by V. Vaughn
He rolls off of me to lie on his back. “Wait. That was a test?”
I kiss his shoulder. “Um-hmm.” I’m not sure I really grasp the fact he’s not human, considering what we did was as biologically human as we could get.
But the concept of true mates is unanswered for me, so I lean up to gaze down at Bosun. “That growl I asked for? Sexy as hell. Tell me how the true mate thing between a werewolf and human works.”
He reaches up and twirls a strand of hair around his finger. “In order to create the next generation of werewolves we need human women. While I can mate with any human woman, I never have.” He drops his hand. “I guess I’m a romantic, because we only get one mate, and I wasn’t willing to settle for anyone but my true mate.”
I trace his lower lip with my index finger. “And that’s me?”
“Yes.” He nips at me. “Trust me. The way I feel about you leaves no doubt. I love you, Devon. And if you were changed, you wouldn’t question it either.”
I lean down to kiss him. Before I do, I whisper, “I believe you, because I love you too.”
***
Sometime late in the evening, we manage to eat dinner, but it is only to provide fuel for more bedroom exercise. I’m on my way home to shower and get ready for work, and I flip my visor down as the sun peeks up from the horizon in vivid shades of orange to burn through dawn. I’m deliriously happy and sing loudly to the radio.
Pillow talk last night was Bosun answering my questions about life as a werewolf. He even offered to shift for me so I could see how it works. A piece of me was afraid that might shatter my perception of reality, so I declined with a request to see it another time. While I’m sure there will be things about my relationship with a werewolf that’ll be tricky, I’m too in love to care.
My phone buzzes with a text, and I smile, imagining it’s something sweet from Bosun. I don’t check until I pull into my driveway, and I discover it’s from Katie.
“What happened last night?”
Not quite sure about the protocol for discussing these things in the human world, I text back. “Keeping the ringtone. See you soon.”
“Awesome. I have so much to tell you.”
I imagine if I didn’t have a girlfriend to share this with, I’d be bursting with things to share too. Poor Katie. It must have been hard not to be able to tell your best friend you’re in love with a werewolf. She’s right. We have so much to talk about.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
When I get to work, Katie is already there, and the aroma of dark-roast coffee wafts toward me as I walk in the door. I call out, “You’re the best friend ever!”
“And now you are.” After I slip out of my jacket and hang it up, Katie hands me a steaming mug of caffeine, and it’s hot in my hands. She says, “I’m so excited to finally be able to talk to you about my real life.”
“I can’t believe you’ve kept it a secret all this time. It must have been so hard.” We wander out into the main room of the salon.
“It was, but you can understand why I didn’t, right?”
I plop down in a chair. “Of course. The fear on Bosun’s face when he told me spoke volumes. He thought I’d run, screaming.”
“Well, you are taking it rather well.” The computer dings as she boots up the receptionist’s laptop. “But I thought you might. You’ve always been open to adventure. So tell me what happened, and don’t leave anything out.”
Heat rushes to my face. “Um, I’m going to leave some of it out.”
“Oh my God! You slept with him too?” She plops down in the chair next to me, and we both swing to face each other. “This is going to be good.”
“Okay, so you know I’d gone to his house the night before. He took me down to the water, and we heard howling. Bosun told me it was a male wolf calling his female. I jokingly howled at him, not having any idea what he really was.”
“Ah, that explains the ringtone.”
“Yeah. So last night, he mentioned the howling and how I noticed he transmits so much heat, and then he said he was a werewolf. At first I thought he was joking. But then I saw his face, and he was so afraid, and I... God, Katie, I’m so in love with this guy that all I could think was that I needed to show him I didn’t care.” I lift my cup to my mouth and grin. “So I did.” I take a sip.
“Hussy. So what do you think today?”
“I’m not sure. I asked a hundred questions last night, and I bet I’ll have a hundred more. So far, I haven’t heard anything I can’t live with.” Katie gets up and takes my mug from me to get us more coffee. As she walks toward the back room I say, “Besides, you’re happily married to one, so I figure I can be too. If it comes to that.”
