by Cat Porter
“Did Caitlyn cook?”
“Caitlyn? Nah, not really. She’d experiment sometimes, try out recipes, but nine times out of ten, they wouldn’t turn out right.”
“Would you give her shit for it?”
I shot her a look. “Hell no. Big deal. She tried, always gave it her all. We’d end up making a sandwich or some eggs and call it a day or go out if we had the cash.”
A shadow crossed Tania’s face and then faded.
“What is it?”
She stabbed at a potato with her fork. “Nothing,” she murmured.
“Baby, tell me.”
Her gaze remained on her food. “You were a good husband.”
“I don’t know. I tried.” I touched her leg with mine under the table. “What is it? Tania, tell me.”
She put down her fork and ran her tongue across her lips. “If I ever had a fail in the kitchen, Kyle would let me know in precise detail where I had gone wrong. Flavor, texture, salt level—wherever I had missed the mark. He’d point out what I should have done, what I obviously had not done. He’d shake his head and push the food around his plate or chew on a forkful, like he was a martyr enduring some form of torture. Then, eventually, he’d declare it was unfit for his consumption. We’d argue, and sometimes, he’d even leave the table. I’d lose my appetite and end up giving it all to the neighbor’s dog or throw it away before cleaning everything all up.” She took in a deep breath and slowly let it out.
“Baby—”
She shook her head and swallowed, her eyes remaining on her dish.
That motherfucker.
I wanted to erase that humiliation that was morphing her beautiful face, stiffening her shoulders, streaking her soul. I wanted to obliterate all the negative clouds that fucker had put behind her eyes, the fractures he had created in her heart. The doubts, the mean, the negligence he had singed her soul with.
Here was one of the smartest, most beautiful women I had ever met, and she was shouldering and hiding a mountain of false bullshit that he had molded especially for her. For what? For his own goddamn ego, that was what.
Fuck no.
I slid my leg against hers. “You want my secret roast chicken recipe?” I asked, my voice gentle.
Her face tilted up, the corner of her mouth tugging upward.
Smile, Scarlett. For fuck’s sake, I’m gonna put that smile that’s connected to that big heart back on your face if it’s the last thing I do.
I sliced through a potato wedge. “The recipe is from the Italian lady’s television show. I forget her name now. Want to hear it?”
Tania nodded, her lips rolling, her brows still drawn together. “Sure.”
“You take butter and garlic, some fresh thyme leaves, some rosemary, grated lemon rind, coarse sea salt, pepper. You mash all that together in one of those pounding things.” I gestured with my hand.
“A mortar and pestle?”
“Yeah, that’s it, or you could use some mini blender chopper thingy. Anyway, you mash all that together until it’s a thick paste. Add Dijon mustard, lemon juice, and olive oil, then, you slather it all over your bird, both under and over the skin. Especially under the skin, in all those hidden little places. Then, you pour more lemon juice and olive oil over the chicken and the potatoes. In the oven it all goes for about two and a half hours. Mid-way, you turn the bird over, and that’s it. Done.”
She stared at me, her jaw slack.
“What is it?”
“I think I could listen to you describe recipes all day. That growly, husky voice of yours, coupled with all that enthusiasm.”
“Huh.”
She smiled at me, the tension gone from her beautiful face, and my muscles relaxed. “You did a great job on the bird. It’s incredibly good. Really flavorful. I’ll be making it.”
“Do I get an invite when you do?”
“If you’d like to meet Rae, sure.”
“I’d like to meet your mom. Boner knows your mom, right? Of course he does.”
“Boner’s the new son-in-law.”
“Maybe you should get two big birds and have your sister and her hubs, and Jill and Boner over, too, and then we can get the formal intro done that way.”
She stared at me, her fork midair.
“What is it?”
She remained perfectly still. “You want to come over to my house and meet my mother over dinner, a family dinner?”
