“That’s fucking hilarious,” he barked. “I love you to a customer...”
Lauren chuckled and looked out the window. That was too close. I swear, I’m gonna have a heart attack by the end of the day.
5.
Hey, still at work but I might stop by the Pony later. Say hi to Ali if you see her!
Feeling guilty and excited, she slipped her phone into her purse and entered the bar.
Landon sat by himself, his suit jacket slung over the barstool beside him. His elbows on the bar, idly thumbing through his phone, he looked relaxed. He’d rolled up his shirt sleeves, tight on his forearms and revealing just a hint of ink and muscle. Lauren spotted him straight away and paused in the doorway, hidden in the gloom. She’d known it was going to be difficult when she saw him again but she hadn’t expected such a flood of emotions to reemerge. It wasn’t just the physical attraction, although she suspected on some level she wouldn’t be so enamored if she didn’t known how passionate and caring he was in bed. Nick’s belief in her always rang hollow. The empty platitudes he repeated because that’s what boyfriends were supposed to say. Not only had her faith in Nick’s support taken a near fatal hit, knowing Landon’s encouragement came from a place of knowledge made it all the more attractive. When he said she could change the world, she believed he meant it.
With a deep breath to settle her fluttering heart, she walked over to the bar. Engrossed in his phone, he didn’t see her approach so she touched his shoulder to get his attention.
“There she is,” a broad smile spreading across his face. Why does he have to be so handsome? she thought.
“Sorry if I’m late. Parker fell asleep in his office after lunch, woke up around five and wanted to hear himself talk for a while.” She quickly sat on the stool, hoping to avoid his customary kiss on the cheek. I just can’t take it. The bartender was quick to take her order, Landon ordering a second for himself.
“I have to admit, that was one of the most interesting business lunches I’ve ever had. I can’t believe that guy is somewhat respected. I’m going to really enjoy watching him fall flat on his face. Anyway, I don’t want to waste another thought on him. How are you?” He shifted in his chair, leaning his right elbow on the bar, hand cradling his head.
“I’m good, tired,” she nodded.
“You’re working an awful lot. Are you starting to feel spread too thin?” he asked. She sensed his concern was for both the business and her wellbeing.
“No, not really. I’ve gotten into a good schedule and it helps having a bedroom right in the loft. I’m finding more times than not I’ll just crash there rather than go back to my apartment.” She laughed, “I think I’ve slowly moved half my stuff in without realizing it.”
“You should move in completely, you know. Saves time, money.”
She shrugged as she considered it. “I suppose so, but then I’d end up living with three guys,” she said with a mock grimace. “He hasn’t done it yet, but I’m positive Brian would wake me up in the middle of the night to ask me a question.”
Landon laughed, “God, yes! He would, I don’t doubt it for an instant.”
As the couple to Landon’s right got up to leave, a group of women swooped in on the empty seats. Without a word of apology, a blonde in a checked shirt knocked her chair against Landon’s as she tried to make space for her friends at the bar.
“Oh, the fun and friendly East Coast,” he muttered with a chuckle, jumping his chair to the left away from the group.
Lauren commented that they were lucky to have seats at all as even more people piled into the crowded bar. When he sat back down she realized how much closer they were. She’d sat with her legs facing him but as he settled back on the stool, his legs pressed against her. Like lightening, the contact ricocheted excitement through her body. With a quick apology, he lifted himself up and placed his left leg on the rung of her stool, her knees now tucked neatly between his. She met his eye, each wordlessly acknowledging and continuing the contact, innocent yet dirty all at once. Lauren nibbled at her lower lip before taking a big sip of her drink.
“So, how about you? You must always be busy.”
“It never feels like it, you know. I don’t want to sound as cheesy at this, but it is true. When you do something you love you never really work a day in your life. Of course, I do have to drag my ass out of bed some days but when I’m excited about something, like I am with MyBFC, I look forward to working on it.”
