‘This is our room,’ he corrected her.
Her eyes darted from corner to corner, from wardrobe to wardrobe, and saw what she should have seen before―his suits and shirts hanging neatly, shoes in military straight lines. She looked back at him furiously. ‘I won’t share with you―it’s out of the question. There are plenty of bedrooms, so why shouldn’t I have my own?’
‘Because you’re my wife,’ he answered, his calm tone belying the flicker of anger in his eyes.
‘In name only,’ she retorted.
‘Mrs Savill isn’t always the soul of discretion. I won’t be made a laughing-stock, Hannah. We’re sleeping together whether you like it or not!’
Hannah turned away. She felt cheated. None of the promises he had made were’ being kept. ‘Which is Daniel’s room?’ she asked, her voice thick with emotion.
‘Next door.’
At least that was something. She wandered through and looked at the room. It was three times as large as the one Daniel had just left. He’d love it―unlike her, he would be in his element. It had been freshly decorated in strong, bold colours, and there was even a table in one corner to hold his train-set.
‘Do you approve?’ Jordan spoke softly over her shoulder.
She nodded, not turning, not looking at him, but feeling the hairs prickle on the back of her neck: It was going to be difficult not responding to him, not showing how deeply he affected her―and in bed it would be even worse. He would not leave her alone, she felt sure. He would nag at her senses until in the end she gave in. It had most probably been his plan all along.
‘Shall I help you put his things away?’ he asked.
‘No,’ she whispered. ‘I’d like to be left alone―if you don’t mind?’
His hands touched her and turned her to him, and he saw the glint of tears in her eyes. ‘Does it upset you so much, the thought of sleeping with me?’ he asked huskily.
Hannah swallowed an aching lump in her throat. ‘It’s not what you led me to believe.’
‘But you do realise how difficult it would be for us if we had separate rooms?’ His thumbs gently stroked away her tears, his hands warm and firm on her cheeks.
Hannah nodded.
‘It will be all right,’ he assured her. ‘I won’t make excessive demands.’
That wasn’t what worried her, it was her own feelings that were the problem, heightened beyond belief even now. How would she be able to control them? And yet control them she must. It went against everyone of her principles to let Jordan use her body in lust and not love.
It was over an hour before Daniel appeared in the bedroom doorway, shamefaced and dirtier than she had ever seen him, his new suit crumpled and soiled though fortunately not torn. ‘I’m sorry, Mummy,’ he whispered.
She could not scold him. The upheaval was as unsettling for him as it was for her.’ ‘It’s all right,’ she told him. ‘Come on, let’s get you bathed and changed.’
‘I met some boys and we played football,’ he told her.
‘That’s good, darling, but next time remember to come and put your old clothes on first.’
‘I will, Mummy. What does that lady do downstairs? She gave me an apple. I like her.’
‘She’s called a housekeeper, darling,’ Hannah smiled, ‘and she looks after the house. She does all the cleaning and cooking and washing.’
Daniel looked pleased. ‘Does that mean you’ll have more time to play with me?’
‘I’m afraid not,’ she answered sadly. ‘Jordan―er―your new father has a lot of work for me to do. I’ll be very busy.’
‘I’m going to call him Dad,’ announced Daniel proudly. ‘Not Daddy, because Daddy’s not here any more. Just Dad. Do you think he’ll like that?’
‘I’m sure he will,’ answered Hannah gently, silently applauding his choice and his logic. It pleased her that the two of them got on so well.
Daniel loved his room, as she had known he would do. ‘I’m going to ask Mr―Dad to set up my trains. Can I have my new friends in to play with me?’ he asked, his eyes bright and eager.
‘We’ll have to see about that,’ replied Hannah. ‘How about that bath?’
The table for supper had been set in the elegant diningroom, but Hannah was horrified at the formality. China and crystal, candles and flower arrangements. Daniel sat on the edge of his seat, and it was easy to see that he was uncomfortable too.
‘This is no good,’ she whispered to Jordan. ‘We can’t eat like this―it’s too much for Daniel. Why can’t we use the breakfast-room and keep this for when we have visitors? It will be easier for Mrs Savill as well, because it’s nearer the kitchen. Do you think it would hurt her feelings if we suggested it?’
‘I’m sure it wouldn’t,’ he grinned. ‘She’s really taken to you and Daniel. Aunt Kate always ate in here, that’s why she’s laid it for us.’
‘Alone?’ asked Hannah, astonished.
‘Every evening. She dressed up too.’
‘She sounds like the original aristocrat!’
‘Indeed, she was a grand old lady. She was my father’s sister. She never got on with my mother, but unfortunately not many people do.’
‘Shall we see much of your parents now we’re living so close?’ asked Hannah tentatively. Jordan had told her that they were only fifteen minutes’ drive away.
‘Knowing my mother, yes, they’ll probably drop in when we least expect them, or at least she will.’
‘To see how we’re getting on?’ asked Hannah astutely.
