I nod. “More.”
“Oh, I’ll give you more, baby,” he says, looking down on me with a wicked smile. “I’m going to make those tits bounce and you scream my name when you come all over my dick.”
A fresh wave of lust washes over me. “More action, less talk.”
He pumps his hips hard and I gasp as he fills me, almost to the point of pain. He’s huge. He’s moving and my body moves with him. He thrusting harder now, still talking dirty to me while pressing sweet kisses on my cheek and mouth. I wrap my legs around his lean hips and he slides in further.
“Holy…sweet…hell, baby. You feel good.” He dips his head and I arch my back, wanting his mouth on my nipples. He sucks, swirls his tongue and then lets go, planting an elbow on each side of me.
His blue eyes are nearly black now and he’s thrusting into me so hard that the bed rocks and squeaks with us. “Oh God…ugn…ohmygod,” I breath. “Don’t stop, don’t stop.”
He groans low in his throat, then slips a hand between us and presses down on my clit. I see stars, call out his name and he kisses me, stroking the sides of my cheeks. He rocks faster, his tongue tangling in mine, until he tears his mouth away and growls my name.
Our eyes meet and I’m undone by the emotion in them. I am undone by him. I thought I wanted to forget, but he makes me remember all the very good things about being vulnerable with a guy.
“You okay?” he asks softly.
I nod, too overwhelmed to speak. Too afraid I’ll ruin this perfect moment.
Cole rolls to the side, taking me with him, his hands slowly gliding up and down my back. I feel…loved. There’s no other word for it. I snuggle closer, breathing in the mouthwatering scent of him.
“Can you stay the night?” he asks between kisses on my shoulder and top of my back.
I sigh. Nothing like getting caught up in the moment and forgetting that a curfew is in place. Well, a curfew imposed by me. I respect my grandmother too much to use her house like a hotel. “No. Nana will worry if I don’t come home.”
He nods. “Give me ten minutes to hold you.”
Ten minutes isn’t enough. I want hours, days, weeks...years. I want forever. But I’m terrified to give my thoughts a voice. “It’s only nine. How about three hours? We can watch T.V. if you get bored,” I tease, with success, because he rolls his eyes playfully and squeezes me tighter. That feeling of being loved grows stronger, but I shove it aside.
Until now, the only guy I’d ever been with had my undying love. And I thought I had his.
Maybe things are better when love’s not involved. It’ll be easier to say goodbye when the time comes.
Or so I try to convince myself.
*** *** ***
Cole
Water runs down my body as I slowly thrust into her, blue eyes widening with every roll of my hips. She’s tight everywhere: her grip on my shoulders, her pussy around my dick and her thighs around my waist.
She gasps my name and then moans. I join her seconds later, unable to prolong my orgasm any further. I lean my forehead against the tiled wall, panting while my heart races. This is the third time I’ve been inside of her tonight. The second, only an hour earlier, with her bent over my bed, my hands on her hips and her face buried in the mattress.
There’s a handprint on her right ass cheek. Mine, of course, from when she’d gotten too impatient and tried to top from the bottom. She’d liked it so much that there’s a matching one her left cheek.
I grin and slide out of her, stepping out of the shower to dispose of the condom. She’s washing her hair when I join her again.
“You already did that,” I say. “We washed each other, before you got all frisky with me, remember?”
She blinks at me, skin pinkening. “Oh, I forgot.” I give her a “Seriously?” look. “Well, obviously not that part. Frisky, whatever,” she huffs, but a little smile of satisfaction takes away the edge to her complaint. “Fine. You made me a mindless sex machine. Happy?”
“Oh yeah,” I laugh. Pure male satisfaction rises within me at the notion that I’ve basically screwed her senseless. Only with Rae, this was more than just screwing or fucking or even sex.
And I’m not quite sure what to do with that. Should I take hold of it, mold it into an acceptable guy feeling? Shit. Is there such a thing as an acceptable guy feeling? Hell, it’s been so long since I’ve had a feeling this strong besides rage that I don’t know.
