by Paula Chase
But Mina saw it on their faces, they weren’t exactly disappointed to hear that their peers were doling out props for their impulsive act.
Brian pulled the truck into a parking spot in front of a high-rise tower. Excitement filtered through the car as everyone commented on the tall building. They went from the elevator with the TV monitorplaying CNN, to a twentieth floor, three-bedroom condo furnishedas if it should be in a lifestyle magazine.
The carpet was thick and a light crème color so clean it seemed a sin to walk on it with shoes. Pictures of Brian and his parents were grouped in a simple collage on the wall across from the kitchen, black art was tastefully displayed throughout all the others.
It was obvious the Jameses either came to their ocean condo often or wanted it to feel just like home when they did come. The place looked and felt lived in.
Instinctively the girls roamed the entire place, commenting on Brian’s mom’s good taste, while the guys headed to the patio off the living room.
After giving herself the grand tour, Mina joined the guys. It was too dark to see much of the beach below. But the smells and sounds of the ocean overpowered her senses the second she stepped onto the balcony. She didn’t have to breathe in the air, it simply sucked her into it.
That high up, the breeze from the water whipped her hair and chilled her bare calves and ankles. She put her arms around Brian and rooted her face into his shirt for warmth.
Lizzie and Sara came out to the balcony. They stared out into the blackness while Jacinta lingered back, choosing to stand in the sliding-glassdoorway. Kelly stood beside her.
“Y’all know I have a thing about heights,” Jacinta said, her voice shaky with fear.
JZ tugged her arm, but Jacinta snatched it away, bolting to the safety of the middle of the living room.
Mina admonished him. “No, Jay, for real. She was even afraid to sit on Sara and Jessica’s trampoline.”
Sara chuckled. “And that’s not even ten feet off the ground.”
“Are y’all talking about me?” Jacinta called, refusing to move back to the doorway.
“Just telling JZ to stop playing around,” Mina said, like a mother calming a child.
“Alright, who down for a game of spades?” JZ announced.
Jacinta raised her hand. “As long as we’re playing in here.”
“Teams?” JZ asked. “I got you, Cinny.”
“Me and you, Kelly?” Sara asked.
“I’m not very good, but I’ll play,” Lizzie said.
“I got you,” Todd boasted. “We’re gonna kick some beeeep beeeep.”
Brian took a seat in one of the patio’s chaise lounges and patted the seat.
Taking the hint she peeked her head into the doorway. “We’re not gonna play, y’all.”
The clique sat at the oak dining-room table, the smack talk already in high gear. JZ shuffled cards, doled out rules and boasted about his spades prowess. Mina closed the slider and happily joined Brian on the seat, leaning back on his chest, her short legs not even taking up the entire length of the chair.
She zipped her jacket and tried not to focus on the breeze and how chilly was quickly turning into cold. If they went inside they’d lose some privacy. Plus the sounds of the crashing waves was movie-perfectromantic. So what if her ears were thisclose to being ice cold and her fingers were following.
Reading her mind, Brian massaged her arms and fingers gently. The friction did its job and Mina’s blood flowed to the cool spots.
“You know I was surprised when you asked to come over, right?” Brian said.
Mina loved the way his voice, above a whisper but lower than an inside voice, mixed with the sound of the waves below. It felt wrong to break up the rhythm so she only nodded.
The bass from his voice boomed against her back as he said, “I figured we were just gonna cool out at the arena.” Mina felt his chest heave as he took a breath. She closed her eyes, not just listening but feeling every word he said. “That would have been alright. But I’m glad we came back here.”
She nodded again, hoping he’d keep talking.
He wrapped his arms around her, settling his hands on her stomach.
“Would you have come back here if I asked you to by yourself... without Jacinta and them?”
He lowered his head, as if he were trying to look at her face, and his cheek rested against Mina’s frigid ear. Their body heat mingled and her ear started to thaw. She shook her head no in answer to his question.
“Seriously, you have never been this quiet the entire time we’ve known each other.”