“See, that’s exactly how I feel! It’s almost like a compulsion. I feel odd if I’m not working. No one understands that. You’ve turned me into a workaholic!” She playfully slapped his arm.
“Oh, don’t give me that guilt trip. I know for a fact you have fun when you want to.” He scratched his knee, hand lingering in his lap. Moments later his fingers inched their way to her leg, lightly but purposefully touching. She could feel the pressure of his fingers through the thin fabric.
The corners of her mouth curled in a shy smile. “I suppose that’s true.” She flexed her foot offhandedly, rubbing her leg against his.
Their conversation remained casual, friendly, a little flirty but nothing untoward. Their contact had an air of plausible deniability, touching in ways that couldn’t be seen or contrived to be sexual in such a crowded bar. Yet the tension grew. They were tightrope walking the fine line of decency and she’d never felt so exhilarated. After some time, Lauren finished her drink and suggested they head over to the office. Reluctant to break the spell, she remembered in truth, they did have a lot of business to go through.
She led the way to the subway station, the air heavy and hot underground. A minute later a fully packed train pulled in, commuters looking miserable and squished.
“Ugh, do you wanna just go get a cab?”
“No, it’s fine. We’re here now. It’s only a few stops, right?”
The doors opened and only one person exited. Landon pushed his way in, Lauren following in his wake, barely squeezing in far enough to allow the doors to close behind. Landon gripped the bar above, their bodies pressed together in the cramped car. She looked up at him, her lips parted as she saw the look in his eye. As the train lurched forward, his hand slipped around her waist, pulling her close. Desire pulsed between them, both unable and unwilling to pull way. His head hung low, almost nuzzling her hair, his breath hot on her neck. Reminded of their first kiss, she looked up at his lips and barely resisted the urge to taste them. The train rolled around a corner, rocking her onto her heels, Landon moving with her. Now pinned against the door, Lauren gasped as she felt his cock stir against her. She looked up, his eyes filled with lust and she realized that in any other location, her willpower would’ve crumbled right then and there. Before she knew it, they reached their stop and she reluctantly stepped onto the platform.
God, I really need to stop this before it goes any further. I can’t keep encouraging this. It wasn’t cheating before but this is definitely crossing some boundary, not to mention what it could do to my working relationship with him. I never even told him about Nick. They walked the few blocks to the building in relative silence, both reeling from their journey. Although it was a warm night, the fresh air and movement cleared her head. She led him through the lobby and up the elevator, commenting that they should make a copy of the key should he ever want to come in. The elevator opened to the dark loft.
Brian stood at his adjustable desk, faint music pulsing from his headphones. Washed in the bright light of the computer monitor, it seemed as though he hadn’t seen or heard them enter. Her eyes adjusting to the light, she noted that the kitchen was also dark, the only light coming from the recessed accent lights arranged mid-way up the walls.
“Maybe they’re out?” Lauren suggested.
“I don’t want to disturb him. Why don’t you show me the rest of the place?”
Lauren led him down past the kitchen to the narrow hall. Strangely, every light was one in Brian’s bedroom while the others remained dark.
>
“Maybe they’re asleep?”
“It’s just past eight—” he said dubiously.
“True. So these are the bathrooms here,” she said pointing to the doors on the right, “and all of these are the bedrooms. So...yeah. That’s about it.” They stood awkwardly for a moment in the hallway, the tour complete and without anywhere else to turn.
“I take it this is your room?” he said, thumbing at the last closed door on the left. Not waiting for a response, he strode straight into the dark room, leaving the door open behind.
Okay, good. We can talk about this in private and then get to work, she thought following him in. Turning on the light and closing the door, she turned to face him. They locked eyes. There was practically a magnetic hum between them which rattled her nerves.
“Landon, I—” and just like that, he closed the distance and scooped her into his arms. She was so shocked her arms dropped limply to her sides. He clutched her back, pulling her tightly against his body, his mouth finding hers. The kiss was tender yet urgent, his tongue softly caressing her top lip. They passionately kissed for a moment before he pulled away and looked into her face.
