Ryan shook his head.
“I don’t think she was that keen on it being me either. She seemed more interested in getting back to the centre.”
Joe’s laughter rumbled in his huge chest.
“That’s just Gem trying to take control over everything. Take no notice of all that bullshit. She’s a pussy cat really.”
Ryan nearly choked.
“Pussycat! More like a flipping tiger! Her claws are long.”
Joe shrugged and then smirked.
“Bigger the cat, the louder it purrs when you scratch it in the right place.” He looked down at his watch again. “Want to make a bet?”
Ryan looked at Joe quizzically.
“On what? The amount I am going to get ripped up if I don’t leave her alone? No thanks.”
Joe sniggered.
“No, dolt! On how long it takes her to persuade that doctor to let her out of here. Given that the nurse had to go and find him and then he has to come back and take a look at her, I reckon about forty minutes. How about you?”
Ryan frowned. Gemma could be very persuasive when she wanted to be. The doctor would be a pushover for her. He narrowed his eyes.
“Do I want to be here when we find out?” he asked hesitantly.
Joe nodded and grinned.
“Course you do and this is probably the best place to meet her anyway. At least if she does bite off your head we can get some medical treatment pretty quickly for you.”
Ryan’s laugh almost choked him. He caught his breath and sighed. He had to be here. He couldn’t let her walk away from him without some explanation. If she wasn’t prepared to listen to him then it would be over. He gasped quietly as something tightened around his chest and his heart seemed to fall into his stomach. He looked over at Joe.
“I didn’t think the rejection would hurt this badly. I’ve never fallen for anyone this hard before.” His voice sounded cracked and dry and for a moment he wondered if he should have thrown the vile tea away.
Joe looked back at him, serious for a moment.
“Painful, isn’t it. I thought I was going to go mad when Lucy walked out on me. Entirely my own fault of course, but the pain wasn’t any less for that. At least you can honestly say that you weren’t to blame for any of this shit. You were just doing your job, but ten years undercover is a long time. I wouldn’t have wanted to be in your shoes. Would have done my head in...Look, I know that you can’t break the rules, but you just have to tell her what you can. She’ll work it out eventually. You just have to be prepared to wait for her.”
Ryan blinked quickly in the blinding sunlight. He bent his head.
“My stomach feels as though eels have taken up residence. I didn’t know I needed someone as much as this. If she won’t listen to me then whatever David has offered, I’m going to have to leave this place. I couldn’t bear to be this close to her and not have her.” His voice faded to a whisper. He coughed and turned towards the road. “Sorry, sand blowing up from the pavement...” He straightened his shoulders quickly.
Joe stood quietly while the man put himself back together. When he heard Ryan take a deep breath he spoke again.
“So what about that bet? We’ve wasted another ten minutes of my time talking, but I’m willing to make some allowances for love sick soldiers.” He bellowed laughing and doubled over as Ryan’s fist flew towards his stomach.
“Fucking arse!” Ryan said jovially as he pulled his punch. He looked back at the hospital doors and tilted his head. “Ok, you’re on. The nurse went straight to get the doc. Gem wouldn’t take any crap off the guy, but she probably wouldn’t make a fuss either. She’d state her case in the best possible way. I mean, it’s not like we don’t have medical staff at the centre. She would be well looked after there and if she left here now she would free up a much needed bed.” He nodded back into the crowded Accident and Emergency department and sucked in a deep breath. “I reckon about twelve minutes seeing as we’ve been here quarter of an hour already.” He stuck his hands behind his back and whistled through his teeth as he watched the hospital doors.
The doctor left the room and Gemma breathed a sigh of relief. She was free to go but had strict instructions to return immediately if she felt any tightness of breath or discomfort in her chest. The doctor had wanted her to come back to have her knuckles redressed, but she reassured him that they had a nurse on hand at the centre along with all the necessary dressings.
