He threw his hands up in surrender to respect my wishes.
Finally, he’s respecting my wishes. Thank you.
Our erratic breaths and pounding heartbeats returned to normal. Then, I took a step forward and looked up at him. I stared into his hazel eyes for understanding. Did he just make the wrong judgement call with not telling me about Justine, or was he being deceptive? Answers to these questions would help me decide whether I could trust Jacob again. Lord knows, I wanted to.
I rested a hand on his blazer and sighed helplessly.
Jacob took that as a sign that I was too stubborn to say what I needed. His lips came crashing down onto mine. We stood in the kitchen making out until my mind clouded in anticipation of otherworldly ecstasy. Maybe I did need to slip away from my miseries—again. If only for the duration of the fall.
He kissed me all the way from the kitchen to my bedroom. We fell onto the bed as his hands caressed my breasts. I moaned my pleasure and wrapped my arms around his neck tightly. I was making a mistake that would confuse us both, but he was my husband and I craved to feel something other than the contempt that consumed me for the past three weeks.
Jacob quickly discarded my clothing and his. Our naked bodies pressed together with intense desire to fuse. The dance between our tongues continued. His tongue would slide against mine and a shiver would run down my spine. My tongue would cuddle his and he would groan in delight. I ached for the moment our bodies became one.
“I will always be here for you and my baby,” Jacob said as he ran his hand over my slight baby bump. “There’s only me, you and our children. She is a nonfactor to me. Do you understand me?”
I didn’t answer. The heartache caused by him bringing her up must have shown.
He plowed into my tender flesh, ripping me open for him.
"Just me and you, Destiny," he said, grazing his lips across mine.
"Jacob," I moaned against his lips.
He made love to me staring into my soul, speaking to me in ways he could never express out loud. My lower lips gripped his rod as he entered and exited with loving, yet forceful strokes.
After intense lovemaking, he crashed down on top of me. His hot seed gushed against my contracting vaginal walls. We lay gazing into each other’s eyes, seeing past the flesh and into untold, metaphysical places I could only imagine sharing with him.
Chapter Ten
Destiny
“Girl, my poetry friends are still buzzing about your piece. They want to know when you’re coming back to spit for open mic.”
“Honey, that was over a month ago. There is no way they are still talking about that poem,” I said, smiling and feeling good that something I made up on a whim was still relevant in Tasha’s poetry circle. I imagined if I put my mind to it I could create something even better.
“Sis, don’t downplay your talent. What you spat was nice for it to be unrehearsed. Some poets have been going in there for years and can’t do a piece with that much boldness that holds people’s interest,” Tasha said. “And where have you been? I’ve been trying to call you for the last week?”
I had been back in Atlanta for a little over a month. Tasha and I talked every day for the first week, but since Jacob went to Utah, I had been using that time to get my house back in order—something he was very much against and spent many hours of each day distracting me from when he was in Atlanta.
“Girl, I’ve been getting this house together,” I said.
“Oh, yeah? I forgot Jacob has been doing everything to keep you from fixing up that house. I know he hates that he had an emergency in Utah,” she said.
“Yeah, I’ve had three peaceful weeks with him gone. Every day, he sends me a text adding to the list of things he wants us to do when he returns. He wants to go to Germany to see this baby specialist or to California to see that one, and to do water aerobics because it’s good for the baby. He’s using our baby to stay close to me. He acts like none of this Justine mess ever happened. He’s trying to take up as much of my time as—”
“You let him,” Tasha finished my sentence not quite the way I would have.
“I guess.”
“Thank God he’s out of town. I haven’t had to worry about him hovering over me, calling every five minutes, hand delivering insane amounts of flowers, or camping out on my porch refusing to leave until I talk to him,” I said omitting that I gave in to him the morning before he left town.
“Whatever is going on in Utah must be terribly important for him to still be there.”
