by Sam Crescent
“What is it?”
“What is it? It’s me. I never fucking realized what a total asshole I was, still am. I messed up, and it’s all my fault.”
He shook his head, and she was amazed by how angry he was.
“It was a long time ago.”
“No, it wasn’t, and don’t try to make excuses for my behavior.”
She held her hands up in surrender. If he didn’t want her making excuses for what he did, then fine. She wasn’t going to try to make him feel better if he didn’t want to.
Pushing some hair off her eyes, she leaned her head against the window.
“I’m sorry,” he said, reaching over to take her hand.
He locked his fingers with hers, and emotion clogged her throat. What was with her always feeling close to tears? It had to be the pregnancy. She wasn’t usually a woman who found tears all that easy to produce.
Produce?
She was going crazy now.
“I’m going to do better. I’m going to be the kind of guy you can rely on, I promise.”
“Hardy, you don’t need to make promises to me.” She wasn’t expecting anything from him. Over the years she’d grown used to him.
He squeezed her hand. “Yes, I do need to make promises. I need to make a lot of promises, and to make up for all the shit I put you through.”
She glanced over at him. No words came to mind, and so she looked out of the window. There was no point in trying to find the right words.
Letting out a breath, Rose wondered if things would ever be right between them.
****
Hardy fired up the barbeque while Rose was inside marinating the steaks and preparing the butter. He loved his steaks with lots of butter, spice, and pepper. The roses had been placed in the ground, and he was happy with the way the garden had turned out.
“Looking good,” Baker said, coming up beside him.
“Yeah. It’ll look even better with the steaks on.” He looked toward the kitchen door to see Rose at the counter chopping. She still wore sweats that covered her full body.
“You really do love her, don’t you?”
“I love her more than she realizes. When I was younger, it was a messed up situation.”
“You still cheated on her.”
“I know, and there’s nothing I can do for her to forgive me.”
Hardy rubbed the back of this head, wishing he could think of something to make her fall in love with him once again. Nothing sprang to mind.
“What are you going to do about Millie?” Hardy asked, changing the subject away from him. He didn’t need Baker sharing his pain. It was bad enough he felt like shit already.
“What about her?”
“Are you fucking her?”
“No, you don’t talk about her like that.”
“Then what the fuck is going on, huh? I was at her shop earlier ordering shit for the baby, and she doesn’t even have much in the way of security.”
Baker ran fingers through his hair. “I know. She won’t listen to me on security. Fort Wills is safe she says, and no matter what I do to warn her, she doesn’t listen. I stick around the shop to keep an eye on her. There’s only so much I can do.”
“I’ve told Lash. We’ve got church later to handle the situation.”
“Thank you.”
“Think nothing of it, but don’t use me and my problems to get in her pants.”
“It’s not about that.”
“You’ve been wanting to tap that since you first saw her. Don’t try to fucking lie to me. It won’t fucking work,” Hardy said.
Baker stared up at the sky looking really pissed. “I’m not good at this. I don’t know how to date. I don’t know how to get her to see I want to take her out.”
“Then you’re going to have to make her aware. Invite her to a barbeque, or get Angel or one of the women to do it.”
“Angel?”
“She’s Lash’s woman.”
“I know that.”
“She’s also the Prez’s old lady. Eva would help out a brother in need. Angel’s taking her place. Talk to her, she’d help. In fact, all of the women would help if you asked them.”
Hardy wanted his brothers to find happiness. For the longest time he had been a happy man, and he hoped to be happy once again.
“I’m just grabbing the steaks. Keep an eye on the grill.”
He entered the kitchen to find Rose tossing the salad together.
“The steaks ready for me?” he asked.
“Yes.”
She moved to one of the far counters, picking up two trays. “We’ve got enough here for leftovers.”
“I don’t think so, babe. These are all going to be eaten tonight.”
“I forgot how much you loved your beef.”
He took the pans from her, and Rose tilted her head back to look at him. The way her head tilted back showed off a great deal of her neck. He’d spent many hours, kissing, nipping, and biting her neck. Whenever he got started on her neck she was putty in his hands, and he could arouse her with a few nips of his teeth.
“Stop thinking about what you’re thinking about,” she said.
“What?”
“You’re thinking about sex. I’ve not forgotten what that looks like.”
“Baker and I have got to go to church tonight. I forgot about it, but we should be back in time for that movie.”
She smiled. “It’ll give me time to get snacks ready. Will it be you and Baker?”
“Yes. I’m not inviting any other brother. It’s bad enough sharing you with Baker.”
“He’s not too bad.”
“Only because I know he’s got a thing for Millie.”
Rose sighed. “I know, right? It’s crazy, and he doesn’t even know how to date. Millie is clueless of his interest of course.”
“Boy doesn’t have a clue what to do.”
She giggled. “I can’t believe we’re talking about this. We’re not in school anymore.”
“We’re all still kids at heart.”
“Some of us don’t grow out of it.” She took a step back, and the moment was lost.
Hardy didn’t try to get the moment back, taking the beef outside. Baker was sat in a lounge chair, basking in the sun.
“Damn, it’s hot.”