Gemma waited until the man had walked down the corridor before she climbed out of her bed and struggled to open the cupboard beside her. She narrowed her eyes at the sight of the short, flower print dress hanging in the tiny wardrobe. She flicked it out of the way and squinted through her sore eyes, hoping to locate her trousers and a long sleeved t-shirt. There was nothing hanging behind the dress. She bent to the set of drawers and fumed when she saw only a pair of white pants and a bra. The next drawer was completely empty.
Lugging the dress from its hanger, she flung it on the bed while she threw off the hospital gown and promptly headed for the shower. Attempting to wash in the meagre dribble of tepid water and harsh smelling soap didn’t help with her temper. Her residual arm was hopeless for reaching anywhere and the fingers of her other hand were bandaged. She stood half in the water and half out, trying to keep her hand dry while washing as much of herself as she could.
She dried off with the lone, inadequately sized towel and wrapped her hair in it afterwards as she looked around for deodorant. A small bag sat on the shelf beneath the mirror. Peering inside, she was relieved to discover a small selection of all necessities. She used the basics, and feeling slightly better for having clean teeth, she picked up the bag and walked back into her room.
Glancing around, she quickly realized that her prosthetic arm was missing. Even checking under the bed didn’t reveal it and it was a few more seconds before she remembered that she had been wearing it in the water. She groaned as she quickly realized its fate. The electronics would never have survived the soaking. It was probably in several hundred pieces on a bench in Joe’s workshop by now.
After looking at the dress again and noticing that it was one that she could just pull over her head rather than fiddle with fastenings she wondered if it and the wash bag had been Amy’s idea. She couldn’t imagine anyone else thinking of how she might manage her clothes without her arm and no man would have thought of moisturizer and lip balm.
She did the bra up with fumbling fingers, the thick bandages around her skinned knuckles making her movements awkward and time consuming, before she pulled it over her head and breasts. After her immediate recovery from losing her arm, it had taken her only a few days to realize that you couldn’t put a bra on the conventional manner with only one functional arm. Fortunately her pants were easier.
She dressed quickly and peered back into the wash bag. She lifted out the brush and ran it through her nearly dry hair before swiping a touch of moisturiser across her face and the balm across her cracked lips. Salt water was definitely not going to be placed high up on her beauty regime ever again.
She gave a quick glance at her reflection in the mirror and stopped dead. She looked a complete wreck. Even after rinsing, her hair was frizzed and dry, her eyes were red rimmed and her cheeks looked sunken. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply for a second before she turned away from the mirror. There was nothing she could do about her appearance while she was still in the hospital. For a moment she considered calling a taxi to take her straight to see Rebecca or Delphine, but then she remembered that she hadn’t seen her phone anywhere either. It had probably ended up in bits alongside her arm.
She opened her eyes and glanced down at herself. The end of her residual arm stuck out of the end of the short sleeved dress. The pale skin looked pinker than she would have liked, but it had probably not enjoyed being submerged while still in the socket of her artificial limb. She took another look at the skin. It appeared to be healthy enough if a little unsightly and she looked back into
the wardrobe to see if there was a cardigan or wrap that she could use to cover it. A puddle of colour caught her eye on the floor of the wardrobe. The long pashmina type scarf had obviously slid from the hanger. She lifted it out and wrapped it across her shoulders. She shoved her feet in a pair of soft pumps that sat under the edge of her bed and quickly left the room.
His guess had been slightly off but only by a few minutes. He looked down at his watch as he saw Gemma push through the heavy hospital doors.
“Damn!” Joe interrupted his thoughts. “You clearly know her better than me. I thought she’d be forever getting ready. Lucy always stays in the shower for ages.”
Ryan quirked an eyebrow.
“I don’t think that Lucy has ever been on an Army base. About three minutes would do for Gemma, same as all the rest of us.” He took a step forward but then stopped as Gemma suddenly noticed him.
Her eyes moved rapidly between him and Joe. Joe gave her a big smile.