Her soft chuckle joined his, then he picked up where he left off.
“So you wouldn’t have rolled with me without your girls?” His fingers tapped at her belly, tickling. “Dag, you act like you can’t trust me by yourself.”
Mina shook her head no, again, took a breath and finally spoke. “It’s not you I don’t trust.”
She sat up, threw her legs over the side of the chair and turned so they were facing each other. She paused when a loud exclamation of “Ohhh ... you reneged!” and some light arguing came from inside.
Noticing that Brian didn’t even turn to check on the clique’s anticsinside, she forced herself to do the same.
“It’s me I don’t trust.” Her cheeks went warm as Brian grinned at her in that way she loved—his eyes and mouth smiling, making his face one big irresistible smiley. “See, that’s why I don’t trust myself. You be playing those hottie Jedi mind tricks on a girl.”
She pretended to push herself up and move away but he pulled her back down beside him and her attempt at resistance was weak.
“For real, you know you’re hot, don’t you? Just admit it,” Mina teased.
“Do I get more points for saying no or for being honest?”
His grin went from cute to devilish and cute.
Mina elbowed him in the gut. “You are not all that.”
Brian scooped her up toward him and slid her onto his lap. “Yes, I am.”
He kissed her before she could protest.
More arguing broke out inside and out of nowhere a music video blared from the TV. But Mina didn’t hear a sound of it.
Her and Brian’s kiss went from playful to purposeful and by the time his lips moved to her neck, nibbling gently, Mina had forgotten they were outside and that it was cold. Her entire body was feverish.
Neither of them heard the slider open or JZ’s footsteps as he walked over and stood beside the lounge chair. His voice boomed, sending Mina out of Brian’s lap like a sprinter out of the starting block.
“Ay Brian, what’s the closest store, man?” He laughed at Mina’s meteoric position change. “My bad. I didn’t mean to bust your groove.”
“You scared me,” Mina mumbled. Her hands shook, from where she and Brian were taking things or from JZ’s voice shocking her like a lightning bolt, she wasn’t sure.
“What, you thought it was your moms?” JZ cracked up.
“There’s a Seven-Eleven right next door and a grocery store across the street,” Brian said, patiently.
Mina squinted inside to the living room.
“Y’all done already?”
JZ snorted. “Man, those dudes are cheating.” He stepped back and repeated it inside the condo, snickering when Lizzie defended herself.
“I told you I didn’t play well. I’m not cheating, just really bad at this.”
“We were just gonna run and get some grub,” JZ said. “Y’all want anything?”
Both Brian and Mina shook their heads.
“Is everyone going?” Mina asked. She downplayed the panic she heard in her voice by adding hurriedly, “It just seems like by the time y’all do all that you’re going to have to take me back to the arena. Why bother?”
JZ took his cell phone out and looked at the time. “Well, Lizzie ’nem staying here, remember? Brian could take you and Sara back.”
Mina’s eyes crinkled with hurt. “Dag, Jay, just push me off the
balcony if you’re that pressed to get rid of me.”
In two strides he was by her side, trying to put her in a headlock. “My bad, Mouthy Mi. I didn’t mean it like that.” He got the expectedshove from Mina as she avoided his move. “But y’all have like an hour. We have time. It’s gonna be a quick run.”
He strode back inside. “Come on, we have time to hit the store.”
Jacinta came as close to the slider as she dared, Sara and Lizzie peeking around her. “Mi, you don’t want anything?” She smiled slyly. “Or, I guess you got everything you need.”
The girls tittered.
Mina raked her hair nervously before waving them off.
Their girly ring of laughter was cut off as the front door shut behindthem, leaving Mina alone with Brian, the waves and the loud music videos.
Brian stood up, took her hand and walked inside. He left her standing in the doorway as he busied himself turning down the TV.
“Man, they act like they’re deaf,” he muttered.
