by Diana Palmer
Chapter 5
Anna thought she’d never get through the next morning. Only the thought that Randall was coming for her made it bearable. If she had to watch Evan with Nina, it would be for the last time. Presumably when he heard about her engagement, he’d realize that she’d given up on him and maybe then he’d leave her alone and stop taunting her with what she couldn’t have. The humiliation of knowing that Evan was totally aware of her helpless passion for him was unbearable. Having him flaunt Nina at her was worse.
Sure enough, at ten minutes before noon, Evan came past the window as he did now every day. But he was alone this time. Nina wasn’t with him.
Anna clenched her hands together in front of her, grateful that Mr. Taylor was in the gallery, going over their frame inventory, when Evan walked in the door. At least she wasn’t on her own.
“Well, hello, Evan,” Brand Taylor said with a smile. “Nice to see you. Anything in particular you’re looking for?”
Evan was taken aback. He hadn’t planned on Taylor being in. Most days, when he went past the gallery Anna was alone. Today, of all days, she wasn’t.
“No, I’m…browsing, thanks,” Evan said.
“Go ahead, then. Anna can help you with prices, if you see something you like.”
Anna wasn’t looking at him, though. Her eyes were almost frantic, riveted to the front door. His face hardened. Was she hoping to be rescued? Remembering his recent treatment of her, he realized that he couldn’t blame her. He’d tried so hard to resist his hunger for her, but he couldn’t quite live without her. He’d cope somehow with his fears, he’d have to. But her face wasn’t encouraging, and he had a flash of panic as he realized that he might already be too late. She looked…
He hesitated, his dark eyes sweeping over her. She’d lost weight. The beige suit she wore didn’t fit as closely as it had, and there were new lines in that pretty face, new hollows under her high cheekbones. She looked elegant and brittle.
He moved toward her, hating the way she jerked around and took a step backward when she saw him coming. Had he hurt her so badly?
Her eyes glanced off his gray suit and pearly Stetson. He was dressed for travel, she imagined, not knowing that he’d worn his best clothes just to see her.
“Was there something you wanted to know?” she asked in a forcibly steady tone, and made herself look at him.
Her eyes were deep blue and full of pain. It hurt him to see it and know that it was because of him.
“Yes,” he said, his voice almost hesitant. His eyes fell to her soft mouth and back up to hold her gaze. “Anna, I…”
The bell on the front door drew their attention. Randall came in, smiling at Mr. Taylor before he walked to Anna’s side. He knew how she felt about Evan Tremayne, and protective instincts he didn’t even know he had welled up inside him. He slid an arm around her waist and kissed her forehead with deliberate possession, not missing the flash of Evan’s stormy eyes or the surprise on his dark face.
“Hello, darling,” he told Anna gently. “Ready to go?”
“Yes,” Anna choked. “I’ll just get my purse.”
“We’re picking out the rings today,” Randall told Evan levelly. “Anna and I are getting married at Christmas.”
Getting married. Getting married. Getting married. Evan heard the words echo in his mind until he thought he’d gone mad. Anna was going to marry Randall. They were going to pick out rings. He’d come here today to apologize to her, on his knees if necessary, to ask her out on what would have been their first real date. He was going to try to build a relationship with her. But Randall had beat him to it. He’d hurt her, tormented her into accepting Randall’s proposal. For the rest of his life, he’d have to live with that. She didn’t love Randall or want him, but she was going to marry him.
“You might congratulate us,” Randall prompted. “I’m going to make her happy. I swear I am.”
How can you, Evan was wondering bitterly, when she loves me? But he didn’t say it. He rammed his hands into his pockets, drawing the fine fabric of his slacks taut over powerfully muscled legs, and his eyes smoldered as they went to Anna’s pale face.
“I’m ready when you are, Randall,” Anna told him quietly, and Evan had to look hard even to recognize that she was the same woman he’d known only weeks ago. The bright spark, the impish nature might never have been. Anna had matured to middle-age overnight, gone calm and quiet and elegant. At that moment he’d have given anything to see her the way she was.