Jordan nodded. ‘She’d love to be able to say I told you so. By the way, did I tell you how charming I thought your parents were? It’s a pity they don’t live closer, I’d like to get to know them better.’
Hannah felt warmed and pleased by his praise. ‘Perhaps we can take Daniel up there for a holiday once we’ve done most of the hard work here?’
‘Perhaps,’ he said. ‘Or perhaps we could leave him with your parents and fly ourselves out to some tropical island for a belated honeymoon? You deserve a long, lazy, pleasure-filled holiday, Hannah.’
The mental picture conjured up in Hannah’s mind of her and Jordan sunbathing on a white-hot beach, making love beneath a tropical midnight sky, brought warm colour flooding to her cheeks.
‘I didn’t intend to embarrass you,’ he said, misconstruing her discomfort. ‘But tell me, when was the last time you had a holiday?’
Hannah shrugged. ‘Not a proper one since Daniel was born. We’ve been up to Scotland a few times, but there was never enough money for anything else once I was no longer working.’
‘All the more reason why you should let me take you away,’ he said softly. ‘But that’s all in the future, there’s far too much work to be done here first.’ His tone changed, became brisk and businesslike. ‘When we’ve finished our meal and put Daniel to bed we’ll take a walk around the estate―you need to familiarise yourself with it. Tomorrow we’ll start work.’
In all there were six semi-detached cottages and one farmhouse on the estate. Five of the cottages were tenanted, one was vacant. All were in need of repair, and the vacant one was in the worst state of all.
I could live here, thought Hannah. It wouldn’t take much to knock it into shape. I needn’t have married Jordan. I could do his work from here, and I’d be happier.
‘Is something wrong?’ he asked, when she stood looking at the white-painted building for so long.
‘It’s a bit like the cottage I lived in with Roger,’ she said quietly.
Jordan drew in a deep breath. ‘So even here I can’t get away from him?’ he rasped.
Hannah looked at him in hurt self-defence. ‘I can’t forget him.’
With an angry grunt he swung away from her and headed back towards the Hall. Hannah did not bother to follow. It was his own fault if he was so touchy where Roger was concerned.
She wandered further and spotted the stables and the horses in the paddock, and wondered if Daniel had seen them too. The farmer had so
metimes let him ride one of his ponies, and it had been Danny’s ambition to own his own horse when he grew up.
It was growing dark when she eventually made her way back to the Hall. She crept upstairs, hoping to be in bed and asleep before Jordan joined her, starting in surprise when she snapped on the light and saw him sitting in one of the coral-pink armchairs by the window.
He must have seen her come back. He had been sitting there watching and waiting, and now there was no escaping him.
‘I’d better check on Daniel,’ she murmured quickly, her pulses beating much too fast.
‘There’s no need, I’ve already done it.’
His eyes were on her, and what she saw there brought fresh colour to her throat and cheeks. ‘I’ll go and shower, then. I feel hot and sticky.’
‘Don’t be long,’ he warned.
She stood beneath the cooling jets with closed eyes and a body that was alien to her. Not even when she married Roger and was still a virgin had she felt like this. Excited, extremely excited, but afraid too; sexually aroused but not ready to give herself, hungry for love but knowing she must hold back. Jordan was not Roger. Jordan did not love her. Jordan enjoyed sex for the sake of sex. She could not go through with it. She ought not to have married him.
‘Hannah!’ His harsh voice penetrated her thoughts, but she was not prepared for the shower door to slide sharply open and Jordan’s naked body to ease in beside her. ‘If you’re going to stay in there all night then I might as well join you,’ he growled.
The feel of his wet skin brushing against her own added further floods of sensation. And when he began to soap her, to move his hands slowly and sensually and possessively over her trembling body, feeling each intimate curve, she knew that the last of her defences were in danger of crumbling.
It was the first time she had taken a shower with a man, and it felt faintly indecent, but stimulating and thrilling at the same time. In fact, it was the most erotic thing that had ever happened to her, and she had to fight the urge to touch him in a similar manner.
‘Oh, Hannah,’ he muttered, ‘you’re even more beautiful than I dreamt!’ His eyes were dark with desire, intent on her, willing her to respond, willing her to throw off the iron bonds that still shackled her. ‘So beautiful, so lovely.’ His fingers lightly stroked her heated cheeks and touched her parted, quivering lips. ‘This is our wedding night, a night for making love.’ His eyes darkened with an emotion deeper than anything she had seen before. ‘And tonight I intend to make you mine.’
CHAPTER NINE
JORDAN’S declaration that he was going to make love to her made Hannah equally determined not to let him. He wanted her for all the wrong reasons. He was using her emotions, he was using the power of his own body, and all it added up to was sex―pure, unadulterated sex. And that wasn’t what’ marriage was about.
When she edged away from him a puzzled frown narrowed his eyes. ‘Hannah?’ he queried.
