She inhaled once, blowing her breath out a second later, the sound like nails on a chalkboard.
But her shaking hands as she reached for her coat finally forced me to look at her face.
She wasn’t supposed to be shaking. Was supposed to be sated and satisfied. And her dark eyes were filled with a blank emotion, one I understood all too well. One that twisted my gut even worse than when I’d been waiting for her to show up tonight. She wore a mask, hiding her true feelings, which meant she was either pissed at me or hurt. My guess was both.
“See you in a week.” I swallowed hard, knowing I was being a douche, knowing I’d crossed a line I couldn’t uncross.
“No.”
I narrowed my eyes. “What’d you say?”
“No, you won’t see me next week.” Her movements were jerky as she slipped on her coat and hat, then her gloves. I loved those damn gloves.
“What do you mean? I thought we had a deal.”
“That deal is null and void now,” she growled.
“You’re kidding, right?” I knew she wasn’t. I’d screwed up, big time. I took a step forward, reaching up to cup her cheek but stopping short when she stiffened. “I’m sorry.”
“I should have known this is why you wanted me over. To prove just how not desperate you are by keeping it in your pants. You’re a twisted asshole, you know that?”
And then she was gone, opening and slamming the door in my face, leaving me behind and even more messed up in the head than before.
Chapter 12
Addison
Two and a half weeks went by without a word from Collin, not that I was expecting him to call. If anything, I wasn’t ever expecting to see or hear from him again. I’d avoided the Java Java Hut altogether for fear I’d run into one of his cronies, or possibly his sister.
Luckily, June’s Waffle House had called me, saying they were desperate and willing to train me, so the waitressing gig was a go. Carinthia’s one and only greasy-spoon diner wasn’t my dream job, especially since I made crappy tips and minimum wage. But I was surviving, and even though I was barely getting by, I wasn’t suffering for naught. Once I’d pleaded my case with my landlord and told him my issues, he’d told me he’d give me another week to find a job. And once I did, I’d have to show him proof of employment and agree to pay in weekly installments over the next few months until I got back on my feet. It’d be rough, but at least I wasn’t on the streets.
Today, I’d worked ten straight hours. Thursdays weren’t the best for tips, but I’d gotten my first paycheck, so that was something.
Exhausted, I sat in front of my TV, prepared to do a little binge watching on Netflix. It was cheaper than cable and played some of my favorite classics. It wasn’t five minutes into me time, though, when I received a call.
“This Addison?”
I leaned forward to grab the remote, then turned down the volume. “This is.”
“It’s Gavin. Gavin St. James, Collin Montgomery’s friend. Remember me?”
“Um, yeah…?” I had no idea what to say or why he’d call me in the first place.
“I’ve got a problem.”
And then I heard it. The unmistakable sound of a baby crying in the background.
“Everything okay? Is that Chloe?” I stood, my skin crawling as I walked into my kitchen. The clock on the microwave said eleven, and with it being Thursday, I knew Collin was at work.
“I don’t usually watch her alone. I mean, I love the kid like my own, but babies kind of freak me out.”
He cleared his throat, the sound of his breath heavy and echoing over the line. I could hear him talking to Chloe, his voice soft and shaking. Something was wrong, but why in the hell was he calling me about it?
“Gavin?” I grabbed my keys off the table and pocketed them. Phone between my cheek and shoulder, I snagged the ponytail holder from around my wrist and threw my hair up in a messy bun.
“I need some help. I, shit, I think she’s sick, and I can’t get hold of anyone else.” I heard him again, speaking in softer tones, the sound making my heart beat fast and my stomach twist. She cried, then coughed hard, and then he muttered, “Fuck!”
And that’s when I knew. My instincts had me running toward my front door and slipping on my tennis shoes. I was out of my apartment and down the steps in less than twenty seconds. Then in my car in less than three.
“She just puked all over me. Ahh, Beaner. I’m sorry, kiddo.”
“Have you called Collin?” In the driver’s seat, I put my phone on hands free and drove quickly from the parking lot onto the street.
