Allowed. He cursed and buried his head in his hands, hoping his stupid, overly-religious father was long dead and gone from the Earth.
His door opened and he blinked as light fell across the bed. Lucas’s big frame was a silhouette before he came into the room and crawled onto the bed. He sat back against the headboard and pulled Snow into his arms. He hadn’t bothered to put on a shirt with his pajama pants and his skin felt overly hot—probably because he’d been plastered to Andrei.
“I’m not surprised you had one of your nightmares.” Lucas’s voice was quiet in the darkness of the room. “I should have just pulled you into my bed for the night.”
“I’m sure that would have gone over well with your boyfriend,” Snow muttered.
Lucas grunted. “Like you’d turn down a chance to snuggle with him.”
“Probably not.” Snow sat up again, feeling faintly ashamed that he’d needed the hug so badly and embarrassed that Andrei had surely heard him screaming. He could only hope the one that woke him had been the only one. “You don’t have to stay in here. I’m fine. This isn’t the first time and it certainly won’t be the last, so I’m used to it.”
“Shut up. Nobody grows used to nightmares, not if it’s the one you told me about before.” Lucas pulled him back so that Snow’s head was resting on his wide chest, the steady beat of his heart pounding under his ear. Snow wrapped his arms around Lucas’s waist and let himself sink into his friend’s warmth. Fingers threaded through his hair over and over, rubbing across his scalp and temple in a familiar caress that helped to fight back the last dark tendrils of the nightmare. “Was it the same dream?”
“Yeah. Only this time my mother turned into that guy in my house. There was even the same blood spatter on the wall over her bed.” Snow shuddered, his arms tightening for a moment. He said nothing about the man turning into Jude because the horror of that part of the dream hovered over his heart like a hungry black hole.
“Shit.” Lucas wrapped his arms around Snow, holding him tight as if he could absorb him into his own body for protection.
The nightmare had changed over the years, the first version coming before he entered medical school, before the Army even. Lucas had first witnessed it during a sleepover at his house when Snow had screamed the house down from the twin bed across his room. Then, just as he did now, Lucas had crawled under his covers and held him. The soft cotton of Lucas’s pajamas rubbing against his feet even felt the same, putting him back in that same cocoon of safety that only Lucas had ever been able to create for him. Damn man thought he could fix anything and everything.
What made Snow stop and think was the knowledge that already, Jude was proving to be someone he could feel safe with.
“Was the smell in this dream?” Lucas asked.
“It always is,” Snow said slowly. “And it always sticks around like it actually gets into my nose. I’m sorry you know what I’m talking about.”
“I’m not. It helps me understand what you go through in a small way.” He laid his cheek on top of Snow’s head. “I was in that house with you once when she was still alive. That…odor…stays in the memories. I’m so sorry it won’t leave yours.”
“Luckily you didn’t live with it for most of a year.” Sighing heavily, Snow sat up and placed his palm on Lucas’s hard thigh. “I do appreciate you charging to my rescue like always, but I really will be okay. I’m exhausted, so I should fall back to sleep fast.” He pushed Lucas toward the edge of the bed. “Go back to your man. That’s where you should be now.”
“Lie down, Ash,” Lucas said, shoving him in return. Lucas kept pushing until Snow finally turned over on his side and lay down under the blankets. Lucas followed him down, settling the blankets over both of them before pulling Snow’s back against his chest. “This is where I need to be right now. I’ll just stay until you fall asleep.”
Snow closed his eyes, knowing it was pointless to argue after so many years. He soaked in the feel of Lucas’s arm wrapped around him, his steady breathing lulling him back toward sleep. And yet a thought was still nagging at him.
“Why haven’t you told Andrei about your past?”
With their bodies pressed so close, there was no missing the way Lucas’s muscles tensed at his question. He started to pull away, but Snow grabbed his wrist holding him in place.
“No offense. Your childhood was bad, but not half as shitty as mine. What’s going on?” Snow pressed.
“Our lives were so tangled up when we were kids,” Lucas started, his voice barely more than a shaky whisper.
