See Me

by Higgins, Wendy

My pulse went into rocket-launch mode when Rock’s curly head found Cassidy, and she turned to him, bouncing. And then I felt McKale behind me, timid. He was being bumped into me, and his chest touched my back. I turned my head just enough to show him an easy smile as I reached back for his hands and led them to my hips. His touch was gentle. I kept my hands pressed over top of his until his grip became firmer. I was so nervous. I wanted this nearness, and I didn’t want to screw it up.

  More people joined the already crowded dance floor, forcing everyone closer. It was now or never. Time to be bold. I leaned back into him, just as a hip-hop song began, bass thumping. His reaction surprised me. With the slightest hesitance, he pulled my hips until our bodies matched up, aligned.

  My breathing became jagged as I reached back, putting my hands on his hips. I started moving mine to the tempo of the music, slowly at first. He met me move for move, so I deepened the pace until we were both dancing. Really dancing. Cassidy took a moment from her groping session with Rock to look over and mouth dramatically, “Oh, my gah!” when she saw us. I just smiled.

  My Leprechaun had rhythm. And it was hot in a way that made me dizzy. I let myself lean back hard against him, raising my arms to the air and moving my hips. I could feel his breath on my hair, against my ear and neck. His hands roamed, but not too far. Just over my waist and hips, down the top of my thighs. Arms still lifted, I bent my elbows and brought my hands behind me to his head, sliding my fingers into his hair. He nuzzled my neck and I was suddenly on fire.

  Killer moths attacked my abdomen as I turned, wrapping my arms around his neck and fitting my curves to him, still dancing. His hands found my lower back. I was about to ask him what he thought of the club when the look in his eyes silenced me.

  He watched my mouth, slowly leaning in, and I forgot about everything around us.

  Oh, my… was he about to…?

  The first touch of his lips was measured and timid—the perfect picture of the McKale I’d met on our first day. We breathed against each other’s parted lips until I dared to let my tongue touch the soft fullness I’d admired the night before. That action was like a lit match to a firecracker.

  Moving quickly with masculine instinct, one of his hands stayed on my lower back, pressing our hips together, while his other hand found the back of my neck and tugged me to him, hard, in a gesture of possession that had me moaning when his mouth opened mine with his own. Unlike my previous failed kisses, this one was the perfect combination of lips and tongues and hands. There was nothing shy about it. I was meeting this McKale for the first time. This was a McKale I wanted to get to know much better.

  I loved the way he smelled and tasted. Hops and barley on the surface from his drinks, but something sweeter underneath: the licorice root he liked to chew. As we kissed, I ran a hand over his cheek, feeling where his smooth skin met the rougher line of hair along his jaw. Every contour amazed me.

  I tried to reign in my self-control since I found myself practically climbing him for more, but he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he seemed just as hungry for more of me.

  I knew part of my desperation stemmed from the fact that someone very powerful wanted to keep us apart, but I wouldn’t allow thoughts of her to surface. I let myself breathe him in. We had this moment, right now, and nobody could take it away.

  We finally broke the kiss, followed-up with several more slow little smooches until we were ready to look at each other. He was half-grinning as if he couldn’t hold it back. Leaning into my ear, he said, “I fancy yer form of dance.”

  I laughed. With my arms still around his neck, I pulled him down and put my lips to his ear.

  “I fancy you, Kale.” I don’t know what made me shorten his name but he didn’t seem to mind.

  He slid his lips to my ear again. “Do ye, now?”

  I bit my bottom lip to hold back a giant smile, and murmured, “Yeah.” We were flirting!

  A new song started. Techno again. McKale began moving first, and it was my turn to match him. Cassidy and Rock pushed their way closer beside us, and together the four of us danced. Cass found my hand and squeezed it.

  It was a night to trump all others: Cassidy’s best idea ever. The guys made us laugh the entire time. Especially Rock with his exaggerated dancing as he tried to imitate how other men at the club moved.

  This night was more than a simple act of rebellion born of boredom. It was even more than getting away from the portal. It was about getting McKale to see me—really see me, and to see the possibility of what we could have together. I wanted us to have something worth fighting for.