“The Utah office is in crisis. He had to fire the director because he was accused of sexual misconduct and Turner is being sued.”
“I knew it had to be something on that scale. That man is determined to get you back. And I can’t say I blame him. You come from a good stock of people,” Tasha gloated.
“Yeah, well, I don’t see that happening.” I sighed. “We’re more than likely finished.”
“You love him, Destiny. I can hear it in your voice whenever we talk about him. What he did makes me mad as hell whenever I think about it, but I also know he loves you. I could see that in his eyes when I pulled out of his driveway with you and the kids in the car.”
“Well, love doesn’t keep everything together. Honesty and loyalty are just as important. And, before you go in on me, I know I did my dirt, but I had not accepted his marriage proposal and I wasn’t planning for a wedding while screwing Montie. I think that’s a big difference, along with the fact that I came clean with him. I put all my cards on the table and let him have the choice of whether he wanted to play the hand,” I argued.
“And he chose you.”
“I guess he chose us both since he was still with her and we’re both pregnant at the same time.”
“Awe, Desi. I’m torn. You know I was against him in the beginning because I thought he was just a rich, white prick that wanted to take advantage of you. However, I came to like him and think his love for you is genuine. Jacob has really got me messed up with this.”
“If you’re messed up, then you know I’m destroyed. So, I guess the question is am I going to sit on the phone and mope about him all night or do we have something uplifting to talk about?” I asked and giggled nervously.
“Do you need me to come to Atlanta and keep you company and help you organize your house? You shouldn’t be lifting or moving heavy furniture. Wait, please tell me you’re not doing trying to move that furniture around on your own, Ms. Superwoman.”
“Oh no, Montie has been helping me a lot.”
“Montie?” she asked. I could imagine the questions running through her mind.
“Montie and his girlfriend, Lissa, were nice enough to offer me a hand. Montie got one of his frat brothers to move the big furniture with him, while Lissa helped me clean and reorganize the kid’s room. This house was a dusty mess, but it’s looking good now.”
“Hold on,” Tasha said and the line went silent. “I’m back. I had to go pinch myself. Did you just say Montie and his girlfriend helped you move?”
“Yeah, and the kids are gone with them now to give me time to relax, but I’m up working instead.”
“You’ve got to be shitting me. Montie…and his girlfriend…at your house?”
“You’re a mess, Tasha. I’m not entertaining you either.”
“I’m just saying. How did that work out with the three of you being there at once? The last time I saw Montie it was written all over his face that he was still in love with you.”
“Well, I like Lissa, so everything was cool with her being here. Montie has fallen head over tail in love with her, and that’s the only thing that shows on his face when she is around,” I said.
“He must really like her to bring her around you. Not too long ago, his nostrils were wide open sniffing for your scent,” she said in a high-pitched tone. “Now, he’s bringing his new girl around. I don’t know whether to be happy for him or be ticked.”
“Tasha, be happy for the man. I am. But I
can’t lie, at first, I was a little bruised when I saw them together, and how much she looked like me, and how he couldn’t keep his hands off her. What could I say, though? I remarried and asked him to be a part of making my marriage work by letting the kids move to Miami. He was willing to try for me, so I’m doing the same for him. Besides, it’s hard for me to feel anything about Montie being with Lissa but happiness for them both. She told me about the men who hurt her in the past and how she’s blessed to have Montie. At least they are in love, and I’m happy for them.”
“I get it, you’re happy for them. What about you and Jacob though? Maybe your love story doesn’t have to end where it is. If it does, Justine gets what she wanted all along.”
“Tasha, give me a break with the Jacob hypothesizing. What’s done is done cannot be undone, no matter what Justine tried to do, or how bad I want him.”
“Listen, let me just tell you that I thought his story about Justine sneaking sex from him sounded like fuckery off the top, but the more I remember the night Miami went black I think it’s damn sure possible.”