“So gross,” Gavin mumbled. Not only was Chloe hysterical, but she was coughing too.
My hands tightened around the steering wheel. “Have you called her dad?” I repeated.
“No, damn it. He left his phone at home. I have no way to get ahold of him.”
Anger pushed the words out as I said, “If you can’t handle watching a sick baby for one night, then why are you doing it?”
“Because she wasn’t sick when I started, and I was the only one available to watch her. You are the one who ditched out on him, remember?”
My eyes went wide. What the what? No telling what kind of bullshit Collin had been feeding his friend, but that didn’t matter—Chloe did. “Keep her upright. Don’t lay her down. And do not leave her unattended, no matter what.” I clenched my jaw, fighting against the frustration pulsing through my veins.
Collin was the one who’d kissed me first. Collin also initiated the hump-a-thon against his door. Not to mention he then basically tossed me to the side like a used condom, breaking my pride and pissing me off.
“Keep her upright,” Gavin panted. “Don’t leave her alone. Got it.”
“Can you call Lia?”
“Her cell phone’s disconnected and I don’t know the name of the bar she works at either. Max is out of town for family stuff, so I’m it.” He groaned, and Chloe began to cry again. “Shit, I can’t do this.” At his words, I immediately pressed my foot harder against the gas pedal.
“You don’t have a choice,” I grumbled, running two yellow lights in a row. “I’m almost there.”
“Thank you,” he whispered, the words barely audible.
Two minutes ago he was bashing on me, and now he was thanking me. I wondered if Collin and Gavin drank from the same water—the roller-coaster-of-emotions kind.
I hung up and parked on the street a few houses down from theirs. It was a quiet, family neighborhood, something I hadn’t really noticed when I’d come by the other two times I’d been here. There again, I wasn’t the type to pay attention to detail either.
Chest tight, I walked up to the door and lifted my hand to knock. But before my knuckles hit the wood, the door was flung open, making way for a frazzled, messy-haired man covered in sweat and a red-faced baby with tears rolling down her face.
“Hey, peanut.” Without meeting Gavin’s eyes, I reached for Chloe, throat tight when she immediately snuggled against my chest. She was hot, and not just sweaty, but fever-hot and shaking. I’d worked around children enough to know when one had a temperature.
I pushed past Gavin and headed into the living room. Memories of what had happened at the door behind me tried to push their way inside my head, but Chloe’s little fingers grabbed my hair, distracting me. She hiccupped, squirming, her skin like fire at my touch, and I nearly melted at the feeling—how she relaxed so easily in my hold. Her little heart raced as fast as mine, and I felt my eyes burn with tears.
“I’m going to take her pajamas off. I want you to look for a thermometer. If she has a fever, you’ll need to get ahold of her pediatrician to find out what we should give her and, if anything, how much of it we should give.” There was no way I was going to give her anything without a professional’s opinion. No telling what her father would say—or do—if
I did.
“Okay,” Gavin whispered in a rush. “She’s got meds for teething in the bathroom, I think. And a thermometer in her room in a basket with all her diapers.”
“On it.” Still not looking in his direction, I made my way toward her room. There was only one thing on my mind—making the little girl in my arms comfortable.
“Hey, sweet thing. I’m gonna help you feel all better, okay?” I lowered her onto the changing table in her room, wincing as she grabbed and tugged at my hair. Instant tears filled her big, blue eyes as I let her go. Not wanting her to cry, I reached over and grabbed a stuffed animal off her rocking chair, laying it next to her for a distraction. And even though I knew I sang like a dying hyena, I began to do it anyway as I slipped her onesie off.
Five minutes later, she’d stopped crying but Gavin was still MIA and her shaking was only getting worse. Her eyes were wide as she studied me in the nearly dark room, but there was a sort of vacancy in them at the same time.
Not finding the thermometer, I decided I was done waiting and walked out into the dining room, Chloe snuggled in my arms. Through the breakfast nook, I could see a shirtless Gavin on the phone in the kitchen, yelling at whoever was on the other end.
