by Sam Crescent
“Look around you, everyone is freaked,” Sinner said. “Even I’m finding it fucking hard. Kids are hurting, our women, and our men are all in pain.”
“We’re in the safest place for them. Now, I’m listening to Miles read, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t interrupt him.”
Stink leaned forward, but Sinner, Dick, and Martha stayed with them. Hours passed until Sandy finally came toward them, and she actually had a chart in front of her.
Gash got to his feet as did Ripper.
“Everyone is doing okay at the moment,” she said. “I’ve got a list of everything that is going on. First, Sunshine gave birth to a little girl. Alex should be waking up soon. He got a bullet to the thigh that they had to remove. The anesthetic should be wearing off soon. He’ll be grouchy, but that is his personality, so yay.
“Phoebe is doing okay. Her vitals are good, but she had a bullet to the shoulder. Murphy and Fighter are doing okay. Each had a gunshot wound to the stomach. The damage has been repaired, but they need to be checked to make sure there are no leaks with the repair job.”
Tate sighed in relief, bending down to hug her Simon. “Thank God.”
Sandy nodded, going back to her list. “Blaine will be out tomorrow after they’ve ran some tests. The bullet took his ear, but the doctors are hopeful of no permanent damage. Curse is fine, only a few stitches needed. However, Mia lost a lot of blood, and needed a transfusion. She’s doing okay but needs to have an eye kept on her.”
Each person she spoke about left Stink more relieved. They had lost a couple of people, but it seemed they were mostly injured.
“Sally,” Sandy said, and stopped, licking her lips. He saw how hard this was for her. “She’s, um, they may have to amputate from her knee down. The bullet caused too much damage. They have repaired as much as they could in an attempt to keep her leg, but it’s not looking good. The risk of infection is too high.”
“Fuck,” Gash said.
“Yeah, she’s not handling that well.”
Lacey and Whizz leaned against each other, and he saw Daisy between them. “We’ll go to her, take Daisy with us.”
Stink watched as Anthony rushed over and hugged Daisy tightly to him.
The Skulls kids were fucking weird.
“Steven is with her now, but you’re going to need for her to go through with this.”
“What about Simon and Tabitha?” Ripper asked.
“They were both shot and have suffered concussions. We’re waiting for them to wake up.”
“Sasha? What’s going on with her?” Brianna asked.
Once again Sandy looked sick. “She lost a lot of blood, and … she’s not waking up.”
“Is she dead?” Death asked.
“No, she’s not dead, and she’s also not brain dead. Her mind is showing activity, but she should have woken up by now. The doctor who treated her head wound before believes there may be an underlying condition. We’re running tests to make sure.”
“If anything happens to her, Pussy won’t be the same. It’ll kill him,” Death said.
“Keep an eye on her.”
“What about Angel?” Gash asked.
“She’s having contractions, and the doctors are trying to ease them without inducing labor.” Angel still had another six weeks to go before she gave birth. “That’s it for now.”
Many of them may not have died, but they had lost a great deal. He couldn’t imagine being in Sally’s position right now.
Stink moved forward, taking hold of Sandy’s hand, and leading her away from all of the questions. She didn’t need this now.
He walked into the bathroom, he shut and locked the door.
“Breathe, it’s okay. You’re okay. It’s just us.”
“It’s not okay. I’m not okay. I can’t give them all the answers they need. I can’t save them.”
“I know. It’s not your job, okay? All you have to do is take care of them, help them, that’s it. You’re not God, nor are you a miracle worker.”
Pulling her to him, Stink held her tightly before she finally let go. As a doctor she had the training to keep all the fear and all the panic at bay. Once that was over, only a shell remained, and he was determined to break through that shell she’d created. He was not going to allow Sandy to be forgotten.
“The bullets, Stink, they’ve hurt our friends, our family. I want to kill him.”
“We will.”
