaven.”
“Animals don’t go to Heaven, only people do.”
“Well, I believe they do. Heaven’s big enough for everyone. I think it’s selfish of people not to want to share it.”
“Well, I don’t mind sharin’ it. I like animals.”
“I think they like you too. Are you looking forward to Jimmy coming next week?”
“Yeah, I hope he’s fun. It gets borin’ here without other kids sometimes.” She went back to feeding Nicky while I finished up weeding the garden. I left her there with Nicky, and headed for the house to get dinner started. Nicky had always been a good listener, and I was sure that Emmy had many things to share with him. On my way to the back porch, I noticed Thor standing in the middle of the back yard with his head up and sniffing the air. This was by no means unusual behavior for a dog and I thought nothing of it. As I turned to go up the porch steps, I heard him let out a short soft bark, and I turned back around to face him. I turned in time to see him lift his tail and drop his head–St. Bernard’s often drop their heads to use them as battering rams–and run toward the line of woods on the side of the house opposite to the driveway and vegetable garden. It was obvious that he caught a scent of some sort so I followed after him thinking that I could likely be rescuing an injured animal. He barked a little when he reached the line of trees and stamped his front paws. He often stamped his front paws when greeting a familiar person. Ethan heard him bark, and met me where I stood behind Thor. This was in the area of woodland where Rachel had disappeared so many years ago and Ethan would never enter it, or allow Emily to play on that side of the house.
“Thor, come here! What’s he doin’?” said Ethan.
“I don’t know. He only acts like this with people he likes. It must be some kind of small animal. He likes little things.” Thor suddenly dashed into the woods. Ethan and I looked at each other in amused confusion, or at least I was amused, he was nervous.
“Maybe it’s Rachel’s ghost,” he whispered.
“How would Thor know Rachel? She died twenty years ago, Thor’s only six.”
“Well, he sees somethin’ he knows.”
“It’s probably just an injured animal. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s brought me one.”
“But he looks like he’s playin’. He wouldn’t do that if somethin’ was hurt. What if it’s a demon? I heard that the Devil appears to people in the wilderness, and that he can also possess animals. Maybe he wants Thor.”
“Have you been reading those horror magazines again? They’re not real.”
“Yeh never know.”
“I’ll just go in and get him.” I followed the now hidden Thor into the shrubby woods.
“Be careful!” shouted Ethan as he stood wringing his hands and peering into the woods after me. I found Thor sniffing at a dense patch of bushes, and I called for him to join me. He ignored me and continued to investigate the shrubbery.
“Oh, alright, I’ll look.” I knelt down to look under the bushes. Just as I bent my head down, the shrubbery shook violently, and I sprang away from them. I noticed Thor preparing to make chase and dove on him. As I rose to my feet, I took hold of the scruff of his neck and pulled him with me. He disliked my show of dominance and grumbled a complaint, but offered me no resistance. When we reached the tree line, we found Ethan standing in the same spot and still wringing his hands. “It was just a deer,” I said as I walked past him and let go of Thor’s fur.
“Did yeh see it?”
“No, but it sounded big.”
“Then how do yeh know it was a deer? It coulda been a mountain lion or a bear,” he argued as he followed after me, while periodically turning to look behind us.
“I don’t think Thor would’ve been so friendly with either of those animals, nor they with him. At any rate, nothing happened so it really doesn’t matter.”
“It does too matter. What if that was some psycho? We could have a deranged pervert stalkin’ us.”
“Stop being so paranoid, it was just an animal.”
“I don’t know,” he mumbled as he rubbed his chin and stared at the tree line. He then noticed all the dandelions that had popped up all over the property, and kicked one out of the ground with his boot. “Look at all these weeds. Didn’t yeh just mow the other day? Why don’t yeh get some weed killer?”
“I like them. They look like happy little sun-faces dotting the lawn. It’s nice to have something to break up all the green. Besides, they’re nutritious.”
“Leave it to a chick to talk about the benefits of rabbit food. There’s no way yer gonna get me to eat weeds. It ain’t manly. Give me a big thick steak smothered in steak sauce, and some baked potatoes drownin’ in butter, with some greasy onion rings on the side, now that’s manly food.”
“That’s not manly; it’s a heart attack waiting for your fiftieth birthday.”
Chapter Five
It had been some time since I last saw Shelly. She’d moved away to enjoy the city life, and I had continued on to medical school. We kept in touch regularly, but we had only managed to see each other once in the last eight years. Instead of becoming the wild party girl that she had imagined herself to be, she ended up getting married and settling down. They ran off and eloped, much to the heartbreak of her family. She had written to me that they were planning to marry, and I begged her to wait until she knew him better, but romance is impatient. She became pregnant right away, and I was there for the birth of their son, James, named after Shelly’s older brother. I stayed with her for a week after the birth to help care for the new baby while her husband, Rick, worked.
“Who do you think he looks like?” she asked me, admiring the squirmy bundle in her arms. “I think he looks just like his dad.”