“Oh, so it appears that you’ve drank of the Jacob Kool-Aid. You think she snuck into our house, went up into our room, slipped into my pajamas, sprayed on some of my perfume, went into his study where he was sleeping, and screwed him until she was pregnant with his seed, all without him knowing until the deed was done? At no point from the time he entered her body to the time he impregnated her did he realize it was her, and not me,” I repeated the ignoramus story bitingly.
“It’s possible,” Tasha said in a low tone as if she was attempting to make herself believe the bogusness. “I mean wait, I’m not taking up for him, but I’m a hard sleeper. A burglar could sneak off with me in his arms and I wouldn’t realize I wasn’t in my bed unless my alarm went off in my pajama pocket, and I still might not wake up then.”
“Don’t overanalyze for him, Tasha. This happened weeks before we got married. If he she tricked him, and he knew she tricked him, he had ample time to tell me about it. That way, I could have dusted her off for sneaking in my house and messing with my man. But did he do that? No. He just kept the secret and our whimsical insta-love fantasy lived on like nothing happened.” I repeated the excruciating memories that prohibited me from giving my heart back to Jacob completely. Those reminders replayed in my mind everyday like a sad, old-school music video where the girl with a big heart falls deep in love and gets played.
“Jacob should have told you what happened. I’m not trying to defend that point, but I can’t help but feel he got duped. He’s not that stupid to sleep with Justine. He’s always shown her contempt and you love. It just doesn’t add up.”
“That’s what I’ve been saying all along, but it’s the truth cousin. I just have to live with it. That’s why I’m fixing my house back up—if that gives you indication of how close Jacob is to getting me back,” I said as I dropped a laundry basket down on my bed and began folding my clothes and putting them into the drawers. “Enough about me and my woes. Tell me what’s going on with you. Are you still babysitting for that sexy boss of yours, Matt?” Tasha had sent me a picture of Matt to show me the man who was paying her enough money to buy a small community for babysitting his nephew.
“You know I’m still working for Matt. Why would I leave him? Girl, that man is going to need the sheriff to kick me out, and I’ll still be holding on to the doorpost as they try to push me out the door, screaming ‘no, don’t fire me!’”
I laughed harder than I had in a while, imaging Tasha acting up about having to leave Matt.
“I’ve made more money babysitting than I have writing or any other job that I have done in my life,” she continued.
“Why is it that when you talk about him I get this feeling that the money isn’t the only thing keeping you there?” I pressed.
“Huh?”
“Oh, now you’re dumbfounded,” I snickered. “You love to write and working for a high-profile magazine press is your dream job. You never even liked to be around kids before. Now, you’re the best sitter on this side of the map. What’s really going on?”
“That’s not true. I love Junior and Montana, and they are kids,” Tasha said. “As far as the rest of what you said, I plead the fifth.”
“You better plead, because I know how you are with kids, too. Junior and Montana are the first children I have ever seen you not use your three-feet rule on.”
“Yeah, well, maybe it was time for me to change that and let the little creatures in my space. I’ve found so much joy being around Cody; he’s one of the brightest and kindest little boys I know. He’s a lot like his uncle, too.”
“You never did tell me why Matt has custody of him.”
“His parents died in a plane crash, leaving Matt as his custodian. His nanny got deported back to Mexico earlier this year, so Matt needed a babysitter. My friend Dana told me that Matt was looking for a sitter and set me up to meet him, since I was looking for work. Cody and I clicked the first day I went over there, and we’ve gotten close since. It would kill me if I couldn’t be there with him. He’s become such a big part of my life in such a short time,” Tasha said in a sincere tone that melted my heart.
“Whoa, sounds like two men have stolen your heart,” I said.
“No, just Cody. Matt has his own life. That’s why he has me babysitting Cody so much, so he can go out on dates and do whatever he likes. Therefore, no matter how sexy he looks, I’m not falling for the games men like him play.”
“Well, I can’t say that’s a bad idea,” I said.
