Without one tear my mother handed me my lunch, drove me to school, and went to work. I came home from school to an empty house. My father never told me goodbye. He was just gone. I stumbled back into the present, leaving behind all those bad memories and listened to my mother.
“It has been horrific. I am glad he finally went to bed. If I had to hear one more story about the guys or the lodge or his perfect wife with the perfect boobs and the perfect hair.” She groaned and turned to pick up a blanket from the couch she had obviously been cuddled in. “Well, I think I would go insane.”
I grinned watching my mother wad the blanket up into a gnarl of multicolored cotton. Obviously her attempt of folding it went out the door with her irritation. I knew she was not quite done with her rant about my father. Austin chucked under his breath. My mother returned her green eyes back to my face momentarily. She gave up on the blanket and let the clumped up mess drop back down to the couch. She flitted her gaze back and forth between Austin and I before she landed her blazing green on me.
“You know those boobs on that woman are fake,” she said sourly, and it was not a question.
“I figured as much, Mom.”
“Austin,” my mother said, turning her fury in his direction.
Oh crap, Mom’s going to let it rip.
“You’re a man, so tell me. Do you honestly find fake boobs attractive?”
Without the bat of an eye Austin smiled. “No, Cynthia,” he assured.
“Hussy,” my mother muttered under her breath.
Not wanting to talk about Veronica, my father’s third wife and the hussy in question, I chose to pull the conversation back to my mother’s original irritation.
“I guess I should have called to let you know how late we would be. Sorry for worrying you, Mom.”
With a hint of a smile my mother seemed to calm a degree or two and said, “I’m just glad you are home. We have a lot to do, and you need your rest.”
My mother’s disapproving green eyes turned to Austin. “And you need your rest as well, Austin.” This was her way of asking him to leave I was sure.
“I promise I will get to bed soon. I need to tell Austin goodnight first.”
I watched a true smile of satisfaction creep over my mother’s face. While I knew she liked Austin, even loved him as a son, she was after all still a mother, so the idea of Austin and I together intimately before being married bothered her. I understood my mother’s denial of Austin’s and my physical relationship was necessary for her sanity. It was however more than difficult for my sanity. I hated the idea of Austin leaving, staying with his parents. This would definitely be a long three days.
I secured my arms around Austin’s neck and blatantly nuzzled my nose into the collar of his coat. I took in deep breaths of his cologne, committing it to my memory. The smell of his skin, the soap he used, all mixed in to a luscious scent which I love. I felt Austin undo the knot on the back of my hair, setting it free, brushing his fingers through it. He heaved a sigh before he enveloped me with his arms tightly around my waist.
“Sleep well, my love. I will see you in a few hours, so please try to get some rest, Winter.”
“I love you. Sorry about the boob question,” I whispered into his ear, knowing it could have been worse.
Austin kissed the top of my head. “I love you too, baby.” He placed his mouth to my ear. “I answered honestly. I just left out the part where I confessed how much I love your totally real, tempting, completely lovely ladies.”
I giggled. After one last nuzzle to my neck, Austin turned the full force of his smile on my mother. She actually blushed.
“Goodnight, Cynthia.”
“Goodnight, Austin,” she replied.
I watched Austin go and hated it, but I took in a deep breath, turned around, and dragged my luggage to our room. All I could think about was how ridiculous things were. To have Austin leave our own home struck me as more than silly. And I will admit, I pondered how long the rest of the night, or actually morning, would be. An epic restless night was ahead of me, I was sure.
I took my time unpacking, rearranging my sweaters in the dresser drawer. As it turned out, the couple of sweaters I had packed were not necessary in California. I pulled my tank top out of the suitcase, missing the panties. They being destroyed in a fit of passion. The thought of how my panties came to be gave me a sense of sinful pleasure. I threw my dirty clothes in the hamper then proceeded to place the tank top onto the top of the hamper pile.
