She straightened and shook her head. She had to stop this. She had made it home, and now she needed to be in the moment. Not so preoccupied with all these thoughts and memories that she might as well still be in Jinx’s comfortable little house, in her bed, in her arms. Not helping.
She walked to the window and stared out over the Sacramento River. She forced her mind to the plethora of details and decisions she should be thinking about. She had a pile of work on her desk, as well as three stores she needed to visit over the next two days. She focused. The expansion in San Jose and that damned sexual harassment threat in Fresno. She had met Frank twenty years ago at the kids’ Little League tryouts and had written a letter of recommendation for him when he applied at Bad Dog. She was friends with him and his wife. There had to be an explanation. And…Penguins? Did Gwen say something about penguins? Baffled, she leafed through the papers Gwen had left. She stopped at a special request purchase order. Seventeen penguins, one with a red ski mask, and a polar bear. She strode out to Gwen’s desk, paper in hand.
“Fifteen minutes,” Taylor said, perched on the corner of Gwen’s desk. The gray pencil skirt of her business suit and her white button-up blouse indicated she had been conducting interviews all day. The missing jacket and rolled-up sleeves suggested she was done for the afternoon. She grinned at Gwen. “I win.”
“Fine.” Gwen handed her a five-dollar bill.
Confused, E. J. held out the purchase order. “What is this?”
“It’s an are-you-anywhere-on-the-planet test,” Gwen said, taking the sheet. “You failed.” Her pixie haircut complemented her delicate features. If her ears had been pointed, she would look like an elf, in all the cute ways.
“But you won me five bucks.” Taylor snapped the bill. “We had a bet on how long it would take you to notice that.”
E. J. frowned. “Don’t you have work to do?”
“You’re not my boss.” Taylor tucked her winnings into her cleavage.
“Who is these days? Someone should be keeping tabs on you.” Taylor and E. J. had started at Bad Dog at the same time and gone through their training together. They had been best friends ever since. Taylor’s career choices had taken her into personnel.
“That’s not the question. The question is what’s had you so completely gone you don’t respond to a request for penguins. Which we don’t sell, if you were wondering.”
E. J. sighed. Had it been that obvious? Apparently so, at least to the two people closest to her. “I’m sorry. I just…I don’t know.” She rubbed her forehead in an attempt to ward off a budding headache.
Without being asked, Gwen fished a small bottle of Tylenol out of her desk drawer and offered a couple to E. J. “Do you want to talk about it? We could go for ice cream.”
“I have a date,” Taylor said.
Gwen glared at her. “We could all go to Gunther’s for ice cream.” She returned her attention to E. J. “If you want to talk about it.”
E. J. took the pills and downed them with a swallow from the partial bottle of water Gwen handed her. “I met this woman.”
Gwen’s eyes rounded and her lips formed a perfect o in her “Oh no, Mr. Bill” imitation from old Saturday Night Live reruns. “A woman?” Her voice squeaked. She turned to Taylor. “You say it. She can’t fire you.”
Taylor’s expression held astonishment. “The ice queen met a woman with the power to melt her to distraction? Hold the presses.”
“Stop it.” E. J. checked to make sure no one was waiting at the bank of elevators. “I don’t want to talk about it here. I don’t know if I want to at all. There really isn’t anything to talk about. I’m not seeing her again.”
“Oh, there’s something to talk about,” Taylor said incredulously. “I’ve never known you to lose focus over a woman.”
“You have a date,” E. J. said, dismissing her.
“Forget my date. I just met her. This is too good.” Taylor smiled wickedly. “Besides, I’m only killing time dating. One of these days, Gwen’s going to dump that uptight boyfriend of hers and run away with me.”
“She’s too young for you,” E. J. said.
“I don’t discriminate.”
“I’m too good for you,” Gwen said in her own defense.
*
E. J. sat at a table in Gunther’s Ice Cream Shop, their standard location for serious talks, and waited for Taylor, who paced the sidewalk outside on the phone. Gwen had made a stop to pick up her dry cleaning. E. J. was a little uncomfortable at the assumption that this was a serious talk. It wasn’t, really. She had seen Jinx twice. Both times had been a pleasurable escape from her daily life. That’s all. There wouldn’t be another time. She just had to get her head back in the game.
E. J. watched as Gwen rounded the corner, grabbed Taylor’s phone from her hand, and walked inside.
Taylor—as planned, no doubt—hurried after her. “Hey, I wasn’t done.” Her long dark hair, clipped at her nape, flowed over one shoulder.
“You are, now. We’re here for E. J.” Gwen smiled pleasantly as she sat down across the table. She handed the phone back to Taylor, the call obviously disconnected.
E. J. smiled.
Gwen had been her admin assistant at Bad Dog since E. J. had had an admin assistant, and had moved up with her through her promotions. They worked well together, Gwen often knowing E. J.’s thoughts before E. J. did, and somewhere along the line, they had become friends. Gwen and Taylor together helped keep her on track. With one another, however, they picked and bickered and teased and sometimes downright pissed each other off. E. J. often thought they maybe should just sleep together and see if that alleviated some of the electricity between them.