Rolling his eyes, Hardy placed the steaks onto the grill. The sizzle had his mouth watering and made him realize how hungry he was.
He handled the grill while Baker caught some sun. Rose came out to set the table, and Hardy threw a rock at Baker getting him to help.
Within thirty minutes they were sitting around the table eating steaks, salad, and potatoes.
Rose moaned her approval, and it went straight to his dick. He watched her licking her fingers clean toward the end. It became uncomfortable for him to move.
“That was delicious,” Rose said.
“The best steak I ever had,” Baker said, resting back in his chair, rubbing his stomach.
“I’m pleased I’ve still got my uses.” Hardy sat back, content with his food, and his way of life.
Almost contented.
Rose was running fingers across her bottom lip, and he caught sight of her finger without a ring on it. He didn’t like that. She should be wearing his ring.
“I missed how good you were at the barbeque.”
“Did you use to spend a lot of time in front of the grill?” Baker asked.
“Pretty much. I can’t do anything else, but I can grill steaks, chicken, burgers.”
“Everything he makes on the grill is so damn tasty.” Rose rubbed her stomach.
He wondered when she was going to start to show.
I did that.
My little baby is in there.
As the time wore on they cleaned away their dishes, and they packed into Hardy’s car. He had to give Rose a warning about being alone. Both he and Baker needed to be at church, and she wasn’t going to be left alone. Before she was pregnant he wouldn’t have minded le
aving her for an hour, but since she was carrying their baby, he wasn’t going to allow it. If anything happened to their unborn kid, it would break her, and he’d have no chance to get her back. Hardy was going to work damned hard in getting his woman back.
So Rose sat in the back, and she was staring out of the window refusing to pay him any attention.
He could handle the cold shoulder. It wasn’t the first time he had to live through it, and now she was pregnant. Her hormones were all over the place.
That baby was his last chance to make things right with his woman. He’d fucked up in many things, but the love he had for Rose was pure, soul destroying, and he wasn’t going to let her go. Hardy hadn’t fought for much in his life, but when it came to Rose, he’d fight.
Eva, Sophia, Lacey, Prue, and Sunshine were waiting around the bar when he entered. Rose went straight to the women and started talking with them. It was good to see her part of his world once again. He needed to bring her back to the club more often.
Hardy and Baker were the last two in the room. Fighter and Ink were also in the room. Tiny sat in the chair that Lash once sat in, and Killer was on the other side. Lash was staring at the chair as if it was going to bite him.
Slowly, he lowered himself down into the chair. Hardy figured he’d be nervous, but to show it in front of the brothers was also a sign of respect to them all. They were a family, and a family took care of each other.
“Lash, you’re meant to be there, brother,” Zero said.
“Can’t see anyone else taking that seat,” Whizz said.
“This was always going to be you,” Nash said.
Around the table the men agreed with each other.
“I didn’t make the wrong decision, Lash,” Tiny said. “I’m old, and The Skulls needs fresh blood. You’re it, and we’ve all got your back. I’m still here if you need me.”
Lash ran his hands across the edge of the table. “Okay, I guess it’s time for us to get to business. I’ve pulled us out of the coke deals Ned Walker is running. I know he’s your father-in-law, but we’ve taken enough hits in the last couple of years to last us a lifetime. I’m not looking for trouble. We’re going legit. We’ve got the capital, and with Whizz’s play on the stock markets, we’ve got more than enough to invest in our shit. It’s what I want to look into. Investing.”
“The gym in town is going to bring in some good dough,” Whizz said. “Investing is the key, and the adult business. We’ve got a few warehouses, and we can employ some people close to start distributing. It’s all good.”
Lash nodded, and even Hardy was happy to hear the news. Getting out of the illegal drug and gun runs would take the heat off all of them going to prison. He didn’t want to be looking at a long jail term with a kid on the way.
“We’re all agreed. There’s only so much shit we’re all willing to deal with,” Murphy said. “We’ve got too much to lose.”
“The next order of business. Hardy’s concerned about the protection detail on Millie’s toy shop.”
All eyes turned to him.
“I was in there today, and she’s got no sense of her own security. She helps the club, and gives us great deals. Our women adore her, and let’s face it, Baker wants to fuck her.”
There were a few chuckles at his words.
Hardy gave them time to have their moment before continuing.
“We’re going legit, but it doesn’t mean we’ve not got enemies anymore. The Skulls, we’re a name, and we come with a reputation. We’ve got to protect those closest to us. Millie’s got no sense when it comes to her own safety.”
“I agree,” Baker said.
“I like Millie, but there’s only so much protection we can put on her without her getting pissed,” Lash said. “I’ll get Angel to stop by and talk with her. We’ll take the time to stop by the shop, offer her advice, and guard her. If we start showing favoritism with her, it could cause some problems.”
“Then Millie will become my old lady,” Baker said.
Hardy glanced toward Baker. He’d already lost a wife and kid, and Hardy hadn’t anticipated him making another declaration anytime soon, even if it had been a couple of years.
“That gives us great cause if she’s your old lady. I’m happy with that. We’re all in agreement, right?”
