Blackness Within (The Blackness Series Book 5)

by Norma Jeanne Karlsson

  “She needs someone to have her back, Finn. Her brother’s her lifeline and he’s gonna drown her this time, not help her float. If her friends are from the hospital, and I’m guessing they are, they won’t get what’s goin’ on. We get this. We’ve dealt with these people before and we’ve got the resources to keep her safe while we figure shit out. I know what I’m doin’. I’m not thinkin’ with my dick, since that’s what you’re worried about. Been a pretty good attorney for over a decade now. Give me some credit,” I demand.

  “I trust you, Brian. You know I’ve got your back. I’ll let you know when the car’s on its way. Kid’s givin’ me the stink-eye so I’m also gonna say I’m sorry for pushin’ you. I don’t want you to get hurt,” he says sincerely.

  “Tell Kid to kick you in the nuts for me,” I snort.

  “I’ll pass on that. Later,” he says, hanging up with a chuckle.

  “You don’t have to do that,” Natasha’s voice filters into the room from the hallway.

  “Did I wake you?” I ask, feeling like shit.

  “You were yellin’,” she answers with a shrug as she passes behind me into the kitchen.

  I grunt my way out from under Zeus and follow Natasha. She starts a kettle of water on her stove before pulling down two mugs from her white cabinets.

  “You don’t need to pay for Blake. He’s my responsibility,” she mutters with her back still to me.

  “Are you in the financial position to take care of Blake?” I ask, moving closer to her.

  “I can make it work,” she dismisses me.

  “Natasha, look at me,” I urge her, only a few inches behind her.

  She spins around, slowly raising her chin to meet my eyes. She’s exhausted and her grey eyes are like thunder clouds before a tornado, angry and tormented.

  “Blake’s in trouble. He’s mixed up with a meth-manufacturing ring that’s been known to use violence, torture, murder and a lot of other shit to get what they want. Blake either doesn’t remember or is too scared to tell me what he’s into. You’re not safe. The baby’s a further complication. Let me help you,” I say softly, pushing a silky lock of her platinum hair behind her ear.

  “Sully,” she whispers at my touch. “This isn’t a good idea.”

  I’m not sure if she’s talking about Blake or me at this point. I’m not thinking about anything but the warmth forming between our bodies as we hover breaths from each other. The kettle begins to screech pulling us out of our intimate moment. Fucking tea.

  “It was Blake’s idea if that helps you out,” I grumble, flopping into a kitchen chair.

  “I’m not surprised. He won’t take money from me.”

  Natasha slides a mug of tea in front of me before taking the chair across the table, sipping carefully as she does.

  “He also made me promise to keep you safe,” I say with a raised brow.

  “Really? That doesn’t sound like Blake. Actually, that sounds like the opposite of my brother. He’s never been too comfortable with men around me,” she says with a smirk remembering something from their past.

  “What?” I encourage her to tell me.

  “Huh? Oh, it’s nothing,” she says, waving me off.

  I offer her a small smile and watch her over the rim of my mug with an enticing gaze, waiting. I’m pretty good at getting women to do what I want. This is only different because we have all our clothes on.

  “When I was fifteen, Brent McAllister wanted to date me. My mom didn’t care. I never had rules about dating…or rules in general really. Blake had already graduated so guys felt more comfortable approaching me. He asked me to go to the movies with him. I said yes. He was on the baseball team, a senior, really popular…you know the type,” she says, indicating I was that kind of guy—am that I kind of guy.

  I nod and wait for her to continue.

  “Anyway, Brent picked me up on Friday and took me to the movies. After the movie, we went to eat at the local drive-in where all the popular kids hung out. I was wearing a dress I borrowed from my mother. She’s not the classiest when it comes to wardrobe so thinking back now; it was a little tight and probably a tad short for a high school girl to be wearing on a date. My mom said I was gorgeous before I left the house and that’s all I wanted to feel like that night.

  “I could tell there was tension when we pulled up. I clung to Brent’s side as we made our way to the patio. Then the usual shit started. The popular girls started whispering about me, my clothes, my make-up, me bein’ a slut. Typical, right?”

