by Renee Carr
She looked around the room and shrugged. “You want a drink?”
I stared at her for a second and then moved forward, cradling her face in the palms of my hands. I scooted toward her on the couch, staring deeply into her eyes. I could hear a slight whimper escape her chest as I leaned in and pressed my lips against hers. She tasted like honey and alcohol, and instantly I wanted more. The heat erupted between the two of us, something that I knew had been there all night long. Her hand slid up my sides, and the beating of my heart knocked the wind out of me. This girl was literally taking my breath away.
She crawled toward me, biting her lip, as she gripped the back of the couch and pulled herself up into my lap, her legs wrapped around my waist. My fingers inched up the bare skin beneath her shirt, feeling how warm her body was. Suddenly, that heat that was between us was surging through my entire body. I felt like an animal, like I couldn’t get enough of her, like I wanted to throw her down and take her right there on the floor. It was unlike any feeling I ever had before. My breath picked up and I could feel a trickle of sweat roll down my neck.
After a few moments, though, my breathlessness grew and it was beginning to become painful. Lily leaned back and looked me in the face. “Are you okay? Your skin is so warm and you’re breathing like you just ran a marathon.”
I lifted her up and off of me, barely even thinking about what she was saying. My body was revolting against me, something inside of me feeling like it was bursting to get out. It was a mixture of anxiety and nausea, twisted together with pain that just surged through my chest and bones. I put my hand to my heart and walked across the room, pacing back and forth. “I don’t know, I don’t know what’s wrong. I just feel so strange.”
My vision began to grow blurry and I rubbed my eyes, trying to fix it. The twisting of my knuckles against my eyes only made it worse, which in turn exacerbated the anxiety flooding through me. Unable to even tell what was going on at that moment, I fell to my knees on the floor.
My breathing was so heavy, it sounded like panting. But as I attempted to focus in on it, to control it, I realized that it wasn’t my breathing at all. It was as if there were something inside of me, something I could hear breathing like a dog. Just then, pain arced through my back and I bent my body backward, groaning in pain. I could hear Lily, but it sounded like she was so far away from me. It was like I was standing at the end of a tunnel and she was on the other side. The pain I’d been feeling before was nothing compared to what suddenly had begun throbbing through my head, shoulders, and seemingly every muscle in my body.
I couldn’t control myself—my body twisted and contorted, arcing and falling over and over again. I wanted to stop, but I couldn’t. All I could do was let it progress as I fearfully hoped it would end soon. I wasn’t sure how much more of the pain I could take. Suddenly, with the crack of my bones and one last enormous jolt of pain, my body fell to the ground and my eyes closed.
All the sounds that had been muffled began to take shape again, only they sounded so much clearer and brighter than anything I’d heard before. My eyes were clenched shut, but my hearing was so acute, it was almost as if I could envision what I was seeing. I smacked my lips together, but something wasn’t right. My entire body felt like someone else’s. Suddenly, the sound of a howl just like the ones I had heard in the woods earlier that day jolted me from my thoughts.
I tried to stand up, but as I did, I was no longer relying on muscular legs to lift me up. My eyes opened and wildly looked around, finding four furry, shaking wolf legs beneath me. The fear blew through me just as the sound of the howl did. I immediately realized that I wasn’t hearing an intruder or a wolf from earlier that day—it was me. I was standing in Lily’s living room, wobbling all over the place, panting and slobbering, howling.
My head was a mess, and I turned this way and that, trying to get my bearings. I felt like me, but I also felt like something else, something primal. As my feet slipped and skidded across the wood floors, my eyes met Lily’s. She stood in the doorway to the living room, watching me, her eyes wide but her stance not fearful at all. As soon as my eyes met hers, my heart began to slow, and a comfort surged through me.
I let my legs topple beneath me and I whimpered as my head lay down softly on the wood floor. I had no idea what was going to come next, but whatever was going on, I wasn’t going to let it be the end of me.
8
Lily
I had let my mind cloud my judgment, not seeing the signs at all. I stood there in the doorway of my living room, watching this handsome and breathtaking man cowering on the floor in pain. His bones cracked and his muscles strained as his clothes ripped to shreds across his broad wolf chest. I grimaced as his jowls hit the wood floor, slobber leaking out in a pool beneath him. I stood there, unable to move from my spot. I wasn’t sure if I was shocked, in disbelief, or scared, but I didn’t dare get much closer to him, not until I could figure out what exactly he was thinking.
His ears perked, but I stayed put as his muscles ended the change, forming a magnificent beast with long, flowing, brown and silver fur, and a body just as big and strong as a wolf as Brighton was as a man. I took a very slow step backward, not knowing at all what to expect or where to even go. His mouth opened, his shimmering fangs tucked behind the fur of his snout.
The wolf’s nose twitched, taking in a long, deep breath as his snout opened and a loud, vibrating howl came screaming out of him. Just as soon as the sound left his wolf body, his eyes opened wide and he scrambled, trying to get to his feet. I watched the recognition move over him as he studied the legs that held him up and the fur that kept him warm. Not long after that recognition, though, came the fear. He began to whimper and whine, his claws sliding back and forth across the slick floor, ripping tendrils of wood from the grains.