“Hi, Dennis,” Taylor said to the waiter as he set down three water glasses. “I’ll have my usual.”
“Me, too,” E. J. said.
“I’m here to serve.” Dennis grinned.
Gwen paused. “Could I see a menu, please?”
“Oh, come on.” Taylor took Gwen’s purse as she handed it to her and hung it on the back of Gwen’s chair. “You know everything they have. Just order something so we can get to the good stuff. We’re here for E. J., remember?” She fluttered her lashes and mimicked Gwen’s higher tone.
“Okay. I’ll have a hot fudge brownie.”
“All right. So?” Taylor said to E. J. as Dennis moved away from the table.
E. J. hesitated. She met Taylor’s eager gaze, then Gwen’s concerned one. She knew they would want to hear different things. Taylor would want to hear where and how she met Jinx and how hot the sex was. Gwen would want to know how E. J. felt and what it was about Jinx that was so different it distracted her all day long. She was more comfortable with Taylor’s interests. She took a deep breath. “I met this woman the weekend of Jacob’s wedding.”
Taylor blinked. “The wedding? And we’re just now hearing about it?”
“Hush. Let her talk.” Gwen played with the single pearl at her throat. “We can get after her for that later.”
What next? E. J. folded the corner of her napkin. “Her name’s Jinx.”
“Like the cat?” Taylor asked.
“Or the superhero.” Gwen’s offer seemed more a suggestion than a statement.
“The superhero,” E. J. said. She softened at the memory of their banter over the names.
Gwen and Taylor exchanged glances.
“Her real name’s Michelle, but I heard only her family call her that.” E. J. thought of Tiffany and the warm greeting she had given Jinx. “She introduced herself to me as Jinx. And that’s what her friends call her.”
Taylor’s brow furrowed. “You’ve already met her family and friends?” she asked, the implication evident.
“Not the way you mean,” E. J. said. Why was this so hard? These were her besties. “She’s Tiffany’s aunt. So she’s actually part of the family…sort of.”
“Sort of?” Gwen sipped her water.
“I don’t know all the details,” E. J. said, �
�but something happened, and she isn’t welcome in the family anymore. Apparently, her sister, Tiffany’s mother, hates her. Tiffany invited her to the wedding without telling her mom.”
“Okay, that sucks for them, but what does it have to do with you?” Taylor’s cut-to-the-chase approach sometimes irritated E. J., but this time she appreciated the help staying on point.
“I met Jinx two days before the wedding in a bar, and we spent the night together.”
Gwen’s mouth dropped open. “The whole night?”
“I know,” E. J. said. “And no, I can’t tell you why I let her stay. Other than I just…” She gave a small shrug. How could she say it? It seemed so simple, and yet, it made no sense. “It just feels good to be with her.”
Taylor fell back in her chair and stared at E. J. “Man, that must have been one hell of a night.”
“It was, actually.” E. J. felt herself blush. “And so was the second one.” There. How was that for cutting to the chase?
Now, both her friends were staring at her.
“And I can’t get her out of my head. I can’t stop wondering what she’s doing. There are questions I wanted to ask her but didn’t, and now I wish I had.”
Taylor and Gwen continued to stare.
E. J. waited. “Say something,” she said finally.
Taylor narrowed her eyes. “Who are you, and where’s E. J.’s body?”
E. J. propped her elbows on the table and buried her face in her hands. “I know. That’s exactly how I feel.” She pressed her fingertips to her forehead, wondering if she had actually taken the Tylenol Gwen had given her.
“Are you going to see her again?” Gwen asked.
“No,” E. J. said firmly. She sounded confident, even to herself.
“Why not?” Gwen’s voice was softer.
E. J. sat back as Dennis set her black and tan in front of her. “Thank you.” She smiled up at him and waited for him to finish serving the others. It gave her a moment to process the question. Because I’m not looking for anything other than casual. Because I don’t have time for a relationship. Those were the reasons she used most. More specific to this case? Because my kids don’t know I’m gay, and Jinx is way too close to the situation. Because I need to be careful with Jacob due to what happened to him. She sighed and picked up her spoon. “Because it’s too complicated,” she said. “And I don’t do complicated.”
Gwen pushed her hot fudge brownie to the center of the table, and E. J. scooped the cherry off the top and ate it with a spoonful of her own whipped cream.
“It sounds like she’s different,” Gwen said, her tone conversational. “And like you felt a connection with her. It might be worth it.”
“She is different,” E. J. said, although she couldn’t figure out how the words made it out of her mouth.
“How?” Taylor still studied her.
E. J. pondered the question. She remembered that innocence she had seen in Jinx, how she had blushed in the bar, the shy way she had invited E. J. to stay at her house, how she had cried over Rex in E. J.’s arms. Have I ever cried in someone’s arms? She recalled the sparkle in Jinx’s eyes and her excitement when she had told E. J. about the shirt she liked. Her pure joy when E. J. had given it to her was like a child’s at Christmas. Then there was the heat, that slow smile that lit E. J.’s desire, the dark blue of her eyes that pulled E. J. in close, her touch, her kiss. And what about that shadow that revealed itself at certain times, the pain evident at the mention of Andrea, those scars? She was very different, different in ways that made E. J. want to know more about her.
