by James Ellroy
"He moved into the creek house down there."
My mother said doubtfully, "Oh, yes. I heard there was a ditcher's family moving in down there."
Well, I wanted to know what a ditcher was, and while Mother was explaining to me about drainage ditches out on the prairie and how the tile was laid in them, here came Nelly hustling up the road as fast as he could leg it. He had something big and heavy that he had to carry in both hands. When he got into the yard we could see that he did have a revolver, and it looked like a real one.
Mother exclaimed, and went to open the door for him. He ducked inside, bareheaded and cold, with his dirty, thin, straw-colored hair sticking every which way, and the old red coat still dangling loose.
"I dot my dun," he said.
It was a large revolver—probably about a .44. It had a yellow handle, but the metal parts were a mass of rust. The cylinder and hammer were rusted tight and couldn't be moved.
"Why, little boy," Mother exclaimed in horror, "where on earth did you get this?"
He said that he got it at home.
Mother lured it out of his hands, but only after she had praised it extravagantly. She got him to put the revolver on the library table, and then she took us both out to the kitchen, where we had milk and molasses cookies.
My father came home from his newspaper office before Nelly had gone. We showed Father the gun, and he lighted the lamp on the library table and examined the revolver thoroughly.
"My goodness, Ethel," he said to my mother, "it's got cartridges in it!"
"Cartridges?"
"Yes, it sure has. They're here in the cylinder, all rusted in tight. Good thing the rest of it is just as rusty."
He put on his coat again and said that he'd take Nelson home. It was growing dark and was almost suppertime, and he was afraid the boy might be lost there in the new surroundings of Elm City. Nelson wanted his gun, but my father said no and put it in his own overcoat pocket. I was allowed to go along with them.
When we got to the creek house, Father rapped on the door and Nelly's mother opened it. She was a scrawny, pale-faced woman, very roundshouldered, in a calico dress. Nelly's father wasn't there; he had gone to take one of the teams back. There were several girls—Nelly's sisters—strung out all the way from little kids to a big, bony creature as tall as her mother.
Father brought out the gun and said that it wasn't wise to let little kids go carrying things like that around.
"You little devil!" said Nelly's mother to Nelly, and she laughed when she said it. "What on earth were you doing with that?"
The girls crowded close and looked. "Why, it's Jay's gun!" said the eldest one.
Father wanted to know who Jay was. They laughed a lot while they were telling him, although they were remarkably close-lipped about it at the same time. All that Father could get out of them was the fact that they used to live in Oklahoma, and Jay was somebody who used to stay at their house. He had left that gun there once, and they still kept it—as a kind of memorial for Jay, it would seem.
"I swear Nelly must have taken it out of the bureau drawer," said Mrs. Tare, still smiling. "You little devil, you got to behave yourself, you got to!" And she gave him a kind of spat with her hand, but not as if she were mad. They all seemed to think it was cute, for him to sneak off with that gun.
Father said goodbye and we went home. It was dark now, and all the way up the hill and past Mr. Boston's farmyard, I kept wondering about this new little boy and the rusty revolver. I kept breathing hard, trying to breathe that strange oily smell out of my nose. It was the odor of their house and of themselves—the same odor I had noticed when Nelly tussled with me.
My father said quite calmly that he supposed Jay was an Oklahoma outlaw. Unintentionally, he thus gave Nelson Tare a fantastic importance in my eyes. I did not dream then that Jay, instead of old Barton Tare with his sloppy mustache, might have been Nelly's own father. Perhaps it is a dream, even as I write the words now. But I think not.
When Nelly grew older, he possessed a great many physical virtues. He was remarkably agile in the use of his hands and arms. He had no fear of height; he would climb any windmill within reach and he could stump any boy in that end of town when it came to Stump-the-Leader. But Nelly Tare liked guns better than he did games.