Mina’s heart raced. She wasn’t sure what she mumbled in responsebecause all she heard was her brain screaming, he’s going to turn off the lights next and then start walking to a bedroom. She stood frozen by the slider, her legs refusing to move any farther inside.
Realizing that she probably looked as frightened as she felt, she blinked a few times and fought off a high-pitched squeak as she said, “This is a really nice condo.”
“Thanks.” Brian cut his eyes at her and lowered his voice. “Want to see my room? It’s even nicer.”
His laughter filled the empty living room. He fell onto the pastel-coloredfloral couch, his body shaking from laughing. After a few minutes he sat up. “Mina, I’m playing. I’m not gonna jump you. Chillax.” He stopped laughing long enough to sweep his eyes over her body approvingly. “Even though those phat thighs are like ...” He shook his head and muttered “mmm, mmm, mmm” like he was talking about a bucket of juicy chicken thighs.
Mina smiled at the compliment but it felt frozen and phony. She looked like someone who’d just majorly overreacted in Scary Movie X:The Date Movie or some other campy B-movie.
Her heart galloped, but she moved slowly to the sofa, hoping her fingers would stop trembling by the time she reached it.
They didn’t and Brian didn’t let her off the hook about it. “You’re shaking, for real.” He shook his head, still chuckling.
Mina raised an eyebrow in irritation and Brian’s laugh finally fizzledout, only to be replaced by his signature amused grin. It put Mina at ease and there was a comfortable silence between them, filled by the television’s low music.
She tucked her legs beneath her on the couch, grateful that her heart was slowing down and the awkward moment passed. She pretendedto pout.
“You didn’t have to laugh at me.”
“I’m just tripping off you being straight scared of me,” Brian said.
“No, you mean you’re rummin’.” Mina chuckled. She wagged a finger in his face. “Number one, I’m not scared of you.” She met Brian’s gaze, her confidence growing, but then fading for an instant as she admitted, “But you know we never really talked about ... I mean ... it’s not like we ...” Her eyes fluttered as she searched for the right words before settling on, “You know what I’m trying to say?”
He scowled. “No. Just say it.”
Mina took a deep breath and let it filter slowly through her nose before continuing. “We never talked about ... sex.”
She whispered the word and it made Brian smile.
“Okay, what do you want to know about ...” Brian whispered, “Sex.”
“I don’t want to know anything. But maybe you should know it ain’t happening ... tonight,” she quipped.
Brian’s eyes drooped in a sad, puppy dog way. “We’re not? I thought for sure your eyes popping out of your head was a sign we were gonna.”
He laughed wildly again, ducking as Mina swung one of the decorativepillows at him. He rebounded quickly and tugged at her, causing her to roll to his side of the sofa. She unfolded her legs and voluntarily hopped onto his lap.
She kissed him. He responded, darting his tongue in her mouth. They went on like that a few minutes longer, both taking great pains to keep the heat at bay.
It startled her when he pulled away and asked, “Do you rememberwhat I said when we first started going out?”
Mina’s brain froze. She had no idea what he was talking about.
“No games, just being straight up with each other,” he reminded her.
She nodded, remembering how Brian had stepped to her one morning, asking her straight out if she was feeling him because he liked her.
His honesty was like woah. It caught her off guard that morning and still did most times.
“I’m just saying, that’s me. That’s how I do,” Brian continued. “Just let me know what’s up and I’ll always do the same.”
Mina was glad to hear Brian say that. But she still couldn’t bring herself to make any comment about how ready or unready she was. Instead, she nodded and sank back into his arms, letting their kisses do the talking.
Madness in ... 5 ... 4 ... 3 ... 2 ...
“Do you feel like a man when you push her around.”
—The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, “Face Down”
There was a millisecond of quiet.
Then the final echoing of the canned voice-over exclaiming, “Bluueee Devils!” was replaced with screams of the Blue Devils fans.
On stage, Mina and the rest of the squad squealed, delighted at the fanfare and just plain glad to be done. Glued together in a group hug, the mass of girls moved from the center of the stage toward the small set of steps that would take them back down to the floor and to their coach and fans.