“I’ll go and get the car. I’ll be about five minutes.”
Gemma gave him a quick nod before she looked back towards Ryan. She waited until Joe had walked around the corner towards the car park before she spoke.
“I think I owe you an apology.” She saw the relief course through Ryan’s body. His shoulders visibly relaxed and he took a step forwards. Gemma held up her hand to stop him coming closer. “While I was in the water I remembered stuff about the crash. Stuff that I always knew happened, but didn’t ever think about too closely.”
Ryan’s eyebrows came down over his aqua eyes.
“What do you remember or think that you remember? Not that it really matters any longer seeing that I’ve been slung out of my job.” There was a bitterness to his tone that touched Gemma’s heart. Flying had been this man’s life. Giving it up was bound to be difficult.
“Something hit us before we went down. It pinged off the fuselage as you threw us about the sky.”
Ryan let out a breath.
“Heat seeker. Nearly escaped the damn thing too, but it clipped the rear rotor and sent us down. I was only just hanging onto the thing, but I would have landed it okay if those damn great rocks hadn’t been there. Complete bitch of a landing site.”
Gemma nodded.
“I saw them die. It wasn’t pretty. A bit of loose webbing saved me. It came away from the side of the cabin just as...” She trailed off, not wanting to remember the horrible moment. She took a couple of breaths before she spoke again. “It wasn’t your fault, Ryan. I realize that now, but I don’t understand why I wasn’t told that you were still alive or why you had to change your name?”
Ryan shook his head.
“I can’t tell you Gem. It’s all classified and I’m sworn by the Official Secrets Act.”
She could see the pain in his eyes. He was bound by something that he couldn’t break even for her. She took a step forward and stared up into his eyes.
“You said something while you were flying the helicopter the other night. It looked like you asked me to trust you.”
Ryan nodded.
“That’s all I can ever ask of you, but I’ll understand if you can’t. It’s not easy to believe someone whose integrity has been called into question more than once, even if the charges were fabricated.”
Gemma tilted her head and then smiled at him.
“But it’s much easier to believe someone when their integrity has been upheld by people you know who would slice their own hearts out if the lies had been true.”
Ryan frowned.
“I don’t know what you mean. Who upheld my trust?”
Gemma almost laughed at his quizzical expression.
“Dolt! Do you think that David would have trusted you for even a millisecond with his children if he hadn’t thought that you were safe to fly?” She shook her head. “Patrick knew who you were right from the outset and if he trusts you then so do the rest of us. It should have been obvious to me, but I’m afraid I let my mouth work before my brain stepped into gear. I shouldn’t even have needed that reassurance. You told me the truth from the beginning and I should have believed you without question. I’ll understand if you can’t forgive me.” Her tone had dropped with her chin.
Ryan lifted his hand and reached out to touch her cheek.
“For a few minutes the other night, I thought I had lost you. We couldn’t find you in the surf and then when we did eventually locate you, you went under the waves. If your arm hadn’t already been tangled in the harness David wouldn’t have been able to save you. When I think about the possibility of you leaving me here, alone, my heart almost stops beating. It’s only by force of will that I keep it going.” The pad of his thumb grazed across her bottom lip.
Gemma lifted her eyes to meet his burning gaze.
“How can you say that when I was so awful to you? How can you ever forgive me for behaving so badly towards you?” She attempted to move away from him but he caught her about the waist and dragged her back to his chest.
“Love is unconditional, Gemma. I don’t care what you said or thought. I was in the wrong too. I should never have let you leave my room. You could have waited there for me and I would have been back within a couple of hours to explain everything I could to you. It was as much my fault as yours.” His husky breaths touched her ear, causing her to shiver deliciously.
She leaned back and blinked hard. Had she heard him properly? The sunlight was affecting her eyes badly but the doctor hadn’t mentioned that she had a problem with her ears too. Ryan stared back down at her, his turquoise eyes flicking slightly as his pupils dilated.