Katie’s face is serious as she approaches me and hands me my cup. “Dev, I’m a werewolf too.”
My jaw drops. “What?” I scan her body quickly with my eyes, as if I’d be able to see it. “Wait. Why?”
“Because I wanted to be. At first. And then I didn’t. Which is why I ran off to college.”
“Right.” Katie came home after her freshman year and got back together with Brindle. “Oh, wow. And you couldn’t tell me.” I reach out for her hand.
“It’s okay, you were an awesome friend anyway.” She smirks at me. “For a human.”
“So why did you want to be a werewolf? Are there cool things you can do that I’m not aware of?”
“I did it because I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Brindle. Now that I know we’re true mates, I realize I had no choice.”
True mates. I recall Bosun saying we are too. “How does the true mate thing work?”
“Brindle bit me to make me a werewolf, and then once I was changed, we had to have sex to bond ourselves together for life.”
I remember how Bosun said he was obligated to mate with a human female to provide more werewolves for the pack. And that he needed to change her to make that happen. “So if you hadn’t come back, then would Brindle have eventually ended up with someone else?”
“Maybe. But when you find your true mate, nobody can compare, and he’d have been miserable.”
I wonder what will happen to Bosun and me if I never change. “So how long can you go not actually fulfilling the true-mate bond?” I try to imagine what it would be like if eventually Bosun left me to create new werewolves with someone else. But he shouldn’t have to. It’s not like he’s the only one who can have babies. Lots of people don’t have children. People. Bosun isn’t a person.
Katie tilts her head at me. “Are you...”
“Yes. We’re true mates.” I take a sip of my coffee, and the bitter flavor makes my stomach lurch.
Her face breaks out into a grin. “Devon, do you know what this means? Oh my gosh, we’re going to get to do the werewolf mommy thing together.” I offer her a smile as she goes on. “You have no idea how awesome it will be to have you at the pack meetings. All the women compete with each other over the best potluck meal, and”—she stops abruptly—“Dev, what’s wrong?”
“Does this mean I need to change if I want to spend my life with Bosun?”
“Yes.”
“What if I don’t want to be a werewolf?”
Katie reaches out to touch me, and I flinch away. She frowns as if I’ve insulted her, and I guess I probably did. “It’s not that bad. Most of the time it’s pretty fun,” Katie says.
I nod and force a small smile. “I think I need time to get used to all this.” I glance over at the clock on the wall. While it’s another fifteen minutes until my first appointment, I get up and say, “I should get ready for Andrea. You know how prompt she is.”
Katie stands too and says, “Sure. I’ll go deal with emails.”
Katie’s voice doesn’t hide her pain, and shame makes my ears burn. I grab her arm as she starts to walk away. “Hey. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that the way it sounded. You’re still my best friend, and nothing has changed between us. Okay?”
She hugs me. “Of course. You’ve got a lot to pro
cess. It’s fine.”
As she walks over to the reception area, I wonder if that’s true. Because it seems to me I have to choose between staying human and losing Bosun, or keeping him and becoming a werewolf. That’s so not fine at all.
I wander to the back room to get the perm cart set up for my client. I pull my phone out of my purse and find a text from Bosun.
“Can’t stop thinking about you. My place again tonight?”
My heart skips a beat when I think about another night in his arms. I flip my phone over and gaze at the Eiffel tower image. The plastic is slippery under my finger as I trace the design. Oh, Devon, you’ve managed to get yourself into quite the mess.
My logic kicks in. I have no intention of becoming a werewolf, and continuing a doomed relationship is a bad idea. Bosun told me that it’s his duty to provide children to ensure the future of the pack. Our relationship will only keep him from his obligation.
I text him back. “I’m exhausted and need time to think. Rain check?”
