by Scott, S. L.
“It’s a bad habit you need to break.”
When she looks up, her lips are twisted to the side. “You’ve got a few of your own.”
“Truer words were never spoken. Come on.”
In the bedroom, I strip off my clothes after leaving her in the bathroom, happy to be going to bed. “I’m exhausted.”
She comes back into the bedroom with a towel, a washrag, and a cup of water. “Lie down.”
“Are we playing nurse and patient?”
Her laugh is music, the melody one I know by heart. “You wish.”
“I do, on every star.”
Sitting next to me, she asks, “You waste your wishes on role play?”
“No. I spend all my wishes on you.”
“I hope they all come true.”
Kissing her on the cheek, I whisper, “They already have.”
“You’re very charming when you want to be.”
“I always wanna be with you.” I lie back as instructed. She dips the washrag in the cup. When she touches it to my face, she’s careful, but I still protest, “I’m not hurt.”
“You’re bleeding. That means you’re hurt.” I wince and get a hard glare. “What happened?”
“Some guys needed to flex their muscle to prove a point.”
“On your face?”
When I laugh, I wince again. “Fine. Maybe they did a little more damage than I first thought.”
Her gaze dips down my body. “Is that bruising on your ribs?”
“It doesn’t hurt that much. Surface bruising.”
“Did you get what you were after?”
“Guess we’ll find out tomorrow.”
She wipes across my forehead, keeping her eyes on the job at hand. “What’s tomorrow?”
“A party at Kingwood Enterprises. I want you to be there. Will you come?”
Her hand stops, the rag still pressed to the side of my eye. “I’m not sure I can make it.”
Taking hold of her hips, I wait until she finally makes eye contact to say, “I need you there, Firefly.”
“You’ll be fine.”
“Okay. I want you there.”
She sighs. “I have my group project.”
“Then come after.” I wiggle her hips. “Come to the party. Please.”
Setting the rag down and taking the towel, she pats my face. I open my eyes to find her searching my expression. “I’ll consider it.”
“That’s the second thing you’re having to consider. Any thoughts on the previous?”
She smiles, and I smile in response. “It’s only been a few hours.”
“And?”
“I need more time.”
“I want you with me. Every night. Every morning.”
“I practically am now.”
“Practically isn’t all the time.”
Her smile grows. “You make it hard to say no. You know that?”
“Actually, you’re the one who makes it hard.” I take her hand from my face and move it lower until she finds something harder to hold on to.
“How are you always ready for sex?”
“I was born for action.”
“I’m starting to believe you.” She stands with her nurse supplies in hand. “I think you’ll live. I hope the other guy got worse.”
“It was three of them.”
She scoffs. “Good God, Alexander. You’re lucky this was the only damage they did.”
“My bike got worse.” She rolls her eyes at that one, as I knew she would.
“Your bike can be replaced.” She walks to the bathroom. My pretty firefly floats like an angel back to me. The light is turned out, and she slips under the covers, careful when she slides against me. She whispers, “You can’t. Take care of yourself, okay?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
That earns me a poke to my ribs. “Ouch.”
“Oh damn, I forgot. I’m so sorry.”
As panic takes over, the apologies roll off her tongue, so I grab hold of her, welcoming the touch of her warm and soft skin. “I’m fine. Really. It’s okay.”
Laying her head on the pillow next to mine, she says, “I’m sorry.”
“You said it yourself. I’ll live.” Her lips warm my chest. My arm tightens around her. “Be with me, baby. Be with me always.”
She rolls to the side and looks at me. “I’m with you, Alexander. We’re one. Always one.” Rolling onto her back, her shoulder pressed to mine. Her hands are like a prayer as she rests her cheek on them. “I want to live with you.”
I’m tired. I’m delirious. I must have misheard, my ear still slightly ringing. I’m mentally and physically exhausted. “Really?”
“Really,” she replies with a solid smile, one stuck on love. I suspect mine’s similar.
“Best news I could get.” Looking at her, I lean over and kiss the tip of her nose. “What changed your mind?”
“You came over tonight.”
“That’s all it took?”
“Why did you come over?”
“Because you were here.”
“That’s all it took.” She kisses me gently and leans back again. The tips of her fingers run along my neck and over my shoulder before she rests her palm on my arm. “I shouldn’t say this because Lord knows you don’t need your ego inflated, but I’m going to anyway.”
“Hit me with the compliments, woman. My ego is the only thing not bruised tonight.”
“You’re more thoughtful than you let on. You’re gentler than you like to show the world. You’re not as tough as you want people to believe. It’s for all those reasons and a million more that I love being with you. So remember, you don’t have to wear your armor to bed. I love you, the man before me now.”
Her leg swings over mine, and she pulls herself closer.
“Ouch,” I mumble, wishing I could hide the pain better.
She lifts up, and strokes my hair from my forehead. “Aww, poor baby. I’ll take extra special care of you and help heal my wounded knight in shining armor.” Kissing my chest, she rests over my heart, her hand tapping to the beat. “So it’s us. Officially now.”
I cover her body by wrapping my arms around her. “There was never any other way. It was always together or nothing.”