  Cassidy must have recognized the wheels of thought churning in my expression because she shook her head at me and bumped my hip.

  “Not tonight, Robyn,” she shouted in my ear. “Just dance!”

  Yes, I thought, finding McKale behind me once again. Tonight we dance.

  THE SUN WAS PREPARING to rise when we got back to the village and glided the car into its original spot. I’d woken the others to help me. I guess Cassidy and Rock got tired of being yelled at to quit making lip-smacking noises in the backseat, and they’d fallen asleep halfway home.

  Knowing dawn would break at any moment, we made our way to the bungalows. My hand tingled, remembering how McKale held it the whole way home except the few times I needed both hands on the wheel. The memory of how he’d kissed me on the dance floor, then watched me while I drove had me sighing with contentment as my brilliant sister and I slipped into the room and collapsed onto our beds.

  Falling asleep would be a bad idea. Even though today was not a workday for the Shoe House, I still needed to get up and care for the animals this morning. I allowed myself a few minutes of remembrance before I trudged out of bed to change.

  “What’re you doing?” Cassidy mumbled. I thought she’d be asleep already.

  “I’m gonna do my morning chores early and then I’ll come back and go to bed. We can’t sleep too long though ‘cause Mom and Dad will get suspicious.”

  She grunted, falling asleep before I made it out the door.

  The sky was brightening and birds were chirping as I walked up the worn path. Weariness overtook me and I couldn’t wait to get back to the room and sleep. At the corner of the fence, I picked up my basket and the small bucket used to scoop meal from the barrel. Something moved by the hen house and I looked up, heart accelerating.

  McKale was leaning there with his arms crossed, waiting for me. My body reacted to the sight, heating and buzzing. I got my act together, gathering my things and moving toward him.

  “Hey,” I said, feeling shy and self-conscious about the potato-sack apron that covered my shorts and t-shirt. “Is everything okay?”

  He stared at me warmly for a minute without replying, and then he ran a hand through his red locks.

  “Aye, all is well. I needed to see ye once more before I took to bed.”

  “Oh,” I breathed. His voice sounded different. More confident and serious. The heat that began when I saw him now completely took over my body. Unlike when we’d first met, he didn’t try to avert his eyes from me. He was openly drinking me in with an inquisitive newness, unperturbed by my less-than-attractive clothing ensemble in the morning light. I set my basket on the thick fencepost.

  We moved forward at the same time, not stopping until we were kissing again, his hands wrapping around my waist to pull me close while my fingers found his hair. It was just as passionate as our kiss on the dance floor, only this time we could hear one another’s shortened breaths and satisfying little sounds. A low moan rose up from his throat. Knowing I caused that pleasure from deep inside him gave me a strange taste of power.

  A sudden snap from the path startled me and I pushed away from him. He kept a hand on my waist, protectively.

  “’Tis alright,” he whispered.

  Leilah and Rachelle stood at the opening of the path in their aprons and bonnets with baskets in their hands and astounded looks on their faces. McKale lifted a hand to them in
greeting. The girls simultaneously broke into giggles and turned, running down the path away from us. I let out a laugh and McKale grinned.

  “I’d best leave ye to yer work. Unless, er, perhaps ye’d like a hand since I frightened away the help?”

  I smiled at his offer. I appreciated that he was willing to jeopardize his man card to help me, but I was perfectly capable of doing it on my own.

  “It won’t take me long, McKale,” I told him. “You go get some sleep. I’ll see you this afternoon, right?”

  He pulled me to him again and laid his lips gently against mine.

  “I fancied it when ye called me Kale.”

  A shiver slid down my back and I sighed. Who was this guy? Was this who’d been hiding under that shell all along? Because I liked him. A lot. He made me feel like a new and improved version of myself.

  “Another date today, aye?” he said against my lips. “The two of us.”

  “Okay,” I whispered. One more cute grin, and then he was walking away, down the path, standing taller than I’d ever seen him. I couldn’t bring myself to move until every trace of red hair disappeared into the village.