“Does that mean...?” she couldn’t finish the sentence. She felt the heat rise into her cheeks.
Ryan gave a soft laugh and pulled her in close again.
“Yes, that does mean...” He left his sentence as open ended as hers and brushed his lips across her forehead.
She sighed and snuggled into his broad chest.
“Good, I do as well.”
Ryan laughed softly.
“We will discuss all this in far greater depth a little later, but if you are feeling up to it, I know that David is quite desperate to see you. He would have come over himself, but he can’t bear to be separated from his wife and children at the moment. Geraldine has had some trouble persuading him to sleep in his own bed. Joe told me that he wanted to set up a bunk in the kids’ room, just so that he could keep an eye on them, but Geraldine showed him a bottle of scented body oil that she had secreted in her pocket. He soon gave up the notion after that and now reckons this waxing lark is more fun than it first appeared.”
Gemma let out a huge giggle.
“Him and Geraldine have always been the same. They can’t keep their hands off one another.” Her eyes dipped to Ryan’s shirt. She peeked in at the open collar. “So you went through with it too. Hmm, I wonder what scented body oil would smell good on you.”
Ryan breathed in a ragged breath as he ran his hands down the dip of her spine.
“Shit...David will have to wait. We can see the children and discuss plans for my future another time. It won’t matter if we don’t begin the corporate pick-up service for the hotel and flying lessons for another week or so.”
Gemma leaned back and stared up at her handsome pilot.
“So David is going to employ you?”
Ryan spun around as he heard a short hoot. Joe sat inside the Range Rover, just a few metres away. Ryan gently took hold of Gemma’s bandaged hand.
“Yes, I’m going to be doing a school run in his newly acquired helicopter as of next year when Robbie goes to Brest, and the rest of the time I’ll be chauffeuring around all the big wigs at the château. Ellen reckons that the hotel will see a profit from the extra special package for her corporate clients within weeks if we offer lessons as well. You know what people like that are like. They won’t be able to resist it...A bit like how I can’t resist you. Now will you stop asking me questions and get in the car? There are a few things that we need to do immed
iately, not least of which is to rub scented oil all over my exceptionally smooth chest.
Epilogue
She gulped nervously before she took a step forward. Ryan held her hand but made no move to force her forwards.
“It’s okay Gemma, we don’t have to do it this way if you don’t want to. I can ask Joe to bring the car back around.”
Gemma glanced up at the man beside her. His Aqua eyes blazed down at her, full love and future promises. She gave his hand a tight squeeze and then lifted her dress as she moved forwards determinedly.
Ryan handed her up into the cabin and settled the flounces of ivory lace about his beautiful bride. He kissed her lips gently as he climbed into the craft. He deepened the kiss as Gemma’s arm wound around his neck and pulled him in tighter.
“Jeez woman, you’re going to be the death of me. Let me get this bird in the air and we can start the honeymoon a little sooner.” He moved over to the pilot’s seat.
The engines started and the rotors began to turn. Gemma closed her eyes and fisted her hand in her skirt. She felt a warm hand caress her cheek and she opened her eyes. They were hovering above the waving crowd gathered in the rehab centre garden. She laughed as she noticed Ben grab William’s shoulders and angled the man to wave in the right direction.
The day had been perfect from beginning to end. They had married in Roscoff and had their perfect wedding breakfast in the centre. All the dishes were cooked by the guests with added dishes made by Patrick. The children had played in the orchard and the guests had sat enjoying the afternoon sun on the swimming pool terrace.
Now she looked back at her new husband as he manoeuvred the helicopter up and over the trees. This first flight wasn’t going to be a long one, but it was the most significant for both of them as their trust for one another was tested anew. Only ten minutes later they were heading back towards the ground. The turrets and ivory walls of David and Ellen’s château surrounded them and a few minutes later Ryan was helping her from the helicopter cabin.
Scarred Survival (Scarred Series Book 5) Page 25