  I nod again, feeling my face getting irritated with the direction of this story. I hope the funny part comes soon.

  “Amy Porter, the ring leader of the bitch clique, zeroed in on me when her boyfriend, Morgan came to talk to me. Brent had gone to the bathroom and Morgan took the advantage. He stared at my boobs the whole time he talked to me until a strawberry shake was emptied on my head. I screamed and jumped to my feet making my short dress ride up higher revealing half of my naked ass cheeks because, of course, I was wearing a thong. The groups started laughing and cheering on the abuse. When Brent got back from the bathroom, he just stood there. He didn’t help me try to clean off or offer to take me home. He just stood there embarrassed that he was my date.

  “That’s when Blake showed up. He beat the ever-loving shit out of Brent and then turned on the crowd. He roared at them like the proud lion he was back then and leveled some very real threats. Once he was done and leading me past Brent’s broken bleeding body, he told me, ‘I’ll never trust another man to protect you like I do.’”

  Natasha takes a deep breath and locks her stormy greys with mine before finishing, “So I think it’s funny that he’s been around you for a total of maybe half an hour and he’s doin’ somethin’ he swore he’d never do. You’ve charmed my brother, Sully. I think it’s hilarious.”

  With that, she bursts into hysterical laughter. Her head tipped back, shoulders heaving and a sound so hypnotic I lose myself in it instantly. I chuckle along with her wishing I was there fifteen years ago to beat the shit out of Brent McAllister. I may not be much in life, but I’d never stand on the sidelines while my date was brutalized. Shit as a teenager I protected what was mine, even if a girl was only mine for the evening. I took that shit seriously. Still do.

  Natasha

  I’m laughing like a hyena. It’s a good thing I’m not one to be concerned with what people think of me because Sully is looking at me like maybe he should check me into a psychiatric unit. It takes longer than I’d like, but I finally steady my breathing after my stomach begins to cramp. I’m definitely losing it.

  “Sorry,” I hiccup, swiping tears from my cheeks.

  Sully clears his throat and steeples his hands on the table before responding, “If I’d been there with Brent McAllister and that group of idiots, I wouldn’t be an attorney. I’d be in prison.”

  I’m no longer laughing. I feel something in the pit of my stomach that says run. So I do just that. I push back from the table with such force an ear-piercing screech echoes through the room. I grab my mug and move to grab his when he traps my wrist in his firm grasp.

  “I didn’t say that to scare you. I understand if it did though. I told you earlier today and it still stands. You should be afraid of me, Natasha. Trust that fear. But know this,” he says pointedly, lifting his chin to meet my gaze with force. “I’ll keep you safe. Nothing will happen to you on my watch.”

  Sully releases my wrist, but his words and his dark chocolate eyes have me captive. I’m stuck staring at the anomaly before me. How can a man scare the shit out of me and make me feel completely secure at the same time? There’s a possessive edge to his words and actions with me. I’m familiar with it because I get the same thing from Blake, but Sully’s different. I’m not his sister and he’s not looking at me like family. In this moment, in this completely fucked up situation, I find it a welcome sensation.

  He keeps telling me to trust the fear I have of him. I do. I trust it like I trust
all my instincts with men. Sully would chew me up and spit me out if I allowed him to. He wouldn’t beat me or abuse me like the men in my mother’s life do. It would be worse. He would discard me. I know what he’s telling me. I’m a notch on his bedpost and I’m guessing there’s an infinite line prior to me. So while I find him comforting and I appreciate that he’s willing to look out for me until Blake can takeover that job, I’ll do what I always do with men like Sully and Brent. Nothing.

  “Thank you for offering to watch out for me. I don’t want to impose upon you any more than I already have. My ex might be willing to step in. I could call him and ask. He knows about Blake and lives close by. That would be a better solution for everyone,” I say confidently before turning my back on him and walking to the sink.

  “Blake said you’ve been single for years,” Sully’s voice close to my back startles me.