“Seems that way.” The tips of her lashes brush against my chest when she closes her eyes. “Thank you for coming over tonight.”
“There’s no place I’d rather be.”
18
Alexander
Sara Jane is so fucking sweet to people who don’t give a shit about her. It’s me they care about. I’m the one they are more than willing to use. I call them friends, but they’re enemies disguised as friends. Cruise is the only one I trust.
I nod when I see him, but I’m not here to socialize. I’m here to make a point. She turns, a mix of worry crossing her face. “There are a lot of drugs.”
“You wanted to see how my friends party. This is how they party.”
“Some of the kids at school smoke weed.”
“Have you ever smoked?”
“You know I haven’t.” She playfully jabs me with her elbow.
“Let’s keep it that way.” I guide her through the living room, and into the kitchen where the large island is covered with bottles. “What do want to drink?” Grabbing a bottle of whiskey, I start pouring it into a crystal glass.
“I’ll have what you’re having.”
“Really?” I ask, surprised.
“When in Rome.” Looking around nervously, she adds, “C’est la vie.”
“That’s a lot of clichés you’ve got going there. You okay?”
“Fine.” Her voice pitches, and then frustration sets in, and she clears her throat. “I’m fine. Just give me the damn whiskey.”
“Damn whiskey,” I repeat, teasing her. “Probably wise. It’s the only way to survive these parties.” I grab another glass and pour the liquid in before adding a dash of Coke to each glass.
Another drink later, I do what I hoped I
wouldn’t, but knew I would. Sara Jane is too pure, too good. She’s lethal in ways that weaken me. I have to be strong. I can’t be with her, and yet my fucking emotions are messing with me. This girl. She fucking owns me—heart and soul, but I still go, leading her reluctantly up the stairs. The alcohol has made her tipsy and her body’s relaxed, trusting me . . . so fucking foolish.
Don’t do this. Don’t do this.
Not to her. She’s good and I’m going to ruin her.
I’ll ruin her worse if she stays with me. I’m going to use immature fucking psychology tricks on her. Make her leave me because I’m too weak to leave her.
I turn against any good that might be left in me and look into her entrusting doe eyes. She asks, “Where are we going?”
“I’ve wanted you since I saw you.”
A sweet smile appears. “Aw.”
“Not aw. I wanted to do things to you, to take things from you.”
Her smile fades. “Like what, Alexander?”
“You keep asking if I want you and why we haven’t made love.”
“Well, yeah. We’ve dated for months, and we’ve not gotten past first base. The rejection hurts.”
“I want you, Firefly. I do, so much. But if we do . . .” That’s it for me. Am I ready to be everything she needs in life? I can’t even fucking take care of myself, and she’ll need me. She’ll need me to protect her because she only sees the good in the world. She only sees the good in me. I’m about to prove her wrong. “Please tell me to take you home. Tell me you want to leave or you have a headache. Tell me anything that will keep me from taking you up these stairs.”
Glancing up the staircase, she asks, “What’s up there that you don’t want me to see?”
“Some of the bad I want to keep from you.”
“You brought me this far. You obviously want to go up there.”
“I don’t. I thought I did, but I don’t.”
“But you will?” Yes. Because that’s the sorry ass I am.
Nodding, I reply, “I will. So tell me to take you home. Do anything to keep me from fucking you like you’re a girl I don’t care about instead of the one I do.”
Her lips fall apart and her pupils widen. When she looks up the staircase again, she asks, “But you like it?”
“No, but I live in a world where things aren’t coming up roses. It’s dirty and twisted. I want you to have a better life.” I tell her the truth as I touch her cheek. “Because you’ve changed me for the better.”
“We’re better because we’re together.”
Drunk confidence makes her push her shoulders back and tits out, digging deep for some false bravado. “I’m not afraid of seeing whatever it is. I’m afraid of losing you, and if you don’t get what you need, that will happen.” Wrapping her arms around my neck, she says, “I’ve been eighteen for months. I want to have sex with you, Alexander.” My name is slurred. “I’m ready. Why don’t you want me?”
“I do, baby. More than you’ll ever know, but I also know I’m no good for you.”
“It can’t be that bad.”
She can’t hold her liquor. I like that she can’t. Not because I want her drunk, but that she’s completely opposite from every girl at this party. That’s one of the more obvious reasons she’s better than all of them.
The class president from my senior year passes us. “Getting lucky, Kingwood?” A girl who used to stalk me in the halls is hanging on him like she’s hanging on to his words.
Sara Jane replies for both of us, “He is.”
I kind of want to smile with pride, she’s off balance and leans a little too far to the right. “You okay?”
“More than okay.” Her lips reach my ear, and she whispers, “I’ve seen porn before. Is it dirty like that?”
“It’s dirty like that.” Dirtier, but I want her to see with her own eyes. I want to taint her innocence to make her strong. She’ll need that strength to be with me. The debate is dead and buried. I was never going to take her home before destroying the last of her innocence. I kiss her hard before carrying her up the rest of the stairs. At the top, I press her against the wall, pressing my cock against her as my tongue invades her mouth. Her lips are fucking divine, her tongue coaxing more than mine to touch her in ways that I’ve not touched her before. An ounce of guilt strikes, and I pull back. “Fuck, I shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Don’t stop this time. I’m so wet for you.”