“Still are.”
Lucas huffed a weak laugh. “True.”
“But…”
“There’s so much that I can’t tell him, because I’ll have to tell him things about your past.”
Snow closed his eyes. Fucking Lucas. Still protecting him, even from the man he was completely lost in. “What does he know about you?”
“My past?” Lucas paused, the silence stretching so long that Snow had begun to wonder if Lucas had fallen asleep. “That I’m not from Cincinnati and that we lived in Baltimore with Rowe while you were going to medical school.”
A groan rose in Snow’s throat but he swallowed it down. “Ian?”
“No. He knows there’s something in our past regarding Ian because all that’s happened with Gratton, but he doesn’t know all the specifics.”
“Geez, Vallois.”
“I’m fucking this up, aren’t I?” he asked in a weary voice.
“Yeah, big time. You’ve met the man’s parents. Hell, we all had Thanksgiving with them. He’s made big changes for you. You’ve got to give him something. Even I know you’ve got to prove that you’re in this thing with him too.”
Lucas groaned softly, dropping his head to Snow’s shoulder.
“Do you trust him?” Snow pressed when Lucas didn’t speak.
“Of course.”
“Then tell him. You have my permission. Tell him anything and everything.”
Lucas tightened his arm around Snow’s chest. “Thank you.”
“Now go to sleep or go back to the man in your bed.”
“No matter what man I have in my bed, you are always going to be important.”
“I know that,” Snow whispered before he chuckled. “But let’s not pretend that any other man is ever going to be in your bed.”
“I hope you’re right.”
Lucas’s comfort helped Snow drift off again, but a part of him wished it was Jude in his bed. Worry gnawed at him. He’d dragged Jude into the darker side of his life and it was just possible that what he’d see tomorrow night would be enough to push him away for good.
Chapter 15
Jude closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath through his nose, holding it for a five count before pushing the air out through clenched teeth. His heart was still pounding crazily in his chest, but he didn’t feel as if he was going to throw up all over the incredibly expensive suit he’d borrowed from Andrei. The bodyguard was the closest to his own height, but apparently Jude was a little broader in the shoulders and a little thicker in the waist. Maybe a sign to pass on seconds at Mana’s. Hell, if he lived through this, he’d start taking his trips to the gym a lot more seriously again and possibly even ask Andrei for some fighting tips if he was going to continue to see Snow.
Street lights flashed by his window and a low hum echoed as the black town car glided over the Suspension Bridge, slipping across the Ohio River and into the heart of downtown Cincinnati from Lucas’s penthouse. It was late, nearly midnight, and traffic was sparse for a Thursday night. They were heading for Music Hall, which simply flabbergasted Jude. How could such a horrendous event take place as such a well-known venue? But sometimes the best place to hide was out in the open. And if you had enough money, who the hell was going to call you on it?
Truthfully, after Jude had found out where the auction was supposed to take place, his brain had shut down. Watching Lucas and Andrei carefully lay out their plan had
left him stunned. He’d mentioned contacting the cops once and only once. Even Snow had looked at him like he’d lost his mind.
Of course, seeing the general in action was enough to make him hard as they sat there in Lucas’s living room. Cool, precise, and controlled, Jude could only imagine the surgeon looked exactly like that in the operating room. It wasn’t hard to see that Snow and Lucas had a long history together. When in planning mode, the two men were finishing each other’s sentences and talking almost in code, referencing past exploits. Jude had caught Andrei’s eye, and the other man just shrugged and smiled as if he were accustomed to their behavior.
Thank God for Andrei. He was the only thing keeping him from feeling utterly out of place when both Lucas and Snow were in the same room together. He was sure the feeling would be worse if Snow’s other close friends had been there. But Andrei was always calm and relaxed as if the man was tapped into some secret Zen pool of peace. Sure, Lucas was calm, but his calm appeared as if he were corralling all the forces of nature, bending them to his will so that energy cracked in the air around him. And Snow…well Snow always looked as if he were half a step from snarling, but he liked that about the doctor.
“Jude.”