  Mom came to our room and woke us with two plates of food at midday. We took the plates with slow, guilty movements.

  “You girls must have stayed up too late last night.” She was sitting cross-legged on the woven throw rug while Cassidy and I sat on our beds. We nodded at her and chewed our food.

  “So, where exactly did you take the car for six hours?”

  The bite I’d just swallowed halted in my esophagus, and Cass turned as green as a pixie. For a moment I wondered if Mom was talented enough to give us both the Heimlich at the same time. She gave a halfhearted grin at our choking silence.

  “You girls know I’m a light sleeper when I’m not exhausted. And I’ve been on my guard with everything going on lately. We would have let you go if you had asked, you know. You could have left sooner and had more time away.” She shifted her pointed gaze back and forth between the two of us. “Ah, well. What a shame.”

  Cassidy and I looked at each other.

  “Mom…,” I began. As the “mature and responsible” older sister, I felt the sting of blame from within. Saying sorry seemed so measly.

  She put us out of our misery by shrugging and standing, brushing off her bottom and leaving us.

  “Shitballs,” Cass said, around the mouthful of bread she’d yet to swallow. I nodded my head in agreement. Mom tried not to show it, but I knew she was hurt that we’d run off behind her back. I set my fork on the plate, not hungry anymore.

  I couldn’t restrain the snark. “Told you we should have just asked.”

  “Oh, shut up. You were having the time of your life, all, kiss me Leprechaun! Don’t act like you regret it.”

  I whacked her head with a feather pillow and she whined. “I regret hurting Mom,” I clarified. “We need to go apologize.”

  “And beg forgiveness,” Cass added, sounding grumpy. She threw the pillow back to my bed. “At least you can’t be grounded anymore. I might not have a life for the beginning of my senior year now.”

  We crawled out of bed and got ready to face the day. Cassidy grabbed my arm.

  “Please tell me it was worth it,” she said.

  I looked in her pretty brown eyes. “It was so worth it,” I admitted.

  She grinned. “Is he a good kisser?”

  I felt embarrassed and tried not to smile, which made her poke me in the side.

  “Tell me!” she said, tickling my waist.

  “All right, yes!” I laughed. “Oh, my gosh. Just… yes.”

  She stilled and eyed me with loving affection. I knew all of her expressions so well. She was happy for me, and sort of proud. But it was the kind of pride laced with sadness, like a parent whose child was growing up and preparing to leave them.

  “Come on,” I whispered, afraid to get emotional.

  Cassidy and I walked down to the clearing where people ate and played various games.

  McKale sat with my parents. He looked pale when he saw us.

  “Ah, girls!” Dad said. “McKale was just telling us all about the dance club.”

  Oy. My stomach tightened. McKale gave us apologetic looks as we sat down in our usual places, slumping.

  “Mom and Dad,” I said. “I’m sorry we took the car without asking.” My voice was somber, but the words still sounded lame.

  “Yeah, we’re sorry.” Cassidy looked like she might cry again. The girl had an endless supply of tears at her disposal.

  “If something had happened to you all…” Mom let the thought taper away as she closed her eyes and shook her head, imagining the worst.

  We hung our heads in shame.

  “You girls aren’t children anymore. We’re prepared to give you more freedoms if you act responsibly. Your mother and I are reasonable people, aren’t we?”

  Cass and I nodded at him, barely raising our chins.

  Dad exhaled a heavy sigh and went on. “You’re old enough now that we should be able to talk through things. Let’s just put last evening behind us for now and try to enjoy the rest of the summer. We can plan another trip out of the village at some point before we go, okay?” Again we nodded. “Alrighty then. What’s on your agendas for today?”

  We were all quiet for a second, and then I decided to throw out some positive vibes.

  “McKale and I are going on a date today. Right now if that’s okay.”

  My parents perked up.

  “Of course,” Mom cooed, taking Dad’s hand and smiling at us. I watched as McKale’s eyes took in my parent’s affectionate interaction with one another.

  “Yeah. I think it’s time for the video and the bin.”