“I’ve met your sister and her husband at your store parties. And I’d prefer Boner and Jill to Catch and Nina at the moment, don’t you think? We’ll leave that for another time.”
The silent stare remained.
“Unless you think this chicken isn’t worthy of meeting your mom?”
“Oh, it’s plenty worthy.” She slid dark meat onto her fork.
“You should get those Yukon Gold potatoes, too. Boner will flip over those. Guaranteed he has no idea about the different kinds of potato out there.”
“Those purply blue potatoes would really freak him out, don’t you think?” Tania laughed, and something brightened in my chest.
We finished eating and cleaned up the kitchen together.
I ran my fingers through the back of her hair, the soft silk sliding over my fingers. “Do you have to get home?”
“No. Jill and Becca are spending the night since Boner’s out of town. If you need to get sleep though, I’ll go.” She sat up and moved forward on the couch.
“No, no.” My hand landed on her back. “Stay with me tonight?”
We hadn’t been together since I’d gotten hospitalized. If I had to spell shit out for her, I would do it. To be clear. Clear as light through a fucking diamond.
“I want you to stay with me tonight. I’ve missed you. And I have an appetite for you that is not satisfied.”
Her dark eyes lit up.
I kissed those lips. “Needs feeding, babe.” I stroked her tongue with mine. “Needs satisfying.”
“Oh…”
“Could we make a dent in that, you think?”
“Yes, we certainly could. Did you ask the doctor, though?”
“I did. He gave me the green light.”
My thumb stroked the side of her throat, and her eyes fluttered. I laid kisses across her jaw.
She let out a soft cry.
I let go of her and went into the living room and made myself comfortable on the sofa, my eyes never leaving her dreamy ones.
“Strip.”
Her eyes popped open. She pulled off her socks and tugged off her fancy T-shirt. She undid her jeans, shoving them down those sexy legs of hers. Holding my eyes, she unhooked her bra and slid it off her body, releasing those small but firm, round breasts. My mouth dried as she tucked her fingers in either side of her panties.
“Slowly.” My voice rasped.
She tugged them down her legs very slowly, stepping out of them.
She kicked the panties from her ankle, and I shook my head at her as I stretched out my hand. She cocked an eyebrow and leaned over, snatched up her scrap of underwear, and handed it to me. I grinned, holding the damp satiny material in my hand, taking in the heady fragrance of her. Her lust, her desire for me. She blushed, her lips parting. I hung the flimsy underwear on the headstock of my guitar, which stood against the wall at my side. Tania released another low moan at the sight. I gestured for her to come close. She did, standing in front of me.
I held her gaze as my hand slid between her legs and my fingers grazed her very wet sweet spot. She gasped. I held her thighs apart and slowly licked her, my tongue teasing her clit.
Her fingers sank into my hair. “Butler!”
I wanted her to use me.
“Fuck my face, baby.” I pressed the tops of my teeth just above her clit, giving her a hard point of resistance. She groaned and whimpered as she ground her hips into my face. My fingers dug into her full ass as she chased her orgasm.
Fuck yeah.
She came, and I lapped at her quivering flesh, holding her close.
>
“Tania.”
Her dazed eyes found mine.
“Go to my bedroom and wait for me on the bed.”
Her skin flushed, and she stepped back and strode off into the darkness of my room, the curves of her fantastic ass highlighted by the light we’d left on in the kitchen.
Taking in a deep breath, I ran a hand down my chest. My heart was racing like I was about to lose my virginity. Only that time was a forgettable and pathetic five minutes under the bleachers after football practice. This, however, felt like a game changer. Every time with Tania felt like a new adventure. A step in a new direction.
She wanted to be with me. She knew the risks, and she still wanted me.
My balls tightened. I squeezed my eyes shut, taking in another breath.
I went into the dark bedroom. Her short, choppy breathing was the only sound in the room.
Tania sat on the edge of the bed, her arms taut, her legs pressed together. An actual shiver raced over the back of my neck as I opened my dresser drawer where I kept my bandanas.