They all raised their hand in agreement.
Lash raised the gavel, bringing it down.
There was a loud whoop, and then the men started to make their way out of the room. Hardy gave Baker a sign that he’d be a minute. Tiny and Lash were the only two men left in the room.
“Congratulations, Hardy,” Lash said.
“Yeah, I’m not here for congratulations. Want to ask you both advice?” he asked. Hardy’s hands were sweating.
“What advice do you want?” Tiny asked, leaning against the table.
“Women.”
“You’ve been married over ten years and you’re asking us for advice?” Lash asked, looking confused.
“I’ve not exactly made it a success. I fucked up.”
“Yeah, man, what the fuck was going through your head when you fucked another woman?” Lash asked. “I wouldn’t dream of fucking on Angel. She’s my world. I love her, and I’d die for her.”
“I love and I’d die for Rose. I was young, okay? I was young, an idiot, and I fucked up. Nothing was going through my head at the time. I’ve regretted it ever since.” He stared at the two men he respected in this life.
“I cheated on Patricia all the time,” Tiny said. “I never once cheated on Eva. I was young, and Patricia was a nagging bitch. She pissed me the fuck off all the time. I loved her, but she made it hard for me to love her.”
“Eva would cut your balls off,” Lash said.
“She would, and she’d probably feed them to me. I don’t want to have the taste of my nuts in my mouth.” Tiny shuddered. “Anyway, what advice do you want?” he asked.
“Women, I want to know if you guys go out for your woman’s personal things?” Hardy’s cheeks were heating. He never thought in the whole of his life that he had to consider this.
“Yeah, I have to. Angel denied me sex when I refused to get her some personal woman’s things. She said to me if I’m not willing to help her out, then I didn’t deserve her. I learned my lesson. I’ve held Angel while it has been bad and her stomach has been cramping. I’ve given her massages, foot rubs, and I’ve cleaned up her vomit.” Lash smiled. “Like I said, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for my woman. Angel would do it all for me.”
“I’ve always gotten Eva’s things. Wouldn’t dream of denying her,” Tiny said. “What’s this about?”
Hardy let out a breath. “I’m just having my eyes opened on a shitload of things. Nothing for you to worry about.”
He shook their hands and made his way out of the room. Baker and Rose were waiting for him. Baker gave him a strange look, but he didn’t pay him much attention.
“Is everything okay?” Rose asked.
“More than okay.”
****
“Are you okay?” Lacey asked, rubbing Whizz’s back. He was so damned tired, and he couldn’t find the information that Gash wanted from him. There was only one woman he could detect, and she’d been through hell and back, and it wasn’t even the woman that Gash wanted. It was another woman, a woman who had known Gash in the past. From the information that Gash had given him, this woman’s only problem was because she didn’t come forward for him at the time. There was one hell of a reason why she didn’t come to help Gash. The information that he’d gotten from Gash had concerned both a woman and a man, but there were two women linked to Gash during that time. Both women had lived in the same apartment, and one accused Gash of rape and murder. The other had disappeared during that time. Whizz had found the wrong woman, and he couldn’t just hand that information over to Gash, not yet.
Could he risk giving him the details of a woman that was only linked to the one Gash actually wanted? What if Gash decided to kill
this innocent woman?
“Yeah, I’m okay.”
“You don’t sound okay.” She helped remove his leather jacket, and he leaned back in his chair as she started to run her hands all over his chest. Closing his eyes, he basked in her touch. He wasn’t in a rush to take over or to tell her what he wanted. “Talk to me?”
“This shit with Gash. I don’t know what to do.”
“You can’t find the people he wants?”
“No. Whoever wiped them off the face of the earth did a damn good job.” He threw his keyboard on the desk, knocking over a mini box of pens, and scuffing the post-it notes he had on top.
“Don’t do that, baby. Don’t get angry.”
“What the fuck am I supposed to do?” He grabbed the keyboard, and brought up the details he could. “This woman is all I can find, and look at what happened to her.”
Whizz shook his head as Lacey started to read. “Fucking hell.”
“Tell me about it. My access is denied for everything. The two people Gash is looking for are protected. He fucked off the wrong people. Either someone’s protecting them, or I’m losing my fucking touch.” Again, he slammed the keyboard across the desk, climbing off his chair, and pacing the room.
Lacey sat in the middle of the bed staring at him.
Pacing usually helped him.
“Have you thought about Sally?” she asked.
“No. I’m not ready to have this conversation with you, baby. We can’t take on a teenager.”
“She’s alone, and scared. We could help her.”
Whizz stopped to look at the woman he loved. He’d give her anything, and he was doing his best to get her a baby, but a teenager wasn’t right for either of them.
Lacey let out a sigh. She moved toward his computer desk, and he winced at how she tapped on the keyboard. This was his computer, and his fingers flew across the keys, and listening to Lacey’s attempts made him smile.
“Shut up,” she said when he let out a chuckle.
“I’m going to have to teach you how to type.”
“I don’t spend hours on this damn thing. You’ve got your phone hooked up to it, and also a tablet. You’re barely away from the thing. I’m surprised you can fuck me without checking.”