Rae rinses her hair and steps out of the shower. I scrub off my junk and join her. She hands me a towel and we both dry off in silence. It’s not an uneasy silence but it’s not exactly comfortable either. I know the thoughts battling it out in my head, so God only knows what’s in hers.
She has her secrets. That much is clear.
I walk out of the bathroom and down the hall to my room, Rae close behind. A quick glance at my phone for the time and I plop down on my bed, stretching my legs out. My feet touch the bed frame at the end. I try to not let that bother me. I try not to think of the kind of place Rae lives in. Yes, she lives with her parents, but all I can imagine is a huge mansion like the one my sperm donor lives in for part of the year.
Yeah, I know his schedule. When I was little, Crystal required me to know everything about him.
“Be good for momma, Cole. Don’t talk back. Don’t raise your voice. Be nice to your little brother and for God’s sake don’t whine,” Crystal whispers as I watch my father pace the living room, phone in one hand and beer in another. I’m seven years old and Parker is five. Our parents have been fighting for hours. “You’re gonna help make sure he doesn’t leave me this time and go back to that bitch.”
Nothing like putting the pressure of an adult relationship falling apart on a little boy’s shoulders. But I guess for Crystal, I’ve been the only man who hasn’t left her, hasn’t abused her. Although, I’m pretty sure she’s thinks I’ve taken advantage of her by breathing.
Rae joins me on the bed, pressing her body, hot from the shower, close to mine. I feel her breasts on me, her firm thigh as she carefully places it across my groin. Something I appreciate since I’m not very fond of my balls getting smashed.
She brushes back the hair in my eyes. “Sleepy?”
More like exhausted. “Satisfied.”
She stretches, her body rubbing mine. “You should be.”
“What about you?” I ask, turning my attention to her.
She smiles, then props her chin up on my chest. “More than satisfied.”
We fall back into the silence that permeated the bathroom. Judging by the look on Rae’s face, she doesn’t mind. In fact she looks half asleep, eyes blinking slower and slower, until she repositions herself for the last time and mumbles, “Wake me up before midnight.”
I kiss the top of her head. “You got it, Cinderella.”
A soft snort, then a deep breath and she’s out. Wrapping one arm loosely around her, I grab my phone and scroll through Facebook, but I’m really not interested in viewing photobombing kittens in a shark suit memes.
She snuggles closer, a soft sigh leaving her.
I don’t think I’ll ever get used this. Sure, Madison and I talked afterwards, but it was out on her balcony while we smoked. Then I’d leave, go do my thing while she did whatever it was she did. I’m not exactly the type to cuddle and talk, or even sleep, but that’s not because I have an aversion to it. Time’s my enemy, not women.
Only tonight I have all the time in the world. Midnight curfew notwithstanding.
The rest of our time together slips by and at five, until I gently shake Rae away. Big blue eyes blink up at me, sleepy and adorable. Lips full and pouty as she yawns with one of those girl noises accompanying it.
Somehow we manage to get dressed and out the door without falling into bed again. Not the easiest thing since she’d muttered how sore she was as we walked to my Jeep. My ego had gotten real happy about that complaint.
Pulling into the driveway, I cut the lights and turn off the engine.
Small puffs of cold air coming from our mouths as we sit there.
“Rae—”
“—Cole”
“Ladies, first,” I say with a grin, then take her hand in mine.
“I don’t regret what happened between us tonight,” she says softly, her face hidden in the shadows.
“Neither do I.”
“Of course you don’t, you’re a guy,” she says ending with a snort.
I flip on the interior light so she can see my face. I want her to see that I’m completely serious. “This isn’t a one night stand for me. I’m not sure how you’re used to being treated, but I can imagine some guys probably dated you because of who you are. I don’t care who you are.”
She frowns and I quickly add, “I mean, I care who you are, but who you are to everyone else? Not important to me. You’re just Rae, this really hot girl that I met at the Piggly Wiggly at the ass crack of dawn.”
Her frown gives way to the sweetest smile I’ve ever seen. “I don’t care who you are either, Cole Morgan.” Then she leans in, kissing my cheek and this time I shiver at her touch.