I decided to take a hot bath. I turned on the water, adjusting the chrome knobs, allowing the water to flow into the tub with force. Quickly, I placed the stopper into the drain and in a few moments steam billowed throughout the room. I was already wondering what Austin was doing when I grabbed the bubble bath bottle and dumped a cap full of the liquid into the water.
It didn’t take long until the soap turned beneath the current in the water. Soon it made large frothy bubbles. While this was a tempting diversion, I still could not get Austin off of my mind. I wished he were here with me, but I decided since he wasn’t I would try an experiment. I would use this time as a precursory training for the time he would be away when filming. I needed to find a way to deal with Austin’s filming schedule. I had to find a way to deal. I turned the water off.
As I disrobed, I watched a distorted smudge of myself move within the steamed mirror. The blur lit a couple of candles which sat on the corner edge of the tub then moved toward the vanity. It turned on the radio, stretched over and hit the wall switch to dim the lights and vanished when I slipped down into the warm bath. But no matter how hard I tried to distract myself, my every thought was about Austin and the wedding.
Once I was submerged the tense muscles in my shoulders relaxed. When the water cooled some, I sunk deeper and allowed my head to go under. I lay silent beneath the warmth, enveloped, but I could see the piercing blue-gray of Austin’s eyes behind my closed eyelids. I popped my head back to the surface. I knew I was already losing the battle with finding a way to deal with his absence. Reality of a tickling sensation hit me as the water rolled down my face and over my mouth. I ran my hands through my hair brushing it back from my face, feeling droplets of water fall from my earlobes and plop like raindrops upon my neck and shoulders. Warm fingers rested softly upon my lips. My eyes popped open.
“Austin!” I almost shrilled.
“Shh.” He hushed me. His index finger was firm upon my half open lips. “I’m not supposed to be here, remember?”
I closed my lips, kissed his finger, and nodded my head. Austin removed his finger, bent down, and placed one arm under my knees and one arm beneath my shoulder blades. He lifted me up and out of the soapy water. He held me to his chest. I was soaking wet and dripping, but he cradled me in his arms.
“You are getting wet,” I said with a low giggle.
He shrugged. “It’s just water. Anyway, I have you in my arms right where I want you. I will never let you go.” He smiled, allowing his lips to mold to mine. Our teeth clattered together as we laughed and kissed.
I woke to the sound of Austin’s velvet voice in my ear. “Winter, baby I better go before your mom wakes up.”
I had spent the remainder of the morning wrapped in Austin’s arms, secure, warm, and totally at peace.
“Thank you,” I whispered, turning to look at him.
“For what?”
“For staying with me.”
Austin brushed his fingers over my lips. He tapped the tip of my nose with his thumb. “I will always stay with you.” His eyes shot to my not fake boobs. “I better get out of here before I do something to get us both in trouble.”
I reached out toward him. “Babe, I’ll see you at your parent’s house. We have to go over the seating chart with your mother today.”
He leaned in and kissed me tenderly. “I love you,” he said followed by a well-placed hand. He definitely copped a feel.
“Hey.” I protested, but not very hard.
“Nice,” he said quite pleased before I watched him sneak out in stealth.
Chapter Twelve
THE CARLYLE’S
When my mother and I arrived at the Carlyle home, I wanted to jump for joy when Austin came down the stairs to greet us. I wondered if I would ever get used to seeing him. Every time I looked at him was like the first time. He made my heart and my stomach do flips. He rushed down the last few stairs to take me into his arms. My feet dangled, not touching the ground.
“I missed you.” Austin whispered into my ear.
“Me too,” I replied.
Mrs. Carlyle called out, “Hello Cynthia, Winter. Welcome!”
Austin put me down, but still kept a hold of my hand firmly.
“Hello, Dr. Carlyle,” my mother returned.
Mrs. Carlyle’s face beamed. “Please call me Judith. Doctor Carlyle is my husband. Two doctors in the same household can be daunting.” Judith laughed a musical laugh.
