Shattered Dreams (The Believe Series Book 1)

by Angela Fattig

  “So I was a pawn in all this?” I ask, angry and hurt.

  “To me, yes,” he admits. “To Gage, well you were never a job. When his boss called him, he refused and told him as much. However, the oath he took won out. He knew that the only way to keep you safe was to accept the job.”

  I frown in confusion. Gage accepted the job just to protect me? I look over to Jareth. “But how did he know I would go along with him?” I ask.

  He chuckles. “This is going to make him sound creepy,” he says, “but he had been keeping tabs on you for years. He also read every book you wrote. You could say he is your number one fan.”

  I glare at him. “Now is not the time for jokes,” I say.

  He clears his throat and his smile disappears. “Sorry,” he says, “You’re right, it’s not.”

  “Ok, if I have this right,” I start, “You started off watching Facciolo and Rick and then added Gage. When Gage proved to be on the up and up, you decided to place a pawn to draw the bad guys out?”

  He nods. “Yes, that’s correct,” he says.

  “And Gage didn’t know about you?” I ask. “I mean about you being FBI and undercover?”

  Jareth shrugs. “Gage is a very smart man,” he says, “So smart that my superiors want to recruit him when this is over. I suspect that he had a fair idea, but was smart enough to keep quiet.”

  I think about this. If Jareth is telling me the truth, then everything Gage said to me was true and he really does love me, has for a long time. Yes, the keeping track of me is a little creepy, but what else should he have done? The opportunity presented itself to get close to me and he took it. I would have done the same thing, wouldn’t I have?

  “Alicia,” Jareth says pulling me back to the present and I look up at him. “Gage was telling the truth, he never lied. You were always more than just a job to him. That night at the club, he was torn; I could see it in his eyes. He wanted you, just not like this.”

  I twist my fingers together. “Where’s he been for the last two months?” I ask. “I’ve been trying to call him to tell him about the baby and never heard back.”

  “The minute he stepped off that plane in DC,” he explains, “They had him. In your condition, I’m not sure if I want to give you the details.”

  I square my shoulders. “I’m a big girl, Jareth,” I say in defense, “I can take it. I want to know, please.”

  He sighs and runs a hand through his hair and across his face. “You’ve really put me in a difficult position,” he says, “My loyalty to Gage and knowing that you need to know.” He chuckles, “You two really aren’t easy on a person.”

  “Jareth,” I say sternly.

  He raises his hands in surrender. “Fine,” he says, “He was beat up pretty badly. He suffered several broken ribs, a busted mouth, a stab wound that pierced his left lung, and a concussion. He was in the hospital for a while.”

  I gasp, covering my mouth. Renewed tears spill from my eyes. “Oh god,” I whisper, “Is he ok now?”

  He pulls my hand from my mouth and strokes his thumb across the back. “Alicia, he’s fine,” he answers. “The doctors released him and said he would make a full recovery.”

  “When… when can I see him?” I ask. I have to be able to tell him how much I love him and that he’s going to be a father.

  “He’s on his way now,” he says, “But there’s a problem.”

  “What problem?” I ask.

  “We need him to stay away from you for a while,” he answers. “We need to use you one last time, Alicia.”

  “No Jareth,” Shannon yells as she stands. “I’ve sat quietly while you explained everything to her, but I won’t sit quietly by while you use her again. Not now, she’s pregnant.”

  “Yes, that is one of the problems we’re running into,” he says.

  “What’s the other?” I ask. Jareth goes to speak and I stop him. “I’m not saying I will do it, but I need to know everything.”

  “Understandable,” he says looking at Shannon then turns to me. “We needed Gage to stay back until it is time to make a move; him coming here, seeing you, and finding out you’re having his baby complicates things a bit.”

  “A bit,” Shannon scoffs, “You mean a lot. Once he knows about the baby, it will be over his cold dead body.”

  I think, hard. “Using me as a pawn will bring a lot of people down and save lives?” I ask biting my lower lip.