Because now it is time for me to do the right thing. Even if it means breaking my heart. A single tear falls on my phone and makes Bosun’s reply blurry. “I understand. Call me tonight? I love you.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
After two days of avoiding Bosun, I know I have to face him. Katie’s been great and says she’ll support whatever I decide, but I know she hopes I’ll become a werewolf too. The thing is, no matter how hard I try to convince myself it would be wonderful, I can’t.
All my life, I couldn’t wait to get out of Winter Valley. I used to laugh at the girls who said the same thing and then ended up married and pregnant before they could go. I want adventure in Paris or London—anywhere else but here.
I enter Lindholm Auto Repair and wave at the camera. Bosun comes from the back, wiping his hands on a rag, and I stare at the fingers my body craves. The oily odor of gasoline comes with him, and he gazes at me as if he doesn’t dare to touch me.
I say, “Hey.”
“Hi.” The moment his voice rumbles through me, tears fill my eyes. How am I supposed to live without this man?
I blink them back but don’t do a very good job, because Bosun lifts my chin and says, “Sweetheart, whatever it is, let me fix it.”
I shake my head slowly and let the sobs come. He pulls me against his chest, and the anguish I’ve felt for the last forty-eight hours pours out of me. I inhale the scent of my true mate and let it soothe me, even though this will be the last time.
When I manage to get past the bawling stage and start to hiccup, Bosun leads me to the back room and out of the way of any customers who might come in. He directs me to an office chair and drops to his knees to place himself between my legs. The warmth of his palms sears through the fabric of my skirt. “Talk to me.”
I lift a strand of hair from his eyes and move it out of the way. “I love you so much more than I knew was possible.”
“I know what you mean—I feel the same way.”
I place my index finger on his lips to quiet him, and my tongue longs to taste them. “But I can’t be what you need.”
Bosun shakes he head. “No. I’m not asking you to change for me.”
“I know. But Katie explained that you have a duty to the pack to produce children.”
“Devon, we don’t have to think about that. I’ve got plenty of time to fill that obligation.”
“I also know how true mates work, Bosun. The longer we stay together, the harder it will be when you have to leave me.” My throat gets thick, and fresh tears roll down my cheeks. “I can hardly bear doing it after a couple of days.” I sniff and clear my throat. “How will I let you go months or years from now?”
Bosun’s eyes are glassy as he stands. “So this is it? You’re just going to go back to the way life was before we met?”
“No. I’m going to move to Paris.” A muscle along his jaw jumps, and he takes a slow breath as I continue. “That way I won’t be around to bump into you and cause you any more pain than necessary.”
Bosun avoids my gaze and feigns a sudden interest in the wrenches on the counter. “Paris. Right.” I imagine he’s recalling my phone case that says “Fall in love with me in Paris” and teasing me about it. “When are you leaving?”
“I’m not sure. In a couple weeks, when I get everything settled with my shop. I called a friend from school who works in a salon there. She’s going to get me a job and let me crash with her until I can find a place to live.”
We never did settle my bill, so I stand as I say, “About my car—”
I stop talking when I notice anger flash in Bosun’s eyes. He clenches his fists.
“Okay, sorry.” I bite my lip. “Thank you. I’m going to go.”
My heels click on the concrete like a time bomb as I make my way to the lobby. When I pull the front door open, I jump at the crash of something behind me, and a string of profanity follows. I run to my car to slam my door, and I fall apart.
Surprisingly, I manage to make it home without an accident, even if driving while I cry is a bit like being in the rain without wipers. Fortunately, when I climb into bed, the exhaustion of little sleep for three days and my emotional state let me rest.
But while I do doze off, it is fitful. My dreams alternate between the pain in Bosun’s eyes to my imagined torture of turning into a werewolf. I untangle my legs from my sheets and force myself out of bed. Today is about to get much worse as I tell my best friend I’m leaving and putting her out of a job in the process.
I make it to work before Katie and have the coffee ready for her when she arrives. While I haven’t had an appetite in days, I know how much my friend loves pastries, and I stop by a bakery on my way. I lift a jelly donut and hold it out to her when she comes in the back room.
