“What’s in the horse trailer, Shane?”
Shane led Goldie around from the back of the horse trailer. “Got somebody here who wants to see you.”
Kendra was zoomed in on Bill’s face and caught the tears that sprang to his eyes. “Goldie,” he whispered. A deep longing crossed his face. The emotion made Kendra’s heart hurt. Then he smiled large enough to define ear-to-ear.
Shane led Goldie to Bill.
“You let him get fat.”
Shane snorted. “Won’t let anyone ride him. He’d rather hang at the fence and eye the ladies. Jess has two new fillies in the barn.”
To Kendra’s surprise, Goldie stepped forward, pulling at the reins and laid his head on Bill’s shoulder.
It was all she could do to keep from bawling.
She stuck to Shane the rest of the afternoon, holding his hand for comfort and teasing Bill about everything she could think of to make him smile.
Bill insisted lunch be outside so he could sit next to Goldie, and Lexie complied. They set up under a tree in the yard and ignored the heat of the afternoon. Lunch was barbequed chicken sandwiches and potato salad. Goldie kept trying to help himself. Lexie fed Bill without even blinking an eye, but it made Kendra’s heart hurt. They talked about the many state wildfires, when the heat would break, Lexie’s craft business, and Kendra’s cake business, finding much in common.
“Ready for birthday cake, mister?” Lexie rose and gathered the plates. “Kendra made it special for you.”
“Aw, she loves me.” He winked at her.
Shane rose to gather plates, too. “Watch it, fella. She’s mine.”
Kendra pretended to swoon. “Two champions. Whatever will I do? I know. I’ll eat cake. Bye.”
The men laughed. She took the load of plates from Shane and followed Lexie to the kitchen.
“This cake is beautiful. He’s going to love it.”
Kendra pulled the cake from the box and showed Lexie the candle box. “Can he blow?”
“Yes, probably. Sometimes when he’s tired, he needs his oxygen. He seems fine, so let’s try it.” She dug around in the fruit bowl on the counter and found a couple apples. “For Goldie.”
Lexie gathered plates and forks and a cutting knife. “Let’s go. Can you sing?”
“If I have to.” Kendra grimaced. “But I usually lip sync.”
When they came back, Bill was discussing with Shane ways to get Goldie to let Shane ride him. Bill’s face was animated and happy.
Kendra leaned closer to Lexie. “He’s making the best of this, isn’t he?”
“Yeah. Better than I am. I sometimes wish…” She sniffed back the catch in her voice. “But then he’d say if wishes were horses, beggars would ride. I’m thankful he’s alive.”
Lexie started happy birthday in a rich soprano and Shane joined in with a decent baritone. Kendra lip synced. Bill beamed.
She set the cake in front of him and used her lighter for the candles. “Make a wish.”
Bill sobered and took the request seriously, then Kendra lifted the cake so he could blow the candles out. They flickered with his feeble breath and Kendra helped a tad. Then she tipped the cake to show Bill the top.
“It’s Goldie.” Delight shone in his eyes. “Don’t want to eat it.”
“Well, I guess we have to feed it to Goldie then.”
“Oh no. Love that horse, but he don’t get my sweets.”
Lexie cut the cake and handed out plates. She set hers aside to feed Bill, but then her phone rang. “I have to take this.”
“Man, Lexie.”
“Oh, be quiet. I’ll be right back.” She put the phone to her ear and hurried into the house.
“Wish she didn’t have to work so hard.”
Kendra moved to Lexie’s chair and dished up a bite. “Open up.” She lifted a bite of cake to his mouth.
Bill hesitated, a slight flush spreading across his upper cheeks.
Kendra persisted. “What? Are you going to forsake me now? If you don’t eat at least two pieces of this, I’m going to be disappointed.”
“Well, my usual is three.”
She faked surprise. “I can see next time I’m going to have to make you a bigger cake.”
He laughed and took the bite.
Not to be left out, Shane shoved his plate toward Kendra. “You can feed me, too.” He gave her a wicked look.