‘I’m sorry,’ she whispered huskily. ‘I don’t want you to―to touch me, I don’t want you to—’
Disbelief flared. ‘Liar! Even if you won’t admit it your body tells me otherwise. Would you like me to prove it?’
She shook her head and flattened herself even further back against the side of the shower cubicle. Her hair hung in dripping wet tendrils around her face, and with the heat and the steam bringing a rose bloom to her cheeks she had no idea how beautiful and vulnerable she looked. ‘
‘Hannah!’ It was a deep, throaty groan, and he moved towards her, but when she put out her hands to ward him off anger hissed through his teeth. ‘If that’s the game you want to play,’ he rasped, fury turning his eyes to stone, ‘then let’s see which one of us is sorry first!’
He snapped open the cubicledoor and slammed it back again, and Hannah felt tears sting her eyes. It had been hard denying him, but this was no ordinary marriage, and she was not going to let him pretend it was.
she turned off the shower, but It was several long seconds before she summoned the nerve to step out and wrap herself in a large, fluffy towel. It had been an omission on her part not to bring her nightie into the bathroom, for it now meant that she would have to dress in front of Jordan, and he would no doubt insolently watch and enjoy every minute.
For the second time she was wrong in her assumption. Jordan was nowhere in sight. Glad of the reprieve, Hannah quickly towelled herself dry, pulled on her nightdress, ‘brushed her hair, and jumped into bed. She felt quite breathless by the time she had finished and lay beneath the pink silken canopy, panting and tense, waiting for him to come back into the room.
She waited a long time, so long in fact that her lids grew heavy and she fell asleep. She woke again a few hours later to find the bed beside her still empty, but when she opened her eyes the next time the room was bathed in early morning sunlight and Jordan was standing, fully dressed, in front of the window. In those few seconds before he realised she was awake she glanced hungrily at him, wondering if she had been a fool to deny herself the pleasure he could undoubtedly give her. In the shower last night he had awoken senses and feelings that she had never experienced in all the years she had been married to Roger.
Jordan’s dark, rugged good looks were in sharp relief, the planes of his face still taut with inner anger, his shirt and trousers doing nothing to hide the muscular hardness of his body. Hannah felt the muscles bunch in her stomach and for a fleeting second wished her principles weren’t so strong.
Trying to ignore the ache, she turned her head away―then saw a depression in the other pillow! Her breath caught. She did not want to believe that he had slept with her, but here was indisputable proof.
‘Good, you’re awake.’ His voice mocked from the other side of the room. ‘You’d better get down to breakfast before it goes cold.’
‘What time is it?’ she frowned, relieved he had made no mention of last night.
‘Eight o’clock.’
Eight o’clock and Daniel wasn’t up! ‘Why didn’t you wake me?’ she cried, throwing back the sheets and springing out of ,bed. ‘Danny will be late for the first day at his new school!’ Only belatedly did she realise that she was wearing a near-diaphanous nightgown.
But she could have been wearing nothing for all the notice Jordan took. His voice was starkly cold as he said, ‘Daniel’s ready. I saw to him myself. He’s waiting for you in the breakfast-room.’
‘You needn’t have done that,’ she said sharply, ‘he’s my responsibility.’
‘I don’t see it in quite that light.’ His eyes blazed into hers. ‘As you are now my wife, he is my son.’
‘Not in the eyes of the law, Jordan. He’s still a Carpenter!’ she thrust back furiously.
‘For the moment,’ he answered, his tone icy cold. ‘I intend to see about getting that changed. And I’m afraid Daniel doesn’t share your views. He’s actively welcomed me into his life. It was me he woke this morning, me he asked to help him get ready for school. Does that suggest he doesn’t see me as his new father? He actually called me Dad!’ There was a pleased and happy note to his voice as he spoke.
Hannah wasn’t surprised that Daniel had changed his allegiance so quickly, but she did not like it, and the thought of him coming into their room and seeing her in bed with Jordan made her feel distinctly uncomfortable; though no more so, she supposed, than if he had found her sleeping alone. There would certainly have been questions asked then.
‘I’ll get washed straight away,’ she muttered, ignoring his question, heading for the bathroom and closing the door firmly between them.
But the next second it was pushed savagely open. ‘I want no closed doors between us, Hannah. You’re my wife, and don’t you forget it. I’ll see you downstairs.’
The relief when he had gone was enormous, and Hannah stood a moment at the wash-basin steadying herself, wondering if this was how it was going to be. Would he lose no opportunity to remind her that they were husband and wife and expect her to behave accordingly? Couldn�
��t he accept the fact that this was a marriage with a difference, that she had as much right to privacy as if they weren’t married at all?
When she walked into the breakfast-room Jordan and Daniel were deep in urgent conversation, and although it should have done her heart good to see them getting on so well Hannah felt herself resenting their closeness.
‘Mummy, Mummy,’ said Daniel, sliding off his chair and running across the room to give her a hug, ‘guess what Dad’s promised me?’ The name slipped easily off his tongue.
‘I don’t know, what has he promised you?’ she asked.
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