“…and I don’t care if I have to come over to that bastard’s house and wake his ass up myself. Somebody has got to call me back, damn it. And soon.” With an angry growl, he slammed his cell phone down and dipped his chin. He’d yet to meet my eyes, but I couldn’t exactly move away from watching him.
Not knowing what else to do, I eventually whispered, “Everything okay?”
He jumped in place as he looked at me through the breakfast nook. “Fine.” He straightened his back and walked out of the kitchen. “Is she okay? Did you find the thermometer?”
I swallowed hard. He looked fierce, but in a protective way. “No. Did you get hold of the doctor?”
“No. Just the answering service.”
“That’s who you were just talking to?”
His jaw flexed, but he stayed quiet and bent over to kiss Chloe’s temple. Her head was on my shoulder, her hands curled in my hair.
“I’m sorry, Chloe Bean. Uncle Gavvy is so sorry.”
I had a feeling he was saying sorry for a lot more than just her not feeling good. There was something about this Gavin character that broke my heart and made me almost fear him at the same time.
“Listen, I don’t usually panic. I just…” He took a step back, rubbing both of his hands over his face. “I can’t handle it when things don’t go my way, ya know? When I can’t fix something…”
I nodded for his sake, not knowing what to say. This man obviously had some underlying issues. From what I remember Collin telling me, this guy was an EMT, an ex-medic, for God’s sake. One would think he’d be a little more in control when it came to a child with a fever. Before I could even begin to dissect his issues though, his cell phone rang.
Shaking his head, Gavin ran back toward the kitchen, composed and determined once again.
“Okay, sweetie, we can get through this,” I murmured to Chloe, swaying her in my arms.
I walked toward the couch in the living room, sat down, and pulled a blanket over both of us. Her little body still shivered, even as she snuggled against me.
Gavin came back into the room, his brows pressed together and a pad of paper in his hands. “Without a thermometer, we can’t tell if she has a fever, so I’m going to run to my place and grab one. We’re supposed to hold it under her arm and then add a degree.” He seemed to be reading from his paper, tone controlled, his composure in place. “If she has a fever, we’re to give her a teaspoon of baby ibuprofen, and then the fever should go down within a half hour.”
I stroked the back of Chloe’s head, releasing my bottom lip from between my teeth. “And if it doesn’t?”
He met my stare, his eyes blank. “I don’t have a clue.”
Chapter 13
Collin
The first thing I noticed when I walked into my house that morning was how quiet it was. There was no TV on. No clanking of dishes or rattling of toys. Wasn’t like Chloe not to be awake at this hour, since she was always up at six, no matter what time she went to bed the night before.
Frowning, I undid my belt and slung it over the dining room table. Needed to piss but needed to check on my girl more. No telling how last night went with Gavin. And since I’d been a dumbass and left my phone at home, I’d had no way to call and check on them. Still, if he had any issues, I knew he had Lia’s number on hand for backup.
It was the first time Gavin had stayed alone with her without Max here to help. But Max had to go out of town for some family stuff. And because he’d been the one taking care of my girl whenever I worked, since he was now between jobs until next month, I was stuck without another option. Up until Gavin stepped in. Surprised the hell out of me too. Never once had he offered to watch her by himself, always insisting someone be with him, just in case. But Chloe loved him and he was responsible, so that’s all I needed to know to feel good about leaving the two of them alone.
Burned-out and tired from the night, I slumped down the hall to Chloe’s room, feet nearly dragging. I wasn’t the type to need a lot of sleep, but sometimes a nap was in order when I worked nights. I wondered if Chloe would let me sneak one in.
The door to her room was ajar, and a soft snore that wasn’t hers came from inside. The hinges creaked as I pushed the door open. My eyes widened at the view. On the floor, sleeping, was Gavin, while in the rocking chair, with my girl pressed against her chest as she moved back and forth, was the last person I least expected to see.