“I don’t know.” E. J. trailed her spoon through her ice cream as she tried to formulate an answer. “I feel different when I’m with her.” She lifted her gaze to Taylor and suddenly felt foolish at what she was about to say. She shifted to Gwen. “I feel…safe…when I’m with her. But not safe from being mugged or murdered or things like that. Safe like…”
Gwen watched her with an expectant expression.
Taylor’s spoon had stopped halfway to her mouth.
“Safe like what?” Gwen’s voice was barely above a whisper.
“Never mind,” E. J. said. “Maybe it was just the wedding. My son got married, for God’s sake. And you know how weddings are. They turn the most reasonable people into blubbering romantics. And then there was her house. It reminded me of my grandparents’ house, and I got all nostalgic about that. Maybe I’m just emotional about Jacob getting married. And did I tell you Mandy’s getting more serious with Russ?”
“Is she?” Gwen asked.
“And they were at the wedding, of course.”
Gwen nodded. “So, you think you might be emotional because your kids are all grown up?”
“Wait a minute,” Taylor said. “Her house reminded you of your grandparents’ house?”
“Yes.”
“Your grandparents were broke.”
“They were not,” E. J. said defensively. “They owned their own business. It didn’t do great, but it supported their family. And they loved it.”
“You said they didn’t live in a very good part of town.”
E. J. pursed her lips. “I don’t want to get mad at you, so get to the point.”
“I was just thinking. Is this woman after your money?”
The thought alone made E. J. burst out laughing. “No,” she said after regaining control.
“How do you know?” Taylor asked.
“Let’s see. First of all, she hasn’t asked me for a thing. Second, she fed me the whole time I was there last weekend. And third, she has never once mentioned us seeing each other again or asked anything about how to stay in touch with me. I’m the one who went back looking for her. And I’m not doing that again, so you can save your gold digger worries for your next girlfriend.”
“It was just a thought,” Taylor said, sounding a little embarrassed. “You do make a lot of money.” She took a bite of her banana split. “She must have been truly outstanding in bed, to cause all this ruckus.”
Gwen shook her head. “It always comes back to that with you, doesn’t it?”
“Not always.” Taylor’s tone held a note of defiance. She turned back to E. J. “Was she?”
E. J. arched an eyebrow but didn’t answer. “I’m done with this conversation,” she said. And she was—done with it with Taylor and Gwen, and with herself. She could control her thoughts, get refocused, and forget all about Jinx. “Thank you, both, for helping me figure out that I went a little crazy over the wedding and my kids both settling down. Now, we have all this ice cream to get through, so what’s going on in your lives?”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Jinx set the reusable bag filled with groceries on the backseat of her car and climbed in behind the wheel. It’d been a good day. She’d begun early with her frequent practice of watching the sunrise, then taken a long bike ride. The schedule at work had been full, the way she liked it, and she was looking forward to vegetable stir-fry and rice for dinner. The only moment that’d given her pause had been the conversation with Reggie about starting to train as a groomer.
That’s what Reggie and Sparkle had wanted from the beginning when they’d hired her, but Jinx had felt overwhelmed when she’d gotten out. So many things were different. The world had changed so much in the years she’d been away. There was so much to learn, so much to get used to. That’d been three years ago, though, and she had learned a lot. She was managing. Maybe it was time. If not for herself, maybe for Reggie and Sparkle.
Jinx was aware they’d created the job they’d given her just for her—there were no other dog washers in the shop—and even if there had been, Jinx knew what she got paid was well above what a position like that would warrant. She was by no means wealthy—far from it. She lived in a low-income neighborhood, but she was able to live on her own and do it comfortably on what Reggie and Sparkle paid her, as long as she was careful and stuck to her budget. She didn’t need much. She was grateful for what they’d given her, and
for their offer. Maybe it was time to step it up, start training as a groomer, and pull more of her weight in exchange for everything her friends had done for her.
As she turned onto her street, she saw a car in her driveway. She stared in surprise. Not just a car, a Lexus. Not just a Lexus, E. J.’s Lexus. Her heartbeat quickened at the same time her stomach knotted. It’d taken a lot longer to stop thinking about E. J. the second time than it had the first. In all honesty, she hadn’t completely stopped thinking about her at all, but it’d taken longer to douse that ache of loneliness that gripped her each time they’d said good-bye. And it’d been harder. She didn’t know how many more times she could do it, and yet, she wanted nothing more in that moment than to see her again.
She pulled in behind E. J.’s car and turned off the engine.
E. J. sat on the front steps in black slacks and a silvery top, her arms folded over her drawn-up knees.
Jinx retrieved her groceries and looked at E. J. across the roof of the Corolla. E. J.’s expression was uncertain, but more than that, unhappy. Jinx made herself grin. “You know, the longer I live here, the packages the mailman leaves me just get better and better.”
E. J. smiled that full, bright smile that lit her face, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes today. “He just leaves you things you didn’t order?”
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