Parker steps in front of Rae and takes a closer look at my face. “What the hell happened to you?”
I let my hands fall to the side. “Got into a fight,” I mumble. I’ve never been good at keeping secrets from him.
“I can see that.”
Rae pushes past my brother and marches up to me, her eyes rounding. She gasps. “It’s worse than before.” She runs from the room and comes back seconds later with a bag of frozen peas. “Put this on.”
“Don’t need it.”
She steps back, hurt replacing concern and I want to punch myself a thousand times. In the face. With a hammer. Then maybe I’ll think twice before hurting her again.
“Hey,” I say catching her by the elbow. I stop myself from gathering her up in my arms and marching us to her bedroom. “Thank you, but it looks way worse than it actually is.”
She glances at my hand, then back up at me. “Good.”
I’ve missed her so bad. Two days away and I’m jonesing for her touch. Her smile, the way she sounds when I’m inside of her. While I crashed at Beau’s, there were tons of opportunities to be with other girls, but I kept my hands, my dick and my mouth to myself.
And now I know it’s because she has my heart.
“Can we talk?”
Her eyes soften and I can only imagine how they look when I tell her how I really feel. Or at least how I hope to God they look when I tell her. “Okay.”
Parker clears his throat. “I hate interrupting this very special Lifetime movie moment, but Cole, we have to talk. Now.”
I keep looking at Rae, then stroke her cheek. “No. She’s more important.”
“I get that. I’m happy for you, but unless the two of you can survive on love alone, we need to talk.”
Finally I tear my gaze away and focus on my brother. “What happened?”
“Hurricane Crystal turned into a vacuum cleaner and cleaned us out.”
“You mean—”
“The Double Deuce is broke. I paid everyone, including vendors, but not you and me, with what was in the safe.”
Our rainy day fund. Gone. I let go of Rae and sink down on the couch. “What the hell are we going to do?” Even if I fight again, and that was a big if, there was no guarantee I’d win and go home with six grand. Plus, I wasn’t too keen on hanging out with Baldy and Frank on a weekly basis.
I had come to this conclusion once the Percocet had worn off and I’d ended up worshipping at the altar of the porcelain god this morning. For three hours straight. Dry heaves hurt like a son of a bitch when your ribs are bruised.
Hell, I’m still shaky from it.
“I have a solution,” Rae says.
Parker turns to her. “No offense, but I don’t think a bake sale will cut it.”
I give my brother a look. “Bake sale, really?”
Turning back to me, he shrugs. “Sometimes I say stupid things. Sue me, why don’t you?”
“If I thought I could make some money off of it, I would.”
“Boys,” Rae shouts, before we really get into it. She smiles sweetly as we fix our eyes on her. “My solution is to have a big name act perform at your bar.”
I’m already shaking my head. There’s no way I’d interrupt her privacy. There’s no way I’d use her like that. “No, I won’t do it.”
“You wouldn’t want Jaxon Hunter, the biggest star going now, to come play at The Double Deuce?” she asks.
I have no idea who he is. “Uh?”
“Oh hell yes,” Parker says, “That one song of his, Break It Down for Me Country Girl, is my jam.” These are the times I question if my brother and I even have the same mother. “Hold on. You know Jaxon?”
Rae might not know Jaxon, but I’m willing to bet my Jeep that Violet Lynn does.
She tips up her chin and crosses her arms. “Let’s just say the rat bastard owes me. Big time.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Violet
I text Jaxon as soon as Parker leaves. Cole’s sitting beside me, one arm resting along the back of the couch.
“Will he answer?”
“He’d better.”
Cole grows silent again, then asks, “Want to talk about that nice knowing you bullshit you pulled on me?”
I look at him, bringing one up one leg to rest my chin on my knee. “It wasn’t bullshit.”
“It wasn’t fair.” He drops his chin, peering at me through his long black lashes. “You can’t just break up with someone on the phone, Rae.”