At the air-rifle stage of our development, Nelly could shoot rings around any of us. He and I used to go up in our barn and lie on the moldy, abandoned hay of the old mow. There were rats that sometimes came into the chicken run next door, to eat the chickens' food. I never did shoot a rat with my BB gun, and for some reason Nelly never did either. That was funny, because he was such a good shot. We used to amuse ourselves, while waiting for rats, by trying to peck away at the chickens' water pan. It was a good healthy distance, and I'd usually miss. But the side of the pan which faced our way had the enamel all spotted off by Nelly's accurate fire.
He owned an air-pump gun of his own, but not for long. He traded it to somebody for an old .22, and after that there was little peace in the neighborhood. He was always shooting at tin cans or bottles on the roadside dump. He was always hitting too.
In the winter of 1914, Nelly and I went hunting with Clyde Boston. Clyde was a huge, ruddy-faced young man at least ten years older than Nelly and I. He lived with his parents across from our corner.
One day there was deep snow, and Nelly and I were out exploring. He had his .22, and every now and then he'd bang away at a knot on a fence post. At last we wandered into Boston's barnyard, and found Clyde in the barn, filling his pockets with shotgun shells.
He had a shotgun too—a fine repeater, gleaming blue steel—and Nelly wanted to know what Clyde was doing. "Going hunting?"
"Come on, Clyde," I said, "let us go! Nelly's got his gun."
Clyde took the little rifle and examined it critically. "This won't do for hunting around here," he said. "I'm going out after rabbits, and you got to have a shotgun for that. Rifle bullets are apt to carry too far and hit somebody, or maybe hit a pig or something. Anyway, you couldn't hit a cottontail on the run with that."
"Hell I couldn't," said Nelly.
I said, "Clyde, you let us go with you and we'll beat up the game. We'll scare the rabbits out of the weeds, because you haven't got any dog. Then you can shoot them when they run out. Maybe you'll let us have one shot each, huh, Clyde— maybe?"
Clyde said that he would see, and he made Nelly leave his rifle at the barn. We went quartering off through the truck garden on the hillside.
The snow had fallen freshly, but already there was a mass of rabbit tracks everywhere. You could see where the cottontails had run into the thickest, weediest coverts to feed upon dry seeds.
Clyde walked in the middle, with his face apple-colored with the cold and his breath blowing out. Nelly and I spread wide, to scare up the game. We used sticks and snowballs to alarm the thickets, and we worked hard at it. The big twelve-gauge gun began to bang every once in a while. Clyde had three cottontails hanging furry from his belt before we got to the bend in the creek opposite the Catholic cemetery. Then finally he passed the gun over to me and told me I could have the next chance.
It came pretty soon. We saw a cottontail in his set—a gray little mound among the vervain stalks. I lifted the muzzle, but Clyde said that it wasn't fair to shoot rabbits in the set, and made Nelly throw a snowball. The cottontail romped out of there in a hurry, and I whaled away with the shotgun and managed to wound the rabbit and slow him down. I fired again and missed, and Clyde caught up with the rabbit after a few strides. He put the poor peeping thing out of its misery by rapping it on the head.
I tied the rabbit to the belt of my mackinaw, and Clyde passed the shotgun over to Nelly.
Nelly's face was pale.
"Watch your step," said Clyde. "Remember to keep the safety on until you see something to shoot."
"Sure," said Nelly Tare.
We crossed the creek without starting any more rabbits, and came down the opposite side of the stre
am. Then a long-legged jack jumped up out of a deep furrow where there had been some fall plowing, and ran like a mule ahead of us.
"Look at those black ears!" Clyde sang out. "It's a jack! Get him, Nelly —get him!"
Well, Nelson had the gun at his shoulder; at first I thought he had neglected to touch the safety —I thought he couldn't pull the trigger because the safety was on. He kept swinging the muzzle of the gun, following the jackrabbit in its erratic course, until the rabbit slowed up a little.
The jack bobbed around behind a tree stump, and then came out on the other side. It squatted down on top of the snow and sat looking at us. It hopped a few feet farther and then sat up again to watch.
"For gosh sakes," said Clyde Boston, "what's the matter with you, kid? There he is, looking at you."
Nelson Tare just stood like a snow man, or rather like a snow boy. He kept the rabbit covered; his dirty blue finger didn't move. The trigger waited, the shell in the barrel waited, and so did we.