No fucking way I can ignore that from my sweet, innocent vixen. I kiss her again and her leg wraps around one of mine.
The hall’s too crowded. I need to get her out of here alone before I fuck her right here. “Come on.” I take her hand and lead her down the hall. When we reach the bedroom, I stop in front of the open door and then place her in front of me.
When she sees inside, she tries to take a step back, but I hold her in place. She attempts to turn away, but with my lips to her ear this time, I say, “I want you to watch.” I keep my tone firm, knowing she needs to see this. She needs to see how crass my life can be.
The class president is fucking my stalker on the bed. The girl’s tits are bouncing in reaction, but she likes putting on a show, well aware of the eyes on her. People are standing around the room, some watching, some not. Cruise comes from the bathroom and sits on a chair in the corner. The girl he was kissing earlier kneels before him while he watches the action on the bed.
Shifting her over for more coverage from the inside, our bodies are blocked by the door. There’s no way in fucking hell I’m letting anyone see my girl get off but me. Sara Jane’s breathing changes, lengthening. I slide my hands over her ribs and higher until I’m squeezing her breasts. “Alexander.” Her voice teeters between lust and a warning.
“It’s okay, baby. Nobody cares what we’re doing,” I lie. “Touch me.” Her hand comes around and rubs over my dick. “Yeah, just like that. Such a good girl. That feels so good.” With my cheek to hers, I can tell her eyes have closed. She’s letting the sensations take over. The girl on the bed grabs her own tits, pinching her nipples while watching us. I pinch Sara Jane’s through the thin satin material of her bra, which elicits a groan filled with desire. “Open your eyes and watch.” My voice is gruff, laden with need.
With her eyes open again, she sees the girl looking at her, watching us, and Sara Jane’s chest begins to heave, but she makes no move to leave. I slide my hand under the back of her dress and into the top of her panties. When I reach her wet pussy, she bucks back. “People can see us.”
“I know.” I dip a finger inside her tight pussy. She’s so fucking turned on and God, do I fucking want her like I’ve never wanted anything before. From how wet she is, it won’t take long to get her off. I sink deeper receiving a lustful moan in return. I start fucking her with my hand while her hand dives deep into my jeans. “Fuck, Firefly, make me come.”
The girl on the bed looks our way. “I’ve missed you, Alex.”
Sara Jane freezes.
Whipping her to the side until her back hits the wall, I press my lips to hers. “I want you so much. Only you.” I hurry her down the hall to the nearest bathroom and lock us inside.
My patience is gone, my hands are under her bra, and I have a pert pink nipple in my mouth when she asks, “You could have had sex with her if you wanted?”
A question. “I don’t want her. I want you.”
“Never?”
“Never what?” Licking the skin between her breasts, my hand fumbles with her dress. I want it fucking off.
“You’ve never been with her?”
I slow. This is what I wanted, right? To freak her out? To turn her on? Why the fuck did I bring her here? “No way, but every guy back in school was. She always got off on people watching.”
“And you’ve watched before?”
Stopping, I stand up so she can see the truth in my eyes. “I’ve watched. I was high as a kite, but I watched.”
“Since we’ve been together?”
“Yes.
”
“That’s why you didn’t bring me here before? To your friends’ parties?”
“I told you,” I say, sneaking in a kiss, “they aren’t people I consider friends, but they’re the people I grew up with.”
“Cruise is here. He’s one of them.”
“He would say I am too.”
“Are you?”
“I was. I don’t want this life with them. I want to spend it with you.”
A small smile appears. She looks down, the flush of her cheeks darkening. “It turned me on, Alexander. Does that make me a bad person?”
I caress her cheek and smirk. “God, no. It means you’re good.” I drop to my knees to fuck her clit with my tongue. “So good, but I’ll make you feel even better.”
. . . I wake up sweating. I kick the sheet down and look over to find an empty bed.
“You were having a nightmare.”
Sitting up on my elbows, Sara Jane is curled in a chair in the corner of the room. “I was?”
“Yeah, you kicked me. Twice. I tried to wake you, but you pinned me down. You’re strong even in your sleep.” She sips from a mug.
“I’m sorry.”
“You were dreaming about that night.” She leaves it there. Neither of us needing more to know which night she’s referring to.
Looking away from her in shame, I whisper, “Yeah.”
She exhales through her nose, then takes another sip before setting the mug on the dresser and crawling back into bed. “And yet I’m still here.” Lying back, she pulls the covers over her and then tugs on my arm. “Maybe one day you’ll have sweet dreams of us instead.”
I’ve had many sweet dreams with Sara Jane as the star. How could I not? When my head hits the pillow, I reply, “Sometimes wishes come true.”
19
Sara Jane
Before Alexander leaves, he comes to my side of the bed and kneels down. “I need to go to the manor to get ready for work, but think about tonight, okay?”
I’m tired, still sleepy in the six o’clock hour, but I’m honest. “I will.”