I make a face. “You’d just broken up with me. I was being polite.”
“Polite?” He blinks at me. “After all that’s happened between us, after all the stuff we shared, that’s the best fight I can get from you?”
“I haven’t shared everything with you,” I snap. “There’s lots of stuff you still don’t know about me. Things that if you knew, you would probably…you would probably—” I can’t continue and I cover my face with my hands as fresh round of tears emerge. This is the most I’ve cried in months and I’m not sure if it’s a good or bad thing.
Cole pulls me into his lap, taking my phone and setting it somewhere. He rubs my shoulders, easing all the tension that has built up. “I can guaran-damn-tee you there’s nothing you’ve done in your past that would make me feel differently about you.”
I let my hands fall away and I wrap my arms around his wide shoulders, burying my face in his neck. “You wouldn’t be saying that if you knew. You’d be disgusted with me.”
“Disgusted is a strong word, Rae.”
“It’s an accurate description.”
His hands slide down from my shoulders to the small of my back. He kneads the muscles there and I can’t help but groan in appreciation.
“Do you want to be with me, Rae, because I sure as hell want to be with you. And there’s nothing on this planet that could stop me from wanting that. From wanting you.”
Oh, but there is, I think And I love him so much that I’ll prove it to him once and for all. “Do you want to get married one day and have kids?”
He laughs though it’s a little strained. “Are you proposing?”
I sit up, wiping the tears from my face and fix my gaze on him. He‘s so beautiful and sexy (even with his bruised and battered face) that I want to sigh and take him to bed, instead of revealing all my dirty not-so-little secrets. “No. I want to know if those things are important to you.”
“Sometimes they are.”
“But what about kids?”
“Sure I’d like those, too,” he says, his expression clearly venturing from amused to confused. “Where are you going with all of this?”
I’m going to set you free, I think, as my heart breaks into tiny pieces. “The wreck I was in, the one that I caused?”
He nods.
“My scar,” I gulp and take a breath. “I can’t have kids. Ever. I only have half an ovary left and it barely functions. I’m empty inside. There’s nothing there. Nothing. And it’s all my fault. ”
*** *** ***
Cole
I can’t close my eyes and pretend I never saw the look of utter hopelessness on her face. Or cover my ears and pretend I never heard the vulnerability and pain in her voice.
“Now you know. I’m not normal or whole or even completely female anymore.” Her head dips and her hands come between us, like she wants to push me away, but I won’t let her. “I should have told you before we had sex, but I wanted you too badly.”
I have no idea what to do or say in that moment. What do you say to that? ‘It’ll be okay’ won’t cut it.
“But don’t worry, I won’t go back home until after Jaxon performs.”
“Fuck Jaxon Hunter,” I snarl and she flinches. “Do you really think I care about that? Any of it?”
Big blue eyes with tears in their lashes blink up at me. “Why wouldn’t you?”
“Because you’ve trusted me with your darkest secret while telling me you’re leaving me after that rat bastard of an ex that cheated
on you leaves. Right now, that ranks highest on my list of priorities.”
“How do you know he’s my ex?”
“I’m pretty sure women don’t refer to men as rat bastards unless they’ve done them wrong.” I kiss her forehead and try to hold her, but she struggles against me.
“Wait,” she cries and I immediately let her go. “That’s not all.”
Honestly, I don’t know if I can handle anymore. I’m not even sure if I’m the person Rae needs to talk to. But I’m here. And I tell myself that I’m strong enough to handle anything she throws my way.
“Jaxon and I…weren’t careful all of the time. Sometimes we waited a lot longer than we should have and I got pregnant. Only I didn’t know, because it was too early and I was only a few days late…” Her hands drift to her stomach and press in while mine feels like it’s been punched repeatedly. “I didn’t know, or I wouldn’t have had anything to drink. I would have told Jaxon ahead of time, so we could have decided... I would have done so many things different that night.”