Nelly's face was deathly white under the dirt that streaked it. The eyes were blank little marbles, as always; even his nose seemed pointed like the sights of a gun. And yet he did not shoot.
Clyde said, half under his breath, "I guess that's what they call buck fever. You got the buck, Nelly." He hurried over to take the shotgun.
Blood from the last-killed rabbit made little dots on the snow around my feet, though the animal was freezing fast.
"Can't you see him, Nelly?"
Nelson said, "Yes. I—"
Clyde lost all patience. "Oh, for gosh sake!" he exclaimed, and grabbed the gun. But our combined motions startled the jackrabbit, and he vanished into the creek gorge beyond.
Something had happened there in the snow; none of us knew exactly what had happened. But whatever it was, it took the edge off our sport. We tramped along a cattle path next to the stream, with Clyde carrying the shotgun. We boys didn't scare up any more game. Nelly kept looking at the rabbits, which bounced and rubbed their frozen red against Clyde Boston's overalls.
Clyde teased him, all the way back to the Boston barnyard. He'd say, "Nelly, I thought you were supposed to be the Daniel Boone of the neighborhood. Gosh, Nelly, I thought you could shoot. I thought you were just gun crazy!"
We walked through the fresh warm mire behind the Boston barn. Clyde said that he didn't need three rabbits; that his mother could use only two, and would Nelly want the other one?
"No," said Nelson. We went into the barn, and Nelly picked up his .22 rifle.
"Look out while you're on the way home," said Clyde, red-faced and jovial as ever. "Look out you don't meet a bear. Maybe he wouldn't set around and wait like that jackrabbit did."
Nelson Tare sucked in his breath. "You said I couldn't shoot, didn't you, Mister Clyde?"
"You had your chance. Look at Dave there. He's got a rabbit to take home that he shot himself, even though he didn't kill it first crack."
"I can shoot," said Nelly. He worked a cartridge into the breech of his rifle. "Dave," he said to me, "you throw up a snowball."
"Can't anybody hit a snowball with a twenty-two," said big Clyde Boston.
Nelly said, "Throw a snowball, Dave."
I stepped down from the sill of the barn door and made a ball about the size of a Duchess apple. I threw it high toward the telephone wires across the road. Nelly Tare pinked it apart with his .22 before the ball ever got to the wires. Then he went down the road to the creek house, with Clyde Boston and me looking after him. Clyde was scratching his head, but I just looked.
Nelly began to get into trouble when he was around fourteen. His first trouble that anyone knew about happened in the cloakroom of the eighth grade at school. Miss Cora Petersen was a great believer in corporal punishment, and when Nelly was guilty of some infraction of rules, Miss Petersen prepared to thrash him with a little piece of white rubber hose. Teachers used to be allowed to do that.
But if the pupil did not permit it to be done to him, but instead drew a loaded revolver from inside his shirt and threatened to kill his teacher, that was a different story. It was a story in which the superintendent of schools and the local chief of police and hard-faced old Mr. Tare were all mixed together in the climax.
There was some talk about the reform school, too, but the reform school did not materialize until a year later.
That was after Meisner's Hardware and Harness Store had been robbed. The thief or thieves had a peculiar taste in robbery; the cash drawer was untouched, but five revolvers and a lot of ammunition were taken away. A mile and a quarter away, to be exact. They were hidden beneath planks and straw in Mr. Barton Tare's wagon shed, and Chief of Police Kelcy found them after the simplest kind of detective work.
This time the story had to be put in the paper, no matter how much my father regretted it. This time it was the reform school for sure.
We boys in the south end of town sat solemnly on our new concrete curbstone and talked of Nelly Tare in hushed voices. The judge had believed, sternly and simply, that Nelly was better off at Eldora than at home. He gave him two years. Nelly didn't serve all of that time. He got several months off for good behavior, which must have come as a surprise to many people in Elm City.
He emerged from the Eldora reformatory in the spring of 1918. His parents were out of the picture by this time. His mother was dead; his father had moved to South Dakota with the two youngest girls, and the other girls had married or drifted away.