“Sally’s going to lose her leg, and she’s going to need to practice with a prosthetic. She’s only just getting her life back, and already part of it is being taken away. Tabitha and Simon, what if something goes wrong? Sasha, she’s blind, and she’s not waking up. They believe there is pressure building on her brain. There’s so much that can go wrong, and I can’t fix everything.”
He pulled away, cupping her face. “Look at me.”
Her eyes were full of tears, and seeing them was breaking him apart. “I can’t help them.”
“You’re not God, Sandy. You’re not God. You don’t control who lives and who dies. You’re Sandy. You’re a doctor who helps. You’re helping.”
She nodded.
“No one can do what you can do. You’re strong.”
Sandy shook her head. “No, I’m not. I’m weak.”
Stink slammed his lips down on hers. It was not the appropriate time, and probably not the response she was looking for, but it was all he had. Those moments of the bullets firing had nearly killed him. He hadn’t been near Sandy. He’d been near Eva, and so had taken her down just before Tiny reached them.
“I thought I’d lost you,” Stink said. “I was scared one of those bullets had taken you away from me.” He let his own tears show.
“I’m not good enough for you, Stink.”
“You are, and I’m going to prove it to you.” He wiped away her tears. “You’re one of the strongest women I know.”
She forced a laugh. “I’m not. I know a lot of stronger women who have faced a hell of a lot more than I have. I’m not strong at all. I couldn’t survive the loss of a child. Angel and Charlotte have been through that. Fuck, Lacey can’t even have kids. They’re strong women, Stink, not me. I just fuck.”
He pressed his hand against her chest. “You have faced more horrors within these four walls than any of The Skulls and Chaos Bleeds combined. You keep your shit together, and you don’t fail. That, to me, is strong. You’re a strong woman, and together, we’re going to help our club, our family to make it whole.”
“I want to kill him, Stink. I want to plunge a knife into his cold chest, and watch him bleed. I want him to beg, and only feel pain as I hurt him some more.” She’d been staring off somewhere past his shoulder. “I took a vow to do no harm to anyone, and yet I want to murder, and I intend to enjoy it when it happens.”
“I’ll make sure your vow is never broken.” He kissed her lips. Sandy was a good woman. No matter what Andrew did, Sandy wouldn’t be able to take his life. There were two clubs, though, that were planning on it. Between the two of them, Andrew was going down. They were together now, fighting against him. They would win. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“Don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not going to be fine right away, Stink. You know that better than anyone.”
He kissed her temple. “Don’t try to hide this from me. The club, we’ll get through it together.”
“He’s not going to stop though. This is just the beginning.”
“It’s the beginning, and we’re going to fight. He caught us unawares, but none of us are going to make that mistake again.”
She opened her mouth to speak, and then closed it again. “What?”
“Andrew attacks anyone. Men, women, children, there is no end.”
“You’re afraid?”
“Aren’t you?”
Stink nodded. “I am. Andrew is a deranged bastard, but we’ve got Gash.”
She licked her lips, and shook her head. “Even with
him, Gash didn’t know this was going to happen. Gash is not deranged. He’s vicious, two different things. We don’t know what he’s doing to do next, and it scares me.”
“I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”
“I don’t care what happens to me. It’s everyone else, including you.” Sandy stared at his chest, and she ran her hand across the lapel of his leather jacket. “I can’t lose you, not now.”
“I’ll be careful.”
“Promise?”
“Yes. I love you, Sandy.” He’d been in love with this woman since the first moment he saw her. At the time he’d been enjoying club pussy, and had refused to sleep with her. Sandy had never tried to garner his attention, or his affection, but she’d gotten it without even trying. He loved her. She was part of his life, and he was never going to let her go.
She never told him that she loved him, but he could wait.
Sandy was skittish. Push too hard, and she’d run.
Stink had waited a long time, so a few more months, even years wouldn’t matter. He wasn’t going anywhere, and neither was she.