She blushed and promised revenge with her eyes. “One at a time. Geesh.”
“Wait your turn, Shane.” Goldie nudged Bill’s shoulder. “You can’t have any, horse.”
“Wait. Shane, give him one of those apples.”
“Why don’t you?”
Kendra froze and stared at the big horse.
“Honey, you’ve been sitting right next to him for quite some time. Besides, I saw you petting Diamond Blue.”
“Jess was standing close the whole time, so it’s not the same thing.”
Shane gazed at her with sympathetic encouragement. “You’re going to marry a cowboy, you need to make friends with his horse.”
Flabbergasted, she mouthed at him. “Marry?”
He steadily gazed at her, not replying.
“What am I missing?” Bill looked from one to the other.
Up to that moment, Kendra had always been reluctant to talk about her accident. But suddenly she was struck by a thought. What a disservice that was to Cris’s memory. She’d been her best friend and one fatal moment in time didn’t change that.
“I had an accident when I was in high school. Driving down a country road with my best friend. Came around a corner and hit a horse. Killed him.”
Bill winced.
“Killed my best friend, too.”
The sympathy in Bill’s eyes was heartfelt. “So sorry.”
She took the apple, sucked in a breath and went to Goldie. He was a perfect gentleman about taking the apple. Kendra grinned. “I did it.”
Shane gave her a thumbs up.
“I think about my accident sometimes.” Bill’s somber eyes touched her heart and she reached for his hand, even though he couldn’t feel it.
“No point in analyzing it, but I did at first. If I’d stepped left instead of right. Did what instinct told me to do. I was wrong.”
Kendra swallowed to clear the lump in her throat. She glanced at Shane and recognized with painful familiarity the devastation in his eyes.
She rubbed Bill’s hand. “Me, too, Bill. Didn’t even think to try to go around the horse. He was just there. I did the best I could do at the time.”
“Yep. Had a hard time for a bit, but hindsight is always 20/20, isn’t it? I’m glad I didn’t die. Lexie would be all alone and she doesn’t deserve that.” His breath wheezed out by the end of his long explanation.
Shane cleared his throat. “Always thought it was my fault. I knew before I got on Demon’s Daughter that she was acting strange and more cantankerous than usual. I’d ridden her a time or two before.”
“No, no. Not your fault. Wrong place. Wrong time. Happens.”
Shane stared at Bill. “That’s what everyone keeps telling me.”
“But you don’t believe them?”
“I’m trying, Bill. I’m so damn sorry.”
Kendra reached across the table and grabbed Shane’s hand, too.
Bill pursed his lips. “Nothing to be sorry about. I’m glad I’m alive. Enjoyed the hell out of that life. Now, I enjoy the hell out of breathing. Treasure your friendship, Shane.”
Shane gripped Kendra’s fingers and cleared his throat. “Same here, Bill.”
“Got lots to look forward to. New documentary series to watch with Lexie, next week’s episode of The Walking Dead, more cake from this woman, and a Super Bowl visit for the Dolphins.”
Shane snorted. “Not happening.”
“More of a chance than your Cowboys.”
“We’ll see.”
Both men lapsed into silence and Kendra couldn’t stand it. Regrets were such a bitch. She picked up
another apple. “You think he’ll let me feed him again without taking off my fingers?”
“I would.” Bill winked at her. “Hurry up. I got two more pieces of cake to eat.”
Lexie came back outside. “Cell phone’s off. Problem’s solved. What did I miss?”
“A little of this and a little of that.” Bill looked up at Goldie. “Be good now. Kendra’s skittish.”
Goldie took the apple with delicate lips. Kendra let out the breath she was holding. “I might get the hang of this.”
They finished their pieces of cake, leaving a half of a cake for Bill and Lexie to eat later.
“I brought another of my Western paintings for your bedroom wall, Bill. That okay?”
“You keep bringing them and not taking them home.”
“I know. Not using them right now. You might as well enjoy them.”
“Let’s see what you got.”
“Western paintings?” Kendra gave Shane a questioning look.