Addison.
Hands clenched at my side, I whispered, “Addie? What are you doing here?”
Her eyes popped open, all wide and surprised, yet she didn’t stop rocking—just looked at me with hooded lids as she rubbed my baby’s back.
I took another step closer.
Gavin grumbled and sat up, rubbing his eyes with the back of his knuckles. “Good morning, dumbass,” he hissed and then stood. Eye to eye, he met my stare, more pissed than I’d ever seen him.
“What the hell did I do?” I took another step toward Chloe—toward her.
“Out of the room. Now.” Gavin grabbed my arm, pulling me back.
“No. I wanna see my daughter. Get off me.” I pushed him away, reaching Addison. She stiffened at my outstretched arm, but her protective hold on my daughter had my insides twisting the most.
“You don’t wanna do that, man,” Gavin warned. “We just got her to sleep like a half hour ago. She’s been up all night.”
Jaw locked, I glanced at Addison again. Her gaze was down this time, watching my girl with softened features. My heart skipped. Seeing her like that made me feel things I shouldn’t.
My fingers itched to swoop my baby up and hold her against me, but then Gavin pressed his hand against my shoulder, his voice hoarse.
“Give her time to put Chloe down. I’ll explain in the living room.”
Instead of doing like Gavin asked, I watched Addison, daring her to look at me again.
But she never did.
Scared out of my mind, I followed Gavin into the hall and went to sit on the couch with him.
“What’s she doing here? What happened?”
Gavin turned to face me, dark shadows under his eyes and anger like a bomb ready to explode in his stare. I swallowed hard, not having seen this look on his face before.
“You forget something last night?”
“Yeah, my phone.”
“And, what, you couldn’t come back and get it? Call me from a landline and let me know?” Gavin rubbed his hand over his throat. The guy looked like shit.
“Damn, I’m sorry. It was a long-ass night, and the department’s phone lines were down. You had Lia’s number if something went wrong. Why didn’t you call
her?”
He scoffed and stood up. “Yeah. That number she gave you? Disconnected. Couldn’t get hold of anyone. All Chloe did was cry and cry. She wouldn’t stop. And then she started puking and shaking. About broke my heart because I couldn’t do anything for her.”
“What’s wrong with her?” My insides burned in fear as I took in his face. “Tell me.” I turned, ready to go back in Chloe’s room, but Gav grabbed my arm.
“Nothing anymore.” His jaw flexed back and forth. “Called Wonder Woman in there. She took care of things.” My nails dug into my palm at the mention of Addie. “Found her number on the fridge. Got desperate. She came. Fixed things. End of story.”
“Shit. I’m sorry, Gav.” And I was, so damn much.
He threw his head back and rubbed a hand down over his face. “It’s fine. I mean, Chloe’s obviously better now, but six hours ago I was seconds away from taking her to the ER. All that puking and crying…”
I shut my eyes and lowered my chin to my chest. Chloe had never been sick before. Nearly ten months old and hadn’t even had a cold, for God’s sake. So what were the odds it’d happen on the night when Gavin watched her on his own for the first time?
“You should’ve gotten your ass in the car and driven down to my work. Told me. I would’ve left and come home.”
I knew as soon I said the words how much of an idiot I sounded like. No way would I want him to drive my screaming baby to see me, not when she didn’t feel good. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, he’d done the right thing by calling Addison.
“Are you that dumb?” Her voice sounded from behind, an angry whisper that had me cringing.
I turned to face her, ready to say my piece, man up, and apologize, but Gavin jumped in between us.
“Thank you for coming by and helping me out. Couldn’t have gotten through it without you.” Before I could call him out on the flip of his mood, he had his hands around her waist, hugging her to his chest.
My back went ramrod straight, and I bit the inside of my cheek, wondering what the hell someone had done with my best friend. Gavin wasn’t a hugger, yet there he was, hugging the one person he’d sworn was no good for me or Chloe.
Reckless Hearts Series, Book 1 Page 8