This is why I don’t believe in God. How in the hell can He let something like this happen to a girl who’d made one mistake? Sure, she should have been punished for driving drunk. But like this?
I have no words.
“Please believe me, Cole. I didn’t mean for it to happen. I need someone to believe me. I need—” I gently press my fingertips to her lips and look straight into her eyes.
Then I find the words. “I believe you.”
She launches herself into my arms once more, sobs wracking her body as she cries. Tears burn at the back of my eyes and I blink them away. “Don’t you think you’ve punished yourself enough?”
“I don’t know…it’s a pretty big damn deal, I think,” she sniffs.
“Dammit, Rae, I’m not with you for your uterus or ovaries.” I have no damn clue where I’m going with this or even what the hell I’m saying. All I want her to know is that I’m serious. That I’m here. “And I’m not leaving you.”
“I think that’s the sweetest, most romantic thing I’ve ever heard,” she gulps.
Seconds. Minutes. Hours. I’m not sure how long we sit here, her in my lap while I stroke her back. She’s so soft and relaxed while snuggled up against me, I’m surprised she hasn’t fallen asleep by now.
Her phone rings and she jumps. “Jaxon,” she breathes and I want to punch him, because I’m pretty damn sure she’s said his name exactly like that in the past.
I expect her to walk out of the room, but she stays planted in my lap. Where she belongs.
Letting my head fall back against the couch, I close my eyes and think of all the things I need to do tomorrow. If Rae can’t persuade Jaxon to come down here, then I’ll have no choice but to walk away from The Double Deuce and find a new job.
I can’t sell The Double Deuce—it’s not in my name.
“That’s very generous of you,” I hear her say and my eyes pop open. “Two weeks from now?” She taps me on the shoulder and covers the phone with her hand. “Will that work?”
I nod.
“The owner says yes and he’s a pretty chill guy to work with, but you’re dealing with me. No special treatment. No showing up late, either. You’ll be here the day before, by dinner, so we can go over set lists. Bring your band with you.” She gives me a thumbs up and a bright smile. “Truly a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Hunter. Oh, and if you even think about backing out, I’ll tell the entire world about—”
“Fine.” She ends the call, tosses her phone to one side and grins like the cat that’s caught the canary. “We got him by the short hairs.”
I stare at her in awe. “You are truly frightening when you want to be.”
“That wasn’t the best part though.” Her eyes shine and I’m jealous as hell a phone call with her ex put that there, even if it was about me. Even if she included me in the conversation.
I tilt my head to one side. “What was?”
“To be able to help the guy I love,” she says, her smile blinding and sweet.
That wasn’t the answer I was expecting. “You love me?” I start to panic, not because I’m afraid of her love, but because I don’t deserve it. “But I’m not—”
“Cole, hush,” she says, her hands coming up to cup my face. “You don’t have to say it back. I don’t expect you to say it back. But fair warning: I’ve decided that I’m not leaving, at least not without you by my side. I deserve to be happy. I deserve you, Cole Morgan.”
One hand falls away and takes mine. She leads me to her room and slowly takes off her clothes. I’m shaking like a damn leaf by the time she gets around to me.
“Poor thing,” she whispers, kissing every bruise and cut on my body.
Slowly, I ease back on her bed, grunting at bit when my ribs pull. “Ride me, baby,” I say, helping her straddle me. “I have condoms in my—”
“Don’t need those, remember?”
Love for her swells inside of me. “Doesn’t matter. Until we both agree, condom it is.”
She kisses my neck, my jaw and then bites my ear. “I don’t want you to use one. I want you to come inside of me.”
There’s nothing I want more,” I murmur. “But don’t do it because you think I deserve a reward.”
“Oh no,” she whispers in my ear, making me shiver. “You coming inside of me is my reward.”
And if that isn’t the hottest thing I’ve ever heard, I don’t know what is. “Then I’m all yours, baby.”