He looked up to meet Andrei’s gaze in the rearview mirror. The bodyguard’s seemingly ever-present smile was missing now. He’d had turned coldly serious the second they’d stepped into the elevator to head down to the garage.
“You’ve got this.” Andrei held Jude’s eyes for a second longer before turning his attention back to the road. “Lucas would never have asked you if he thought you couldn’t handle this.”
“What about me?” Geoffrey demanded, sliding to the edge of the leather seat. His delicate hands and long fingers wrapped around the passenger seat headrest. The small, slender man had barely sat still since entering Lucas’s home and being in a car certainly wasn’t slowing down his fidgeting.
Jude couldn’t see Andrei’s expression, but there was no missing the tension that seemed to straighten his shoulders just a little more. “You listen to Jude. Do exactly what he says.”
“Huh.” Geoffrey flopped back in his seat and frowned at Jude, but it had lost some of the venom that had been present earlier.
He appeared to be struggling to forgive Jude for stealing Snow away. And Snow was most definitely his. The young-looking blond might not be Snow’s type, but Jude was happy to lock horns with anyone who thought they might have a shot at the doctor. Jude found himself wanting everything the general had to offer, even his crankiness. Or maybe especially his crankiness because that meant Jude had the pleasure of bringing a smile to his lips. And a moan.
“It’s serious, isn’t it?” Geoffrey demanded, pulling Jude back to the car. “This thing with Snow. It’s serious.”
“Yeah.” Jude felt heavy words beating against the back of his teeth, fighting to get out, but he swallowed them down. He’d never used those words with anyone he dated, hadn’t even thought about using them, but everything with Snow was different. With Snow, he was willing to risk it all. “Yeah, it’s serious.”
But even saying just that, he was grateful the mics and micro video camera hadn’t been turned on yet. He didn’t want to think about what Snow’s reaction might be to his words.
“Damn it! It’s just not fair. He’s so hot,” Geoffrey groaned. He slouched low, glaring at the seat in front of him.
“You’ll find someone.”
“As hot as Snow?” Geoffrey snorted. He plucked at the cuff of his shiny silk shirt, pulling the sleeve back in place. “Not likely.”
Okay. Geoffrey had him there. “You’ll find someone,” Jude repeated, ignoring the tell-tale laughter in Andrei’s eyes when he met the other man’s gaze in the rearview mirror. Fuck. He had it so bad for the general.
“I—” Andrei started to say something and then stopped, lifting his right hand to touch the ear piece hidden under his hair. Jude’s stomach dropped and he sat up a little straighter. Holy shit! Were the mics on?
“Snow and Lucas are parked over on Race, directly across from the building, but the view is partially blocked by the park,” Andrei explained. There was a soft creaking under his words as he tightened his hands on the steering wheel. “We’ll be parking at the lot near the temple on Elm. It’ll put us a block down from Music Hall.”
“The Washington parking lot is really nice and it’s across the street from Music Hall,” Geoffrey suggested.
“And it’s underground,” Andrei grumbled. “Only two ways out. If we encounter trouble tonight, I don’t want to be stuck underground with only two exits. Stick with the plan. If you are running out, cut through the park. If you don’t see Lucas or Snow on Race, keep going to Vine and find other people. Disappear into a bar and call the cops.”
Jude glanced over at Geoffrey, who looked considerably paler in the thin light flashing from the street lamps. His shoulders hunched, he shrank into himself, looking much younger than his late twenties.
“We’ll get through this.”
Geoffrey directed a disbelieving look at him, but some of the tension relaxed from his thin shoulders. “Really? Had a lot of experience dealing with bastards who buy sex slaves that look like little boys, Torres?”
“Nope,” Jude said, grinning at Geoffrey’s surprising sarcasm. “But do you think Lucas Vallois would let his boyfriend walk into this place if he couldn’t protect us and himself?” Jude paused, letting the weight of Lucas’s name just sit on Geoffrey for a moment. While in Lucas’s living room, Lucas had been the only one who could get Geoffrey to sit still and listen to their proposal. “Do you really think Lucas and Snow would just abandon us to these fuckers?”