  “Blake hasn’t been around as much lately.”

  “How long have you been single then?”

  “A while.”

  “Natasha.” His tone carries enough warning that I stop washing the already clean dishes and turn to face him.

  He’s glowering at me and invading my personal space.

  “Yes?” I ask innocently, not understanding his frustration with me.

  “I asked you a question.”

  “And I answered your question.”

  “No, you put me off.”

  “Ben and I have been seein’ each other off and on for a few years. He doesn’t understand my relationship with my family so we never stick. I think the last time we broke up was the last time. That was about eight months ago. He seemed done with me and I’m sick of having the same fight. Is that enough of an answer for you?” I ask defiantly.

  “And you’d rather have him here with you?”

  “I didn’t say that,” I snap back, as he tips his head toward mine.

  “What do you want?”

  His breath tickles my neck while his scent begins to envelope my senses. The heat from his massive frame is warming the chills he’s causing to flutter over my skin.

  “Loaded question,” I snort, trying to keep my wits about me. I know he’s fucking with me. I’ve been fucked with enough in life to recognize it.

  “You can keep tryin’ to push me, Sully. It won’t work. I’ve had men like you pawing at me since I hit puberty. You’ll have to do more than that to get to me.”

  When I finish, he steps away from me as if I just backhanded him. He immediately straightens his shoulders and removes the lust from his features.

  “You’ve never had a man like me do anything to you. I’ve told you to trust your instincts with me, but let me clear up whatever fucked up shit you’re thinkin’. I’m not that type of man. I don’t force myself on women and I never have. I wouldn’t touch a child, and I sure as shit wouldn’t hurt one. I’m a danger to you because I’m something you’ve never experienced. I’m fire. I’ll burn you, Natasha. But if you keep your distance, I’ll keep you warm through the frigid storm of life raging around you,” he spouts confidently.

  Okay, that’s honesty I wasn’t anticipating. I need him to back off. I need a clear damn head to figure this out. I can’t think when he’s pulling and pushing me simultaneously. My current state of exhaustion isn’t helping matters. Add that to the bizarre idea that Blake is entrusting me to this man towering over me, I’m lost.

  I grew up with a constant feeling of unrest. My mother tried so hard to do the right thing, but she couldn’t. Her life was a mess and we were a part of that. I don’t hate her. I see her for what she is and that’s a lost, battered woman without the desire to change. Any time a man in her life found himself on the wrong side of Blake’s fists, she immediately kicked him to the curb and usually bruised his balls on the way out. Her problem was, and is, her picker’s broken. She would trade one bad seed for another.

  Because we were often moving to get away from a boyfriend, I always felt uneasy. I never felt rooted in life. I can still pack myself and my belongings in twenty minutes. It’s a skill I’d rather not have. This home I’ve rebuilt feels solid beneath my feet, the walls around me a comforting embrace. My tiny bungalow has replaced an absent parent and a troubled brother. I need to feel safe here and when Sully’s within this space, I feel vulnerable. I can’t have that.

  “I’ll call Ben. It’s for the best,” I finish, moving around Sully’s dominating presence.

  I think I hear a growl rumble in his chest as I pass, but I ignore it. It’s late to be making a phone call to an ex-boyfriend. I don’t really have a choice right now.

  “Hello?” Ben’s easy kind voice answers on the second ring.

  “Hey, Ben. It’s Natasha,” I respond softly, pulling the bathroom door shut for some privacy.

  “Hi, honey,” he breathes out, almost sounding relieved to hear my voice.

  “How are you?”

  “I’m well. You?”

  “I’ve been better,” I answer honestly.

  “What’s wrong, Natasha?” his tone is instantly alert.

  “Blake’s in some trouble. So am I,” I whisper, embarrassed and regretting making this call.

  “That’s nothing new,” Ben grumbles.

  I push down the need to defend my brother to Ben’s judgment. I need his help.

  “I hate to impose, but do you think you could come over and…” I trail off as Sully opens the door.

  “Natasha?” Ben asks, getting nervous at my sudden silence.