“Yeah, I collected a few while I was on the rodeo circuit.” He went to the trailer and slid a small painting from the storage compartment. He carried it back to the table and took the brown wrapper off. The painting, done in subtle tones, was of a cowboy on a horse with a calf across his lap.
Bill’s face brightened. “Oh, man. Gorgeous.”
“I’ll hang it then. Lexie, you want to help me?”
“Sure.”
Shane went back and pulled a small tool kit from the storage compartment and followed Lexie inside with the painting.
Bill’s eyes shifted to watch them. “He’s too good to me.”
“I don’t think you can ever be too good to your friends.” She dished up another bit of cake. “Now, tell me what dessert to bring you next time.”
“You coming again? I didn’t scare you off?”
“I’m made of sterner stuff, tough guy.”
“Cool. You choose. I pretty much eat anything. Except Brussels sprouts.”
Kendra laughed. “Well, I haven’t ever put them in my desserts, so you are safe.”
She chitchatted with Bill and watched his eyes slowly start to close. “We’ve worn you out.”
“Well, you are in my nap time.” He grinned.
“Should I attempt to move your wheelchair with the remote?”
“Uh, let’s not. Took Lexie months to get so she didn’t unintentionally give me a carnival ride.”
Kendra laughed under her breath, then gave up and giggled. “I’m sorry. I would pay good money to see that.”
“Laugh for Shane. He needs it. I had no idea he thought my accident was his fault. He never said.”
Kendra looked back at the front door, checking for Shane. “Sometimes an accident is only an accident, but we humans think we can control fate. ‘If I’d only’ never works.”
“Help Shane remember that.” Bill’s eyes begged her cooperation.
It was an easy promise. Shane and Lexie came back and the women cleaned up while Bill said goodbye to Goldie. There was such naked longing in his eyes, it tore Kendra’s heart to shreds.
“I’ll bring him back. Don’t worry.” Shane pulled an uncooperative Goldie to the trailer. He wouldn’t get in until Lexie moved Bill’s wheelchair to the curb by the back of the trailer.
“Bye, buddy. Be good.”
Shane locked the trailer and came back to the curb. “You be good for Lexie. Geesh. Stop the partying, will you?”
“Aww, Shane. That’s all my fun.” His eyes tracked Kendra. “You come back.”
“How could I not?” She bent and kissed his cheek.
“Shucks, ma’am.” Bill blushed.
Shane helped Kendra to the truck, hugged Lexie and said a few words to Bill that made him smile.
Kendra waved to both when they pulled away from the curb. Her chest was unbearably tight and the short shallow breaths she was taking weren’t helping. Shane drove through the streets at a slow pace, winding through town and then turning north to the interstate.
“You okay?”
“No.” She burst into tears.
∞∞∞ ∞∞∞
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“Oh, man.” Shane reached for her hand and squeezed. “Hold on, Kennie.” He picked up the pace and drove with intense focus until he found a large gas station. He pulled the long trailer across three parking spaces and stopped.
Kendra released his hand and searched through her bag for a tissue. “I’m all right. I’m all right. It’s just…”
She cried even harder.
He put the truck in park and reached for her. She willingly went over the console and into his lap. The position was tight and uncomfortable and her feet were at an odd angle across the middle section of the truck, but she was in Shane’s arms.
“Shane, that poor man. God, life can be such a cruel bitch.”
Shane snorted out a short, painful laugh. “No argument there.”
“I was in a wheelchair for a frustrating amount of time recovering from my car accident. I can’t imagine living in one forever.”
He stroked her hair away from her face. “I’m going to find a way to get that man back on a horse.”
She wiped her nose. “Aw, Shane. You can see the agony in his eyes when he looks at Goldie.”
“I know. But he needs to see him. He needs it.”
“Yes, he does.”
“He has so much horse knowledge. Wish I could find a way to get him into something where he could share that knowledge.”
“And take him to a Miami Dolphins game?”
Shane snorted. “No, that’s where I draw the line. Geesh, the man was born in Texas, raised here. He oughta be a Dallas Cowboys fan.”