Mina’s heart beat eighty miles an hour. The thunderous chant, Go Big Blue! Go Big Blue! was dulled by the whoosh of blood in her ears, from her racing heart. She barely felt her feet touch the steps as she was carried by the flow of the squad, in between Kim and Sara.
“Oh my God, Mina,” Kim exclaimed in one ear. “You totally nailed it, girl! Totally nailed it!”
Sara joined in excitedly, “I could feel your legs shaking before we popped you.”
Mina nodded. Her legs were still rubbery. She still couldn’t believeit was over. Just like that, two minutes and thirty seconds gone after months and months of grueling preparation. After the ugly, unproductivepractice of the day before—one and done.
A nagging sense of event letdown reared its head. Sometimes it just seemed unfair that it was over so fast, but it didn’t have time to sink in. Coach Embry waited for the girls at the landing.
Oh my God, is that a smile on her face? Mina wondered, in a daze.
Even when they’d nailed Counties, Coach Em refused to relax until after the winners were announced. But this time her usually seriousface beamed back at the girls.
“Ladies, you looked awesome up there.” She patted an arm or the back of any girl she was able to touch as they crowded around her. “I’m so proud of you.”
Still breathing hard and heavy, the girls accepted the accolades. They clung to one another, adrenaline coursing through their veins from the quick, intense workout.
Coach Em signaled them to huddle closer and they obeyed.
“I know you want to visit your parents or ...” she rolled her eyes. “Boyfriends.”
Coach Em had a theory about boyfriends—they were a distractionand she wanted them as far away from cheer practice as possible.She even went so far as to black out their practices by taping thick construction paper in the small windows of the gym to keep peepers away.
But there was no venom in Coach’s voice, just playful resignation. She could no more ban the girls from boy gazing and boy talk than she could will them to take first place. She went on, lowering her voice as the MC announced the next team, then raising it again as the music blared suddenly. “Make sure that everyone is back at the seats near the stage before the very last team performs.�
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She made her serious “I mean it” eyes at the girls. They nodded obediently. A few more ground rules followed—no unzipping their mock necks (Coach hated that even though the things were suffocatingand hella hot), good sportsmanship toward other teams as they walked around (Embryism #20 “Saying ‘good luck’ or ‘good job’ never killed anybody”), and a half dozen other do’s and don’ts.
Sara danced from one foot to the other beside Mina. She cocked her elbow onto Mina’s shoulder before quickly letting it dangle at her side again.
Mina poked her side and they giggle-whispered.
Mina knew how Sara felt. She was just as restless. Her eyes gazed to the rear of the arena where the clique would be waiting for her, then to the area where her parents sat—at least where they had been two minutes before. Early on, her mother had told her that as soon as the Blue Devils went off, she and Mina’s dad were heading for the lounge, a bar in the arena that stayed crowded with parents. Their empty seats shone amid the other seated Blue Devil fans.
There were so many people in there, as long as Lizzie, Kelly and Jacinta kept to the darkened corners of the arena, no way her parents would bump into them.
They should be good, she thought, before Coach Em’s voice smacked her back into the lecture.
“Did you hear me, Mina?”
Mina blinked hard. “Sorry. I was looking for my parents.”
Coach Em nodded. “Okay, okay. You guys can go. Be back before. . .”
She paused, expecting them to repeat the right answer.
“Before the last team performs,” the girls chorused out of sync.
Coach Em walked away, off to join some of her coaching friends, and the girls dispersed into small cliques to discuss plans.
“I’m going to hang out with Chuck,” Kim said. She turned to Mina and Sara. “Where are you guys going?”
“To find Brian and JZ,” Mina said.
“I’m gonna hang with Mina,” Sara said.
“We might try and find you guys.”
“We’ll be in the Blue Devils section of the bleachers,” Mina hollered to Kim’s retreating back.
She and Sara worked their way through the dense crowd.