“Well, he has Rick’s eyes, but I think he looks like your brother.”
Shelly was tall and slender. She had a fine bone structure, long honey-brown hair, and big round light-blue eyes. She was the pride and joy of her older brother, Jim, who was ten years her senior. Jim was a lifer in the Navy and was of a much more solid build than his sister. He stood six feet three inches tall and weighed well over two hundred pounds. He and Shelly had the same eye color, but Jim’s hair was a very dark brown. They didn’t really resemble each other very much, but the likeness of their eyes was unmistakable. They inherited the shape and color of their eyes from their paternal grandmother, a trait of which they were both immensely proud.
“I was hoping he’d have Nanna’s eyes. Do you really think he looks like Jim?” She screwed up her face and examined her bundle more closely.
“Definitely, he even looks like he’ll be built like Jim. His features are much broader than Rick’s.”
Rick was a slimly built young man of slightly taller than average height. He had dark skin and hair and had dark-brown eyes. He came from a poor unloving family background. He had numerous half brothers and sisters, and his mother was so careless about keeping track of which child belonged to which father that she called all of her lovers’ offspring siblings of her own brood. Rick had relation
s all over the city, and he’d spent time living with most of them. His was a clan of thieves and liars that would sell-out any one of their relatives if there was a profit to be had. He had informed Shelly that he wanted nothing more to do with any of his relatives, and he wanted her to keep little Jimmy away from them too.
“Well, don’t tell Rick. It would hurt his feelings.”
“What do you mean it would hurt his feelings? The kid has to look like somebody. That’s silly, Shell.”
“Rick was hoping for a girl, and he was really disappointed when he found out we were having a boy. It would just make him feel better if you said Jimmy looks like him.”
“Whatever,” I agreed, looking at my watch. “Alright, it’s about time for him to be coming in, so let me get dinner started. I hope Rick likes vegetarian cooking.”
“Oh, he’ll eat anything. He’ll be happy to have a change from my cooking anyway,” she laughed.
“You still haven’t learned to cook?” I said in mock surprise. “You’re a shameful housewife.” She didn’t answer. “Does your brother know?”
“Yes, I wrote to him right before we were married. I didn’t want him to find out from Mom and Dad. He’s very hurt that I didn’t wait and let him meet Rick first. He thinks I should’ve given it more time, but I told him how much I love Rick and how good he is to me.”
“Well, you know that I agree with him about your family meeting Rick, but the decision’s yours. Nobody can tell you what to do. Does he know about the baby?”
“Not yet.”
“I thought it was odd that he wouldn’t be here for you. It’s not like Jim at all. Why didn’t you let him know, I mean it is his only sister’s first baby–?”
“I just haven’t had time yet,” she snapped.
“Okay, I didn’t mean to pry or anything,” I replied, shocked at her reaction.
“I’m just tired is all. I think I have that post birth depression thing going on.”
“Okay, no problem. Uh, why don’t you go lie down for a bit. I can take care of everything.”
“Yeah, okay. I’ll do that...um...sorry I snapped.”
“No problem, I’d be grumpy too after giving birth to that little bruiser. You’ll feel better after you get some sleep.” As I watched her put the baby in the bassinet and walk down the hall of her tiny one-bedroom apartment, I couldn’t help but feel that she would never again be the feisty go-getter that I had known in school. It was like watching a funeral procession as she slowly disappeared into her bedroom with her head hung as if in defeat. I shook my head and thought, “You did it to yourself, Shell. Everyone tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen.” The sound of the front door slamming shut brought me back to reality. “Hey, Rick! How was your day?” I said cheerfully, trying to keep my thoughts from showing on my face.
“It was awful. I’m really beat. I had to work in the rain all day.” He slipped off his boots and sat them on the newspaper that was spread out on the floor next to the door. He hung his jacket on the rack above his boots, and slipped out of his dirty clothes to stand brazenly in his underwear. Although I did think it rather rude to do such a thing with a guest in the house, he didn’t manage to achieve the appalled reaction he was looking for as I was well used to this sort of thing. Ethan and some of his friends often stayed at my apartment before Emily was born, and this was the state in which they normally presented themselves. I’ve often thought that the disparity in modesty level was the greatest difference between mine and Ethan’s personalities. He always felt that it was merely the difference between being a male or a female. I’ve time and again presented him with the fact the my father didn’t approve of such behavior even amongst one’s own family members, and every time Ethan’s response has been, “Well, he’s an old guy and old guys are like that,” however, the point at which a sense of modesty pervades the male character has yet to be identified.
“Oh, is that dinner? Man, I haven’t had a home-cooked meal since I moved in with Shell. She never cooks.”
“You don’t know how lucky you are. I tried to teach her, and I can tell you with confidence that she’s a lost cause. She’s the absolute worst cook I’ve ever seen.” I leaned down to open the oven door and said, “But that’s not all, I made a few loaves of bread and there’s an apple pie in the fridge.”
“I should’ve married you!” he said as he washed his hands in the kitchen sink.