“I’ve been wanting to do that since this morning,” he panted.
“Me too.” She dove for his mouth, their tongues dancing together. The scent of his cologne, the perpetual sun-kissed smell of his skin overwhelmed her senses. They stumbled toward the bed, frantically tearing at each other’s clothing. He tossed his shirt to the side and gently lowered her back on to the bed, his weight deliciously heavy on top of her. Her blouse was open revealing her black lacy bra, his hands touching her bare stomach. Kissing her neck, the hollow of her throat, down her cleavage, Landon wasted no time. Lauren could tell she was already slick wanting him. One hand slipped behind her back and squeezed the clasp together in a practiced move.
What should’ve been erotic was more like smelling salts. As he pulled her bra away, Lauren remembered all the reasons they shouldn’t be doing this, all the reasons she shouldn’t be doing this. Resisting him was one of the most difficult things she’d had to do.
“Landon, wait...” she said putting her hands on his chest.
He pulled away, confused and concerned. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, I just...we can’t do this.” Lauren rolled out from under him and sat on the edge of the bed, hooking her bra.
“I know we said we couldn’t pursue anything once we go into business together but I think it could work. At the meetings today I saw how well we could work together, separating our feelings from business,” he said rubbing her back with one hand.
“It’s not just that.” She turned towards him and sat cross-legged, staring at her hands. She took a deep breath and held it. “I have a boyfriend. We’ve been together for years—”
His face clouded. “Seriously? You’ve gotta be kidding me.” He pushed away, crossing his arms protectively. “I didn’t think you were like this—”
“It’s complicated. Please listen. About a month before I met you, we’d had a huge fight. He walked away, I thought for good. When I met you, I was still dealing with being dumped...not that you’re a rebound or anything. Shit...I’m making this worse.” She buried her face in her hands. “I thought we’d broken up but when I got back to New York he was waiting for me. He’s been a huge part of my life for so long, so we talked. And then I didn’t hear from you for weeks. We live on opposites sides of the country and I figured you’d gotten what you wanted...”
“And when I finally did call it just about business than anything else,” he nodded. “I get it. I’m a little hurt you’d think that but I understand how it looked. I just wish you’d told me.”
“There wasn’t anything to tell...at first. I don’t even know if we’ll stay together but I’m not gonna cheat on him while we’re figuring it out.” Without looking she reached her hand out to him, finding his knee. He gently took it into his hand. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to lead you on or anything.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” his voice softening. He took her open hand to his lips and kissed her open palm. She turned to him with shimmering eyes. “It’s alright, really.”
“Okay, but I think to be safe we shouldn’t put ourselves in this situation again. I don’t know what it is about you—”
“Agreed. I didn’t mean for this to happen but when I saw you...” Their eyes met, knowing the words were better left unsaid.
They awkwardly dressed, Landon handing her the discarded blouse from the floor. When he turned to give her privacy, she felt a twinge of regret, longing, feeling that their intimacy had become officially void. After checking that the hallway was empty, they returned to the kitchen. Lauren peeked in the main room and saw only Brian, still standing like a statue at his computer, only his fingers moving swiftly across the keyboard. She opened the fridge and grabbed two cold bottles of sparkling water. They leaned against opposite counters.
“So, you’re leaving tomorrow?”
He nodded. “Yeah, seven tomorrow morning from JFK.”
“Ouch, that sucks. At least it’s first class though. You’ll probably have those seats that lay flat.”
“Nope, I always fly economy.” Lauren’s eyebrows shot up. “What? You find that hard to believe? I don’t see the point in spending quadruple the price to sit in the same plane going to the same place.”
“Then why did you buy me and Ali first class tickets?”
“Business, to impress you. A little bit of both.” Lauren didn’t know how to respond to that. She could still feel a pulse between them, a thrumming pull that made her weak.