When his eyes finally met mine, he slowed, his breathing getting calmer and his body collapsing to the floor. There was a comfort in our closeness, and I could tell that there was something about it that calmed that primal instinct inside of him. I turned and inched my way back into the hallway, moving around the corner before taking off toward the kitchen. I opened up the fridge, trying to find something for him to eat, but the majority of what was in there was either vegetable or fruit.
Luckily, though, I wasn’t the only one that had put food in the refrigerator. My grandmother had dropped off some groceries at the house before I had moved in, putting the things she knew I liked as a kid on the shelves. While I wasn’t very fond of hotdogs as an adult, I had been known as a child to eat more than my fair share. Sitting on the shelf, the package of hotdogs was pretty much all I could offer him.
Rolling my eyes, I grabbed the food and hurried back out to the living room door. The wolf still lay on the floor, and the only thing moving was his tail as I came back into the room. His eyes looked so sad as if he were lost. My heart instantly went out to him, despite the strangeness that that evening had turned into. I needed to do something to help him. To help ease the pain, to help clear his mind, and to help turn him back into his human form.
The one thing I did know about wolves was that they were ravenous when it came to food. Wolves had very high metabolisms, and they used that nourishment to build even more strength and power within their bodies. Taking a deep breath, I knelt down on one knee, keeping a safe distance for the moment. I opened up the package and pulled a hotdog out, holding it out in front of me, willing Brighton, or the wolf, to see the hunger inside of it.
A wild animal’s hunger was always stronger than its basic instinct of fight or flight. I could tell from the way his nose was curling, and his eyes shifted back and forth, that the smell of food was taunting him. Very slowly, he lifted his head, his eyes moving from the hotdog to my face, and back to the food again. His legs, tired and weak, trembled as he raised himself up on all fours.
“It’s alright, come eat this and I promise you’ll feel better,” I said to him as calmly as possible.
He paused at the soun
d of my voice, and I wondered if he could feel the intense connection that I was feeling. He whimpered his way over to me and took the hotdog gently from my fingers, chomping it quickly. When that one was done, I fed him another, and another, until the entire package was gone. He lay down, facing me, his nose just barely touching my leg. Carefully, I reached out and began to pet the top of his head, humming like my mother used to do when I was scared. As the music vibrated through both our chests, his body once again twisted and turned, only this time it wasn’t as violent.
I kept my hand on the top of his head, watching him until finally the wolf was gone, and Brighton lay in front of me, curled in a ball, completely naked and exhausted. Steam rose from his skin as the wolf descended back inside of him. He began to shiver, his arms clutched around his body, his knees pulled nearly to his chest. I hurried to my feet and over to the couch, grabbing the throw and tossing it over him. Bending down next to him, I ran my hands up and down his arms, trying to warm him the best that I could.
After several minutes, he started to relax, and his eyes opened, looking over at me. “Do you think you can stand? Just long enough for me to help you get to the couch?”
Brighton’s eyes blinked at me, and he glanced over at the couch and nodded. I put my hand underneath his arm and helped pull him into a sitting position. From there, he managed to get himself to his feet and over to the couch, plopping down in the middle and leaning back with his head hanging backward. I brought the blanket over and laid it over top of him, brushing my hand across his forehead, which was matted with sweat and wolf hair.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
I shook my head. “There’s nothing to be sorry about.”
He chuckled weakly. “I bet you didn’t think this would be how your night ended.”
I smiled, looking down at my hands. As my eyes shifted downward, I caught a glimpse of the cuts on both his arms and his thigh. I grabbed his arm and looked at it, bringing it to my nose and taking a sniff. “Did you get these today?”
He slowly lifted his head and looked down at his arm with bewilderment. “I did, but they’re almost completely healed. How’s that possible?”
I bit the inside of my lip, not knowing exactly how much I should say and what I should tell him. “Wolves heal faster than normal humans.”
Brighton’s eyes slowly shifted up toward mine, and he tilted his head to the side. “How do you know that? And why are you so calm? I literally just changed into a wild animal in your living room. That’s the kind of situation that definitely screams bad date.”
I reached out and touched his hand, feeling just as drawn to him as I was before, only now it was more of a caring feeling than a lustful one. “Are you thirsty?”
Brighton reached up and touched his throat, nodding his head. “Now that you mention it, I’m dying of thirst.”
I took that moment to excuse myself, hurrying off into the kitchen to get him water, and give myself just a moment to think about my response. He was right, I should have been freaking out, I should’ve been running in the opposite direction, but I knew he needed me. I could sense it even when we weren’t touching.
After gathering my thoughts, I walked back out to the living room with a pitcher of water, knowing full well a glass wouldn’t be enough. His eyes went big and he reached for it before I had even gotten close. A chuckle escaped my chest as I handed it over, watching him gulp it down, a stream of water running down his chin. When he finally came back up for air, he seemed to already be feeling a little bit better.
“I guess I should tell you, you’re not the only wolf that I’ve ever met,” I said, holding my breath for his response.