  “Sorry, Ben. Can you hang on a second?”

  “Sure.” He hates being placed on hold.

  “Sully, I’m tryin’ to have a little privacy. Do you need something?” I grind out my irritation.

  “Hang up the phone,” he demands in a harsh, cutting tone.

  “Excuse me? You don’t get to tell me what to do!” I shout.

  He stalks into the bathroom, forcing me to retreat further against the vanity to maintain any personal space.

  “Get off the fuckin’ phone. Now,” he growls, leaning into my face.

  “Get outta my goddamn face and my house! NOW!” I screech, pushing him in the chest with both of my hands as hard as I can. He doesn’t move. He does snatch my phone from my grasp and ends my call with Ben before stuffing it in his jean’s pocket.

  “I’m not goin’ anywhere. No more usin’ your phone until we know what you’re dealin’ with. I just got off with my investigator. People are lookin’ for Blake. Bad fuckin’ people and they’re askin’ about you,” he snarls.

  I feel a tremor work its way from my toes to my scalp, raising every hair on my body as it travels. I’m going to die. It’s finally going to happen. The bad shit that follows the people I love is going to claim me. Shit!

  “A car’s on its way for Blake now. Go pack up and get the baby ready. We’re leavin’,” Sully directs.

  I don’t move. I’m not certain I’m even breathing at this point. I can’t…I just can’t.

  O’Sullivan

  I’m seething. I’m furious. I’m moments away from losing my shit completely. I need Natasha out of this house now. The Vojtech Bratva will be here soon. They know who she is and she’s not difficult to find. I need her in my fortress of a home where I can see shit coming.

  I hear pounding on the front door followed by Zeus barking and growling at high alert. No way would a grab team or a hit squad announce their presence like that. Who the fuck is here?

  “In your room,” I order Natasha and she complies instantly, running past me and shutting her door before locking it.

  I stalk to the door prepared to beat someone’s face in. I grab Zeus’s collar, but I do nothing to calm his impending attack.

  I yank the door open to find a small skinny guy wearing glasses. He looks panicked and out of breath.

  “Zeus, off,” he commands and the dog does as instructed.

  I see.

  “Ben?” I question lightly.

  “Where’s Natasha?” he ignores my question, attempting to p
ush past me into the house.

  I hold my ground.

  “I’ll call the police. If you’re here threatening Natasha for her piece of trash brother, you’ll be sorry. Now, move out of my way so I can find my girlfriend,” he instructs with no real threat in his voice.

  “Ex,” I correct harshly.

  “Who are you?”

  “I’ve got things under control here for Natasha. You can go back home.” It’s my turn to ignore his question.

  “I’m not leaving until I know she’s okay. Natasha!” he yells beyond me.

  I hear her door open as she quickly comes running to this douche bag. I fight the eye roll.

  “Thank God. Are you all right?” Ben asks Natasha as she comes into view.

  “I’m fine,” she lies.

  I take the advantage her proximity offers me, pulling her under my arm. Her body goes stiff, but she makes no move to fight me. Ben’s eyes bug out of his head at my action. Mission accomplished.

  “I…uh…well…you didn’t sound fine. And then you hung up on me after yelling. If this man is threatening you, I’ll call the authorities. Just give me an indication that you need help. I’m not afraid of him,” he lies. He’s shaking in his loafers.

  Natasha clears her throat and takes a deep breath before responding.

  “I’m fine, Ben. Really. I shouldn’t have bothered you. I appreciate you coming over to check on me—”

  “What the fuck is goin’ on?” Blake grumbles from behind us.

  Natasha tries to wiggle free from my grasp to turn toward her brother, but I hold her in place. Zeus lays down at my feet no longer at alert, but not willing to retreat. Blake slides next to me and I see a fight coming.

  “Are you Blake?” Ben sneers.

  “Who the fuck are you?” Blake growls back.

  “I’m Natasha’s boyfriend. What have you done this time? Do you have any idea what you’ve put this woman through? You’ve destroyed her. She can’t have a life because of you!” the twerp yells like a child.