****
The words were on the tip of her tongue, yet Sandy couldn’t say them. It wasn’t because she didn’t feel them, because she did. She loved Stink. He’d become her whole world, and she found herself seeking him for comfort. At night, she lay in bed and wondered if he was thinking of her.
Her whole life had been about finding pleasure, not caring where it came from. She never needed sweet words, chocolates, flowers, or a steady relationship. In The Skulls, she’d found friends, loved ones, a family.
Being with Stink the past few years, she had found herself yearning for something she believed at one time she’d never need. She’d witnessed so many relationships fail through cheating or death. Being a doctor, she’d seen many people become inconsolable at the thought of being alone, without their loved one.
Even in The Skulls, she saw the rare kind of love that was only supposed to happen fleetingly, or at least so the good books say. Angel and Lash, their love was so strong, so powerful that it made her envious of what they shared. The moment Angel walked into a room, Lash searched for her. He couldn’t go long without touching or kissing her, the slight caresses carrying a huge meaning of his love as he did. It was hard not to wish for something like that.
She could go on with each couple, even Tate and Murphy. That woman was a first class bitch, and yet she’d seen the way Tate melted when Murphy was near. For the right man, Tate’s bitchiness ceased to exist. Sandy hadn’t believed it, and even questioned Murphy. He’d simply told her that no one knew the real Tate, the one he loved.
Leaving the bathroom, Sandy felt better, whole, like she could handle anything that was thrown at her.
“Where was Celia?” Sandy asked.
The young sister had been put in their care after Andrew dumped her. Paris, the older sister, and the one Spider was trying to hunt, was still missing. Celia wasn’t a problem. She missed her sister, but she’d accepted them and their care.
“She’s back home with Millie and Baker. They’re taking care of her, and keeping an eye on the clubhouse.”
“I’m going to go do my rounds. I’ll see you back at the clubhouse?”
“None of us are going to leave until Devil and Lash come down. We’ve got to regroup, and be strong.”
“We can’t leave them in the hospital alone,” Sandy said. “It’s too easy to get to them.”
“Exactly. The Skulls and Chaos Bleeds will be here until everyone has been discharged. Including me, I’ll be here for you.”
She nodded. “Thank you.”
“Go on. Go save some lives.”
Sandy turned, and left the two clubs to wait as she made her way back into the hospital. The first ward she got to was the emergency room where Jessica, Snake’s old lady, was bandaged up.
“How are you doing?”
“Wishing I could fucking help. I didn’t put myself through school and train to be a nurse to get fucking shot and be useless. I should be helping, only now, I can’t help. Best I can do is assist, and with the medication they’ve given me, I can’t do that.”
“You sound a little pissed,” Sandy said.
“I am pissed. I’ve been shot. I’m not exactly happy about that.” Jessica blew out a breath. “I’m so fucking angry right now. My arm hurts, and I’m going to have to have some kind of shot. I’m pissed off. Not to mention that some fucker thinks he can just shoot at us.”
Sandy chuckled. “You’re fighting, then?”
“Aren’t you? I know I am. I’m not going to take shit from anyone. Especially not a fucked up guy, and not from him.”
Jessica stared down at her arm, and Sandy saw the pain in her eyes.
“I completely forgot. You were taken by Andrew, Master.”
“Yeah, I was taken by him, and he left me there to die. He’s now shot at me. It may not have been him pulling the trigger, but it was him that ordered the kill. I want him dead. I don’t want any other woman to go through what I’ve gone through.”
“He has a woman right now.”
“I know. We’ve got to get her back. He tries to break minds, and in doing that, he breaks bodies, and tries to shatter our souls. No one can survive something like that. No one.”
“Jessica!” Snake rounded the curtain and grabbed her. Sandy watched as he claimed her lips, kissing her deeply. “I couldn’t fucking find you.”
“Why didn’t you ask Sandy?”
“I couldn’t find her. I’ve been looking all over this fucking hospital.”