“I’m coming. See you around, Evan,” he told the older man, smiling as he went to take Anna’s arm.
Evan watched them go with dead eyes. She was going to marry Randall. And when she looked up and met his gaze, he knew why. She was doing it to show him that she wasn’t chasing him anymore, that he was free of her, because that was what she thought he wanted. Heaven knew, he’d given her more than enough reason to think so.
“Oh, God, no!” he ground out in a tortured whisper and started toward them. He had to stop her.
But as he nodded to Taylor and left the shop, Nina drove up to the curb and called to him.
“There you are!” she waved gaily. “I missed you at the office, so I thought I’d meet you here!”
Anna heard her, but she didn’t look back. What a good thing Randall had come for her. She’d thought, hoped, that Evan might have come just to see her, but he’d been meeting Nina there, flaunting her again. No wonder he’d been in such a rush to get out of the gallery, and she’d dared to dream he was coming after her! Well, so much for dead hopes.
She slid her hand into Randall’s and walked along beside him, half-numb, listening while he told her what he’d planned for the weekend. He might as well have been giving her a weather report, for all the interest she showed.
That afternoon, after work, she went home alone. On an impulse, she stopped by the civic center to see what concerts were planned for the weekend. Randall’s emerald solitaire winked in the soft light, gracing her long, slender hand. The symbol of his intention to marry her, and it didn’t even touch her heart. She was saving Evan from herself, she thought bitterly, that was all. She didn’t dare think about what marriage to Randall would be like, or she’d go mad.
Tears stung her eyes and began to roll down her cheeks while she stood there. And she suddenly realized, horrified, that Miranda Tremayne was standing beside her.
“Oh, Anna,” the older woman said, grimacing. She put her arms around Anna without even thinking, comforting her.
It was so unexpected that Anna was totally without a defense. She cried until her throat hurt, grateful that pedestrian traffic was almost nonexistent for the moment. She pulled away finally, and Miranda produced a tissue out of the pocket of her maternity dress.
“Feel better?” she asked gently. “It’s Evan, isn’t it?” she added with resignation, nodding at Anna’s surprised look. “Yes, I know. We all know what he’s been doing, throwing Nina in your face. I used to think that Evan was a big teddy bear, but Harden wasn’t kidding when he told me Evan had fangs. I never dreamed he could be so cruel.”
“I drove him to it,” Anna sniffed. “It’s my own fault.”
“He could have stopped it anytime he wanted to, just by having a quiet word with you,” Miranda said angrily. “This isn’t like him. He’s been terrible at home ever since he came back from Denver.”
“He hates me,” Anna said unsteadily. “I’m not kidding. I mean, he really hates me! He made fun of the way I felt about him and laughed at Randall…I’m marrying Randall,” she added weakly, showing her ring. “Isn’t it pretty? We’re going to live in Houston.” She burst into tears again. “Oh, I am sorry,” she apologized, red eyed. “I didn’t realize how much he hated me. It must have embarrassed him terribly when I ran after him!”
Miranda could have backed a truck over Evan with pure delight at the moment. She patted Anna’s shoulder awkwardly. “That doesn’t mean he has any right to hurt you like this.”
“
This is just the aftershock,” Anna said stubbornly, dabbing at her eyes. “Once Randall and I are married, I’ll be fine.”
“Not if you love Evan,” Miranda said sadly.
Anna ground her teeth together, but her lower lip trembled ominously. “I’ll stop loving him,” she choked. “I’ll have to.”
“Evan keeps secrets,” Miranda said slowly. “I don’t know what they are and Harden won’t tell me. But there’s some reason for the way he treats you.”
“It’s my age,” Anna replied. “He thinks I’m a child.”
“There’s more to it than that, I’m sure of it,” Miranda replied. “Anna, I wish there was something I could do.”
Anna smiled at her. “You’re very kind,” she said. “Harden’s so lucky, to have someone like you. He was worse than Evan, you know. Most women around here were scared to death of him. He could look right through you.”