“No,” Geoffrey said in a huff. He glared at Jude a second then rolled his eyes dramatically. “Just stop, okay? I really don’t want to like you and I definitely haven’t forgiven you for taking Snow. I so found him first.”
Jude chuckled but the sound was cut off when he felt the car slowing and turning into the dimly lit lot. It was time. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a choker studded with gems along with a hidden micro video camera and mic.
A sly, wicked grin spread Geoffrey’s lips and Jude couldn’t stop the flush that reached his cheeks. “Well, at least you give me pretty gifts,” Geoffrey said, taking the choker and lifting it to his slender throat.
“Do you need help?”
Geoffrey arched on blond brow as if to say he had plenty of experience putting on a choker, making Jude instantly feel like an idiot. Apparently he wasn’t the only one because he caught Andrei’s laugh before he could cover it with a cough. When Geoffrey had the choker secured, he looked over at Andrei. “Is it working properly? Can they see and hear?”
Andrei paused, his body stiff before he finally gave a nod. “It’s working fine.”
A giggle slipped from Geoffrey and he reclined back in his seat. “This thing could be so much fun. Can you imagine the videos we could take?” he said, his usually quick speech slowed to a soft purr. “Snow stretched out above me, all those beautiful muscles moving as he pounds my ass. The sounds he must make would be music.”
Jude opened his mouth to snap at Geoffrey but Andrei beat him to it. “Lucas says stop it and concentrate on the job. Snow doesn’t have an earpiece and Lucas doesn’t want to hear about Snow’s sex life right now.”
Geoffrey grinned back at Andrei and shrugged. “Lucas is sexy too. I bet he—”
Andrei immediately turned in his seat and pointed at Geoffrey. “Stop.” The young man smiled but closed his mouth.
They all got out of the car. A brisk winter wind rushed through the city to greet them, pulling at their clothes with icy fingers. Geoffrey shivered, wrapping his arms around his waist. He was the most lightly dressed of the trio in skin-tight leather pants and a thin, pale blue silk shirt. Jude had tried to get him to take a winter coat, but he’d argued that it would mess with his sex kitten vibe. No one else argued with Geoffrey so Jude let it drop.
He led th
e way down the empty street. Unless there was an event at Music Hall, like an opera, Elm was quiet in the evenings. All the hot restaurants and bars were a couple blocks east, starting on Vine. And what did it matter if the rich men of Cincinnati were being dropped off in front of Music Hall in the evening? It was just another charitable event raising money for one good deed or another.
He’d never had the chance to step in Music Hall before—trips to see the symphony or opera or even the ballet when they’d performed at Music Hall rather than Aronoff were not part of his normal routine—and now this place would be forever stained in his mind with this memory.
“Head up. Shoulders back. Spine straight,” Andrei bit out low and sharp from behind him. Jude glanced over his shoulder at Andrei, but the bodyguard’s eyes were sweeping over their surroundings, searching for hidden dangers. “These people are beneath your notice. Tonight, you own him and you own me. You can buy and sell the world. Now act like it.”
“You mean act like your boyfriend,” Jude teased.
Andrei didn’t react, his face a blank slate as he stared straight ahead. “If you can pull off just a tenth of his arrogance, these people will welcome you like their long-lost son.”
Jude had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling as he turned his attention forward and followed Andrei’s advice. He had no doubt that Lucas, and possibly Snow, heard that entire conversation. There was going to be hell to pay later and Jude had a feeling that Andrei was looking forward to every second of it. Someone like Lucas would need a little needling and Andrei appeared more than happy to provide it.
Cincinnati Music Hall suddenly rose up before them, as the enormous red-brick building took up almost an entire city block. Built more than a century ago, it was once the center of the city’s music scene, but as new venues popped up, Music Hall nearly dropped into obscurity, relegated to the world of old money and overdone wedding pictures. But the revival of nearby Over-the-Rhine and Washington Park had put Music Hall back in the center of events.
Shatter (Unbreakable Bonds Series Book 2) Page 17