  “Fuck, Alicia,” Shannon yells. “I can’t fucking believe you’re considering it.”

  I turn and look at her. “Gage was willing to put his life in danger for me,” I explain, “I wouldn’t be the woman he loves if I weren’t willing to do the same.”

  “Under normal circumstances I would agree,” she says squatting down, taking my hands in hers, “but Alicia, it’s not just you you’re putting in danger. You need to think about the baby.”

  “Shannon, sweetie, I am thinking about the baby,” I say, “I’m also thinking about all the lives that will be saved.”

  Jareth looks at his cell. “Whatever you decide, Alicia,” he says, “You need to decide now. Gage will be landing at any time.”

  “And if I do this,” I say, “We have to leave here before he shows?” Jareth nods.

  I look between Jareth and Shannon. I know now that Gage never lied and that he loves me. I also know that I love him. I only see one way this can go.

  “Ok, I’ll do it,” I say. “Just make sure Gage is safe before you guys do your thing. I don’t want this to be for nothing.”

  “Thank you Alicia,” he says. “I know it wasn’t an easy decision to make, but it was the right one. Gage will be protected as well as you. You will never be out of eye shot.”

  I nod. “Ok, tell me what I need to do,” I say, fear filling me.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Gage

  God damn it Jareth, I think as we leave the plane and are ushered to a waiting car. He went through with his crazy, fucking plan and now Alicia is in direct danger. No one will tell me anything more. However, I do have my ways of finding things out.

  Arriving at the safe house, I’m out of the car before the driver stops. “Jareth,” I call out as I approach the door, throwing it open.

  He’s sitting on the couch next to an angry looking Shannon. When he sees me, he stands and smiles. “Gage, I’m so glad you’re ok,” he says.

  I stalk towards him, my blood boiling, and punch him in the face. “You fucking asshole,” I hiss. “How could you send Alicia out there?”

  He covers his nose trying to stop the bleeding. “Fuck Gage,” he says surprised, “I have eyes and ears on her at all times. She’s safe, trust me.” He pulls his hand back and looks at his palm. “Fuck, I think you broke my damn nose.”

  I fist my hands at my side. “You better hope she’s safe,” I say, “Or that won’t be the only fucking thing I break.”

  Another agent steps forward and hands Jareth a towel. He holds it against his nose and studies me. “My plan is on track,” he says. “I took all the necessary precautions on this. I won’t let them get hurt.”

  I open my mouth to speak when his words hit me and I frown. His eyes go large as he realizes what he just said. “Them?” I question, “Them who, Jareth?”

  He shakes his head and waves his hand. “A slip of the tongue,” he says with a nervous chuckle. “New dad brain, forgive me.”

  I cock my head and look at him. I know he’s hiding something and I will find out what it is, but for now, I will let it go. “Tell me what the plan is,” I say. “What kind of danger have you put Alicia in?”

  “Enough,” he says walking to a chair and sitting. “More than I wanted, but you have to understand, without her, none of us will be safe. Facciolo would hunt us down and kill us. It’s the only way, Gage.”

  I run a hand through my hair. “That’s easy for you to say,” I throw out. “Your girl is sitting next to you, safe. Mine is out there, somewhere, in danger. Besides, when this is over, you’ll be go
ing back to where ever you came from. We will be left to pick up the pieces.”

  I hear Shannon gasp and turn to look at her. She obviously didn’t know that bit of information.

  “Shit,” Jareth says, “Thanks a lot Gage.” Then he turns to look at her. “I’m taking a leave when this case is closed. I’m not going anywhere until we get this situation figured out.”

  She stands shaking her head. “No,” she says, “I will not be a burden to anyone and I refuse to be just a situation.” She wipes her eyes and starts for the door. Stopping, she turns to look at him. “I am a human being with feelings, and so is this baby. We will not be looked at like that. We deserve respect and love.” Then she walks out, slamming the door behind her.

  Jareth sits there, his face pale and his mouth partly open. The look in his eyes tell the whole story. “You’re in love with her aren’t you?” I ask softly, all my anger buried for now.