“He’s mellowed.” Miranda grinned, patting her stomach. “Not that he’s tame. None of the Tremayne men are. But he’s all I’ll ever want.”
“I think that would go double for him,” Anna said softly and smiled. “I have to go. You won’t…mention that I was standing out here bawling my head off?”
“I won’t tell Evan anything, Anna,” came the gentle reply. “But I do wish you’d reconsider what you’re doing.”
“I’m doing the only thing I can, short of joining the French Foreign Legion.” Anna sighed. “I’ll be happy with Randall.”
Miranda wanted to question that cool statement, but she couldn’t. Anna was headstrong and stubborn, and she seemed perfectly capable of cutting off her nose to spite her face. As for Evan…
She went home fuming. Harden was sitting in the living room with his mother, Theodora, when Miranda walked in and flung her purse on a chair.
“Are you all right?” Harden asked, immediately concerned.
“Oh, you mean the checkup,” she said, preoccupied. “Yes, I’m fine. The doctor says I’m progressing beautifully.” She bent to kiss him gently. She smiled down at him, her love echoing back from his glittery blue eyes. “The baby is just fine.”
“Thank God.” He sighed. “The way you looked when you came in spooked me.”
“I want to kill your brother,” she told him.
“Which one?” he returned.
Theodora chuckled as she worked her embroidery thread into a complicated floral design. “Evan,” she guessed.
“How did you know?” he queried.
“He’s the only bachelor left.”
“Good point,” Miranda agreed, “and I hope he gets to stay that way for life. If you could have seen Anna…”
“What about Anna?” Harden asked softly.
“He’s cut her to pieces. She was in tears. And that’s not the worst of it. She’s going to marry Randall.”
Harden’s face went taut. “She doesn’t love him.”
“It’s to show Evan that she’s through chasing him, I know it is,” Miranda said miserably. “She’s running, and you know as well as I do that he’s given her every reason in the world to want to get away from him. She’s convinced that he hates her.”
“He acts like it lately,” Harden had to admit.
Theodora looked up from her needlework. “Love and hate are twins, you know. You can’t hate somebody unless you can love them.”
“He’s never been in love, not really,” Harden replied. “Oh, he thought he was. He had a bad experience, and it’s blinded him to a lot of things. Anna’s not his problem. It’s all in his mind.”
“What are you talking about?” Miranda chided.
“I can’t tell you without breaking a confidence,” he said. He smiled at her. “No secrets, I know, but this is Evan’s, not mine. You’ll have to let him deal with it.”
“He’s waited too late,” Theodora said sadly. “I’m sorry. Anna’s very young, but she’s sweet and generous and loving. He could do so much worse.”
“I hope Randall will be kind to her.” Miranda sighed. “But I’m not sorry for Evan,” she added angrily. “He didn’t deserve her in the first place. I hope he marries that Nina of his, and I hope she gives him hell twice a day!”
Theodora laughed at her rage, but Harden didn’t. He knew what Evan was afraid of, why he was running from Anna. What a pity that he couldn’t face the threat of his own strength and deal with it. Now he’d lost the one woman in the world who’d ever really loved him. Harden felt sorry for him.
For days after that, Evan kept to himself, not even talking to the people around him. He threw himself into ranch work with a zest that surprised and exhausted his own men, because while he was punishing himself, they had to suffer with him. He pushed them during the late summer roundup of bulls until one of them quit, which was what finally brought him to his senses.
“I’ve never seen so many cowboys in church on Sunday,” Theodora mused when they had supper that night. “They all seem to say the same thing—please, God, save us from Evan.”
“Cut it out,” Evan muttered. He didn’t smile. He hadn’t for a long time. The lighthearted man Miranda remembered from her first days at the ranch might never have been.
“God, you remind me of myself,” Harden remarked dryly, glancing down the table at him. “All bristles and thorns lately.”
Evan didn’t answer him. He finished his coffee and got up. “I’ll see you later.”
“Taking Nina out again?”
“Who else?” Evan replied without looking at him. He kept walking.
Miranda just shook her head. He got worse by the day.