“I’m sorry. I should have known to come find you. I apologize.”
Snake wasn’t interested in hearing her apology, and seeing as she was no longer needed, Sandy left them alone.
Rubbing her temple, she started to make her rounds, going to Sophia’s room. Jessica was going to be discharged and was no longer at risk. Providing she rested, her arm was going to be fine.
Nash was sitting beside his woman, who still hadn’t woken up.
“What’s going on?” Sandy asked, seeing the doctor filling in the form. Doctor Berman was one of the best surgeons in Fort Wills.
“Nothing. We’ve repaired the damage, but Sophia stopped breathing twice during surgery. Now we have to wait for any possible brain damage that could occur.”
“What do you think the chances of her not recovering? She has two kids, Berman.”
“Sandy, I respect you, and even though I don’t agree with your decision to step down from your position here, you know I can’t answer that.”
She did, but it would have been nice to hear some kind of hope, and told him so.
“Why don’t you retake your position here?” Berman asked.
“I’m not ready to return.”
“You’re a gifted doctor, a fantastic woman. Tell me what more would it take to get you to return.”
Sandy smiled. “I think that is the most compliments you’ve ever given me.”
“Well, let’s just say your replacements are proving less than savory. You were dependable, even at the end of a day. Also, my wife misses hearing about you.”
She chuckled.
“She wants to know if you’ve met a nice young man yet?”
“You can tell her that I have. I’m even thinking of settling down.”
“What about coming back here? The place hasn’t been the same without you.”
“I don’t know. I’d have to think about it.”
“Think about it.” Berman patted her arm. “With regards to the young woman, hope and pray.”
Letting out a sigh, she entered Sophia’s room.
“Don’t worry, I heard everything. I know the risks. I know what could happen to Sophia. She could end up brain dead, and my wife could be nothing more than a memory.”
Out of all of the club brothers Nash had struggled with addiction, and gone down a road that had almost cost him his life, and his position within the club. Lash had saved him. Lash
and Sophia had both helped to turn his life around.
“There’s nothing anyone can do.”
“She’ll come back to me. Sophia won’t leave me,” Nash said.
Moving toward him, she placed a hand on his shoulder. “We’ve just got to wait.”
“Yep, that is what we’ve got to do. Wait, and she’ll be back.”
Sandy stayed with him for several minutes before she moved on to the next person. There were so many people to see. It was so hard, going through the motions, and not breaking down in the face of her best friends hurting. Sasha lay in her bed, and Pussy was there, by her side.
“How is she?”
“She’s still breathing,” Pussy said. “I’m a stupid fucker. I shouldn’t have pushed her that hard. When the shooting started, I saw a bullet hit her. She panicked because she couldn’t fucking see.” He held onto Sasha’s hand. “She couldn’t see, and she nearly fucking died. I shouldn’t have shoved her to the floor. I heard it smack the fucking concrete. Fuck!”
Sandy couldn’t do anything.
“We were talking about having kids. You know, once all of this shit is over with Master—or Andrew—fuck.” Pussy stopped, pausing as he pressed his head against her hand, gathering his thoughts. “Sasha wants kids, but she’s terrified, scared. She can’t see, and she doesn’t think it will make her a good mother.”
“Do you want kids?”
“I want to have whatever Sasha wants. She doesn’t want to have kids that she can’t care for herself. I’ve had to fight for her. Devil considered her a liability to the club, a risk. I fucking love her. I don’t care if she can’t see or not. I’d leave the club before I got rid of her.”
“She knows this.”
“I just want her to know I love her, and I’ll do anything for—”
The machine beside Sasha started beeping, and her body tensed up.
Sandy reacted, pressing the emergency button, and moving Pussy out of the room. There was no time to explain. She hated the fact she was scaring him, but there was nothing else she could do. This required immediate attention. The doctor rushed inside and started to check her vitals.
“We’ve got to relieve the pressure in her head. Get me set up for an emergency procedure.”