She lowers herself on me, biting that bottom lip of hers and holding onto my shoulders. I suck in a breath as her bare walls surround my dick. My eyes water and when she begins to rock her hips, I have to smash my lips together to keep from yelling.
Faster and harder she rocks upon me. Every rise and fall on her hips sends me closer and closer to the edge of orgasm, but she won’t let me fall.
Grabbing each hip, I take over and pump into her like it’s the last time I’ll ever be able to have her like this.
Her tits bounce, hard little nipples begging for my attention. I draw one into my mouth, sucking hard and she shudders. Her pussy clamps down hard on me and she falls forward, biting my shoulder.
And just like that I come, growling her name.
When we both come back down to Earth, I scoot down and roll to one side. She strokes my cheek, her blue eyes soft.
“Rae?”
She traces the words of my tattoo, the one that says: This too shall pass. “Yes?”
“I love you.”
*** *** ***
Violet
The three of us sit down to breakfast together. Well, Kelly sits in her brother’s lap, holding on for dear life to his shirt with one hand, while eating toast with the other.
Cole doesn’t seem to mind though. Every so often I catch him hugging Kelly tight and whispering in her ear.
When she’d first woken up and found him on the couch, she screamed like Santa had just brought her every present in the world.
I stood in the hallway and cried while he assured her that he wasn’t going anywhere without her ever again. Kelly hasn’t asked about her mother, not even once and my heart aches for her. For Crystal, too, because she’s missing so much.
“Who will pick me up after school today?” Kelly asks for the umpteenth time.
Cole, patient as ever, answers her, “You’ll ride the bus home. I promise to be waiting on the front porch steps.”
Kelly looks at me. “What about you?”
“What time?”
“Her bus gets there at 3:15.”
I groan. “I’m sorry. I already made plans with Lacey to get our nails done. But we can do something afterwards. Maybe Cole will let you sleep over again.” And maybe Cole would sleepover again too. While he could. Nana would be home on Monday.
Satisfied with my answer, Kelly grins, then looks up at her big brother. “Puh-lease Cole, can I sleep here tonight?”
He looks at me over her head. “Oh I don’t know. Think Rae would le
t me sleep here tonight, too? I’ll be so lonely without you. Who’s gonna chase all those monsters away for me?”
“Not Parker.” Kelly takes a big bite of her toast. “He falls asleep every time I try to tell him where they are.”
“Fine,” I say, crossing my arms like I’ve just the made a really hard decision. “Cole can come over and sleep, too.”
Kelly cheers and Cole grins at me.
Last night he told me he loved me. Last night I’d told him exactly what the bluebird on my hip meant and he showed me the lines of my song he’d had tattooed on his back.
“My song?” I had gasped, tracing the words back to where you belong with a fingertip.
“That’s my song,” he said, capturing my finger and pulling it into his mouth. He bit and licked it, before gently pushing it into mine. “And don’t you forget it.”
Then we made love a second time.
I can’t help but grin back….and wish that all my mornings were like this.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Violet
Lacey and I sit in chairs that massage our backs while we get our toes done.
“Skull and crossbones, on the big toe of each foot, please, Ms. Norma,” Lacey tells the nail technician.
Norma nods with a smile, then turns to me. “And you?”
“Do you have anything musical themed?”
Lacey answers before Norma can even open her mouth. “Notes, a treble clef, base clef, guitar, microphone and keyboard.”
“Sure I can’t lure you away from Tanaka’s, Lacey?” Norma asks. “We have the hardest time getting good help around here.”
Lacey glances from Norma to me, then back at Norma again. “Wyatt’s back and needs my help.”
Norma’s brows raise, then her chin dips. “Are the two of you dating now?”
“I’d like guitars on my big toes, too,” I practically shout, so Lacey doesn’t have to answer. Norma might be nice, but she strikes me as a gossip. God, I’m so channeling Nana right now.
Live For You (Boys of the South ~ Book 1) Page 15