Jacob’s handsome face flashed through my mind and lingered for far too long. I wondered if I would ever think of being loved without images of his gorgeous smile tormenting my mind.
The ringing doorbell brought my attention back to the phone in my hand.
“Hold on, Tasha, someone is at the door,” I said as I strolled up the hallway.
I peeked through my peephole, and lo and behold the devil stood arrogantly on the other side.
“Why is he back in town already?” I mumbled.
“Who is it, Jacob?” Tasha asked.
“Yeah.” I blew out a loud huff. “He was supposed to be in Utah for another week.”
“I guess he couldn’t stay away from you that long. I’ll let you go talk to your husband, Destiny. And remember what I said earlier.”
“Oh, I will, but this won’t take long. I’ll call you right back.” Determined not to give in to him this time, I ended the call and spoke through the door. “What do you want, Jacob?”
“Let me in. I want to talk to you.”
“No, Jacob. I’m busy. Call me tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? I’m not waiting that long to see you. I’ve been gone three weeks already. Now, let me in, Destiny. It’s cold out here.”
Standing at the door listening to him would only cause me to crumble. I’d probably get lost in his relentless demands, open the door to hear his velvety voice full of promises to make things right, and fall six feet under his mind-numbing kiss, as I had done before. I still had a lot to figure out on my own.
Therefore, I walked toward my bedroom with light, slow steps to finish putting my clothes back in their rightful places. I was determined to rebuild my life the best way I knew how.
Chapter Eleven
Jacob
Ex to Ex
The Tables Have Turned
After standing at Destiny’s door knocking for the past ten minutes, I went back to my car and sat in the driver’s seat. I was tired of the back and forth. Before I went to Utah, she let me in and temporarily made me the happiest man alive. She gave me what I needed most, her unrestricted love. Other days, I was reduced to sitting in the car being her protector from the sidelines.
I didn’t stake out in front of her house because I was some jealous, obsessed husband. No. I did it because I didn’t want anything to happen to her that I could have prevented. I had an unmarked car watching her house when I wasn’t available to do it
myself. I had to know she, our baby, Junior and Montana were okay at all times.
Settling into my seat, I turned on the radio and Dylan Scott touted off about his girl. His song made me reflect on how I got to this place where Destiny didn’t consider herself my girl.
“Yeah, that's my girl. In my truck, in the songs that I sing with the radio up. My girl. In my heart, in my soul and the air that I breathe every day…”
I reached the bridge of “My Girl” and was in full country boy singing mode when Montie’s BMW pulled into my girl’s driveway. My stepchildren sprinted from the car to the door. Montana wore a pretty pink dress with a headful of pretty bows. Junior wore blue slacks and a blue and white button-down collar shirt.
I scrambled to get the door open, hopped out the car and jogged up to the door behind them. “Junior, Montana!” I screamed their names.
When they saw me, they ran over and leapt into my arms.
I snatched both of them up and hugged them tight. I didn’t want to let go. “I missed you guys so much,” I said after kissing the tops of their heads.
“I miss you too,” Montana said in her sweet, little voice.
“Hey Mr. Jacob,” Junior said. He was back to calling me Mr. Jacob instead of Pops. That let me down hard. At least, he was still speaking to me. “I’m about to go inside with my Mama,” he quickly added as he wiggled out of my embrace.
I watched Junior run up the lawn and to the front door. Montana stayed in my arms with her head rested on my chest. I rested my jaw on top of her head, cherishing our time together. I didn’t know if Destiny would come outside and snatch her away from me or if she would allow us time to catch up. She’d been unpredictable for the past month.
“Hey Jacob, man, I didn’t know you would be here. Does Destiny know you’re out here?” Montie asked as worry lines creased his forehead. He glanced at the front door and I followed his gaze to Destiny glaring at the both of us. She looked gorgeous in a chocolate brown romper that showed my baby had grown in the three weeks since I last saw her.
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