  He slowly turns to look at me, closing his mouth and swallowing. “I think,” he starts, “I think I might be. I just don’t know how to decipher all these emotions she sets off inside of me. I’ve never been loved nor have I ever loved. Hell, I don’t even know what love really means.”

  I smirk, not wanting to make light of the situation, but I can’t help but feel like karma is kicking his ass. “Well, it looks like you need to figure it out and fast,” I say, “or you will lose her for good. Shannon doesn’t strike me as the type of woman to stick around if she doesn’t feel wanted, and she’s too strong to ask for help.”

  He shakes his head and chuckles sadly. “Ya, I’m starting to see that,” he says. “How did you know? How did you know all those years ago that you loved Alicia?”

  I shrug. I’ve never really questioned it, I just knew. “I guess when I stopped looking at her, and looked inside her,” I say. “On the outside, she tried to tell the world that she was untouchable. The way she dressed and the glasses she hid behind were a shield. She wanted to love and be loved, but was afraid to open herself and take it. The day she tried, she was destroyed.”

  “Rick led her on, used her?” Jareth asks.

  I nodded. “Ya, he did more damage than he will ever know,” I say, “I wanted to go to her then, but I was a chicken shit and selfish. I didn’t want to come in second and I didn’t want her to reject me because of who I was related to. I wanted to be the only man she thought about, but I thought Rick had hurt her too bad for that to ever happen.”

  He hangs his head. “I’m so sorry, Gage,” he says and looks up, “I lied to you all this time, but that pales in comparison to what I’m about to tell you.”

  “Do I need to sit for this confession?” I ask.

  He nods. “Ya, I think you might,” he answers.

  I blow out a frustrated breath and sit. “Ok, I’m sitting,” I say, “What do you need to tell me?”

  He takes a deep breath and releases it. “What I’m about to tell you I’ve never told anyone else,” he starts and I nod. “How much of Alicia’s past do you know about?”

  I spread my hands out in front of me. “Not much really. Just what Rick told me,” I admit and smile, “We never really talked about it. We were, uh, preoccupied.” I clear my throat, “I do know that she is an only child, raised by her mom until she passed away. Her parents divorced when she was five. Her father hasn’t been seen or heard from since the divorce.”

  He shakes his head. “I figured as much,” he says without a hint of a smile. “I know you’re pissed that I sent her out there, but you can’t be more pissed at me than I am.”

  I frown in confusion. “You’ve lost me, Jareth,” I say. “Care to explain further?”

  “Not really, but I have too,” he says. “Her father was never seen or heard from because he’s dead. He died not too long after the divorce was final.”

  “How do you know all this?” I ask. My gut telling me I may already know the answer.

  He sighs, runs a hand over his face and jumps, forgetting about his nose. He shakes it off and says, “Because, he was my biological father as well.”

  “What?” I asked in surprise. This was not what I thought he was going to say.

  “I didn’t find out until recently,” he says, “The reason her parents divorced was because he had an affair with my mom. My mom’s husband found out and had him murdered. The courts weren’t able to convict him. When he started beating my mom, she left and he started on me.” He lowers his head in shame, “I sent my own sister, my flesh and blood out there and I didn’t even blink.”

  Before I could say anything the door burst open and we both turn. “Sirs,” the man says, rushing into the room, “There’s been… shit. We have lost all contact with Ms. Winters.”

  We both stand and my blood is boiling. “What?” Jareth yells, “What the fuck do you mean we lost contact? Shit wasn’t supposed to start until tomorrow.”

  “I’m not sure, sir,” he admits. “One second we have eyes and ears, the next, she was gone. We’ve looked everywhere and can’t find her.”

  I step closer, reaching for him. “What the fuck do you mean you can’t find her?” I’m seething with rage.

  Jareth grabs my arm, pulling me back. “I’m just as pissed as you are, Gage,” he says, “But it’s not his fault. Wait and take your rage out on the right person.” Then he turns back to the other agent, “Where was she last seen and with who?”