Fortunately, as the conversation turned to business, much of her desire was replaced with anxiety and stress. They spent another two hours at the office discussing everything from possible funding opportunities to launch strategies. Over and over, Lauren was impressed by Landon’s seemingly natural expertise. It was as if he had an innate intuition for business and she was glad she had him on her side. He finally declared he needed to head back to his hotel to pack up and catch a few hours’ sleep. Lauren led him down to the street where they said an awkward goodbye. They hugged, his arms holding her tighter and longer than any platonic embrace. She stood on her toes, her arms wrapped around his neck. They pulled away slowly, their cheeks brushing against each other in an agonizing caress, until their arms dropped. He insisted she take the first cab and as the car whisked her away, she tried not to look back.
She got home to the dark apartment well after 1 a.m. Not mentally prepared to get up in only a few hours, she sent an email off to Faith saying she’d be coming in midday. I just need a little sleep. Yet she tossed and turned in bed, her mind restless and replaying scenes from the day, particularly the ones from the subway. In a huff, she finally threw the covers off the bed and reached into the bottom drawer of her nightstand. Her fingers rifled through the contents, finally finding the hard, rubbery vibrator buried in the back. The poor thing was working overtime with her recent abstinence but after a full day of sexual tension, she needed a release.
Shimmying her panties off, she closed her eyes and saw Landon. As her fingers worked their magic below, she imagined his gorgeous brown eyes filled with the longing he felt. In her mind, she stood naked before him, exposed and vulnerable. They were in the bedroom back at the office, his shirt open but not yet off. He stepped close, burying his nose in her hair and breathing deeply, a growl escaping with the exhale. Tentatively, he raised his hands to her breasts, ever so slightly touching the skin. Goosebumps raced across her body. He kissed her on the forehead, on the nose, softly on the lips. He kissed a line down the center of her body, kneeling when he reached the spot between her legs.
Lauren’s eyes fluttered open as she grabbed the vibrator, twisting it on. It didn’t take much to get her going. Her eyes closing, she imagined him on his knees in front of her, gazing up with a mischievous look. His fingers gently opened her pussy, his tongue plunging in. Lauren�
�s head rocked back with a loud moan as his tongue probed and licked. Spreading her legs wider, inviting him in further, she imagined his hands on her ass, fingers digging into her skin as he drank deep. Approaching the point of no return, random images and memories flashed through her mind. His hand on her knee at the bar, his hard cock pressed against her in the crowded subway, the passion with which he kissed her in the bedroom. With a shudder, Lauren came, pressing her lips together to keep from calling out his name. A drop of sweat rolled down her neck as her body relaxed. She turned off the vibrator and dropped it limply to the side, quickly finding her breath. If only that hadn’t been just a fantasy, she thought with immediate guilt.
August 26th
Wow, it’s been over two months since I last wrote in here. Shows how busy I’ve been I suppose! I don’t even know where to start...I feel like everything in my life is in stasis. My relationship with Nick isn’t really going anywhere. I don’t want to just fall into the same old habits. I want to work things out before seeing if we should genuinely get back together but we just don’t have time. I’m working all the time, he’s working a crazy amount of hours. Maybe that should tell me something? If we can’t find the time to mend a relationship, do we have the time to maintain one? As much as he might want to, I don’t want to go back to the way things were without properly addressing our issues, our plans for the future. I’m just not ready for him to move back in here.
StyleSpur still sucks. I love the people I work with but now that I’m working on My Best Friend’s Closet, my heart just isn’t in it. I used to be able to put up with all the bullshit because at least the end result meant something to me but now? It’s not that I’ve stopped caring because there’s a good chance MyBFC won’t ever launch but, I don’t know. Maybe Landon is right to worry. Maybe I am spread too thin.
And then there’s Landon. Landon who is probably on a plane somewhere over Utah right now. Landon who makes me feel strong and weak all at once...I didn’t think seeing him again was going to be that difficult, especially after so long. I should’ve told him about Nick from the start cause I really made an ass out of myself and honestly, the last thing I’d want is for him to think less of me.
Playing with Power - Book 3: New Adult Office Romance Page 4