“I guarantee you wouldn’t be able to stand me.”
“So where did you learn to cook?” he said as he sat down at the table and waited for his dinner.
“My mom, her whole family likes to cook and bake. We all like to eat too, so the two go hand in hand.” I placed a loaf of bread in front of him. “You get the honors. I never slice it evenly.”
“That’s a little unnerving coming from someone who’s going to be a surgeon.”
I put my finger to my lips, “Shh, don’t tell anyone.”
“Your secret is safe with me. So, where’s Shell?”
“Oh, she went to take a nap. She wasn’t feeling well. I’ll just go and see if she’s ready to eat.” I walked down the little hallway with its creaky uneven floor and walls roughly covered in flaking paint until I reached her bedroom. I knocked lightly on her door and whispered, “Shelly, are you awake?” I peeked in the door and saw her sleeping soundly. I didn’t want to wake her, so I quietly made my way back to the kitchen. “It looks like it’s just you and me, Rick. She’s asleep already. I’ll just heat this up for her later.” I wrapped up her plate and put it in the fridge. “Don’t you want to get a look at your little man before you start eating?” I was surprised that he didn’t check, or ask about, the new baby. He didn’t even look up from his plate as he answered me.
“After I relax and get cleaned up. I don’t want to get too close to him smelling like gasoline and car grease.”
“Well, if nothing else, at least he’s a good eater,” I thought to myself as I watched him shovel vast amounts of food into his mouth. I thought it polite to try and make conversation, so I said the only thing I could think of. “My cousin and his wife just had a baby a few months ago. They had a girl, and she looks just like her dad. He’s so thrilled with her, he never puts her down. As soon as she hears his voice, she cries until he picks her up. I have a picture of her...” I pulled a picture from my wallet and handed it to him.
“You always keep a wallet in your pocket?” he smirked.
“Mmmhmm,” I answered, stabbing at my dinner.
“Don’t you carry a purse?”
“No, I find them cumbersome, and I have a tendency to misplace them.”
“You’re a strange chick,” he snickered as he looked at the photograph.
“So I’ve been told. She’s a pretty baby, isn’t she?”
“Oh yeah, she’s cute. That’s what I wanted...a girl, but she had James instead. I mean, he’s great too. It’s just that I was hoping for a girl. You know how it is.” When he realized that I wasn’t going to respond he quickly added, “But at least he’s healthy, right?”
“That’s right, at least he’s healthy,” I repeated as I slid the photo back into my wallet. We finished our meal in silence. I washed up the dishes while Rick showered and was just finishing putting them away when Rick hollered to me.
“There’s a fight on tonight. Shell told me you like boxing. She said your dad was a boxer or something?”
“Dad was in the military. Boxing was just a hobby. But I do enjoy a good match.”
“I never met a girl that liked boxing. They all think it’s too violent. I know Shell hates it,” he said while clicking the remote control. “Do you box too, or do you just like to watch it?”
“Oh yeah, I can box. Dad always thought that everyone should learn self-defense, particularly women,” I answered as I sat down beside him on their ratty old couch. “So, exactly what kind of work do you do?”
“Right now I work at a gas station, but I really want to be an artist.”
&nbs
p; “Do you mean like a sculptor or a painter?”
“Cartoonist...I’d like to be a cartoonist. I love anime. Have you ever seen it?” he asked excitedly.
“Yeah, I’ve seen it. I like it. So are you planning on going to school?”
“I’d like to, but I never seem to be able to get up enough money.” He got up from the couch and started for the hallway. “Would you like to see some of my stuff?”
“Absolutely.”
He disappeared into the bedroom for a moment and emerged with a tattered red folder full of drawings. I paged through the thick pile of papers and was able to see a clear development of skill as I progressed from older pieces to newer ones.
“These are really good, Rick. Did you do all of these free hand?”
“Oh yeah, I don’t trace anything. I did all of these myself.” He put his arm on the back of the couch behind me and leaned in to explain his work. As I was looking closely at one of his drawings, he leaned in and kissed me. I instinctively thrust my elbow into his chest. He flew backwards and lay against the arm of the couch rubbing his hand over his bruised chest.
I quietly but venomously said, “What the hell’s the matter with you? Your wife, who just gave birth to your son, is sleeping right in the next room!”
Still stunned, he stammered out an answer, “Oh God, I’m really sorry. I don’t know why I did that.”
“Yeah, well I’ve got a pretty good idea, and it’s not happening, got it?”
“You won’t tell Shell, will you?”
“No, I won’t tell her because, unlike you, I care about her.” I was angry, but not in the least bit shocked by his behavior. I pegged him for this type the moment I laid eyes on him. The only problem was how to get Shelly to see it without her blaming me. That kind of realization is usually best left to time. She’d have to see for herself what Rick really was. If even her beloved brother couldn’t convince her to be more patient, then how was I going to get through to her? Love is blind, deaf, and dumb, and its sensibilities rarely improve with age.
“What’s going on?” said Shelly as she silently emerged from the hallway.