Austin’s mother was a psychiatrist who gained notoriety after she wrote a book, Love Yourself, which dealt with body dysmorphic disorder. His father was a prominent heart surgeon, and the head of the cardiac unit at Mount Sinai Hospital.
“Where is your husband?” my mother inquired. “I hope our chatter doesn’t bother him.”
Judith waved her hand. “Now, don’t worry about Wells. I’m sure he is in his study, probably taking a nap.”
My mother and my future mother-in-law were getting along quite well. They seemed to really enjoy all the preparation and planning sessions. As they walked off, I could hear them talking about the napkins before they started clucking about the center pieces for the reception tables which had arrived. Of course, they assured each other they would need to look everything over before sending them off to their final destination.
“Winter dear, where is your father?”
That is Doctor Carlyle’s voice, I realized. I turned to see him walking toward me. I smiled rather apologetically and realized I had not answered him. “Oh, um…he decided to stay back at the apartment. There was a game he wanted to watch.”
My father never had much to do with me after he left my mother. I tried to visit with him from time to time, but it was never quite right, never really comfortable. Whatever woman he was with at the time did not want me around. I quickly understood I was the third wheel. When I was fifteen, he married again. Pretty much whatever sketchy relationship we did have, was over. The fact my father had actually decided to make his presence known by coming to New York was somewhat surprising. I was beginning to believe the only reason he had come was to irritate my mother. He was as usual not interested in spending time with me or getting to know Austin or Austin’s parents.
“Well then, will you two join me?” Doctor Carlyle asked.
Doctor Carlyle took a hold of my arm, Austin followed beside. We went into the sitting room, the sun showing bright over the pale blue furniture. I was always a little uncomfortable sitting in this room, afraid I would break something or get it dirty somehow and ruin the picture perfect space. It was like something one would see on the cover of Home and Garden magazine. Everything crisp white with pale blue accents. Antiques filled the space, including gilt framed artwork of old English landscapes. Yards of silken white and blue toile patterned curtains covered all the windows in an elaborate arrangement, which seemed to start at the high carved ceiling and flow to the floor in small organized puddles of perfection.
Austin and I took a seat on the long brocade covered couch. Doctor Carlyle took a seat in the tall high-backed armchair. Doctor Carlyle had a quiet confidence about him. This is where Austin gained his quiet confidence I was sure.
“I wanted to tell you how happy I am to have you as part of our family, Winter. I know we do not get the chance to talk much, but I must tell you, my son loves you more than life. You are the sun shining light in his world.”
I smiled. Austin was my shining sun.
“The evening Austin first met you, he called me. Did you know that?”
I turned, looked at Austin, my expression had to be one of surprise. His expression was tender, soft. Austin took a hold of my hand and pulled it onto his thigh. He intertwined his fingers tightly with mine.
“No. I did not know that,” I replied, returning my attention back to Doctor Carlyle.
“Well he did.” Doctor Carlyle took in a breath then exhaled. “Austin might not wish me to tell you this story, but I want to tell you.”
The Doctor smiled. He was gazing at me with such affection I felt a twinge of real love for him. Then Doctor Carlyle crossed his feet, leaned rather casually back in his chair, and proceeded with his story.
“My son called me, his voice shaking. I immediately asked him what was wrong. I was worried, but then I heard Austin laugh.”
“‘No dad nothing is wrong,’ he said to me.
“‘It’s late son.”
“‘I know, but I just had to tell you I met the most beautiful girl. She is perfect but she doesn’t have any idea just how perfect or how beautiful she really is. Her name is Winter Perri. She is from a small town in Colorado. She’s a sophomore, attending the university here on a journalism scholarship. I know this sounds crazy dad, but I am in love. She doesn’t know me yet so she can’t know this, but I am going to marry her. She is the one, my Winter.’”
My eyes welled up with tears as Doctor Carlyle spoke. It was the same for Austin as it was for me. He loved me and wanted me the instant our eyes met.
“Austin,” I said softly, astonished. He swiped my cheek with the back of his hand which was still intertwined with mine.