“Donuts? Is this a good sign or a bad one?”
I grimace as if she’s going to hit me. “A bad one. I’m sorry, but I’ve decided I really am going to move to Paris.”
Katie stares at me and takes a bite of her treat. Bright-red jam oozes out, and a blob splatters on the floor. “Shit.” She stoops down to wipe it with her napkin.
I sigh. “I think it’s best for Bosun if I’m not around to remind him of us. So I have a business realtor coming today to figure out if she can sell this place as is, or if I’m going to do it piecemeal.”
“Wow. That was fast.”
“Yeah. I think it’s for the best. I’ve already got a job and place to stay lined up. So the sooner I can go, the better.” My eyes tear up, and I will them to stay put. “For everyone.”
“Not for me.” Sugar is on her chin, and I reach over to brush it off as she says, “I’m going to miss you so much. You better text me everything.”
“You’re not mad at me for breaking Bosun’s heart? And not joining the pack with you?”
Katie huffs. “I can’t be. I’m the one who took off for a year because I couldn’t face being a werewolf, remember?” She reaches for another donut. “I get it. Go have your adventure and find your sexy Frenchman. If being with Bosun is meant to happen, you’ll come back. And if not changing can let you escape the true-mate bond, then good for you.”
“Do you think it works that way?” My heart sinks as I imagine that I could actually fall out of love with Bosun.
“No, I’m positive it doesn’t. But I know why you have to go.”
She does, because she tried it too. “You know you’re the best friend in the world, right?”
“Yup. And don’t you forget that when you’re looking for my birthday present.”
I pull my friend into a hug. “Thanks.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
My apartment has a small front porch that is big enough for a chair and a tiny side table. The wicker creaks as I sit. After a depressing day at work that left me with the decision to put my whole shop in storage rather than trying to sell it, I crave a drink and fresh air. Hell, more than one drink. I glance at the bottle I brought along with my glass as I reach for my wine. Whil
e the sun has set, the heat of an unusually warm day is still present, and I gaze out at the woods. The low hum of traffic is in the distance, and peepers are singing. Occasionally, a truck changing gears rises above it all to distract me.
I sip the tart flavor of my sauvignon blanc and recall the soothing sound of water lapping at Bosun’s deck and how it felt to be in his arms. Blinking back the burn of tears, I think about how it serves me right to finally fall in love and have it crush me like a bug. There’s a long list of ex-boyfriends who would probably cheer if they knew Devon Reilly finally got hers.
Liquid splashes in my glass as I refill it. I take a large swig and close my eyes to envision a sexy Frenchman. I can’t quite grasp the face I used to see, because images of Bosun are superimposed over it. Damn it. Snapping my eyes open, I take another swig of my drink and work on another fantasy. I practice my rudimentary French as I imagine sitting in a cafe and flirting with the waiter. “Garçon!” But I can’t remember any more, so I follow it up with “Brie, champagne, lingerie.” I giggle at myself, but my laugh turns to tears.
I gulp down more wine, hoping it will stop my crying. As the alcohol burns its way down my throat, I tilt my head back and let out a howl. The release of my pain is soothing, and I continue with a few more. I’m sure my neighbors are wondering what the hell is going on, so I stop before Myrtle calls the police.
When I do, I hear a real wolf howl. The sound is deep and resonant as it reaches into me and grips my heart. I whisper. “Keep calling. She’ll answer.” But when the male’s call doesn’t get a reply, I decide to howl again in sympathy.
This time the wolf’s howl is closer, and I wonder if maybe I’m imagining it. I lift my wine glass for another sip and mumble to myself, “This is going to suck in the morning.” And I finish the contents.
My goblet thumps on my tiny table, and I notice a pair of eyes glowing in the woods. I’ve seen them before, and now that I know wolves aren’t interested in harming humans, I decide to investigate. After all that’s happened, I still haven’t seen a wolf up close. I climb awkwardly down the stairs in my inebriated state to make my way across the road.