No, give her the one you used today. Let her smell you, feel you.
My hand found the twisted cotton lying on top of the dresser, and I grabbed it.
I approached her without saying a word, and I slid the bandana over her eyes. She let out a tiny gasp as I tied it behind her head.
“Butler—”
“Shh…” I ran my hands through her thick mass of dark hair. So dark, it was black, true black. My exotic queen.
She let out a soft moan, her head relaxing under my lazy strokes. I wanted to take my time with her.
Yes, it was good to be sober to drink it all in.
Drink her in.
My fingers tickled down her shoulders, her arms, and to her tits. She whimpered as I softly palmed them and squeezed them hard, demanding her attention. Her head shot up, her lips tensed.
My knee nudged her legs apart as I slid a thumb in her mouth, and she sucked on me, making those little sounds from the back of her throat. My cock throbbed in my jeans, my brain misfiring into that intensely happy place of fuck yes.
This was anticipation. This was bursting flavors. This was smooth brandy. Expensive whiskey. A gourmet fucking five star meal.
I popped my thumb out of her mouth, and she let out an incredible cry. Want. Need.
I got down on my knees and slid my hands up her thighs, my wet thumb stroked up her slit and swirling around her clit. Her head fell back once more, and she moaned.
“You’re beautiful,” I whispered against her tits, taking a tip in my mouth, grazing it with my teeth.
She flinched, and I laved her hard nipple with my tongue.
“You’re perfect, Tan.” I caressed her throat with my lips.
My hands slid down over her hips, and I pulled them forward. I leaned down and blew air over her pussy, and her pelvis arched up.
“You want me, Scarlett? You want what you know I can give you, don’t you?”
“Yes, yes—”
“I want to give it to you, baby. Everything you’ve ever wanted. Everything you need.” I pushed her back against the mattress.
She squirmed on the bed, her hands in tight little fists over her head.
I licked her pussy, toyed with her clit, my thumbs pulling her lips apart, giving me full access to every slick little inch. She was a diamond to be adored. My diamond. My black diamond. She tensed, her legs squeezing my sides.
“Easy.” I splayed a hand over the cool skin of her hip. “Open wide for me and stay that way, sweetheart.”
She did as she’d been told. Wrapping one hand around her quivering thigh, I buried my face between her legs and sucked on her smooth flesh. She moaned out loud, and that raw sound coursed through my veins. My head split open under a blaze of heat. I wanted to give to Tania. Simply give. My fingers pressed into her body, keeping her under me.
“Butler! Stop, please! I’m too sensitive.” She twisted in my hold. “It’s too much.”
“You haven’t seen too much yet. This is where it gets good, baby,” I insisted with more subtle licks and lashes. I persuaded her with harsher strokes and deeper sucks, sending her over the edge again. She chanted words and sounds, her chest heaving, her arms limp at her sides.
My dick banged against my jeans, and I got up off the bed, ripped them off, then my shirt. I grabbed a condom from my end table, suited up, and went back to her.
I kneeled on the bed, pulled her close, gripped her thighs, and, bending her legs, I spread them wide. I brought my cock to her entrance. “I’m gonna fuck that beautiful pussy that I made so wet, and you’re going to fuck me right back. You got that, Scarlett?”
“Yes,” she breathed.
I drove inside her. My hungry, desperate cock found its hungry, desperate, and very slick target.
“Butler!”
I pulled out and drove in deeper. “Oh shit, Tan…”
She stretched around me. Her body stilled and then her pelvis rose up to meet me as she let out a low moan.
I fucked Tania. I fucked through the ache and the yearning for her that I’d stashed deep inside myself all this time. I fucked the disappointments from her memories. I fucked the doubts and the pain she still fed like stray dogs, and I fucked those dogs into a corner and stared them down.
I fucked through my own strays.
For both of us.