She put her head on his shoulder, calmer now. “I forgive you.”
“What?”
She straightened and placed a hand on either side of his face. “I forgive you. Don’t ever lie to me again.”
He closed his eyes for a moment, intense relief in the lines there. “I love you so much. I promise―”
She put a finger over his lips. “I love you, too. I should have told you before now. So let’s forget all this and start over.”
“I don’t want to forget it, Kennie. I did all the wrong things and I don’t ever want to do that again.”
“We’ve only known each other three months, Shane. It stands to reason that there would be a few things we wouldn’t be comfortable sharing with each other yet. I’m sorry I put such impossible expectations on us.”
Shane shook his head. “You weren’t the guilty one here, honey.”
Kendra gripped his face and kissed him. “Cris died, Shane. What would have happened if she’d lived? Would she have been like Bill? I don’t know how you stand the reminder.”
“He’s my friend, Kennie. How can I not?”
She wiped her nose. “I’d like to think I’d have done the same for Cris. At any rate, there is tons of stuff we don’t know about each other. Let’s start learning. I don’t want to waste any more time because stuff happens. Look at Bill.”
She sat for a minute, with her head tucked against his neck, savoring the strength in his arms around her, the taste of him against her lips.
“Okay now?” He rubbed her back.
“Yes, help me back over the console. Let’s go home.”
Shane helped her to her side and put the truck in gear. The whine of the tires on the pavement lulled her to sleep. She didn’t wake until they hit Dallas traffic.
Shane switched lanes to exit off the interstate. “I have to take Goldie back to the ranch before I do anything else. He was really good today, but he’s a high energy horse. He’ll need to take a long run in the pasture to settle down before it gets too dark.”
Kendra yawned and stretched her back. “I’m okay with that.”
“Want me to drop you at your car first?”
She peered at him to gauge his mood. “I’d rather go with you.”
“Uh, that might mean meeting my parents. You okay with that?”<
br />
She thought she’d used her quota of nerves, but apparently not. She was ambushed by an “oh my God, Shane’s mother” moment, and it left her struggling to respond. “Yes. Okay.”
“Liar.”
“Well, I’m a bit nervous. But they are your family.”
“Well, Jess and Amy Rose will probably be there, too. They’re moving into the big house with Mom and Dad.”
“I’m okay, Shane. I’d love to meet them.” She looked out her window and watched traffic until she got herself settled into calm acceptance of the visit.
“I know you’re tired. But after the ranch, I have one other place I’d like to show you.”
“Where?”
“Don’t worry. Just you and me. No strangers, no fuss.”
Puzzled by his cryptic answer, she let his lack of answer slide and celebrated his open willingness.
They arrived at the ranch. Kendra got out of the truck and stretched her muscles, feeling all the miles of inactivity. An older man came out of the house and waved at them. From his build and mannerisms, Kendra guessed it was Shane’s father.
He walked down the driveway and approached them. “Need a hand?”
Shane looked up from opening the back. “Hey, Dad. Dad, this is Kendra Dawson. My girlfriend.”
Kendra couldn’t stop a pleased smile at Shane’s words. “Mr. O’Hare.” She held out her hand.
He took hers in both of his and held it. “You can call me Chase. Glad to see he finally made things right.”
Kendra smiled. “He really did.”
“Can you get the pasture gate, Dad? Goldie’s restless.”
“Sure.” His dad lifted the latch and opened the area.
Shane stepped into the trailer, led Goldie out and released him. The stallion knew where to go and took off running like the trailer was on fire.
His dad shut the gate. “How did it go?”
“Great. Bill was really glad to see him. It was a nice birthday surprise.”
“Well, let’s get the trailer cleaned and parked. Mom has dinner almost ready. Want to join us?”
Shane looked at her. “Up to Kendra. She’s been up since before the sun.”
“I’m okay. I’d love to.” She really wasn’t okay. She was past tired and running on emotional fumes. But she couldn’t very well beat Shane up for not introducing her to his family and then bail at the first invite.
Pumpkins, Cowboys & Guitars Page 44