“So you see.” Doctor Carlyle continued in his low quiet tone. “I became acquainted with you, and how much my son loved you before I ever met you. When he finally brought you home for Christmas I knew he was right. I have watched you two over the years. I am glad to see this time has come. You two will have a wonderful life together. I recognize how much you love each other. It is your bond, your unwavering love which will get you through anything life can throw at you.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. A tear fell down my cheek. Austin’s finger found it, wiping it away.
“So now you know,” Austin said softly. He was looking at me from beneath those dark thick lashes, burning me with those molten blue eyes. “You altered my existence the first time I met you. There is nothing, not Hollywood, not fame, not money, no other woman, no matter how blond.” He smiled his crooked smile at me. “There is nothing but you for me, my love. I can never let you go. There has never been anything but you, and there can never be anyone but you. You have always been my Winter, and you will always be mine. We are forever.”
Judith’s voice broke through the exaltation in my mind and in my heart. “What are you all talking about in here?”
“Just welcoming Winter to the family, dear,” Doctor Carlyle answered.
Judith walked over toward us with my mother following close behind. Judith’s deep blue eyes seemed to be giving her husband a “we don’t have time for distractions” glare.
“Well, dear,” Judith said, “you will need to let them go. We do have important things to accomplish today. The seating chart is a must.”
Doctor Carlyle winked at his wife. She grabbed at the pearls around her neck seeming to blush.
“Yes, dear, the seating chart.” Judith reiterated with a coy smile.
Austin groaned. “The seating chart, not again. We have discussed the seating chart twice. Who cares where people sit.”
Judith snapped her foot while admonishing her son with “Austin!”
“I know, Mother. We are coming. I can see how the seating chart is a matter of life and death.” He chuckled as he took my hand, “Come on, baby,” he said. “The seating chart awaits.”
“Be nice,” I mouthed to Austin. He smiled his guilty crooked smile then winked at me.
After dinner it was time to leave. I again felt a sense of pain with the knowledge I would leave Austin with his parents. I, however,
would be going with my mother back to the apartment to more than likely argue with my father until one of them threw their hands up, slamming doors behind them.
I felt better once he took me into his arms, kissed me, this time not so carefully then whispered into my ear, “I’ll be over when your mother goes to sleep.”
I smiled wide at this information then smoothed out my face. “Goodnight,” I said. “I will see you tomorrow.”
“Goodnight,” Austin returned.
Epilogue
I knew the exact moment Austin slid in beneath the sheets. He tucked his glorious body up beside me. I glanced at the clock. It was midnight. He secured his arms around me. My back was pressed up against his chest. I breathed, really breathed now he was with me. Austin’s mouth found my neck. He kissed it with a nibble then ran his hand down my side, over my hip, then over my waist. He lifted the bottom of my shirt, well, all right, his shirt really. I was wearing one of his dress shirts to bed. I could feel his fingers brush over my skin. He was making small circular motions while they moved down past my navel inching lower. I shivered.
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too, Austin.”
“Mmm.” He murmured against my neck. “That’s a good thing.”
I giggled. “It’s a good thing that I love you or that your finger is finding my—” I gasped. “Oh, um, that’s, so—”
“Say it.”
“Touching me, that’s—”
“Tell me, baby. I want to hear you tell me.” His persuasive finger circled my desire, urging my hips to shoot forward. “Tell me,” he said.
“It’s good when you touch me.”
“When I touch what?” he asked, all the while rubbing the pert tip between my female folds.
“Um.” I seemed to mutter. “My.” My breath hitched. His fingers worked magic.
“I want to hear the words, Winter.”
“My clit babe, when you touch my….” I lost my words as he knew I would while using that busy digit well.
“Really?” he asked, as if he didn’t know. “I assure you I like touching you like this.” He twirled his finger around my desire. “And like this.” Austin slid his digit back and forth, slowly driving me crazy. “And like this.” He tweaked my desire. Circled it.
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