  He squares his shoulders, ready for battle. “At her apartment with Rick Hinder, sir,” he answers.

  Jareth nods, showing no signs of emotion. How in the hell can he do that? His sister is out there somewhere.

  “What were they doing before you lost contact?” he asks, all business.

  The agent glances towards me and back to Jareth before he speaks, then he takes a step back. “Kissing, sir,” he answers and I lunge myself at him, tackling him to the floor.

  Before I can get a good swing in, Jareth is on me, pulling me off the poor guy. “Gage, get yourself under control,” he whispers in my ear, “I’m just as pissed as you, but we can’t let them see that. They need a leader, someone who is in control, someone they can trust.” I’m shaking with my rage, but I nod, knowing he’s right. “Now sit,” he tells me and I do. Turning back to the agent as he’s dusting himself off, he says, “We have a leak, Roger, a leak that needs to be neutralized now, understand?”

  He nods. “As you wish, sir,” he says eyeing me and then leaves the room.

  “Now more than ever,” I start, “You need to tell me what the plan was.”

  He turns and nods. “You’re right,” he admits, “But you’re not going to like it.” I glare at him. “Fine, Alicia was being used as bait. She was to allow Rick to get close, form a romantic relationship if need be. Don’t look at me like that. She was doing it to protect you, Gage.”

  I ball my hands, stand, and walk to the door. Turning back I say, “You’re right, I don’t like it, but know this, if something happens to her, I’m coming for you.” I see him swallow as I stormed out the door.

  I’m going to get my girl back and I know exactly who has her. If I’m right, and I know I am, he will pay with his life.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Betrayal

  Eight Hours Earlier

  Hearing from Alicia has me worried. Something’s off, I just know it. The last time I saw her, I was standing in her apartment, questioning her about Gage and she was questioning me on how I had gotten in.

  It was then that I decided that the plan I had hatched was not going to work. Alicia had grown too smart over the years for me to be able to fool her. On top of that, if she is involved at all with Gage, he may have filled her in on my life after high school.

  Now, here I stand, outside her apartment door, knowing that if I don’t come up with a way to pay Facciolo back the money I barrowed soon, I will be dead. Alicia’s my only hope. If she won’t willingly give me the money, I offer her in exchange for my freedom.

  I smirk. I’m sure she will draw a pretty penny in Facci
olo’s sex trafficking ring. She may not be 100% pure, but she is still a knock out. Yes, I think, Alicia the girl has grown into a very sexy woman.

  Reaching out to knock, I know I have found my winning ticket in Alicia.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Best Laid Plans…

  I’m nervously sitting on my couch at home, waiting; waiting for the bottom to drop out, waiting for the inevitable end that I know is coming.

  Waiting for death…

  When I agreed to be a pawn in this game, I knew I had signed my death warrant. However, Gage’s life and everyone else’s life meant more to me. Since high school, I have lived my life as a selfish person, only caring about me. Not anymore.

  I would be a fool if I said I wasn’t terrified. Who wouldn’t be? I’m alone and pregnant. I not only have to protect myself, but also my unborn child. Gage would have my ass if he knew what was really at stake.

  Shaking my head, I pick up my laptop. Since they are watching, I need to pretend that everything is normal. Well, as normal as I can under the circumstances.

  Before I can get my mind to focus on the current book I had been writing, there is a knock at the door. I sigh, setting the laptop back down, and stand; showtime.

  Pulling the door open, I plaster a fake smile on my face. “Rick, I’m so happy you could come by,” I say, stepping back to make room for him to enter.

  Closing the door, I turn to find him smiling at me and my stomach does a flip. The smile I once found to be the sexiest in the world, now makes me sick. He reaches out and strokes my cheek. I want to cringe at his touch, but I have to keep it together.

  “I was happy to get your call, Alicia,” he says. “You know I would give anything if I could go back and takeaway the hurtful things my childish self said to you.”