Evan had taken Nina to a play in Houston, but he was surprised and infuriated to find Randall there—with a woman who was definitely not Anna. This one was tall and brunette and wearing a dress that left nothing at all to the imagination.
He cornered the man at intermission, his dark eyes threatening.
“I thought you were engaged,” he said curtly.
“I am,” Randall replied. “This is my cousin Nell.”
Evan glanced at the woman and laughed shortly. “Sure she is.”
“Listen,” Randall said curtly, “Anna and I have an arrangement which is none of your business.”
“Does she know you’re out with Cousin Nell?” Evan persisted.
“No, but she will, because I never had any intention of covering it up,” Randall replied honestly. “At least Anna will be better off with me than she would with you,” he added coldly. “I’ll never cut her up the way you did.”
Evan exploded. He actually reached toward the other man, but a crowd of returning patrons interrupted the movement and he regained his control. He turned on his heel, rejoining Nina.
“What was that all about?” Nina demanded petulantly. “Trying to live Anna’s life for her again?”
He looked down at her with eyes that threatened. She actually backed away.
“Anna is my business, not yours,” he said, every word measured and dangerous.
Nina swallowed. “Don’t you mean, she’s Randall’s? After all, it’s him she’s engaged to.”
He took her arm and escorted her back to their seats. He didn’t say another word to her then or later.
The next day he stopped by Polly’s office on the pretense of business. But once the door was closed and he was sitting comfortably in one of her wing chairs, he tossed his hat aside and leaned forward intently.
“Randall was out on the town in Houston last night with some brunette,” he said shortly. “He’s already two-timing Anna, and they aren’t even married yet.”
Polly was shocked, not only by the information, but by the anger in Evan’s voice as he told her about it.
“What kind of marriage is it going to be, for God’s sake?” he ground out. “Her pride won’t stand that kind of treatment!”
“Evan, I appreciate your concern,” Polly said quietly. “But it’s Anna’s life.”
“My God, she’s ruining it!” he exclaimed, throwing up his hands. “Don’t you c
are?”
Polly’s eyebrows lifted. “Aren’t you the man who’s been doing his best to chase her into Randall’s arms for the past few months?”
He grimaced. “I thought it would be the best thing for her,” he said shortly. “Randall’s going to make a good doctor, a good provider. I figured once they got engaged, he’d at least be discreet about his affairs.”
“He is,” Polly replied. “Houston is a long way from Jacobsville.”
“If I saw him, other people from here could.”
Polly leaned back in her chair, studying his angry face. “Evan, how do you know the woman he was with wasn’t his cousin?”
He let out a rough sigh and rested his forehead on his bunched hands. “My God, I don’t. But you know what he’s like.”
“Yes. And so does Anna. She’ll be amply provided for, and she’ll keep busy in Houston. That’s where they’re going to live when they’re married.”
It was killing him. Killing him! He got to his feet with a harsh groan, grabbing up his Stetson.
“Anna thinks you hate her,” she said, noticing that he didn’t face her, that his back was rigid. “Do her a favor and let her keep on thinking it.”
He twisted the Stetson in his hands. “Why shouldn’t I?” he asked huskily. “It’s the truth.”
“Is it, really, Evan?” she asked softly.
He didn’t answer her. He slammed the Stetson over one eye and went out, without ever looking back.
Polly watched him leave and felt a twinge of sorrow for all of them. Evan loved Anna. If she’d ever wondered about his feelings, she knew now. It was a raging, helpless kind of love that he was fighting with everything in him, tearing her to pieces to keep her from seeing how vulnerable he really was. And Anna loved him, deathlessly. But neither of them was going to give in, least of all Evan, who for reasons of his own wanted no part of loving. Polly could have wept. She wished she could tell her daughter, but it would serve no purpose. Evan wasn’t going to give in to it, she knew that instinctively, but if Anna went too close to him, he’d savage her. He might have already done that. Polly knew he’d been taunting her. She was sure he hated her. It was just as well. She could do worse than Randall, and perhaps someday, she’d even get over Evan.