The front porch light blinks on and off. Rae laughs. “It’s after twelve. Better go in before I turn into a complete pumpkin.”
I walk her to the door, wrap her up in my arms and lower my forehead to hers. “I put my number in your phone while you were sleeping.”
“Guess I better text you.”
“Yeah.” I grin, then let go of her and open the door. She walks in, with a little backwards wave and shuts the door behind her.
A few minutes later, I’m back at home, drinking a cold one while I sit on the back steps. My phone vibrates and I glance at it.
Good night. <3 Rae
That little heart emoticon gives me the goofiest swell of emotion in history. Hell, I think I could give Wyatt a run for his money. He’s the king of goof.
Night. I add a heart because it seems like the appropriate thing to do. Guess that makes me the king of goof’s bitch? Or is that love’s bitch?
Either way, this girl owns me.
Chapter Fifteen
Violet
The next morning I wake up and text Cole first thing:
Morning!!!! Meet me at the creek today?
Cole doesn’t text me back right away and my stomach flips. I’ve never experienced this part of dating before: The Morning After. Jaxon, for all his flaws, texted me the next day and had flowers delivered. At least I don’t have to worry about the dreaded walk of shame.
I take my time getting dressed and then join Nana in the kitchen for breakfast. I’m ravenous and eat most of the bacon she’s fried up before I come up for air. Two biscuits and some scrambled eggs later, I lean back in my chair. Who knew sex could make a person so hungry? I reach for my glass of orange juice and gulp it down.
My grandmother looks at me, her blue eyes kind. “Did you have fun last night?”
I manage not to choke and set the glass down. “Yes, but Cole ended up driving me home.”
She nods. “I’m glad he walked you to the door, instead of dropping you off. Such a nice young man.”
Yeah, well that nice young man won’t return my text, I want to snap, but it’s not her fault. She’s trying to be encouraging. Instead, I focus on the nice things he did do for me. “He let me wear his coat, too.”
She smiles approvingly, then rises from the table. We clear the dishes and put everything away before heading to church. I check my phone several times on the way over. Nothing. Then just like a pathetic loser, I check it again once we’re inside and seated.
Nothing.
I feel sick. I feel used and stupid. Why had Cole bothered to say all those things to me? Had it been guilt? Did it matter now? I’d fallen for it, for him. Hook. Line. Sinker.
After the church service, I walk to the truck while Nana talks to her friends. It’s cool enough that I can open the door and sit inside without breaking a sweat. I pull my phone out of my purse and check it for the millionth time. Still no text from Cole.
Get a hold of yourself, I mentally berate myself. Instead of pining over some guy, I should be concerned that Lacey knew about the “miscarriage”. My initial check last night had only turned up one news article from some random gossip site.
I won’t do that again. I’ve been taught not to go on those sites from day one of my career. There have only been a handful of times when I’ve not listened. Last night was one of them.
But today, as soon as I walk in the door, I’ll go straight to my laptop and check my emails.
Maybe it won’t be that bad.
*** *** ***
Cole
“Cole,” someone hisses in my ear.
“Go away,” I mumble. This is the first time in years, it seems, that I’ve been able to sleep in without Kelly waking me up.
“Dammit, Cole, get up.” Cold water is thrown on my fac.
I sit up with an angry shout, swiping water out of my eyes. “What the fu—” I blink.
Crystal is standing there, cup in her hand and scowl on her face. Her eyes are glassy. Shit. She’s high as fuck. “Where did you put it?”
Ignoring her demand, I ask, “What the hell are you doing here?” There’s no way she’s been let out. Gentle Winds’ contract says a family member is required to pick up patients.
She fists one hand on her hip. “Is that anyway to talk to your momma?”
I don’t answer that, mostly because I don’t want to be backhanded across the face. “What are you doing here, Crystal?” I ask instead, varying my questions and inflection. “How did you get here?”
“Paid one of the orderlies to sneak me out,” she says dismissively and I want to puke. She hadn’t been allowed to take money or jewelry with her, so the only thing she had to use as currency was her body.