This was an honesty that wasn’t anxious or shaded with denial or had subclauses attached to it for a later date, just in case. I didn’t shrink from it like I would a cold blast of frozen winter air on the plains. This honesty only made something inside me pliant, stronger, brighter.
Fucking her now wasn’t only about getting us both off, about forgetting or feeling better for a brief moment. With every thrust, I wanted to feel her happiness unfurl around us and keep us both high.
Planting her feet in the mattress behind my legs, she lifted herself up on her arms and quickened our pace, meeting me thrust for thrust.
Fuck yes.
I wanted to show her that she was that glorious woman she craved to be.
I wanted to show her I could be the man she saw, the man reflected back at me in her gorgeous dark chocolate eyes.
I ripped the bandana off of her. Her eyes sought mine.
My Scarlett.
I could trust her, believe in her, as she’d asked me to. It scared the fuck out of me, but I wanted this more than that fear—the fear of losing her, not living up to her, not deserving her, the fear of dying on her. Maybe I had to ride that thin line to get to the other side, to be the man a woman like her could believe in.
“What do you believe in?” asked that voice from my past once more.
I believe in this. In us.
Yes, I could be that man. I could.
“Baby,” she rasped, her lips parted, her eyes on fire, her body fucking mine, one with mine.
I am.
“GRACE?”
She grinned at me, a pen in her mouth. “Tania?”
I leaned over her desk in the office of Eagle Wings. “I need new boots.”
A grin split her face. She was the one for the job. “Oh?”
“Special boots.”
“Intriguing.” She put a stack of work orders in a folder and handed the folder to Tricky, who stood waiting. “What kind of special exactly?”
I leaned in closer, glancing at Tricky, who ambled into the hallway, going through the folder. “Special fuck-me-now boots,” I whispered.
Her eyes widened. “Very, very intriguing. More intriguing than expected.”
I laughed.
“Western or high fashion?”
“More high fashion.”
“Then, unfortunately, Pepper’s is out,” Grace said, referring to Meager’s very own western boot store, that blessedly had survived all these years. We’d been fans since our youth, as had our parents, and their parents before them.
“Shame, but yes. Not Pepper’s. Where else?”
“A snazzy new boutique
opened in Rapid last month with brands from LA. We’ll go there. It’ll cost you though.”
“Worth the investment.”
“Hmm.” She folded her hands together across her desk, her back straightening. “And tell me, Ms. Reigert, may I ask what you’re hoping to gain with this investment, specifically?”
“I need to show my appreciation for a very important contract, Mrs. LeBeau.”
“Aha!”
“And something else.”
“Yes? Yes?”
“I’d like to see Ronny, the tattoo master.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. I have an idea I’d like to run by him, see what he thinks. And then I’ll make an appointment for another time.”
A grin lit her face. “I’ll put in a call now.” Grace picked up her cell phone from her desk and tapped on the screen.
“And one more thing—”
Her hazel eyes darted up at me.
“The necklace you had made for Lock—the skeleton key? I need to see that jeweler, too.”
“Should I take the morning off from work and see if my dad can stay longer with Thunder today?”
“You assume correctly. You call your dad. I’ll go talk to your boss for you.”
Laughing, Grace put the phone to her ear. “I’m feeling an urge for champagne.”
“That’s a good urge, girlfriend. Very good urge. We get all those errands done, I’m buying.”
I’D MADE THE ROASTED CHICKENS—three, in fact. And I’d bought the Yukon Gold potatoes and thrown in a few sweet potatoes and carrots as well. A huge mixed greens salad and freshly baked baguettes from the new bakery in town, which used local wheat, completed the meal. Under my mother’s direction, Jill had set the table with the good china, the crystal glasses, and the silver cutlery.
Rae smiled wide as she shuffled in the dining room with her cane. She’d even put on her favorite gold hoop earrings for the occasion. “Why didn’t you set out the cloth napkins, Jill?”