  Cassidy gasped and Mom covered her heart.

  “Oh, honey, I think that’s a wonderful idea.”

  “Thanks,” I said, relieved that the worst of the tension had passed from the table. I looked at McKale again, whose face now showed obvious confusion. “I’m probably going to need your help carrying something,” I told him. “I thought we could go to your favorite place today.”

  “Erm… aye, of course.” He stood after I did and we reached for each others’ hands.

  When I turned to say good-bye to my family, both my mom and sister had tears streaming, and I swear my dad’s eyes glistened as well. Ah, my family. Sweet cry babies. My heart was full, and I said the only thing worth saying.

  “Love you guys.”

  McKale gave me a what-the-heck-is-going-on? look, so I gently tugged his hand and led him to my room. He stood in the doorway like a gentleman. He looked happy when he saw the tiny berry basket he’d given me on the table next to my bed. I’d started picking flowers to put in it every morning after chores.

  “So, I have an idea,” I told him. “We’re going to be out for a long time today, if that’s all right. Probably past dinner.”

  “A long date?” He seemed to love using the foreign word. “Well, tha’s just terrible, it is.”

  I laughed, charmed because he’d never really teased me before. I bent to pick up my backpack and put it on my shoulders. It had my laptop and a spare battery pack. To be on the safe side I shoved my compact umbrella inside, too. Then I leaned down and lifted the bin. It wasn’t heavy, but it was bulky. McKale took it from me, looking down at the blue plastic container with interest.

  “You’ll see,” I promised him. “Come on, let’s go.”

  We stopped at the kitchen and grabbed a bundle of bread, dried meat, and a jar of mead. And then we were off, veering out from the village to make a wide arc around the portal. Neither of us made mention of the other realm or its freaky occupants. McKale led me through the grasses and underbrush, stopping once to pull a small licorice plant from the ground. We skirted the edge of the forest, which was lined with beautiful, tall flowers. McKale must have seen me admiring them.

  “Hollyhock,” he said, nodding his head toward the flowers and then looking straight ahead as he carri
ed the bin with ease. His ears seemed to redden. My eyes went back to the flowers growing along the border of the woods, and I was amazed. I reminded him of those? They had solid stalks where they shot up from the earth, spiking upward into multiple stems with light green leaves and clusters of gorgeous blooms. There were hundreds of the flowers lining this path, in soft violets and rich maroons. Looking at them made me feel beautiful and strong.

  “’Tis here,” McKale whispered. We came to a hill with an oak tree sitting at the top. I relished the slight burn in my legs as we climbed until we were shaded under the oak’s thick canopy. It smelled earthy, like moss and mushrooms. McKale set the bin down amid the soft grass and clover as I spread a blanket, motioning for him to sit next to me. My whole body was alight with anticipation.

  “I’m going to start at the beginning,” I explained, cracking the bin just enough to pull out the paddle and ball. My hands were shaking. “This is a toy. It goes like this.” I tried to show him and he chuckled as I fumbled. A perfect example of why I didn’t play hand sports. I held the toy out and told him to give it a try. After a few failed attempts, he totally had it going, just like the seven-year-old-me knew he would. He was so cute concentrating with his tongue poking out again.

  “Kale?”

  “Hm?” He continued bouncing the ball on the paddle, almost losing it but recovering with a slight tilt.

  “I got that for you when I was seven. Will you do me the honor of accepting this gift?”

  He brought it down to his lap. “Seven? Ye were but a wee child…”

  I nodded. “And I was thinking about you.”

  He was motionless, and I could sense thoughts circulating in his mind, trying to process the idea.

  “Aye, Robyn. I would be honored to accept this gift from ye.”

  “Yay!” I laughed at my own girly exclamation.

  And so the fun began. One by one, I pulled out each gift in chronological order, explaining and asking him to accept it. My inner child rejoiced with each acceptance, and as the gifts piled up around him, I felt something lifting in each of us, shifting us closer. When we got to the first gift that I’d talked about on video, I set up the laptop and watched McKale’s eyes pop.