I get out of bed and begin to strip the wet sheets. “This will be the first place the police will come looking.”
She smirks. “Don’t plan on staying here long enough to be found. Where’s my baby girl? She needs to pack up.”
Her words stop me cold. Oh, shit. “You’re not taking her.”
“She’s mine, not yours.”
I count to ten before answering her. “And she’s not private property either. She’s a little girl, with friends and a routine for God’s sake.”
“I don’t need a lecture,” she says with a toss of her honey-colored hair. “I need my money.”
“Community property in this house.”
She shrieks, then throws the cup at me. I duck and it hits the wall behind me. “Dammit, Cole. That was my money.”
“Oh sorry,” I say with a smirk, “I blew it all on food, rent and clothes while your parents paid for your little vacation. My bad.” I’m lying. Her money is hidden in Kelly’s room, sewn inside her favorite teddy bear. I get dressed, grabbing a pair of clean jeans and a long-sleeved t-shirt from the pile folded on top of my dresser.
“You’re lying,” she says finally, “And if I have to tear this house apart to find it, I will.”
I push past her, sheets in the crook of my arm and snag my cell phone on the way out. I hear glass breaking and things being slammed against the wall as I calmly load the washer.
She shouts obscenities and stomps from my room and straight into the kitchen, where she knows she can make the biggest mess and do the most damage.
And just like always, I’ll be the one cleaning up behind her.
***
It’s not until three hours later that Crystal finally settles down. Nearly every room in the house is destroyed. Only Kelly’s remains untouched, like it has every time my mother has thrown a tantrum—drug induced or not—and it’s why Parker and I have always hidden money in there. Or anything of value.
I keep glancing at the text Rae sent me, torn between answering her or driving over to her Nana’s house, picking her up and hauling ass to parts unseen. Unfortunately neither the sane or insane thoughts I’m having right now do me any good. I’m stuck, waiting out Hurric
ane Crystal.
While Crystal had been busy breaking the dishes I’d just bought to replace the old ones, I’d made arrangements for Kelly to spend another night at the Evans’ house. I’d pick her up in the morning with her backpack and lunchbox, then take her to school myself. Mrs. Evans said they had clothes Kelly could borrow, so I didn’t have to worry about that, at least.
Parker’s on his way to the bar, to open it before the Sunday evening crowd arrives, which meant I was closing.
Bright side: Jane had a great Friday and Saturday night; she only had to break up two fights and made a shit ton of cash from a bachelorette party that came in and decided to have an impromptu karaoke night.
I’m all for shit tons of cash. Best kind of shit I know.
A blood curdling scream rips through the house, and the hair on the back of my neck stands. I jump to my feet and run inside.
My mother is lying in the floor, holding her arm while blood gushes out with every pump of her heart. Her skin is flayed open, starting at her elbow and ending just shy of her wrist.
“Holy shit, Momma.” I drop to my knees, grabbing a towel that’s hanging on a half-open drawer. “What did you do?”
Blue eyes glazed with pain narrow at me. “Give me my money, dammit, or I’ll slit the other one and Kelly will come home to this.”
Pulling her close, I press the towel hard against her arm, trying to staunch the flow of blood. Tears spring to my eyes, my nose gets all runny and I sniff. Damn her for making me feel this way. So small and insignificant while playing to the side she knows will protect Kelly at all cost. “Why do you hate us so much?”
“I don’t hate them.” She sneers at me. “Just you.”
Hurt slashes threw me, like the knife she used to cut herself. I grab the damn thing and fling it across the room so hard it becomes embedded in the wall. She laughs weakly. “Way to go, Cole. If I die, then they’ll have your fingerprints on the murder weapon.”
“I’ll get your damn money, but first I’m calling 911.” I pull my phone out of my back pocket, call 911 and head back into the kitchen to make sure Crystal doesn’t cut herself again while we’re waiting for the cops and E.M.T. to arrive.
Live For You (Boys of the South ~ Book 1) Page 10