Nelly may have been under age, but when he expressed a preference for the cavalry, and when he flourished a good report sheet from the reformatory superintendent, no one cared to say him nay. Once he came home on furlough from a camp in New Mexico. I remember how he looked, standing in front of Frank Wan da's Recreation Pool Hall, with the flashing badge of a pistol expert pinned upon his left breast, and all the little kids grouped around to admire the polish on his half-leather putts.
He never got a chance to use any guns against the Germans. He wasn't sent to France, and came back to Elm City in the spring of 1919. It was reasonable for him to come there. Elm City was the only real hometown he had, and one of his sisters was married to Ira Flagler, a garage mechanic who lived out on West Water Street. Nelly went to live with the Flaglers.
He began working at Frank Wan da's pool hall. I have spoken about his skill with his hands; he employed that skill to good advantage in the pool hall. He had developed into a remarkable player during his year in the Army. He also ran the cigar counter and soft drinks for Frank Wan da, who was getting old and couldn't stand on his feet very long at a time.
It used to be that in every pool hall there was somebody who played for the house, if people came along and really wanted to bet anything. Nelly would play on his own, too, taking money away from farm boys or from some out-of-towner who thought he was good. He was soon making real money, but he didn't spend it in the usual channels. He spent it on guns.
All sorts. Sometimes he'd have an especially good revolver down there in the billiard parlor with him, and he'd show it to me when I dropped in for cigarettes. He had a kind of private place out along the Burlington tracks where he used to practice shooting on Sundays. And in 1923 a carnival came to town.
Miss Antoinette McReady, the Outstanding Six-Gun Artiste of Two Nations, was supposed to come from Canada. Maybe she did. They built up a phony Royal Canadian Mounted Police atmosphere for her act. A fellow in a shabby red coat and yellow-striped breeches sold tickets out in front. An extra girl in the same kind of comic uniform assisted the artiste with her fancy shooting. They had a steel backstop at the rear of the enclosure to stop the bullets. I went to the carnival on the first night, and dropped in to see the shooting act.
The girl was pretty good. Her lady assistant put on a kind of crown with white chalks sticking up in it, and Miss McReady shot the chalks out of the crown quite accurately, missing only one or two shots and not killing the lady assistant at all. She did mirror shooting and upside-down-leaning-backward shooting; she balanced on a
chair and shot. She was a very pretty redhead, though necessarily painted.
Then the Royal Canadian Mounted manager made a speech. He said that frequently during her extensive travels, Miss McReady had been challenged by local pistol-artists, but that she was so confident of her ability that she had a standing offer of one hundred dollars to anybody who could outshoot her.
The only condition was that the challenging local artist should agree to award Miss McReady an honorarium of twenty dollars, provided she outshot him.
Nelly Tare climbed up on the platform; he showed the color of his money and the bet was on.
Miss Antoinette McReady shot first, shooting at the tiny target gong with great deliberation; she rang the gong five out of six times. Nelly took her gun, aimed, and snapped it a few times before ejecting the empty shells, to acquaint himself with the trigger pull. Then he loaded up, with the whole audience standing to watch him. He fired his six rounds, rapid fire, and everyone yipped when he rang the gong with every shot.
Miss Antoinette McReady smiled and bowed as if she had done the shooting instead of Nelly; she went over to congratulate him. They got ready for the next competition. The girl assistant started to put on the crown thing with its chalks sticking out of the sockets. Nelly talked to her a minute in a low voice; he took the crown and put it on his own head.
He stood against the backstop. His face was very red, but he stood there stiff at Army attention, with his hands against his sides.
"Go ahead, sister," he told Miss McReady.
Well, they made him sign a waiver first, in case of accident. You could have heard an ant sneeze in that place when Miss McReady stood up to do her shooting. She fired six times and broke four of the chalks. The people in the audience proceeded to wake up babies two blocks away, and Miss Antoinette McReady went over to Nelly with those little dancing, running steps that circus and vaudeville folks use. She made him come down to the front and take applause with her. Then she said she'd wear the crown for Nelly, and this time there was no waiver signed.