He stared at me for a moment, flashes of gold vibrating around his irises. “I was in the woods today. My brother said they were meeting at the spot where we used to camp, and I was curious. I had overheard them at my dad’s house earlier, and they had been acting really strange for a long time now. When I got there, there were a bunch of men, but twenty seconds later they had all turned into wolves. It scared me, so I tried to get away but they heard me and they ran me down. One of them cut me on my arm and my leg before another one threw him off of me.”
I stood up and walked over to the window, my fingers to my lips. I stared out at the dark street, the tall lamp flickering against the asphalt. Whirling around, I tried to keep calm. “Were they dark? Was their fur dark?”
He shook his head. “No, they looked like regular wolves, only much larger.”
I tapped my fingers to my lips, trying to put together Brighton’s last 24 hours. “And your brothers? Were they wolves too?”
“That’s what it looked like,” he replied. “And I guess it would explain why they are always beat up. From what it sounded like, they were meeting in that spot for the first time. Something had scared them away from where they originally were, I guess.”
Turning back toward the window, I tried to steady my heartbeat. From what Brighton was saying, it wasn’t just his brothers or one or two wolves with them, there was an entire pack. The sound of Brighton clearing his throat behind me brought me out of my thoughts, reminding me that at that moment, what I needed to do was focus on him. Brighton studied me, now looking at me as if I was unknown territory. “Are you going to tell me how you know so much about this?”
I let my shoulders relax and shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. I just know a lot about wolves in general. I’ve seen this before so I know it exists. I’m just trying to use that knowledge to help you in the best way that I can. Right now, though, your body has been through something very traumatic and you desperately need to rest.”
He smacked his lips together, wriggling his nose. “Why does my mouth taste like hotdogs?”
I covered my mouth, trying not to laugh, but I couldn’t help it. “You don’t remember that part? It was how I got you to calm down. You ate an entire package of hotdogs.”
His face snarled and his shoulder shivered. “I’ve always hated hotdogs.”
I walked over and gently sat next to him, taking his hand in mine. “I’m sorry this is happening to you. It did not look comfortable at all.”
Brighton stared at me as though he was surprised by my sympathy toward him. “I do need to rest, but as soon as my strength is back, I have to find out what’s going on. It felt like the wolf was ripping me apart, and I’ll be honest, I don’t know if I can survive it again.”
What he didn’t know was that there were a lot more painful things lurking in the woods, waiting for him, waiting for all of us.
9
Brighton
“Are you sure about this?” I asked as Lily walked beside me, her arm around my waist, helping me up the stairs.
Her brow creased and she nodded her head. “Of course I am. I don’t think I’m going to sleep very much tonight. I want to keep an eye on you and make sure that nothing happens while you sleep. There’s no point in you sleeping on the uncomfortable couch or the floor in one of the empty rooms when there’s a perfectly good bed sitting right here. In fact, no one has slept in it yet. You will be the first one.”
I grinned. “Is that like marking my territory?”
She rolled her eyes and pushed on the door, helping me through. “You better not be marking your territory anywhere in this house or I’ll hit you on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.”
We both laughed as I plopped down on the bed, watching her as she leaned down and lifted my feet up. As soon as I saw my toes wiggle, I realized that I was completely naked. I wasn’t sure how I missed it up to that point. My cheeks blushed, and she glanced over at me. “Don’t worry, I covered you with a blanket when you turned back into your human and I didn’t see too much of what you had going on.”
I pulled the blanket up and tried to keep my cool. “Good, it’ll still be a surprise.”
She shook her head with a chuckle. “Okay, Casanova, get some sleep. We’ll have some breakfast in the morning. If you need anything, just call for me. This is a smal
l house, I’ll hear you.”
Before she could walk away, I reached up and grabbed her wrist. “In all seriousness, thank you. Of all the people I could be around when this happened, I can’t imagine… yeah, I just mean, thank you.”
She gave me a sweet smile and headed out of the room, glancing back over her shoulder as she carefully shut the door. I rolled my eyes at myself, never having found myself so tongue-tied around a girl before. “Good job, Brighton, try to act like as big of an idiot as you possibly can.”
I turned over in the bed and curled up with the blankets and pillows, staring out the window in front of me. My body began to relax, and almost instantly I could feel the exhaustion rolling over me like waves. The moon outside the window became blurry, and before I knew it, I was fast asleep.
Dreams filled my night, ones of me running through the forest, ones of me running away from the wolves, and some with me just sitting there, staring at my own wolf sitting in front of me. We were two different entities, but when I ran in my dreams, I felt as if we had meshed and melded together into one. It was a spiritual connection that I had never experienced, not that I had experienced very many spiritual connections before. At least in my dreams, the pain didn’t exist.
“Brighton,” Lily whispered, gently nudging my arm. “I don’t mean to wake you, but your phone’s been going off like crazy and I figured even though we went through something wild last night, I probably shouldn’t answer it.”
When I breathed in deeply, waking myself up, I could smell the sweet fragrance of Lily’s body wash. But even deeper than that, I could smell the fresh scent of her skin. My lips, without thinking about it, curled into a smile and I turned over, opening my eyes wide to see her beautiful face. Her cheeks blushed at how I looked at her, and she giggled, looking down at her hands.